Big shout out to my beta reader, ShamedinthePuffCommunity. Love you!

BPOV

I pushed through the doors impatiently, needing to be outside. School was too claustrophobic to contain all my emotions right now. Alice's keys jingled cheerily in my hands as I hurried through the parking lot towards her car. I was definitely going to owe her big time for this.

I got to the car and paused, looking at my reflection in the window. My cheeks were flushed and the wind whipped my hair around, but I thought I looked kind of okay. I also looked ridiculously excited, which I was. Giggling hysterically to myself, I got in the car and started it. It roared to life instantly; I backed awkwardly out of the parking space and pulled out of the lot, trying to calm down and concentrate on driving the expensive vehicle.

Okay, Bella, relax. You're fine. Everything's good. It had never ceased to amaze me when boys showed interest. Hanging around the Cullens, all of whom were fantastic-looking, did little to improve my self-esteem. I could never understand why anyone would prefer me over, say, Alice or Rosalie. Not that I thought I was ugly, just…a little plain. Average. There were plenty of other girls prettier than me, and they probably knew what they were doing more than I did too. My experience in the boy department was limited to a few minor flirtations and one semi-serious relationship that had not ended well.

So, when I began to realize that a gorgeous, funny, and truly nice boy maybe, sort of liked me…it made my head spin. We'd been friends first, of course, but lately he'd taken to texting me late at night. It had started off innocently enough, but the messages had become increasingly flirtatious, until last night he finally admitted that he liked me as more than a friend. We'd been texting all morning, and now I was going to see him in person for the first time since he'd said the big L word.

The whole thing made me feel incredible. Texting was easy, because I could think of exactly what I was going to say until it was perfect. We had quite the witty repartee going on. I doubted that I'd be able to do the same in person, but I was sure as hell going to try. I liked him. He was so cute and –

I suddenly noticed that I was driving rather fast. I eased off the accelerator, mentally chiding myself. Edward has been rubbing off on me with his maniacal driving.

Heart in my throat, I turned into his driveway, willing myself not to throw up. There he was, leaning against the front door, hands in his pockets, a huge grin on his face. He waved.

I waved back, wondering how he could be so calm and collected. My phone vibrated. I pressed the button.

Drive you home after school? Hope you finished your paper. It was from Edward.

I turned off the phone and tossed it in the back seat. I felt guilty for keeping the truth from him, but I didn't want to talk about it until I was sure it was real. Alice and Rosalie had understood, though they both told me that it definitely was real after I'd showed them the text messages. I needed reassurance, though, and I couldn't bear the thought of Edward teasing me if it ended up being nothing. I would tell him, eventually.

With one last deep breath, I got out of the car and began walking unsteadily towards the house.

"For a minute there I thought you weren't going to get out of the car. Thought maybe you changed your mind."

I blushed. "I didn't change my mind. How're you?"

"I'm good, now." He was looking directly into my eyes.

I could feel myself blushing again, much to my annoyance, and I found that I couldn't meet his eyes. How could he say stuff that was so directly and obviously romantic and not be at least a little nervous?

I cleared my throat. "Well…good."

He laughed. "Seeing you in person is so much better than texting. I've been looking forward to this."

"Me too." I forced myself to look at his face. Uh oh. That was a mistake. He's smiling, and I immediately have to look down. "So…how's your Dad?" I try again.

"He's good. Same as always. Let's walk." He heads towards a wooded area behind his house and I follow. "How'd you get out of school?" he asks.

"Oh, my friend Alice. She's got connections. You?"

"Doctors appointment."

"Oh really? I wasn't aware that I had gone to med school." Time to stop stuttering like an idiot and bust out some of that witty banter.

"Oh yeah. You did it in half the time. Want to examine me, Dr. Swan?"

"Mmm, sorry, forgot my stethoscope."

"I'll take a rain check."

We were walking through the woods, which he obviously knew well, because he kept veering and turning in different directions. I never knew if we were going to walk straight or turn, so I was stumbling around, probably looking ridiculous. It felt so awkward.

He noticed. "You know," he said, glancing sideways at me and sounding incredibly casual, "it might be easier if I were holding your hand."

So smooth. So perfect. I could feel the corners of my mouth lifting irrepressibly upwards. "How very considerate of you." I offered him my hand and he took it. His grip was firm, and his hand was warm and dry. A physical jolt went through my body when our hands made contact.

He gently tugged at my hand, leading me off to the left. "There's something I want to show you. One of my favorite places. I come here a lot." We'd come to a small cliff, looking down on the beach.

"Careful," he warned, as he started climbing down the rocks in the cliff face. The rocks formed just enough of a ledge that we could sit, completely sheltered from the world above. All I could hear was the water lapping gently at the beach. It was beautiful.

"So…do you take all the girls here?" I teased.

"Nope. Just the special ones that I really like."

"Oh. So me and, like, 50 other girls then?"

"No, you and…well, pretty much just you."

I paused, unsure of how to continue. I could do the flirtation thing when it felt like teasing, but when he made it serious, looking at me like he meant every word he said, the words died in my throat. I settled for looking out at the water. "It's so pretty here."

"Yeah," he agreed. A few seconds later, I felt him flick water into my face.

"Hey!" I squeaked, indignant. I reached forward to splash him back, but he grabbed my arms and held me back. He had fabricated an excuse for us to touch each other, and we went for it, laughing and shoving each other, each battling for dominance. Conveniently, the play-fighting ended a few moments later with me sitting in between his legs, leaning back against him, his arms around my waist.

We were both quiet. I was afraid to move, lest I ruin the perfection of this moment. My heart was racing though, thumping out of control, screaming with the exhilaration of reciprocation.

Later that night, I lay on my bed going over every single, fabulous detail in my head. Perfect perfect perfect. I dug around absent-mindedly in my purse for my phone, thinking that perhaps he had texted me.

Turning it on, it immediately began to vibrate. 6 new messages. 1 missed call. I opened my inbox.

Where are you?

Bella, what's going on?

Why do you have Alice's car?

What exactly is it that you don't want me to know?

Are you ignoring me?

Please call me.

All from Edward. The call was from him too. I cringed. At least Alice and Rosalie had kept my secret. Now I just had to figure out a way to tell him the truth without pissing him off, which was no easy feat. I felt bad being so secretive, especially considering he was my best friend, but this was not something that we talked about. Boyfriends, girlfriends, crushes…we never discussed any of them. Ever since that one night, almost a year ago now…

Suffice it to say, I didn't really know how to bring it up with him. Nor did I want to deal with the endless teasing that Jasper and Emmett would subject me to. I would just talk to him in school tomorrow, I reasoned. Ignoring the twinge of guilt that surged through me, I deleted his messages and dialed Alice's number. She understood. I needed to talk to someone about this, someone who could reassure me that it was all really happening.