Ok, this chapter goes the following: Ron's already left the tent, leaving Harry and Hermione. Hermione cries all along that time, until some day she stops ... in front of Harry. What are this girl's thoughts?

Enjoy it!

Lyrics: "Hate that I love you" – Rihanna

Shared Moments Five: Just one reason to cry

Well I hate it
You know exactly what to do
So that I can't stay mad at you
For too long, that's wrong

Why. It was the only clear word to think about. To cry about. Not why she had met him, no why he had gone, not why he had even come with them. But why she had to love him. Why she had to dream of him, why she had to cry for him until her eyes were dried, why she had to hide her face from Harry every day and every night now, why it hurt so much. And it wasn't a question, it was just a word. Why. Because it didn't even need an answer; love hasn't got answers.

Because Hermione Granger knew that it was love, after all. At last, she could think about it, she could say it aloud to herself, she couldn't deny it anymore. It was love that made her notice the spot on his nose; it was love that made her hide the greeting card from Lockhart; it was love that made her argue about Crookshanks; that made her be the partner of Viktor; that made her refuse the offers to spend the summer with him; that made her drive mad when he dated Lavender; that made her suffer until exhaustion every time he was in danger; which made her crave for him to keep her company; just that it grew more and more through the years. But she had never wholy accepted this, because she was afraid. But now, why did she have to be afraid of anything, if he never came back?

So I despise that I adore
And I hate how much I love you boy
I can't stand how much I need you
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so.

But why, then, had he gone to her house that summer? Only because he felt pity for you. Why, he had hugged her every time she was sad this year? Because you are a stupid, crying for nothing. He feels pity for you. Why he seemed so disappointed when she said she will stay with Harry? Because he was possessed by the Horcrux, he didn't know what he was doing. And you thought he loved you.

She shuddered. The idea of Ron having the most remote romantic feeling at her would make her laugh, if it was a matter of fun. Ron, the Veela loving ─ though he refused to dance with that cousin of Fleur's ─ Ron, Lavender's ex-boyfriend ─ though he had not done anything to save their relationship ─ Ron, the insensible boy … though he always was there to hand her a handkerchief …

And you completely know the power that you have
The only one that makes me laugh
Sad and it's not fair how you take advantage of the fact that I
Love you beyond the reason why
And it just ain't right

And now, eight days after his departure, there she was, curled up on her bunk, crying, wrapped with his blankets, the blankets Harry had put on her that day, and which kept his sweet smell, the natural fragrance she smelled in the Amortentia. And now she knew she had to accept this: that she wasn't that much of a know-it-all about love, that she had misunderstood the signs, that Ron didn't love her.

'Hermione?' called Harry's voice through the night.

She wipped her eyes, trying to hide her face on the pillow.

'Yes, Harry?'

And it will be again the farce, again the indifference.

She had to forget this madness.

One of these days maybe your magic won't affect me
And your kiss won't make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you'll probably always have a spell on me