Emmy's the Akatsuki style, the Halloween camp is coming!
M is for Me querer tacos!
Just for those who don't know what "Me querer tacos" mean, it means "Me want tacos".
Hmmm... I am so damn bored. I need to write a little more, yet I need top study :S Damn… I don't have much ideas of what to put here, just…
ENJOY!! (Or else… )
A wile after, the Akatsuki's noticed there wasn't anybody annoying the hell out of them.
"Oh shit! We forgot Tobi!" They all said nervously and giggling, covering their mouths with surprise. Some of them cracked-hysterically-up like mean bitches, some of them just thanked God (Or Jashin) and others, just didn't care enough to do something.
They all told (Or screamed, whatever goes first) Yuura to pull over and pick up Tobi. Surprisingly enough, Tobi had been running until then.
x-x-x-x
They were all in the car and then Pein looked at his watch again. They still had 3 hours to get there and be in the Emmy's, only that he knew that if you told them "We have 6 till the show!", they would have stayed until then in KFC. Wile he was wondering with his mind, he received an insistent nudge from the tired-of-running Tobi.
"Pein-sama, ehm…we have a problem…" He said nervously. Pein opened his mouth to say "What?" but Tobi gestured his clothes first. They were dirty as hell, full of chicken stains, mud stains and stains inside the stains. Pein just shut his mouth with a calm "oh-fuck-it" face. He turned around.
"HEY! Yuura-guy! Can you pull over at Gorgio Armani's Emporium??" He asked and Yuura nodded as he stirred the wheels. Tobi's eyes were wide open.
"I AM GETTING A GORGIO ARMANI TUXEDO!!" He screeched as everybody covered their ears.
"SHUT UP!" They all screamed back.
"T.T Sorry…" He muttered. But his sadness didn't last long, since a few minutes later, they arrived to the emporium. Yuura pulled over at the enormous blueish-transparent glass door and all of the villains came out of the limo, sick of Tobi's happiness.
"Shit, can't you stay your ass calmed down for ONCE in your fucking life, orange fuck head?" Hidan asked. He was pretty pissed that every time he wanted to tell his plans, he was interrupted.
Tobi didn't bother to responding, he was way way WAY to excited to care. The Akatsuki's decided to divide themselves among two groups of people that talked to each other (not because they were mad at each other, but because they simply liked those people), there was Itachi's group, that was formed by him, Kisame, Hidan, Kakuzu and Tobi and there was Pein's group, formed by the rest of the people (and by then, Sakura). Only that Tobi was being Pein's tail. And he was pretty pissed.
"Can you stop following me, Tobi!?" He asked. Tobi was jumping and twitching in happiness, talking away, but wasn't heard. He didn't care. They all came through the door to an ENORMOUS duplex building, FULL up to the ass of a fucking lot of clothes. Lots of EXPENSIVE clothes. Tobi's and Itachi's eyes became stars.
"SHOPPING!!" They both screamed as they ran to the counter to ask for a XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL bag. Pein sighted.
"I'm just buying whatever tux Tobi wants or needs so, Itachi, fuck off. Or else I will sicount your salary (WTF??)." He said annoyingly, since they were being a pretty gay pair of "villains". Itachi cascaded tears.
"BUT I WANT SHOPPING!" He said stubbornly. Kisame sighted at the man's behaivour.
"Oh my god, Itachi. Your lil' bro's right. You ARE a failure after all…" He muttered. Itachi gave him a dark frown.
"Don't you DARE to speak of my bro in my presence." He said. He looked dangerously serious. Kisame sweat-dropped.
"Ok, ok. Sorry, Itachi-san…" He said respectfully. And if he said Itachi-san instead of Tachi or Tachi-kun, he was scared as hell. Itachi then smiled.
"HAHAHA! SO GOTCHA!" He squealed. This time the frowner was Kisame.
"Not funny…"
"ZOMG! LOOK AT THIS TIE!" Tobi was checking the clothes at the tie department (yeah, it was THAT big) and he saw this silk orange tie with little black swirls in it, and he loved them. And the tie too.
Pein slapped his face and then hit his head on the wall several times. And then, when he was done with his small daily dozes of masochism for the day, he looked at Tobi with the same "FUCK" face he looked at Hidan, that thought that was a great time to smash his brains out with the wall.
"WHEEE!! I THINK I SEE MY BRAAAAIIIINS!!" The smashed-till-fucking-unconscious Hidan said, he looked like drunk Deidara and Itachi. Suddenly, Zetsu came near to Pein.
"Hey Pein, you know that if your hand is smaller than your face, you have leukemia?" He told him casually, as he saw him slapping his face. Pein looked at him wide-eyed and placed his hand over his face. Zetsu giggled sadistically.
PUUUUUUUUUUNCH!!Zetsu gave Pein's hand an punch with a great deal, I mean, an ENORMOUS deal of force.
The punch was so strong, he started bleeding. Zetsu, by his part, was weeing in his pants, rolling on the floor. Konan just looked really surprised.
Pein removed his hand, to reveal a great, bleeding wound he had in his forehead. His face was white, really pallid. But, SERIOUSLY pallid. Zetsu was still laughing brutally, but everybody rushed to where Pein was, except for Sakura, that Deidara (taking advantage of Pein's distraction) kicked out of the criminal gang. Kicked her in her drawn ass.
Suddenly, Pein stirred his head lightly and closed his eyes. He fell.
Boooooph…
He fell on Hidan's arms. He was quick enough to see he was about to fall.
"Dude, what the hell happened?!" He asked, he hadn't noticed the punch Zetsu gave him. Konan hurried and kneeled near to Hidan. She looked at Pein tearfully wile she looked at the blood.
"WHAT'S THE FUCKING MATTER WITH YOU!? CAN'T YOU SEE PEIN IS FUCKING BLEEDING!?" She screamed at Zetsu, that hadn't notice Pein was actually bleeding, and he stopped laughing. Then he realized that everybody was circling the pale Pein. His wound looked pretty bad and was bleeding incredibly. Hidan, if he wasn't so freaked out, would have started to do disgusting stuff I'm just not writing down.
"Oh my god. I didn't mean to give him that hard!" Zetsu said as he stood up and hurried up to where he was. Tobi had stopped looking at the ties and came near with Itachi, Deidara and Sasori.
"What happened to Pein-sama!?" He asked nervously, since he hadn't seen. Kakuzu explained all.
"I guess he might had something his hand so he could get that badly injured…" Kakuzu predicted and then a light-bulb appeared above Itachi's head.
PING!
"The ring!" He called out and Hidan, the only fucktard that dared to touch blood, looked in his hand and looked at the ring. Then he looked at the wound.
"Yeap. Tachi's right. It was the ring."
"Lets take him to the ER!" Konan said worriedly. She was about to have a nervous breakdown and crying breakdown. Pein looked so calm, he even looked dead.
" So we get to see George Cloney!?" Tobi said excitedly. Everybody gave him serious glares.
"NO!!" They all bellowed, really mad. It wasn't Tobi's intention to be so stupid. So he tried to back away.
"Ok, sorry, sorry. Gosh, I didn't know for God sake." He said annoyingly. Everybody couldn't care less, since they were really worried. Deidara slapped gently Pein's face with the back of his hand.
"He is still warm, hn…" He opened Pein's cloak and put his head on his chest."…and his heart is still beating, meaning he is still alive. But we need to get him out of here, coz people are starting to come." He said wile looking around. People just stared.
"What? Can't a villain study a short medicine course?" He asked, pleased with himself. Konan was sobbing and Zetsu hugged her. He felt really guilty. It wasn't like he wanted Pein to bleed that intensely. It was just a joke, not something mean he wanted to do.
"I'm sorry, Konan. I-I didn't mean to do that, is just…I didn't mean it!" Black Zetsu told Konan hurriedly. Now, he was the one that felt sick and that wanted to cry.
-x-x-x-
Konan was still being hugged by Zetsu as everybody came out of the Emporium, Pein, being carried away. Deidara was carrying the bed with one of the male nurses.
"Well, who is going to go with the kid? Only two people can come. Sorry, dep rules…" The man asked and everybody talked between them. They all wanted to go.
"Aww man. If Pein was here, he would have chosen who would have gone with hi-" Hidan started.
SMACK!
Konan slapped Hidan's face.
"DON'T TALK AS IF HE WERE DEAD!" She screamed between tears. She looked pitiful. Hidan looked at her with sad eyes.
"I'm sorry…" He apologized, but Konan didn't care.
"I'll go!"
Everybody looked at Konan. She made her way to the ER vehicle as the man looked at the blunette woman. He shrugged.
"Well, at least the lady is BRAVE." He said intentionally to all of the bunch of scared criminals.
"Shit…" They all muttered, except for Deidara, that was already in the vehicle, monitoring Pein's pulse.
"How is he?" Konan asked, she dried her tears and looked at him seriously.
"His pulse is alright, he has lost some blood, but he is alright. He just need some stitches and he'll be alright." Deidara said calmly. He knew Konan was trying to act brave. He knew her better than what people though.
"Ok…" Was the only thing she said, before taking seat in one of the seat-like large space with a leather cushion and kept silent.
xxx
Zetsu and Tobi were seriously scared. Zetsu felt guilty and Tobi felt sad.
"And I never got to buy what I wanted…" He said in a lamentable voice.
"FUCK HEAD!"
PUNCH!
And everybody punched him, even Itachi, because he was scared as well.
"Damn!" Tobi said as he fell to the ground, bruises even in his ass.
xxx
Deidara was trying to cheer up Konan by talking to her but although he kept on talking and talking, Konan stayed numb in her seat.
"…Well, the thing is, he always gets what he wants. And what about my needs? Hn?" But suddenly Pein shook slightly. Konan cried in happiness.
"PEIN!" And she hugged the orange-hair nin. He blushed.
"Konan…" He said in a weak, sick voice. Konan listened carefully.
"I-I need to tell you somexxxCough, coughxxxthing" Pein said between coughs. Konan looked at him warily, with distress tears in her eyes.
"Yes, Pein?"
"Konan…" He then coughed loudly.
"I am…
…your father…"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Konan screamed and then fell to the floor on her knees. Pein bolted his head to a side and shut his eyes.
"DON'T DIE!!" Pein then opened his eyes with an annoyed face.
" I'm not dead, you stupid. I'm taking a nap. Now, would you mind?." He said as he shut his eyes again. Konan sighted.
"Yo, wait. Am I really your daughter?" She asked and Pein shook his head.
"No…"
-.-
"You scared me asshole…" She told Pein as Deidara snickered.
":D Really!?"
SLAP!
"Yeah, really…" She slapped Pein and then he frowned.
"Fuck, that hurt!" He said as he rubbed his face.
"Are you feeling alright Pein? Is there something you want, hn??" Deidara asked. Pein looked at him wile he looked at the monitor, checking his pulse.
"Me querer tacos…"
x-x-x-x-x
They went inside the hospital (hospital? It is a fucking wound, its not like they had cut his head off or something…) and they sat down, waiting to be called. Pein fiddled with his fingers and Konan played with her legs. Suddenly, a short (1.40), fat and bulgy woman walked towards a wall.
"Nagato Fuuma here?" What seemed a nurse (or the bulldog-like woman) asked, wile looking at a clipboard with some papers.
"ITS PEIN, MA'AM…" Pein said annoyingly. The nurse didn't twitch. She scratched her arm pit. Konan looked at her with disgust.
"Come inside room…uh…404." She said as she made the bubblegum she was chewing, pop.
"Ok, but can my…errrr…friend? come in?" He asked stupidly. Konan slapped her face as she shook her head in disapproval.
"Aha… whatever. Just hurry up, Mr.Fuuma…" The nurse waved a hand a little in signal of disinterest and allowed the pair of people to follow her to room 404. Pein gritted his teeth.
"IT'S PEIN…" And he strolled off with Konan, following pudding-body.
x-x-x-x
After a wile in the hospital room number 404, an elaborated tour inside the emporium, again, and a trip to the public toilet, our criminal friends all gathered themselves inside of the Akatsuki-mobile. Once and for all. Fuck, they do like delays…
They had a 1 hour to get to the awards. Luckily, they were already the insides of Beverly Hills.
Pein was sorrowful in the way there because he had just realized Sakura had been kicked out and because he had a gigantic black (he said that, at least, it matched with his costume) patch in his forehead, covering the 10 stitches he had. Zetsu apologized every time they crossed looks, which he tried to avoid, since he was ashamed. The people didn't stop asking if he felt fine, if he wanted a glass of water, if he wanted to go for a wee, if he wanted to punch Tobi (that was the only thing he agreed) and a bunch of other stupid stuff. Like licking a cat's armpit.
Konan wasn't that mad with his boyfriend because she knew he didn't mean to deliberately open up Pein's forehead. But she made him promise he wouldn't do that kind of jokes to anybody. Well, not in the Akatsuki at least…
"Dear, you really need to control your strength…" Was the only thing she begged him to do, which he agreed. Well, he had to, he knew the deadly consequences of refusing.
"The thing is, I can't control my strength 100 percent coz I am half white half black. I'm like Michael Jackson…" He stated. Konan knew he wasn't lying, but she kept on repeating, just in case White Zetsu decided to listen to her for once.
"I know, love, but still. Tell WZ to control it's self or I will smash his head against a wall." She said dangerously. Zetsu sweat-dropped.
"I'll try, sweetie, I'll try…" He assured.
Pein was talking to Hidan that, for a man that doesn't give a crap about anybody else apart from Kakuzu and himself, was pretty concerned.
"Yo, it was terrible! That must hurt crapy bad… I mean, it was bleeding like hell! I really don't understand how didn't you died…Hm… I wonder why…fuck heads like you would have died." He speculated. Pein nodded.
-.-
"It did hurt. Well, not that much at least. Oh fuck it, it didn't hurt at all. But still…" He told Hidan, that looked dazzled.
"What? Then why the hell you passed out?" He asked. Pein shook his head side to side, like saying more-or-less.
"I have nosebleeds a lot, so I guess that this time it was foreheadbleed? I guess this time it caught me pretty bad, so I passed out from blood loss." Pein commented. Hidan nodded.
"Well that's got logic, actually…"
"Pein-sama, that thing happens to Deidara-senpai when he looks at photos of Sasori-senpai!" Tobi butted in (again) to the leader's conversation. Hidan was snickering.
"Kukukukuku…" He had the balls to do that, because he almost died from a nosebleed when he looked at one photo of Kakuzu posing
"Uh…That's great…"Pein said as he sweat-dropped.
"Sooooo…Somebdy said ma name?"Sasori said as he placed his arm and elbow on Tobi's shoulder. Tobi looked at him strangely.
"Uh…no?…" He said.
Everybody still talked until suddenly Pein looked around with an absent frown.
"SHUT UP!" He yelled. Everybody turn around to look at him.
"ME WANT TACOWS!!"
...
"And I want a million dollars. Now, shut up." Kakuzu shushed him.
"ME WANT TACOWZZZ!!" He screamed stubbornly, again.
PUNCH!
"SHUT UP!" They all screamed as they punched him.
…
"I still want tacowz…"
IM SORRY!! I hope this makes up for the wait :S I have been full up to the ass with maths summaries… Fuck, I hate them.
The good news is that in December I get into holidays, meaning I will update, like, everyday!
:D
Sorry for making you wait :(!!
-Lauren