Spurs A-Jinglin'

Lorelai slowly lowered her hands, her jaw dropping as she stared at the door. She blinked slowly and then whispered, "It's time?" Realizing that she had spoken the words aloud, she glanced around the deserted lobby and then took a deep breath, trying to calm her hammering heart. "What's that supposed to mean? It's time?" she muttered as she bent down to retrieve the sheet of paper that had drifted to the floor. She placed the sheet atop the others she had been reviewing and then pressed her hand firmly on the stack, holding them down as if they would spontaneously leap from the desk. She shook her head slightly, trying to dislodge the sound of Luke's voice, deep and husky as he said, 'I'm in love with you, Lorelai. I have been for years.' She lifted a trembling hand to her lips and glanced at the front door again.

"Hey Lorelai, I think I'm going to start with the low numbers and work my way up today," Kelly said as she ducked behind the front desk to retrieve the master key. "Oh, and you may need to talk to Manny about the linens again. It seems like we're losing hand towels and washcloths," she reported as she started to ward the steps.

"Kelly, wait!" Lorelai called. "Can you," she started as she hurried out from behind the desk. "Would you just keep an eye on things up here for a minute," Lorelai said as she held up one finger and hurried toward the kitchen door.

"Uh, sure, okay," Kelly said as she glanced down at her maid's uniform and then walked hesitantly to the desk.

"You're the best," Lorelai said in a rush as she pushed through the door.

"Who the hell does he think he is?" she demanded as she burst into the kitchen.

Sookie looked up at the sous chef that stood next to her with a befuddled frown and said, "He's Pedro, remember?"

"Who does he think he is? He decided it's time? He decided? He doesn't just get to decide!" Lorelai ranted, flinging her arms out to her sides.

"Get the pastry shells," Sookie murmured to Pedro from the side of her mouth. As Pedro hurried to move the trays of delicate pastry away from Lorelai's outstretched arms, Sookie stepped over and asked in an overly calm tone, "Who decided, honey? What did who decide?"

"He can't do that!" Lorelai said as she shook her head vehemently. "He doesn't just get to decide that it's time, ask me out to dinner and then come in here and tell me that he's in love with me. In love, Sookie!"

"Who's in love with you?" Sookie asked, her voice rising in frustration

"We didn't even have dinner! He couldn't even wait until dinner? Maybe tell me over dessert? Break the big news to me over a nice slice of cheesecake? He has to just march in here and tell me something like that? What gives him the right? Who said that he could decide?" Lorelai demanded.

"Work with me, sweetie," Sookie cajoled.

"We are not dating! We are not in love! He doesn't just get to decide! What if I say it isn't time? What if I say there is no 'something'?" Lorelai said, gesturing wildly as she paced the room.

"Hide the knives and get everyone out of here," Sookie murmured to a stunned Pedro. She watched as the rest of the staff followed Pedro out into the lobby, and then reached out to grasp Lorelai's arms firmly and held her still. "Talk to me," she said quietly.

Lorelai looked down at Sookie's hands for a moment, and when she lifted her head again, her eyes were filled with tears. "It changes everything, Sook. It ruins everything!"

"What does?" Sookie asked worriedly.

"He can't be in love with me," Lorelai whispered.

"Who can't, honey?"

"Luke."

Sookie's eyebrows shot up, but she tried to remain calm as she asked, "Luke Danes?"

"Yes, yes, Luke!" Lorelai said, getting agitated again. She pried her arms from Sookie's hands and wrung her hands as she began to pace again. "Why, Sookie? Why?"

"Why is he in love with you?" Sookie asked cautiously.

"Why is he doing this?" Lorelai cried plaintively.

"Okay, well, I only have part of the story, I think, but I definitely get the part about Luke being in love with you," Sookie said as she tried to puzzle it all out. When Lorelai glared at her, Sookie winced and asked, "So, Luke asked you to dinner?"

"Yes."

"And you said?" Sookie asked leadingly.

"Well, I said yes, but I didn't know it was a date!" Lorelai said defensively.

"Because you and Luke have dinner together all of the time?" Sookie asked incredulously.

"I just thought that he wanted to take me out to dinner, you know, as a thank you or something for helping out with his uncle's funeral."

"Okay, so you said you would have dinner with him."

"Yeah, and then I kind of half-jokingly asked if it was a date, and he said yes! Yes, Sookie!" Lorelai cried in frustration.

"And what did you say when he said yes?" Sookie asked, still trying to catch up.

"I didn't know what to say! I just said okay or something, and then came here!"

"Okay, so Luke asked you out, you said yes, he confirmed that it was a date, and you agreed," Sookie said with a nod.

"Well, what was I supposed to say?" Lorelai demanded indignantly.

"I'm just trying to get the story," Sookie retorted. "When did the, um, how did he tell you that he loves you?"

"No, not just that he loves me, Sookie. He's in love with me. Has been for years," Lorelai said emphatically.

"Wow, okay, wow," Sookie said softly. "Okay, how did he tell you that he's in love with you?"

"I was just out there, doing some paperwork, and then next thing I know, he's standing there! He tells me that he thought he was being clear, and realized that he wasn't, so he wanted to give me a chance to get out of it. And then, all of a sudden, he's telling me that he's in love with me!" she said as she pressed her palms to her temples and squeezed. "Oh my God, I can't breathe," she gasped.

Sookie sprang into action, pulling Lorelai over to one of the stools and rummaging through the drawers for a paper bag. She pulled one out and opened it with a flick of her wrist. "Here, honey," she said as she held the bag up for Lorelai to breathe into.

"I'm okay," Lorelai said as she tried to brush the bag away.

"Okay, okay," Sookie said, nodding as she tried to process everything that Lorelai had told her. "Well, okay, so Luke is in love with you. That's not really a surprise, is it?" she reasoned. "I mean, come on, it's been pretty obvious for a while. And, you can't pretend that you didn't know," Sookie said firmly as she pointed to Lorelai. "I've told you, everyone has told you, and now Luke has told you."

"Not helping, Sook," Lorelai groaned as she buried her face in her hands.

"What?" Sookie asked innocently. "It's out there. And don't try to act like you don't have feelings for him too," she added with a stubborn lift of her chin.

"Feelings?" Lorelai asked as she raised her head. "Yeah, friend feelings!"

Sookie snorted and said, "Yeah, right."

"What?" Lorelai asked, her eyes wide with righteous indignation.

"Please, Lorelai, I've seen you with him," Sookie cried, getting aggravated by her friend's deliberate denial.

"Seen me what with him?" Lorelai snapped.

"Sweetie, this has been a long time coming for the both of you," Sookie said in a gentler tone. "Come on, you defend him when Jess is acting like a jerk, you guys are always talking or teasing or flirting. You went on a sleigh ride with him, he bought your basket. Something goes wrong here or at the house, you call Luke. He needs help with an apartment or a funeral, he calls you."

"We're friends, Sook," Lorelai said as she shook her head adamantly.

"Lorelai, he went and bought a building because of you, and kept it because of you," Sookie insisted. "Guys just don't do that. Friends just don't do that!" She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. "I'm just saying that you guys have gotten a lot closer lately," she said cautiously as gently touched Lorelai's arm. "A lot closer. You count on each other. And, you know, given the feelings he had for you before, it's only natural that he might see this as being more."

"Maybe," Lorelai conceded petulantly.

"And I think, maybe, you might have been feeling a little of that too," Sookie added, cocking her head to look her friend in the eye.

"No," Lorelai said too quickly.

"Really?" Sookie asked skeptically. "You have never once looked at Luke and wondered what it would be like to be with him?" she asked in a voice laden with doubt.

"Not really," Lorelai hedged.

"You have never looked into those big blue eyes and wondered? You never thought about what that scruffy stubble would feel like if you kissed him? You have never, once, in all of these years, been tempted to reach out and touch that fabulous ass?" Sookie asked incredulously.

"Sounds like someone here has a little crush on Luke," Lorelai said evasively.

Sookie laughed and said, "I'm not dead. The guy is gorgeous. I would have bet that there is probably not a woman in town over ten and under a hundred that hasn't checked Luke out. Are you the only one, Lorelai?" she asked with a smirk.

"He's a good looking guy," Lorelai admitted reluctantly.

"He's hot," Sookie corrected.

"Does Jackson know you have the hots for Luke?" Lorelai retorted.

"I am just stating the facts," Sookie said as she held up her hands. "You don't think of Luke that way because you won't let yourself," she accused.

"I have to get back out front," Lorelai said as she slid from the stool.

"You know I'm right," Sookie said as she followed Lorelai to the door. "You think he's attractive, you care about him a lot, you count on him, and you trust him. Not just with you, but with Rory too," Sookie said in a rush to get her point across. "So, here's this hot, sweet, responsible, trustworthy, good guy," she said as she clanged both fists over her heart. "A guy who even cooks, and makes what you say is the best coffee in the world, and he's telling you that he's in love with you." When Lorelai turned to say something to her, Sookie just shook her head to stop her.

"He's in love with you, Lorelai," she said softly. Lorelai closed her mouth and swallowed hard as she felt her heart skip a beat. "If that's not what you want, if all of that isn't enough for you, I think, maybe, you're setting your standards a little too high, that's all I'm saying," Sookie said as she rubbed Lorelai's arm soothingly and then gave it a little pat.

"Uh, Lorelai?" Kelly called as she opened the kitchen door a crack. "I don't really know what to do out here."

Lorelai opened the door and looked out to see the kitchen staff huddled together just outside the door and an older couple waiting to check in at the desk. She turned to look at Sookie and said, "I have to get back to work. Thanks, Sook," she added brusquely and headed for the desk.

****

He couldn't help himself. Each time he stepped out of the kitchen, Luke eyed the phone warily, waiting for it to ring. As the afternoon dragged on and the phone remained silent, he felt that tiny flame of hope that had fueled his earlier confession flutter and grow stronger. By five forty-five he decided that he was tempting fate by remaining in the diner. He handed his spatula over to Caesar and headed for the curtain that shielded the steps to his apartment from the public eye. He climbed the stairs, wincing at the music he heard blaring through the apartment door. As soon as he stepped inside, he looked over at Jess' area and saw that his nephew was crashed out with a book open on his chest. In an attempt to avoid any conversation which may lead to having to explain where he was going, Luke didn't bother to turn the stereo down, knowing that doing so would wake Jess. Instead, he walked to his closet and started to pull hangers from the rod. After a brief debate, and a stop at his dresser, Luke carried his clothes into the bathroom to start getting ready.

As the water in the shower warmed up, he stripped off his flannel and t-shirt, taking the ball cap with them, dumping the entire wad of clothing carelessly on the floor. He bent to unlace his boots and then reached for the buckle on his belt as he straightened and caught sight of himself in the mirror. Luke paused, running his hand absently over the two day's growth on his cheeks as he inspected his reflection carefully. "I can't believe you said that," he whispered to himself. He shook his head quickly to clear it and finished undressing. He stepped into the shower, and shivered slightly before adjusting the taps and pulling the curtain closed behind him. He stood with his head bowed, letting the spray beat down on his neck and shoulders, his hand braced against the cool tile wall as he thought of everything that had led him to this moment. Carrot sticks offered in lieu of French fries, Lorelai's fingertip trailing along his cheek, her breath warm in his ear as she called him Snuffy.

He reached for the shampoo and tried not to think of the faint scent of coconuts that enveloped him as surely as her arms had at Rory's sixteenth birthday party. As his fingers massaged the shampoo through his hair Luke wondered what it would feel like if they were hers. He closed his eyes and saw her kneeling behind the counter, her eyes bright and dancing as they locked on his and he was lost. It was just one a million moments just like that. He was caught, irrevocably ensnared by her gravitational pull. He leaned in, and he would swear until his dying day that she did too, he just knew she had. Luke smoothed the lather from his hair, running his fingers through it, chasing the bubbles away until it squeaked through his fingers. He opened his eyes, blinking away the water that clung to his lashes as he tried to focus on the task at hand. He was getting ready to take Lorelai Gilmore to dinner. A date. A first date with a woman he had loved secretly for years, and not so secretly for the last four hours. And she hadn't called to cancel.

He reached for the soap and quickly began to wash, scrubbing himself clean, preparing himself for a fresh new chapter with the girl that had haunted his days and nights for longer than he cared to admit. But he had admitted it. And, at that moment, he didn't feel even the slightest pang of regret. After Louie's funeral, he had thought long and hard about what he wanted and what he didn't want. The second list was much longer then the first. He didn't want to be alone. He didn't want to be a surly, lonely, bitter old man. He didn't want people to have to be shamed into coming to his funeral. He didn't want to care more about the stuff he was taking with him than the people he had left behind. He didn't want to miss out on having someone in his life; someone who would be there for him, someone he could be there for, always. But most importantly, he didn't want to die knowing that he didn't even try.

All of these thoughts played through his head as he sorted through Louie's affairs, trying to dispose of the detritus that hadn't traveled into the afterlife with the old man. He had fielded countless phone calls from worthless relatives who couldn't be bothered to attend the services, but still wanted to know if anyone had claimed his broken down furniture, a lamp with a peacock shade or a collection of rusting old beer cans. No one questioned the thousands of dollars of priceless memorabilia that he had buried with Louie, but yet, his sister had left no less than three messages wanting to know if Louie had still had the 'really cool old green glass ashtray in the brass stand thingy'. Those nights spent sorting through the remnants of his uncle's life had dispelled any bitterness he may have felt about Mickey, Joe and Willie's rookie cards buried beneath six feet of freshly turned earth. He didn't want those. All he wanted was a chance.

Luke knew that he had to give it a shot, bite the bullet and let the chips fall where they may, because if there was one thing that he knew with unflagging certainty, it was what he did want. More specifically, who he wanted. "Lorelai," he whispered her name aloud as he stood under the spray once more, watching the soap rush down his legs and swirl into the drain. He wanted to argue the carrot sticks versus French fry argument every day. He wanted impromptu potlucks with Sookie and Jackson, he wanted to build runways for her, and he wanted to listen to her wax poetic about their teeny tiny town as sleigh bells jingled through a snowy night. He wanted her to smile for him, only him, her face lit by the light of a blazing bonfire. There was one thing he knew for certain, he would never let her slip away like Max did, or walk away from her like that idiot Christopher did over and over again. All he wanted was Lorelai. He wouldn't even care if she answered the door in a damn Yankees cap every night, as long as he was the guy that got to come home to her. The way he figured it, there was no use in fighting it anymore, the heart wants what the heart wants.

He finished rinsing off and turned the water off with a flick of his wrists before he reached around the curtain and yanked his towel from the bar. He ran the towel roughly over his hair before using it to dry the rest of his body, and then wrapped it around his waist. He yanked the curtain back, stepped out of the tub and began to clean the steam from the mirror with the heel of his hand. Luke ran his fingertips over his beard again and eyed the electric shaver that sat on the shelf above the sink. Finally, he reached into the medicine cabinet, removed his shaving cream, a razor and a long neglected bottle of aftershave, and then lined each of the items up on the edge of the sink. Moments later, the water ran in the sink as he stared at his lather covered face.

Carefully, he scraped the razor down his right cheek, trying not to focus too hard on the actual shaving itself, afraid that he would slice himself to pieces with an unsteady hand. Instead, he focused on the evening to come, keeping his eyes on the prize. Anyone who truly knew him would know that the events of the day had been almost entirely pre-meditated. Not necessarily the timing, he conceded with a slight smirk, but the intentions. There were very few things in life that Luke Danes did strictly on impulse. He had planned to ask her to dinner. He had planned to tell her straight out how he felt about her. It was just that he planned for those two happenings to be happening at the same time. As it was, he had lost the handle on the second part, laying his feelings out on the reservation desk, and practically begging for a rejection there and then. When it hadn't come, he was more relieved than he cared to admit. When that stupid phone that had been taunting him all afternoon remained silent, he was more nervous than he ever thought he could be.

He finished shaving with only one minor nick. He stretched the muscles in his face, sucking in a breath between his teeth as the alcohol in the aftershave bit into his skin, and then stuck a scrap of toilet paper to his chin to staunch the bleeding. He dragged the comb through his hair and let it air dry as he dressed quickly, tucking his blue shirt into his black dress pants, and debating whether he should attempt a tie or not. He opted not to, deciding that his leather jacket would be dressy enough for Silvano's. Luke opened the bathroom door and stepped out into a wall of sound that nearly made his ears bleed. He moved to his dresser again and rooted through the top drawer for a pair of dress socks. As he sat on the edge of his bed to pull the socks and his shoes on, he listened carefully for any sign of life from Jess' side of the apartment, cringing as heard only the sound of wailing guitars. "Man, that stuff is crap," he muttered as he set to work on his socks and shoes. By the time he had tied the second set of laces, he was convinced that his nephew was still out cold.

Quietly, he strapped on his watch, loaded his wallet and keys into his pants pockets, removed his jacket from its hanger, and crept toward the apartment door. His hand was on the doorknob when he heard Jess call, "Where are you sneaking out to, pretty boy?"

"Out. Don't wait up," Luke answered tersely.

"Wait, wait! You mean 'out' as in 'out on a date'?" Jess asked with a smirk. "Do we need to have the talk, Uncle Luke?"

"Can it," Luke growled as he yanked the door open.

"Aren't you gonna tell me who the lucky girl is? Hey, remember, no glove no love!" Jess called out with a laugh as Luke closed the door a little too forcefully behind him, the frosted glass rattling in its ancient frame.

"Like I'd tell you anything," Luke muttered under his breath as he headed down the stairs.

He walked straight out of the back door and into the alley where his truck was parked. Jiggling his keys in his hand, he checked his watch, only to see that he would have to drive around for about ten minutes before it would be an acceptable time to knock on Lorelai's door. He glanced at the back door of the diner and debated whether it would be better to go back in and endure the possibility of more of Jess' ribbing, or to go wander the streets aimlessly. He blinked as he realized that it was a no-brainer, and unlocked the driver's door. He sighed as he cranked the ignition and the old pick up roared to life. Jess was a complication that he couldn't deal with at the moment.

Luke shifted into first gear and began to creep down the narrow alley. Lorelai and Jess did not see eye to eye. For his part, Luke had tried to turn a blind eye to the animosity between them, hoping that they would warm up to each other eventually. Unfortunately, Jess did not make it easy for anyone to warm up to him. That is, anyone other than Rory. He turned down Plum Street and drove slowly through the fruit streets, letting his mind wander. Luke was not totally unaware of his nephew's interest in Rory, nor could he honestly say that he blamed the kid. Not only was Rory sweet and smart, she was also a very pretty girl. Not stunning and vivacious like her mother, but a quieter kind of pretty. But, Rory had a steady boyfriend, and that seemed to be that.

As he turned down Walnut and began to cruise the tree streets, Luke admitted to himself that although he didn't approve of his tactics, he had to give Jess a certain amount of credit for seeing the girl he wanted and setting out to worm his way into her life. Luke could also admit that watching his nephew inch closer and closer to Lorelai's daughter had spurred him on a bit. He didn't view it as inspiration necessarily, but more of a pre-emptive strike. He had sat back for too long, watched too patiently, and bit his tongue for too many times, just waiting for things to be right. There was no way he was going to let some little wannabe thug throw a wrench in the works now, not when things had been going so well.

He glanced at his watch again, and sighed when he realized that he had criss-crossed the entire town and still had another five minutes to kill. He hooked a right and headed toward the opposite end of town. Methodically, he worked the grid of streets back and forth, slowly wending his way closer and closer to her door. When he turned into her driveway, he smiled, pleased to see that he was almost a full thirty seconds late. "Wouldn't want to seem too anxious," he murmured as he parked behind her Jeep and looked up at the house.

He shook his head as he noted that every light in the place was blazing away. His eyes flickered up to her bedroom window as he opened the door, but he saw no play of shadow behind the curtains. He let the door close carelessly behind him and he made his way to the steps; keeping his hands buried deep in his pants pockets, trying desperately to look as if he were completely at ease, just in case she peeked out of one of the windows.

He knocked on the front door, and then quickly returned his hand to his pocket, where he immediately began to jingle his keys. "Yeah, that's smooth," he muttered as he craned his neck a little, trying to peer through the frosted glass. When no one answered the door, he glanced at his watch and then back over his shoulder, double checking to be sure that he actually had seen the Jeep parked in its usual spot. He waited another endless minute and then knocked again, this time a little louder. This time he stared straight ahead, his eyes boring into the opaque glass as he tried desperately to ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

When this knock went unanswered, he took a step back, his breath hitching in his chest. He ducked his head, blinking rapidly as he struggled to believe that she actually wasn't going to answer the door. It seemed a little too cruel for Lorelai, even if she did feel that he had rooked her into this date. He forced himself not to peep into the living room windows as he waited, counting off a full sixty seconds in his head. Finally, his shoulders slumped as he took his hands from his pockets and turned back to the porch steps.

His feet felt leaden as he descended the first two steps, and then suddenly his sense of self-preservation kicked in. He felt his knees tense as coil almost of their own accord, and before his brain could register the action, he leapt from the steps, landing solidly on the grass below. He pulled his keys from his pocket as he hurried across the lawn, desperate to be anywhere but there. His mind raced ahead as he wondered what the hell he was going to do for the next two or three hours to keep from having to answer Jess' questions if he were to show up back at the apartment.

Just as Luke reached for the door handle, he heard Lorelai call out, "Luke, wait!" and froze in place.