Well, first off, thanks for reviewing, those who did
Well, first off, thanks for reviewing, those who did. To clear up things- I do have cookies, and some candles. Now… about coffee… I have mentioned before that I do not drink coffee, but my cat is named Latte, so he's my caffeinated cat. I do not have a Wii. I do not have three million cell phones. How dare you think I have that number of cell phones? At my last count, my family owns 1301272091834092893484092380923 cell phones. Oh wait, the piece of paper is upside down… make that 17. ish. Half of them don't work though. They're just old cell phones that can't do anything except call 911. And we also have about six that my sister either a) dropped in water b) spilled water over or c) dropped in someone's yard and only found it again after it rained. So…. We good on what I do or do not own? Good! Now onto the story!
Special thanks to Leafsong. She helped to write this chapter. Well…. she kinda DID write this chapter. With help from me of course (meaning I did virtually nothing).
After I got away from Leafecho's jabbers, I chased Firepaw around in circles at the Tribe's territory. I did not detail anyone. But I did go and pour coffee over Firepaw. That was fun. Coffee didn't seem to like it. But are kittypets ever happy? (BTW- Coffee is my kitty's brother.) I discovered I had Writer's Block, so I hit my head over the wall a couple times. Unfortunately, I ended up in the hospital, because I had the hugest headache ever in history, and a HUGE bump on my forehead. The worst part about spending the next two weeks in the hospital, besides not having my imaginary Wii or my cell phones, and not being allowed coffee (oh the horror!), was that THUNDERCLAN visited me! Apparently, a lot had happened in two weeks. Firepaw was no longer Firepaw! He was Fireheart! I had been lazy for a while, so they all grew up while I was sleeping! So they only grew up by about one month, but oh well! My little torturing victims were all grown up! But Thunderclan's visit went pretty much like this:
Fireheart: How are you, Leafy?
Me (Lefy): Fine
Fireheart: Not you, Lefy. I meant Leafy! You know… Leafpool?
Me: But Leafpool isn't born yet…
Fireheart: So?
Me: …
Random Nurse Number 532384328742389: (enters) Sorry sweetie, no pets allowed!
Me: But they're not pets! They're my inspiration!
Random Nurse Number 532384328742389: Sorry, honey. Inspiration or not, they have to go.
Me: I don't think you realize I could blow you up!
Random Nurse Number 532384328742389: Excuse me?
Me: You heard me! I wrote this story and made you up! So I can blow you up whenever I want. So I'll press this button conveniently made just for me (pushes button that says "Blow up Random Nurse Number 532384328742389)
Random Nurse Number 532384328742389: (Blows up like a balloon.)
Me: Urgh! That's the 532384328742389 nurse that got filled with air! Where's my next nurse?
Random Nurse Number 532384328742390:(enters) Here I am, master!
Me: Cut out the nonsense with the 'master'. I don't want the audience to think I have a slave or something.
Random Nurse Number 532384328742390: But I AM your slave… All 532384328742390 of us were your slaves…
Me: Be quiet! Now read your script!
Random Nurse Number 532384328742390: (Shuffles some paper) (Says rather mechanically) Sorry sweetie, no pets allowed!
Me: But they're not pets! They're my inspiration!
Random Nurse Number 532384328742390: Sorry, honey. Inspiration or not, they have to go.
Me: I don't think you realize I could blow you up!
Random Nurse Number 532384328742390: Excuse me?
Me: You heard me! I wrote this story and made you up! So I can blow you up whenever I want. So I'll press this button conveniently made just for me (pushes button that says "Blow up Random Nurse Number 532384328742390)
Random Nurse Number 532384328742390: (Explodes into flames)
Me: Coolio x1000
Leafsong: Coolio x 1001! Beat that!
Me: Oh no, you didn't!
Leafsong: No, I didn't
Me: Don't make me snap my fingers in a Z formation, exclamation! Talk to the hand, talk to the fist, OMG! you just go dissed! Wait… what?
Leafsong: I didn't put that frog in your backpack. That was Firestar.
Me: Firestar?
Leafsong: Yah. You know Firepaw/heart/star?
Me: But he was Fireheart last I knew…
Leafsong: Well, you've been very busy with your experiments. You had to test the 532384328742390 times to see if your "Blow Up Button" worked.
Me: Good point… Hey wait… a frog?
Leafsong: Ummm… yah! See ya later, Lefy!
Firestar: Ummm… Yeah! See you later, Lefy! I'm going to… talk to Skydream now…
Me: Skydream? Who's she?
Firestar: Oh yeah, she's my other daughter.
Me: So Sandstorm had another litter of kits?
Firestar: OF COURSE NOT!! I'm SOOO over Sandstorm! Whitewing was much prettier.
Me: Dude… by the time she was born, you would have been about a bijillion gazillion seasons old. You're too old for her.
Firestar: Yeah… that's what Goldstreak said
Me: Goldstreak?
Firestar: Yeah… my sixteenth mate.
Me: SIXTEEN?!
Firestar: Yup! But now I have twenty. Spottedleaf, Sandstorm, Whitewing, Goldstreak, Goldenflower, Ferncloud, Brightheart, Mousefur, Sorreltail, Russetfur, Nightcloud, Tawnypelt, Steakpelt, Mistyfoot, Willowpelt, Frostfur, Mothwing, Marigoldtail, and Heatherstreak.
Me: ...
Leafsong: …
Me: When did you come back?
Leafsong: Oh, I'm not really here, I'm really in there (points to Lefy's head)
Me: Well that makes it all better then!
Leafsong: …
Me: Anyway, Firestar, all those cats are either too old for you, too young for you, or in a different clan!
Firestar: So?
Me: THAT'S IT!!
Everyone: What?
Me: Leafsong, I'm NEVER letting you write a chapter again!
Leafsong: BUT IT'S SO MUCH FUN!! (Bursts into tears)
Me: Oh stop acting. Save it for Broadway
Leafsong: Well now that you mention it, I just got an acceptance for Gr-
Me: Oh be quiet. (turns to audience) I'm sorry for this inconviencince. I let my friend write this. And I'm too lazy to change anything she wrote. So, if you're unhappy… Cry me a river, build me a bridge AND GET OVER IT!! So please wait until I actually have time to do something… try thirty years or so! So, so long, farewell, goodbye!