Author's Note :

First of all, let me thank Jordana Kari and Vampire-Nightwish-Lover for reviewing my story - it means a lot for me and keeps me going.

Second, I'd like to apologise for the lack of updates and signs of life in general - my computer DIED and you know what kind of sh... problems you have to face then... not to mention the rage you have when you discover half of your files are LOST for ever... 8( (yes, that's a smiley...)

Alright, read and review !

"As you can imagine, my father was not really happy about it. He warned me all the more every time I was coming back from a trip down the 'hot and cheap' quarters. He said he could smell it on me, that I was dishonouring myself and my family, and that is was a shame I was wasting the house's hardly-earned money on sluts and cheap plonk. But it entered my left ear just to leave by my right one, and it had no time to sink in the way. Usually, my mother said nothing, and my siblings were curled up in a corner as my father yelled and shouted. I would just go and lock myself in my tiny room. Then I would stare at the ceiling and smirk, thinking about my day.

Then the Fire Festival came. The spring was hot this year, so people were wearing light clothes and girls had short vaporous skirts, showing navel and legs' curves. I had been eagerly expecting the festival to spend the all night with my friends, a tasty beer, and a couple of easy girls. What do you know, I was a teenager. It looked promising. But I was running out of money, since my father would not trust me with it anymore. He expected from me to spend the festival with my siblings. I was not really grabbed, but the night of the festival, I found myself with 3 kids stuck to me anyway.

Anjin and Shinzo came to pick me up; we were supposed to meet with the others later. It seemed like our plans were being compromised. We went to a little restaurant nearby. Shinzo ordered the children some delicacies to keep them busy while we were working out what we should do. We drank a bit in the meantime, and we decided to leave the children in the Sudar square. It was a clean and long square in a safe part of the suburb we lived in, and there were always some performers there. Some would show off with magic trick or firebending arts, or there would be Fire dancers or acrobats. The kids would like it, and by chance be captivated enough to leave us alone for some time. It seemed a good idea with a bit of alcohol in our heads. So we just took my two brothers and my sister to Sudar square.

There were garlands of red and gold lantern stretched between the roofs of the surroundings houses, and almost everybody wore colourful masks. The air smelled spices and caramel. And luckily there was a stage on a side of the square where young girls were showing their contortionists' skills. Their shiny diadems mocked the shape of flames and their copper bangles were jangling noisily. All of this was perfect to entertain and mesmerise young children.

' Shun, Naoki, I want you to watch over your sister. I trust you with this duty, so behave yourselves ! And have fun. I'll come to pick you up when the show is over. Here, buy something to eat with this and don't leave the square".
And with that I shove a couple of copper pieces in Shun's hand, and I ran to Shinzo and Anjin. We left and met up with Guani and Kizari, and we roamed down every dive we could find. I lost all the money I had left in games that night, and I drank until I couldn't walk straight anymore. Anjin left in the middle of the night with a woman who apparently was used to sleeping around, and the others and I went out in streets. We joined a few other drunken men, apparently sailors, and we started bursting into bawdy songs. Then we went into a tavern and drank again, and one of the sailors offered us a mafe chicken, which is basically chicken slowly cooked in a thick groundnut sauce. Although fire nation's cooking is usually spiced up, it's quite a common plate in the Fire nation. It has a sweet and tender taste, and it was nice to balance out the spicy fire flakes I had eaten earlier that evening.

I think we stayed in the dive for a great deal of time, because I fall asleep. I was awaken at dawn by Anjin, who was shaking my arm worriedly.

'What are you doing here, was your night not so good ?'
I managed to say. I tried to give him a sly smirk, but I was feeling too sick to do so. The world was tangling around me, but I could still tell that Anjin was really anxious.

'Jee, did you spend all your night snoring in this street ?' he yelled.

His face contorted in fear. I could not answer his question.

'I don't know' I said 'how did I get here ?'

My voice was coming from far away and was clumsy, and talking was making my mouth feel distastefully bitter. Anjin helped me back on my feet, and just as I regained my balance I got sick. Anjin swore. He wiped my mouth with a handkerchief and slapped me hard. 'Damn ! What a mess you got into ! Look at yourself ! Please Jee, tell me you brought your siblings home yesterday before collapsing dead drunk on the pavement !' I couldn't tell if he was disgusted, angry, embarrassed, or just concerned. Maybe all of these. But his face looked so strange with all those conflicting emotions it took me a few moments to realise what he was talking about.

Then something in my blurred mind enlightened. 'Shun' I gasped. I felt my knees get weaker in the moment. I tried to run to Sudar square, but I only got sick again. I patted my now empty stomach and swallowed back the acid taste in my mouth, and I resumed running. Anjin yelled something at me, but I didn't care. Once I figured where I was, I got to Sudar square right away. But the square was empty now. I ran around the streets for hours, before I slumped breathless. The sun was already bright and clear, almost in its zenith. My belly contracted both hungrily and in pain and guilt, and the sound of my heartbeat echoed loud in my head.

'What I am to do, now ?' I silently cursed myself. I got sick one last time, and I felt more miserable than ever. I decided I should face my foolishness, and grovel to my parents.

I arrived at my house all sweaty and ashamed. My father opened the door before even I knocked it. 'Get in' he said.
His voice was levelled and serious. I entered the main room, and I felt to my knees. My mother held my 3 siblings close to her large chest, all of them looking safe and healthy. I cried. I was in such relief and joy to see they were fine. Then I heard my father slam the front door and stalk closer.

'It's over' he calmly said. 'This was the last bit of disappointment you would bear me. I've warned you, I've cared for you, I've given all I could give for you to have a good life. And this is how you reward my efforts ? Spitting at your family's face ? I've taken it all along. All of your failures, all of your disgraces, I've accepted all of them, because you were my son. But you've gone too far. I cannot cope with it anymore now. You've chosen those brainless drunkard and filthy sluts over your own flesh and blood.'

I could not answer anything. I had this coming.

'Look at Iku, she's only six. Had you noticed when you dropped her on that crowded square all alone with only a nine years old boy to protect her ? Did you not think it could be a tiny little bit dangerous for children under ten to spend the whole night with a drunk and sleazy mob ? Or were you yourself too drunk and sleazy to notice ? I'd say you were, for I dare to hope you did not forget them of your own free will !'

His voice had rose all the while he had spoken, so now he was almost shouting at me.

'That's a festival, which mean people tend to party, and so tend to drink, and so tend to be out of their mind and do stupid things ! I thought my own son could have a hold on himself. But he was just too eager to dump his own family at the threshold of the slum quarters to enjoy the festival on his own.'

Before this day, whenever he would yell at me, I would never listen to my father. But then I was just petrified. I hold my head low with shame.

'That's not problem though. Now you will have no restraints from entertaining yourself, no matter how dirty and dishonourable it gets. Because you're not my son anymore.'

My mother kept her eyes on the floor, and Shun looked at me both angrily and defiantly. But Naoki and Iku's eyes were glittering with tears. I was just resigned, I knew I should have never left my siblings alone.

'I suppose you at least remember where the door is' my father said. He handed me a small package. There were a few clothes, a bit of money and a small bread. I walked toward the exit.

'Surely if you're old enough to play around, you're old enough to get along by yourself" and then he closed the door of my former house.

I did not wish to stay in front of it, so I just walked around in no direction to clear my head. I needed it. After a while a growl reminded me my belly was empty and I stood for a while in a restaurant. I ordered some thick rice and vegetables and a hot cup of tea. I had just paid the waiter, and I had a look on the money I had left. The few copper pieces looked awfully small in my palm. I had to think of something… I had nowhere and no one to go to, I was about to run out of money, I had no job or qualification, and things did not look in a good start for me.

I had to be realistic. My friends would do nothing to help me. What kind of fool would get kicked out from his house at only 14 just for me to feel better ? Plus, I was just too resentful with Anjin and Shinzo for talking me into leaving Iku alone.

Besides them, the only person I would trust was Sai.

But what could she do ? 'She's in her twenties, you're probably just an inoffensive teenage to flirt and have fun with to her. You should not have too many illusions about her.'

Well, at least that was what my reason told me. A fun fact being that my reason had then the voice of my father. And frankly, it was greatly annoying. But there was another reason, a major one, to why I kept telling me this.

I would have thought myself a burden and a horrible weakling for letting the already poor girl support me. This was something I would never do as long as I had an once of dignity left. Both for me, and for Sai. She deserved better than a man unable to even feed himself.

I was dying to go to her, but I had to make my mind first : what was I going to do ?

The answer came as metal pointed boots hit the parquet of the restaurant. Three men dressed in Fire navy uniforms took their seats on a table. They ordered rich red wine and started chattering. I just looked and I thought 'well, why not ?'

Yes, why not ? I had not so much to lose anyway. There were no particular abilities required, just to be healthy and valid, and make a display of obedience. I would get a warrior training, possibly a firebending training, get a bed and some warm food, have some secure money and a quite respected place in society. And it would give me a chance to prove me loyal and worthy to my country and my kind. I had to give it a try.

Since I would be turning 14 the next week, I could engage myself in the nearby barrack of Kawkab. And then may happen what Agni sees fit.