Aumanga Daioh Is Not Mine It Belongs To Kiyohiko Azuma
New Azumanga Christmas Tales
By Anime Rebirth
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AR: Christmas time is also a time for families to get to gather for a happy occasion. But for Yomi, it seems to be anything but…….
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(Yomi's Tale)
We see here a close up image of Yomi's face……
Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la. ……
Her eyes appear to have a look of horror as the image starts to back away from her….
Tis the season to be jolly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la…..
She is now seen surrounded by several people at her house…..
Don we now our gay apparel,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
"Get me out of this nightmare." Yomi thought.
Troll the ancient Yule tide carol,
Fa la la la la, la la la la……
"Koyomi dear, why aren't you singing?" Mrs. Mizuhara asked.
Normally Yomi would jump at the chance to sing… even if anyone else found her singing well, less than stellar. But it seems that every year as relatives from near and wide gather for Christmas, she loses more and more of her sanity by the way they behave.
"Yeah cousin, come on, get into the spirit." A boy about Yomi's age said as she gave a whack on Yomi's back.
"Thanks Maero, I wanted someone to give me some pain back there." Yomi said sarcastically.
"Play with me Koyomi." A small girl said.
"No play with me I'm more fun." A small boy that was the same age replied.
It was then that each of them grabbed Yomi's hands and started to pull her back and forth like a tug o war.
"I asked her first Juro." The girl said.
"Well I asked her second Kotone." The boy replied.
Yomi's eyes looked annoyed. "Just what I needed, for the twins to fight over me….again….like every year." she thought.
Yomi managed to get free and quickly head into the kitchen.
"Why hello there my niece." A man said as he walked up to her.
"Oh…hello Uncle Botan." Yomi said nervously. Her Uncle Botan made Kimura look like a saint, in fact this was her Aunt Saika's third husband in 10 years. And each one of her husbands has always tried to come on to her.
"So, how about you give your Uncle a big hug." Botan said as she threw out her arms.
"How about not." Yomi said as she was about to leave the kitchen. But Botan blocked the door.
"Come on we're family." he said as he gave a smirky grin.
Yomi just sighed as he knew how this was going to end. "Okay you asked for it, just close your eyes and get ready for a big surprise." she said.
Botan quickly closed his eyes and puckered his lips.
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WHAM!!!!!
Everyone heard the sound of someone getting a huge uppercut.
"Oh Koyomi not again." Mrs. Mizuhara thought as she and some others headed towards the kitchen.
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When they entered the kitchen they saw Boton passed out on the floor as Yomi had a frustrated look on her face.
Saika just gave Yomi a furious look. "WHY DO YOU KEEP KNOCKING OUT MY HUSBANDS?!!!!"
"WHY DO YOU KEEP MARRYING SUCH PERVS!!!!" Yomi responded as she felt a piece of pie hit her face.
"BULLSEYE!!!!!" A boy that looked about 13 said as he laughed.
"Benjiro, don't play with your food like that." A woman said.
"Sorry mom." Benjiro said.
"That's my baby." The woman said as he hugged her.
"Aunt Hina, you let him get away with murder." Yomi said as she clenched her fists.
"Now Koyomi, don't be such a spoilsport." Hina said.
"Yes, now apologize for punching my Botan." Saika said.
"WHAT?!!!" Yomi screamed. "Mom?"
"Just apologize and we'll talk about it later." Mrs. Mizuhara said as she sweat dropped.
"No way, you tell them something." Yomi said.
"It's not nice to talk back to you mom like that." Saika told her.
"Yes, but then again your mom was never a very confronting person." Hina added.
"THAT IS IT!!!!!" Yomi said as she headed towards her room. "MERRY CHRISTMAS, MAY YOU ALL GET WHAT'S COMING TO YOU!!!" And with that she left.
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Yomi was lying down on her bed as she just stared at the ceiling. "Stupid Family." She thought. "All they ever do is drive me nuts."
She was starting to doze off when there was a knock on the door.
"No one is in here." she said as she turned over.
The door slowly opened. "Koyomi, darling." Mrs. Mizuhara said as she sat next to her. "Are you okay?"
"No mom, I'm not okay, every year I swear they drive me more insane?" she asked.
"Well to be honest, I really can't stand them either." Mrs. Mizuhara added.
"Then why do you put up with them?" Yomi asked in a confused tone.
"Well they're family, and no matter how strange they are, I still love them, that's why I never say anything that would cause any turmoil." She said as she smiled.
Yomi just stared at her. "You sure have a lot of patience." she said as she smiled.
"So come on, join us for some Christmas Presents." Mrs. Mizuhara said with a smile.
Yomi just smiled. "You're something else you know that."
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"Look who decided to join us." Mrs. Mizuhara said as Yomi walked up.
"Hey everyone, sorry for bringing everyone's mood down, I love you all and I hope we can all put our differences aside end enjoy this Christmas." Yomi said as she gave a small smile as then a candy cane struck in her face. "No matter….how…. Lovable they are." She said as she gave a toothy grin to Benjiro.
"Well then should we open presents then?" Mrs. Mizuhara said as all the kids quickly gathered around the tree.
Mrs. Mizuhara gave an excited smile. "Oh Koyomi, let me give you yours first." She said as she looked around the tree. "Strange I know it was here." she said as she continued to search for it.
"Was it the one in gold wrapping?" Hina asked.
"Yes, where is it?" Mrs. Mizuhara asked.
"Well while you were upstairs, there were a group of people outside asking for donations for charity, we decided to give them a gift to give to somebody, hope you don't mind." she responded.
"You gave away Koyomi's gift?" Mrs. Mizuhara asked.
"What's the big deal?" Sakai asked, you could probably get it for her later on.
"But I worked extra jobs to afford it." Mrs. Mizuhara responded. "It was a first edition David Copperfield."
"You mean that book saw at the bookstore, mom that was an expensive novel." Yomi said in a surprised tone.
"So, just get her a cheaper one, it still has the same words." Hina added.
Yomi just looked at the disappointed look on her mothers face. "Mom?"
"You couldn't give one of the other presents away?" Mrs. Mizuhara asked.
"Heck no, those are for us, besides you always seem okay with everything that goes on anyway." Sakai said.
Mrs. Mizuhara slowly looked at the tree, it's lights blinking, the star on top flashing on and off……
Then suddenly…….
She grabbed the tree and threw it across the room.
"MOM?"!!!!" Yomi watched in horror at what had just happened.
The tree hit the radio as the impact caused it to turn on.
"And now for those pf you who may find the holiday time a little frustrated, this song is dedicated to you." The DJ on the radio said as the song starts.
Song Starts: I Won't Be Home For Christmas…
Outside the carolers start to sing
I can't describe the joy they bring
Cause joy is something they don't bring me
Mrs. Mizuhara grabbed Botan… "THIS IS FOR COMING ON TO MY DUAGHTER!!!" And then she gave him a huge uppercut.
My girlfriend is by my side
From the roof are hanging sickles of ice
Their whiny voices get irritating
It's Christmas time again…..
"Your mom has a girlfriend?" Benjiro asked.
"Don't listen to the song." Yomi said as she sweat dropped.
So I stand with a dead smile on my face
Wondering how much of my time they'll waste
Oh god I hate these Satan's helpers
After that verse Mrs. Mizuhara looked at the twins..
"YOU TWO ARE ON SANTA'S NAUGTY LIST FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!!" She screamed.
"Mom, but you just told me…." Yomi started.
"I WAS WRONG!!!!" Mrs. Mizuhara screamed.
And then I guess I must've snapped
Because I grabbed a baseball bat
And made them all run for shelter
"Not a bad idea." Mrs. Mizuhara said as she went to the closet and came out with a baseball bat…
"HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!" She screamed.
"LOOK OUT SHE'S LOST IT!!!!" Hina screamed as they ran all around the living room trying to avoid Mrs. Mizuhara's wrath.
It's Christmas time again
It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand all year
I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer
You people scare me
Please stay away from my home
If you don't wanna get beat down
Just leave the presents and then leave me alone.
It was then that the doors came crashing down and several officers came in.
"OH COME ON ARE WE EVER GONNA HAVE A PEACFUL NIGHT TONIGHT?!!" The officer screamed.
Well I guess it's not cool to freak on Christmas Eve
Cause the cops came and arrested me
They had an unfair advantage
And even though the jail didn't have a tree
Christmas came a night early
Causes a guy named Bubba unwrapped my package (hot damn)
"Just for the record, you don't have anyone named Bubba locked up do you?" Mrs. Mizuhara asked in a nervous tone as the officers took her away.
It's Christmas time again
It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand all year
I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer
You people scare me
Please stay away from my home
If you don't wanna get beat down
Just leave the presents and then leave me alone.
Yomi looked at the living room that was now in shambles.
"Well Koyomi, I think it's time for us to go." Hina said.
"Have a happy new year." Sakai added as she helped Botan up.
Maero gave her a whack on the back. "Kickin' get together, can't wait for next year." He said as they all left.
I won't be home
I won't be home for Christmas
I won't be home
I won't be home for Christmas (please post my bail)
I won't be home
I won't be home for Christmas (please post my bail)
I won't be home
I won't be home for Christmas (please post my bail)
I won't be home
I won't be home for Christmas (please post my bail)
I won't be home
I won't be home for Christmas
"I can't wait." Yomi said sarcastically as she sighed.
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Some time later, Yomi paid Mrs. Mizuhara's bail and they left the police station.
"I'm so sorry sweetheart, I made such an embarrassment of myself." she said.
"Are you kidding, that was awesome, you did to them what I wanted to do." Yomi said.
"But still, you mustn't do things like that. I showed a very bad example for you." Mrs. Mizuhara said with a stern face.
"Yes Mom." Yomi said as she looked at the sidewalk.
"But still you deserve that book." She said. "So tomorrow I'm going to go get it for you." Mrs. Mizuhara said.
"But how, we don't have the money." Yomi responded in a confused tone.
"Well." Mrs. Mizuhara said as she took out a credit card.
"That's…. Aunt Hina's credit card." Yomi said in a shocked tone.
"And your Aunt Sakai is buying us lunch." Mrs. Mizuhara said as she took out another credit card.
"But you just said…." Yomi started.
"Yomi, my dear daughter, those two are the acceptions." Mrs. Mizuhara said as she smirked.
And with that, the two Mizuhara ladies went off to enjoy what was left of the holidays.
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Well as you can see, sometimes even the worst of days can find a happy ending.
But Get ready, for someone is about to Make their Christmas Tales debut, who, well you'll just have to wait and see…..
So until then, take care…..AR
'TILL NEXT TIME!!!!!!