XVIII. Trip to the Spirit World, Part II
They crossed the door into a great hall. The ceiling was not a ceiling, but the sky. A blue, perfect sky, with faultless white clouds, lighted by a beautiful light. However, there was no sun in the firmament. There were columns that rose to the heavens but reached nowhere. A parade of figures could be seen. Some running around, some reclining in long chairs, some eating and drinking, and several around a round table, cheering and looking at something with interest. A game. The Gods were playing a game.
A minor deity noticed them. A small God with the pinched expression of someone that finds that everything smells offensively.
He came over and looked at them trying to figure them out.
"Are you worshipers?" The small God asked.
"It depends." Sokka answered. "What's to worship?"
The small God seemed surprised.
"Well, er, me. I'm a God, I'm revered by worshipers."
Toph couldn't stop herself.
"God of what?"
"God of Small Things."
"I beg your pardon?"
"I'm the God of those small things you usually found laying around the house and don't know what to do with them."
"You mean like annoying buttons, hairpins, pieces of thread and loose copper pieces that keep reappearing even though you keep picking them up?" Katara asked, annoyance in her voice. Obviously, she had a strong opinion about small, useless, little things laying around the house.
"Yes."
"And what do you do for your worshipers, oh God of the Small Things?" Toph asked and sensed the spirit fingers of Aang briefly on her back as a silent warning. Behave.
"Well, I help them find small things." The God with the pinched expression said.
"You mean, if I pray very hard to you I'll find my house full of useless small things that I keep throwing away on cleaning days and that keep re-materializing like five seconds afterwards?" There was no doubt, there was hatred in Katara's voice.
"Well, yes. I'm the God of the Small things, that's the reason I exist."
Zuko knew his clandestine girlfriend well. He grabbed her arm, while bowing deeply to the small God.
"We're deeply honored to meet you, God of the Small Annoying Things. We practice a different religion back home, but we will keep you in mind when there is the need to pray for small things." The God seemed pleased by this demonstration of humility. Zuko dragged Katara away from the God, and the rest followed.
She was mumbling under breath about the disgrace of living with hoarders like Hakoda and Gran-Gran and cleaning the stupid South Pole ten times a day and still finding small stupid things like herring bones and pins everywhere. Zuko solved the problem.
"Shut up or I'll place an icon of the little god in your room when we got back."
The friends got closer to the table were the Gods were engaged in their board game. They looked at the celestial beings in surprise. The Gods were an assorted lot, that was for sure.
"I wonder if Yue is around." Katara said, looking for the Moon Goddess.
The rest of the friends was fascinated by the immortals. Some of the gods were very interesting to look at. Like the one with the head of a jackal, dressed with the equivalent of a linen towel wrapped around his waist and a very snappy necklace made of blue stones that seemed to cover his shoulders and part of his chest. He was talking to a chubby kid with adorable rosy cheeks and wings, that sported a bow and a quiver with arrows at his back. The little kid was putting a cylinder of something in his mouth and was puffing smoke from it. The baby was also talking with a deep and scary baritone, insulting some of the players with a language that would have made Zuko's men proud.
The friends looked at each other.
"Do you know any of these Gods?" Sokka asked in wonder.
"Well, I know Hrish." Mumbled Aang, marginally uncomfortable. "He's the one over there."
"Whoa!" Toph exclaimed. "That's a scary God. Look at all those snakes coming from him, how they move!"
The boys were squinting their eyes. Suddenly, Sokka gasped.
"Those are not snakes, Toph." He said in horror.
"What you mean? I know what snakes look like. I've seen them before with my feet. Look at all those heads."
Sokka tried to step in front of her, so she would stop looking at the God.
"That's a fertility God, Toph." He tried to explain.
Suki was mesmerized.
"Wow." Was all she could say. "Wow."
"Suki!" Sokka scolded "Snap out of it! Right now!" He tried to drag the warrior away.
Zuko was covering Katara's eyes. The only one that was calm and collected was Aang.
"It's only a God." He said shrugging. Toph was impressed. That monk was revealing depths so hidden that she made a mental note of taking diving lessons when back in the real world.
"How do you know that God, Aang?" Sokka asked, offended, trying to get Suki to react. The warrior was mumbling something about worshiping and what do you think will happen if I pray really, really hard?
"That's the God the monks dedicated the festivals to. The Hrish festivals."
"What's a Hrish festiva…" Katara started asking, but Zuko was fast.
"Hey, isn't that Yue?" He asked and she turned. "Ooops, my mistake, sorry. Look over there! Another interesting God! Look, I think that's Hoover, the God of Cleaning Houses! Your favorite!"
Another God, a well formed, good looking, half naked male, with a cup in one hand and a crown of woven flowers in his head, came over. He had a pleasant smile and a sparkle in his eye.
"Do I know you?" He asked Toph, looking at her from head to toe, trying to place her. Toph shook her head.
"Don't think so. Not big on worshiping."
He nodded, studying her.
"My cult is slightly different than the rest. I'm the God of Drinks that Make you Happy and Stupid. I get worshiped every time someone takes a Drink. I've a great following, but I'm usually good at recognizing the naturals."
"What's a natural?"
"Those worshipers that don't take Drinks to drown sorrow, force happiness, buy bravery, and so forth. A natural is a worshiper that enjoys for the sake of enjoyment. I love naturals. My temples are only served by female naturals." He circled her. "I know you. You enjoy. You would do well in one of my temples." She felt Aang's fingers on her back again. Protective and possessive at the same time. The God offered her a drink. "Try my new vintage. It's called Ambrosia. And you, you can call me Dionny."
Toph bowed deeply to the God of Drinks.
"I'm honored but I'm not thirsty. Thank you for the offer, but I have a temple to serve already."
Dionny the God seemed displeased.
"Another temple? You serve another God?" Toph kept her cool, but deep down she was wary. Aang was right, these were arrogant Gods, dangerous for mortals.
"I serve an incarnation. The spirit of the world in human form. The Avatar, who by the way have four temples and not enough worshipers. Hardly any, actually. Maybe only one, and I don't know if it counts because is a lemur. I made a pledge to him. Out of pity."
The God seemed happy with the crazy answer. He did not even asked who the avatar was.
"If you change your mind" Dionny said seductively. "You know where to find me. When you get to see the bottom of any bottle you're drinking, just say my name three times and I shall come. It's all about the taste of the drink, dainty lady."
Toph bowed to the God, who left with languid movements, sipping his drink.
"Don't even think about calling that guy." Aang whispered fiercely in her ear. "I can see it in his eyes, his intentions are not honorable."
"Relax Twinkle Toes." She told him sincerely. "I'm blind in the real world. I can't never see the end of the bottle. And anyway, be assured that that guy is not tasting this dainty."
"That would be something." Aang said without thinking. "Tasting the dainty."
She turned to him in surprise. Aang looked utterly shocked, with a hand on his mouth, and his big, gray eyes on her.
"Which one do you think is the Goddess of Fate?" Zuko asked, sliding closer to them and breaking the moment. Aang blinked, and looked at Zuko. And then a Katara, who had followed closely. And he seemed to realize something, probably about himself, because his face was a poem of shame, confusion and doubt. He suddenly recoiled, stepping aside from Toph and closer to Katara. Toph felt a pang. Like a jab inside, too real to be part of the Spirit World. And suddenly, she got upset.
"Well, we need to do this." She said resolutely, turning her back on her friends and taking a step forward towards the table with the gamblers. If she knew something about gambling, is that Destiny had nothing to do with it. So, it was the ideal place for the Goddess of Providence.
"Fate!" She called aloud. A Goddess with black hair turned her head to her. The Goddess had a couple of dice in her hand, and was surrounded by other deities, all drinking and screaming. It took a moment for Toph to take in that the Goddess was trying to place where her name had come from, and that the Goddess had pale green eyes the color of sea foam that did not focus on anything. The Goddess of Fate was blind.
"Can't you tell I am busy?" She retorted in a bad mood. "I'm kicking these foreigners' butts and I refuse to be interrupted! You!" She turned to another immortal. "Go and check what the mortals want!"
Some minor deity came over.
"Hello worshipers. Are you here for the Gathering?"
"We're here to talk to the Goddess of Fate." Aang answered. "What Gathering?"
"The Celestial Gathering. Gods from everywhere meet every five centuries or so to discuss the affairs of the universe, what's happening with the mortals, who's getting really popular out there, and the best donations. It's an important meeting. Great decisions are made during these meetings."
"Like the game you're playing right now?" Toph asked. She had moved away from Aang, and had decided to go freelance. Enough with the Behave. She didn't like the look in his eyes. He had seemed afraid of the conversation. She thought that it was great to be blind in the real world.
"Well, yes. We are betting on the odds of a Volcano wiping out the entire southern Fire Nation islands."
Zuko breath stopped.
"Is my country going to be wiped out by a Volcano?"
"Maybe, don't know yet. I wouldn't get too worried. Fate is betting against it. She's usually very good at her bets." Zuko was open mouthed. "If you really care about the islands, you need to wait, though. Fate doesn't like to be interrupted and if she bets for it, then you really have a problem."
Toph grabbed Zuko's arm. Katara grabbed the other. Aang put a hand on his shoulder. Toph looked for Sokka, who was needed right now for moral support and saw him trying to drag Suki away. The warrior was still entranced, now on her knees, talking in terms of offerings and sacrifices.
"Hey, guys! I need help here! Suki found religion!" Sokka yelled.
Toph let go of Sparky and went to the warrior. She stepped in front of her and slapped her with a incorporeal slap.
"Suki!" She called. "Snap out of it! If you behave, I'll get you an icon of Hrish for you to use as a bookmark for your Kyoshi Code."
Suki made an effort to avert her gaze.
"You promise?" Her eyes were still trying to focus.
"Yes. You need to clean your chin. Your drooling is making your make-up run." The warrior stood up reluctantly to follow Toph. The friends stood closer to the table. The smaller deity was looking at them with interest.
"So, who do you guys worship?" The God asked. That was a loaded question. As an expert in not doing religion, Toph understood that if there is something that can get you cursed faster than stepping on the toes of a witch, is to openly declare your religious alliances or misalliances in a room full of Gods (or worshipers, whatever).
"Depends." She answered elusively.
"Depends on what?" The God asked.
"Depends on the problem I'm trying to solve." She answered. Other Gods came closer. The Jackal and the foul mouthed Baby, for the look of it.
"That's a good attitude." Acknowledged the original deity. "You never know which God out there is willing to help."
"Are we talking about polytheism again?" The Jackal seemed bored. "That was so last Gathering."
"It makes sense. The Monotheists have been getting a lot of rep, lately." The smoking Baby said.
Another immortal sauntered. This one was female, with long legs and a sultry form. Her hair fell on cascades at her back, and she sported a breathtaking face. She was eating grapes, and wearing a dress so transparent that Toph could see the grapes going down her digestive track. She wished for blindness again.
"Those guys are boring." The Goddess said, giving Sokka an eyeful. Suki snorted. "They are big on Sin." Zuko was carefully maintaining eye contact with the Goddess. Even without bending in the Spirit World, he was sweating, firebending his will to be able to keep his gaze at eye level. Aang was scrupulously looking at a point past her shoulder, his ears purple. Toph thought for a minute there that she saw the ears flapping. Maybe a trick of the light. Sokka, not burdened by aristocratic education or religious upbringing, however, was openly denying the exercise of any self restraint.
"I thought you were big on Sin, Tlatli." The Baby was saying.
"Yes, I promote Sin. Those Monotheist Gods, they prohibit it. They totally refuse to share the love."
An austere looking tall God, all beard and disapproval, approached the group.
"Mortals!" The God ordered. "Don't pay attention to these gods, these are false gods."
"As opposed to? They look very real to me." Sokka ventured.
"Us." The God signaled himself, and another couple of deities, all with the same judgmental expressions. "We are the real gods. This is what religion is all about, who are the real Gods and who is worshiping false ones."
"I thought all Gods were like, OK." Sokka said, confused.
"That's what they want you to think, but we all know that We are the real Gods and the rest are False. That's the way it is."
Sokka kept looking at Tlatli. Toph could tell that right now, the False Naked Goddess looked much more religious to him than the forbidding hairy guy. But then, theology had never been Sokka's forte.
"But, how can it be that you promote sin and you guys prohibit it, and you all share the same space?" He asked, almost in pain.
"You never know what's going to get you the bigger following." The Jackal said.
Tlatli assented.
"Mortals are funny. You would think that they would go after religions that celebrate pleasure, drinking, sin and laziness. But they don't. Lately, the Monotheists are getting a huge following and they forbid everything."
"That's what makes us the True Gods while you guys are the False ones. We're hardcore. Winning the afterlife with us is hard work. That makes it so much more valuable." The True God said.
"It's the same afterlife, God." Tlatli said tiredly. "You're selling the same dumpling with different steam."
The Baby puffed some smoke.
"It used to be that prohibiting things would make all your followers ran away. So we allowed things. But that didn't work. Humans seem to like religions that advocate misery."
"Broccoli." Said the Jackal with melancholia. "I got a huge following declaring Broccoli an abomination. I was so popular for a while."
"Well," the True God crossed his arms with an evil grin. "Next thing we are prohibiting is chocolate."
The mortal girls gasped, horrified in the face of so much malevolence. Sokka turned to Zuko and whispered: Are you still accepting investors for those chocolate ventures? The underground sales of that thing are going to skyrocket now.
The Baby, meanwhile, was looking at Katara up and down.
"You know, mortal," he said in his deep baritone, suggestively, "I'm the God of Love."
She looked at the Baby like if he was a Fire Nation snail-roach.
"No offense, but how can you be the God of Love? You are a cute baby! That is like, so wrong." She said between disgusted and shocked. Toph looked at Katara with surprise. The nerve of the Waterbender, like that ever stopped her before.
"Women go ga-ga with Babies. They feel so much love when they see Babies. I'm utterly loved and I give love in return. I'm very handy. And I can fly, you see, I've wings." He did a flying demonstration. Toph had had enough.
"Quit it, Baby-love." She told the cherub. "You don't have the edge of novelty. See, my friend's been there, done that." Toph turned to walk to where Fate was to talk to her. Someone with incorporeal fingers grabbed her arm. It was Aang. She removed her arm with a brusque movement. "You've some fierce competition Twinkle Toes. Better watch out." She told him over her shoulder and walked away. He followed.
"What's wrong?" Aang asked when they were out of earshot from the others.
"You tell me what's wrong." Toph shot back. "You acted for a minute there like I was something to be disgusted at." He lowered his gaze for a moment, but then raised it resolutely.
"No. Not to be disgusted at. To be hopeful for. And I got scared about how much I liked the idea."
Toph raised an eyebrow.
"Are we talking about the dainty?" She clarified with a frown, just to be sure.
"The exquisite, pretty dainty, yes." He spelled out. She was surprised. What was up with the monk? Like Kuei. She made a mental note to ask Gran-Gran about the psychological effects of the South Pole's horrible grub.
"Keep looking at the dainty like is daunting, and you will get the full flavor of a slap in the face." She answered just to remind him who she was. But she suddenly felt happy again. Her anger disappearing like magic. He seemed to read between the lines as well, because suddenly he smiled a child-man shy smile.
They then heard a triumphal scream. They turned to the gambling table. Fate was jumping with the dice in her hands.
"Take that, suckers!!" She yelled happily. "Pay up, pay up!" The other deities started unloading incorporeal stuff, like strands of silver in her hands. The rest of the group approached Toph and Aang, followed by the Gods that have been discussing theology.
"What's going on?" Aang asked the minor deity that Fate had sent originally to talk to them.
"Good news for your islands." The God told Zuko. "Fate won. No Volcano eruption." Zuko seemed disgusted, but had the common sense not to say anything.
"What's that they are giving her?" Katara asked.
"Devotion. Gods trade in their worshiper's devotion. Devotion gives Gods powers." The Jackal answered. Toph heard that and knew that the entire concept was just so wrong.
After cashing in her devotion, Fate strolled towards the mortals. Toph looked at her in wonder. This was not how she had imagined the Goddess. Fate did not look like a divine immortal. She was average height, not tall like the rest, slim, with black hair piled on top of her head, and had the same cylinder of paper that Baby-love was carrying between her fingers. She brought it to her lips and puffed a column of smoke. There were no senses in the spirit world, but Toph could still smell the acrid smoke.
Fate acknowledged the other Gods with a gesture.
"What's up Tlatli? How is the adultery business?" She asked blowing smoke in the face of the naked goddess. Tlatli smiled a wan smile.
"Better than ever. Since the Monotheists started gathering all their followers, adultery levels have skyrocketed."
The friends looked at each other in horror.
"I thought you were the Goddess of Love or something!" Sokka said disapprovingly.
"He's the God of Love," Tlatli clarified pointing at the lecherous Baby that was totally checking Katara out. "I'm the Goddess of Adultery and Lust. I'm pretty good at it." She added, a hand on her hip. Suki stepped between the Goddess and Sokka. The Goddess smiled at Suki. "I'm not a threat, honey. I don't do steady relationships." Suki was not budging. Toph thought that Suki and Sokka were being attacked by religion.
Fate turned to the mortals.
"Hello. I'm Fortuna, née Fortunata (but you can imagine what I think of that name). I'm the Goddess of Destiny. Mortals called me by several names. Among them, Providence, Chance, Luck, and B--. My friends call me Fate." She blew smoke on their faces, appreciating them with a blind stare. Aang cringed, and tried not to cough. The rest braved the smoke barely flinching. The way she would move her head would seem like that she was taking all in, sensing them. "Well, what do we have here? If it isn't my old friend the Avatar. My very good friend."
"Do I know you?" Aang asked bewildered. Fate tapped his chest with her nicotine stained fingers.
"You did. Very well." She smiled a … lascivious? smile. Toph heard Katara snorting, Sokka tried to keep a chuckle back and she herself tried to rein in … what? Jealousy? Like she was allowed or something? "That was some lives ago, you probably don't remember anything." Fate seemed sad, somehow. She then shook her head, and continued with her inspection. "Hey!" She seemed pleased to recognize someone else in the group. "Agni's kid! How are you doing? Look at you all grown up and everything. How is life treating you? Am I making it too hard for you? Do you think I overdid it a bit?" She sounded honest, so against all advice Sokka said:
"You certainly were not going for subtle with him."
Fate turned to look at Sokka mildly amused.
"Agni's kid, you got yourself a friend. So I cannot have done so bad if you managed to get this …" She studied Sokka hard, "… person's loyalty." Was all she could come up with. She turned to Katara.
"A Master Waterbender?" Her smile became brittle. "With your covenants with my son. How is that working for you?"
"I beg your pardon?" Katara asked, confused.
"My son, La. The Ocean. You know him, your Tribe is like his favorite pet project."
Katara coughed.
"Actually, we are trying to locate the Spirit of the Ocean. Your … son?"
Fate blew smoke on her face, considering something.
"You're here for other reasons, Waterbender. We can talk about it later." Fate turned to Suki. "I've nothing on you. You're a nice girl, hard worker, moron boyfriend. Happens all the time. You'll be happy. Ah, and don't bury the Code. Kyoshi will haunt you. Brave it, like your predecessors did." Fate finally stepped in front of Toph. They were exactly the same height. Toph also noticed that they had the same built. The Goddess blew smoke on Toph's face. The mortal did not flinch.
"Nasty habit." She told the Goddess.
"I know." The Goddess was smiling, pleased. "Walk with me." Fate said and started walking away. Toph followed. The rest remained where they were, looking at them. "I don't hate you." Fate said straight on, when they were out of earshot. "Actually, I like you. A lot. So much, that I go out of my way for you." Toph was surprised.
"You like me?"
"Yes. Why else do think you're blind? I blessed you. You're my Chosen One." Toph got scared. She knew about Chosen Ones. Yin read her a story once about an entire race that was the Chosen People of a God and the amount of woe and misery in the story was never ending. Being the Chosen One of a God did not sound like the hottest job offer. "Don't be scared, I don't want you to proselytize for me or to go around preaching my sacred word. I don't like prophets too much. They tend to be too 'one track mind' for my taste."
"Then, what's with the luck? Because lately, it sucks."
"It's not your fault, really. You're so awesome, with all the blessings I bestowed upon you, that that stupid King fell in love, got my son involved in the story and then everything went south." Fate stopped, turned to face her and threw smoke at her face again.
"I'm lost, Goddess Fortuna."
"Please, call me Fate. What's going on in your life right now, I didn't exactly planned it. You see, I don't plan. I guide. Also, I'm all-knowing but not ever-knowing. That's a problem." Toph opened her focused eyes. Was there even a difference? "There is." Fate answered, not even bothering to disguise that she was reading her thoughts. "Don't want to get into details right now, though. Main issue is, I was doing nicely, giving you some challenges to keep the entire exercise interesting, working hard in getting you some sexy action with a deserving boyfriend (you're my Chosen One, you deserve an Awesome Boyfriend), and then, bam! a boomerang. I miscalculated, and your sheer amazingness got you a King. And the King got La involved."
Fate blew smoke in the air, away from her face now.
"I'm not what mortals think I am. I like you because I know you. You see, I know everything about men silly, petty secrets and I keep them. I intervene when I have to. Or when I'm bored. Or when I'm losing my games. I'm sorry about Agni's kid face, by the way. I was on a losing strike and lost my temper a bit and kind of messed up. But I made it up to him. Without that scar, he would have never joined your group or that hunky Avatar. He would be another good looking, arrogant, boring prince. I'm big on humble pies, I usually throw them at people's faces. So, everything is well that's end well. And anyway, without that scar he wouldn't have his waterbender either, and believe me, I know passion, those two steam together. I am getting hot just by looking at them right now. When they went back together a couple of days ago we were all like Hurrah!! over here in the pantheon. Some Gods went down to earth to get fireflakes and everything for the show. We really missed all that swamp action, I'm telling you. That's a good couple to watch in the throes of passion so we set up some chairs and some picnic blankets and kept giving them opportunities like well positioned closets and stuff." Toph raised her hand.
"Fate, I really don't want to hear this."
"Don't be such a prude. That monk is rubbing on you. We need to fix that. Seriously. Tlatli won like a thousand bets with those two. Anyway, I'm rambling. What I wanted to say was, it's not like I'm working against you or anything, but my son is. You see, we have a difficult relationship my son and I. He thinks I can do magic and control Destiny. I can't. I guide. People and Gods make choices. And every choice they make closes a thousand doors and opens a thousand more. La thinks that eternity is like a mystery scroll where you can jump to the end and read the conclusion before reading the story. He's sorely mistaken." Fate seemed comfortable, even happy about sharing all this heartache with Toph. Toph listened, like a good sounding board. "Maybe it's my fault. I should have been more careful about his father. It was in a Gathering, millenniums ago. This foreign God came to visit and I lost it. Big guy, lickable horns, long hair, a big fork and the meanest fish tail I had ever seen. I just couldn't get enough of the fish. And a century later, lo and behold. La. My son. Who keeps complaining because he looks like a Fish. I think he's beautiful, but he thinks I'm just saying it because I'm his mother."
Fate blew smoke again, and turned her blind face to Toph. A thought struck Toph.
"Why is it that I can see in the Spirit World and you can't?"
"Oh, I can see. I just don't see with my eyes. It's like what you do back in the real world. I sense. You can see here because there is no bending in the Spirit World. When I realized you were crossing over I thought it would be a nice gesture for you to see in this world, instead of leaving you like you've been for the last week in the ice pole. No bending and not seeing. I thought that you were going through too much crap already." Fate smiled at her. "Deep down, I'm a romantic too. You're taking home some hot blue memories."
Fate turned and started walking towards the rest of the friends again.
"Let's go back. You guys still need to see some people." She was saying. Toph ran to keep up with her pace.
"Listen Fate, is not like I don't appreciate the love or anything, but in the future, can you lay low with the blessings?"
Fate stopped.
"The blessings are all yours already, pet." She said behind a cloud of smoke. "You're the one who keeps upping the ante, not me. Now, if what you want is an assurance that everything is going to be OK in the end, I can't give it. It's like jumping ahead in the scroll. That's the reason I don't do prophecies either. Some Gods are big on prophecies. They like giving snippets of the future, that are invariably taken out of context, causing disappointment. Not my cup of Ambrosia. I'm all-knowing, I know what's coming, but I'm not telling. You may choose a different door. And then you get a different future. I don't know what you're going to do, I only know the one thousand permutations that may come from your actions." She started walking and then stopped suddenly. She turned to Toph. "Whatever you choose to do, however, get some of that monk. Those tattoos are lickable. That's the only snippet of the future I'm going to give you."
Toph studied Fate.
"You're saying that because you think I deserve some sexy action with the hot monk, not because that's going to be good for my future or anything."
"You see? You're my Chosen One!" Fate blew smoke again and reached the friends. "So, mortals, here is the deal. My son La takes that silly Contest very seriously. He's upset because he thinks that I could have stopped his girlfriend Tui from cheating and eventually dying. No way I, or anyone else, could stop the consequences of Tui's own actions. She heard a prophecy about herself, she believed it, she got herself a replacement as the good professional that she was, and then she died. La is sad about that. Then, he's also very interested in our earthbending friend here. So he's taking it personal. He got upset when he found out that the Avatar was refusing to champion the King because my son is convinced that marrying the King will make the earthbender miserable. And that's what he wants." Fate turned her face to Toph. "The Contest must go on. If it doesn't, he will kill you and punish the Tribes." Fate waved her hand and something shiny and silver appeared. A parchment, with very peculiar lettering. "Here is the covenant between the water tribes and my son." She handed the document to Aang. "You should review it. It's written in indestructible parchment unless declared invalid. It will become solid and readable when you go back to the real world." Aang looked at the document.
"I know a law school drop out that may be able to help me with this." He told Fate. She nodded.
"I also know that you mortals want to talk to La. It won't help. But it may help you understand."
Fate waved her hand and a soft white light filled the place. Someone was coming from above.
"Yue!" Sokka exclaimed, for the first time removing his gaze from Tlatli.
Yue was a beautiful Goddess. Even with the towering hairdo of too much silver hair to be plausible, she had the sweetest smile that Toph had seen since stepping in the Spirit World.
"Sokka" The Goddess called, and her voice was like two voices at the same time, layering on top of each other. She hovered close to the water tribe warrior, and an incorporeal hand came closer to touch his face, but then she stopped. She turned to Suki with understanding, and instead of touching the warrior, the Moon bowed to the mortal. Suki bowed back, but there were spirit tears pooling in those huge eyes of hers. There was a conversation going on between the Moon and the Kyoshi, that much was evident. They kept looking at each other, an array of expressions flickering while one asked questions and the other answered. Sokka was not part of the conversation. He was gone, looking at his Lost Moon. The Moon turned to him again.
"I'm happy you're fine Sokka. I'm glad you found happiness." She said, with warmth glowing in that beautiful face of hers. Those Water Tribes, Toph thought, they like cornered the market on good looking genes. A golden light was coming down after the silver light. A male god, with black hair and golden eyes materialized, stepped closer to the Moon and grabbed her hand. Yue made a gesture to the group. "This is Agni, the god of Fire and the Spirit of the Sun." She introduced.
Suki jaw dropped.
"Oh, by Kyoshi, you look like …?"
"I took the form of the mortal who saved me from the Ocean." The god said in a raspy, deep voice, that sounded like something broken and mended. "To honor him. I used to look differently. I also made him the first Fire Sage. His descendants have ruled the Fire Nation islands 'till today." The god was looking with pride at Zuko, who was frozen in place. Katara pushed him, nudging his back. It's another grandpa, Zuko, go give him a hug. She was saying. Toph shook her head. The Waterbender touchy feeling-ness knew no boundaries, obviously.
Sokka was still trying to rein the physical likeness in.
"You look like Zuko would without his scar." He told the god, in disbelief.
Toph couldn't help herself.
"So, your ex the Moon, is technically dating Zuko now?" She asked.
"This is a nightmare." Sokka said.
Zuko grabbed Sokka's arm and forced him to turn to him.
"Sokka!" He called his friend's attention sternly. "Look at me, look at me. Here, in my eyes. I'm over here. I'm your friend. That one over there, that's another guy. I'm not the one doi.., sorry, dating your ex-girlfriend." Sokka nodded, still trying to grasp the concept.
Agni was smiling bemused.
"Prince." He called Zuko good humored. "We need to talk about your language back on the real world. Every time you curse, you tickle me. You're my descendant, I can always hear the calls of my descendants. And lately, you've been tickling me non stop. What's going on?"
"The South Pole, that's what's going on." Toph answered for Zuko.
Fate intervened, interrupting the conversation.
"Yue, Agni, the mortals are here to see my son. You're going to take them to him. You can always talk along the way." She turned to Zuko. "You wanted to talk to me, Agni's kid. Let's go." She stopped for a moment. "Waterbender, come, I guess you should be part of this conversation."
Fate walked away with Zuko and Katara. Aang was looking at them thoughtfully.
"What's going on, Toph?" He asked her without using any nickname. He was serious. Toph hated lying to people's faces. She particularly hated lying to his face.
"They had a vision together in the Foggy Swamp and they want to understand what was it that they saw." She answered truthfully.
"Was it a bad vision? Something bad is going to happen?"
"May be. You'll have to ask them." Toph moved away. She had kept her acute hearing in the Spirit World and picked up part of the conversation.
"I don't do prophecies precisely for this reason" Fate was saying. "There is too much room for interpretation. I've no idea what that silly tree tried to tell you. That tree likes math. He dwells in that swamp doing math all day, playing with logical permutations, getting funny in the head and throwing away visions like they are candy. All I can tell you is that your interpretation may be wrong. Who knows? You know about this, Agni's kid, destiny is a funny thing. You know that the visions others have for you do not necessarily dictate the decisions you have to make."
"You sound like my Uncle."
"I know your Uncle. He came to visit, trying to convince me to change the past. He then learned the futility of such endeavor."
"My uncle is a wise man."
"No. A wise man knows everything, but a shrewd one knows everybody. Your uncle is shrewdness incarnate. Changing the topic here. You. Waterbender. I'll give you a clue: taking chances is absolutely necessary for a happy life. And just because I won today, and I'm feeling generous, I'll give you both another hint: Don't force things to fit your vision. Start doing what's right and then the meaning of your vision will reveal itself to you." Fate blew more smoke in their faces and walked back to where the rest were.
"Bye, bye kids." She saluted everyone, going back to her game table. "Say hello to my son for me." She stopped before turning to look at Toph. "You'll see me again, when the time is right." And with that she was gone, a cloud of smoke lingering behind her.
"Doesn't she remind you of someone?" Katara asked Toph.
"Who? Fate? No. She is sarcastic, crabby and with a twisted sense of humor. I don't know anyone like that. I don't want to know anyone like that."
"Do you remember that bit about self deception you were accusing me of?" Katara started, but Toph ignored her, turning to the other gods.
Agni and Yue had stayed hovering closer to the mortals, waiting for them. The mortals turned and bowed farewells to the other gods. Suki tried to place Hrish in the middle of the party just to say goodbye, but the god was nowhere to be seen.
They then started walking after the other two deities. They found themselves walking down a long corridor of columns, with the blue sky still as the ceiling. Beyond the columns there was a forest, with what seemed like figures drifting among the trees. Lingering, waiting for something. Yue lagged behind to walk next to Katara and the girls, to catch up, while Zuko went ahead with Aang and Sokka, talking to his patron god. Toph could hear Sokka asking questions to Agni: So why is it that your race of firebenders can get burned? Isn't that like a design flaw? I mean, creating guys that throw fire but can get burned by fire? I'm an inventor, I think a lot about these things.
"So, how long have you and Agni been together?" Katara asked casually.
Yue smiled.
"Well, the entire situation was kind of waiting for me. At the beginning it was just part of the job description, but now is different. I care about Agni and La. Both of them."
"Is it true that La drowns Agni every night when the sun sets?" Toph asked.
"Yes and no. Every night Agni goes to visit La, to see if he's OK. They used to be best friends before Tui got confused. She was with La and one day, she wanted Agni too. And the entire thing happened. La is not a bad guy. Just emotionally intense. I like him a lot. So we are both trying, Agni and I, to help him work out his issues. You need to understand that time is different for the Gods. For La, Tui just died. Agni, on the other hand, feels as if it happened long time ago."
"And you?"
"I missed Sokka so much at the beginning. But now I'm happy. I wish La would come around, he can be really sweet when he wants to." Yue tilted her head towards Aang. "How are things with the Avatar? He has grown."
"They're fine." Katara answered and it hit Toph that with everything that was going on, Katara and Aang were still officially engaged.
"I see you're wearing the same necklace you were wearing years ago. Didn't the Avatar carved a new one for you?"
"That's a Northern Tribe custom, Yue, not Southern. I never heard of it before traveling to the North Pole."
"Ah. Your prince is looking fine too. I like him better with hair."
"He's not my prince."
"I'm a Goddess now, Katara. I see everything." Yue said sweetly. They guys ahead suddenly stopped. They had reached the end of the corridor. Beyond there was an opening, like the entrance of a cave. The Moon floated ahead next to Agni, and together they went inside. The mortals followed.
The cave opened to what it looked like a underground lake. A green, phosphorescent light that was coming from the lake illuminated everything from below. The walls of the cave twinkled with what looked like thousand little stars. Yue and Agni drifted on top of the lake, calling.
"La, you've visitors La!" Yue moved her hands and bended the water, parting it. Katara was impressed. Yue was not a bender when she was mortal, but now she was the embodiment of bending.
The water moved, and suddenly, a huge blue Koi fish raised from the water. The Spirit of the Ocean flapped his tail while floating to where the other two, very good looking gods were. It was hard to know the mood of the Ocean, Toph realized, because it's really, really hard to read the facial expressions of a fish. The Koi looked at the mortals. The cold beady eyes of the fish stopped at Aang.
"Avatar." He said with a watery voice. "It's good to see you again. Welcome to my abode." The fish eyes stopped at Sokka and Katara, and he bowed his head. The Water Tribe mortals did the same. He then bowed to Suki and finally the fish looked at Toph. He said nothing. She held the gaze, wishing for the umpteenth time that she was blind again and not dealing with the annoyance of looking at body language. She was starting to hate the seeing thing.
"Why did you try to kill me?" Toph asked. The fish hovered above the water.
"The Contest is tradition. Traditions must be respected." The Fish answered.
"There is no tradition of championing wimpy kings. You were making a statement back there."
"I was sending a message. I want all of you to take this seriously." The Fish said with finality, and tried to turn.
"What's your problem?" Toph asked impulsively, before Aang fingers at her back were able to stop her.
The Fish turned to her, again. Aang stepped forward, and placed himself between the fish and Toph.
"Honorable La." He said bowing. "My friend is upset about the entire situation. There must be a way for us to talk about this and find a more reasonable solution."
The fish drifted towards Aang.
"Avatar, I respect you and all your souls. I respect your anger too. And I know that is not your intention to slight me. Your covenant with the Earth King is one thing. The covenant of the Tribes with me is another. I give them life, Tui gave them bending, they give shelter to our mortal forms and worship us. The Water Tribes know that I like certain things done a certain way. There is no other reasonable solution. The Contest must go on."
"What happens if Master Bei Fong rejects the winner?"
"She dies." The Spirit said simply. "You know that."
"I need an assurance that she won't die before the end. You cannot threaten her life every time you think the Contest is not going the way you want." The Fish seemed pleased, if such thing was possible for a fish.
"You have my word." He said. Toph was not happy, however.
"I want to talk to you." She said to the Spirit, talking over Aang's shoulder, whom was still covering her from the gaze of the fish. "Alone."
She heard a gasp. Yue and Agni came close to where they were. Aang turned to face her, a painful expression on his face.
"Toph." He was stern. "You promised."
"I'll behave. But I need to talk to koi here alone. He cannot kill me, he just gave his word on that."
"He can do other things to you, all of them horrible. Death is not the worse that can happen."
She held his gaze, and thought that if they were in the real world this tug of war would be based on her feeling his emotions, not seeing them. And even though she was really taken by his charming face, she preferred feeling his emotions. They were truer. She found seeing truly deceiving.
"I need to do this." She said lowering her eyes and her voice to almost a whisper. "I cannot let a fish push me around like that. I won't do anything stupid."
Aang seemed pained again.
"You won't be able to help it." He said almost imploringly. She pushed him softly, beckoning him to move, and her actions were final. She leaned and tip toed a bit to whisper in his ear.
"My life, my choice." She said, and moved towards the Fish.
The Fish seemed amused. It made a gesture to Yue and Agni, as if he was sending them out with the mortals.
"You gave your word." Aang said.
"I promise you Avatar, no harm will come to the mortal." He repeated. The other four seemed really upset. What are you doing, Aang? She heard Zuko. Leaving her alone with La? You know her! And Katara. Toph can make him break his vow! Aang voice was also final. We need to respect her decision. She needs to do this for herself. Toph doesn't run away, she faces fear. She wondered when was it that Twinkle Toes had started to know her so well. The friends walked towards the entrance of the cave.
Toph walked to the edge of the lake to face the Fish. The Fish floated on top of the water, close to her, making ripples with the tips of his tail. Again, she felt smell. It was not the acrid smoke of Fate, but the fishy salty smell of aquatic life.
"Why are you so unhappy?" She asked the Spirit. The Spirit moved like dancing, balancing his entire body.
"She died before we could sort it out. We won't ever be able to sort anything now."
"Then, give Yue a chance. She likes you."
"She's with Agni. They hold hands all the time. You've seen Agni." She remember Fate's comments about her son.
"You're a God. You can assume a different form. Agni says that he was different."
"He was an imposing God with seven hands, two heads and three legs. He had seven fiery tongues to lick sacrificial butter, and used to ride a ram, branding an axe, torch, prayer beads and a flaming spear." Toph thought about gentle Yue with the big blue eyes, and understood that Agni was anything but stupid. "I don't want another form. I am what I am." Toph was starting to lose her patience. Ocean was one of those guys that always found a reason to mope.
"So, you're fish. So what?" She started, hands on her hips. "This is a Water Tribe Moon we are talking about. These people eat ocean kumquats and crawlies from the bottom of the ocean. She can stomach a fish. You can get some perfume or something to fix your breath problem, you're a God. And if not, she grew up smelling rotten seafood. I'm sure that she'll be TOTALLY into you. So the other guy is better looking, so what? Take it from a blind person: good looks are distracting and deceiving. Snap out of this funk, Fish, is not good for anyone."
The Koi hovered a littler closer.
"You remind me of my mother." He said ominously.
"Good."
"I hate my mother."
"Bad. I think I'm leaving now." Toph turned to leave, but the Fish cut her retreat fast.
"I've been watching you. You're like her. You sit on the sidelines and let things happen. She thinks you're the most entertaining mortal around right now. I think she's right. I want to see you entertained. She would like that." The Fish was almost on top of her. Toph held her ground. Dammed it if she was about to let a smelly fish intimidate her. Nor that she wasn't, intimidated that was, but the fish didn't know that.
"So, this entire personal interest you have in me is some unresolved momma issue, is it? You're a petty and immature fish. And so just you know, the word out there is that you're so ugly, that Koh gave you your face back!" The Fish flinched.
"You are going to be soo miserable." He promised. She held the beady eyes.
"You're getting emotionally involved. You're going to make a mistake. You've too much repressed energy inside you. If you were a smart fish, you would get yourself the form of a Water Tribe warrior and start holding Yue's other hand. Maybe even Agni's. He looks like he wouldn't mind. Hey, I bet that he may even welcomed it. You're so focused on me and your mother because you don't have a life. Get one." She turned on her heels to leave, and then thought about the value of well placed advice. "That hunky Water Tribe warrior out there, he was Yue's boyfriend back when she was a mortal. That's form for you."
She walked determinedly to the entrance of the cave, refusing to turn to look at the fish. Her friends were there, waiting for her.
"What happened?" Katara asked, hugging her. "La is watching you."
"The Fish hates me. If he had any doubts about it before, I just made it official. We should be going." Yue and Agni floated closed by.
"Let's get you back to Hei Bai" Yue said sadly. Agni seemed in a better mood.
"La seems interested." He said smirking. Darn, the god was really good looking. "He hasn't been interested in anything in a while. He's looking at you very intently." He added, nodding to Sokka. Sokka was surprised and turned to look at the monster Fish with a raised eyebrow, raising his chin in a silent 'What's up?' salute.
"Which way to Hei Bai?" Toph asked. The Moon drifted towards a new corridor that just appeared. Agni drifted towards her and held her hand again. The two Spirits hovered forward, leading the way.
"They look cute together." Accepted Suki.
"And Agni, he seems to be big on Public Displays of Affection." Katara mentioned casually.
"That's probably the fault of the Water Tribe Moon he's dating." Zuko mumbled darkly. "I bet she's all over him, driving him crazy asking him to hug her and everyone he meets."
"He's not complaining."
"Those Water Tribe Moons, they have wiles." He retorted. Sokka was looking at them too. He seemed sad and wistful.
Aang, meanwhile, was walking next to Toph. He seemed worried.
"What did you do? Did you insult La and made sure that he would take this personally?"
"Well, yes. But I also gave him some very good advice. He may take it. If he does, he may feel charitable." She added. Aang shook his head.
"I have to champion Kuei, do you understand that?" He asked full of frustration. "The honor of the Avatars forces me to do this. How am I going to protect you if I need to make sure that he wins you?"
"No one is winning me. I'm not a raffle prize."
"Toph, you need to take this seriously."
"I do. There are no assurances, Fate told me. But I also know us. And I know you. You're the luckiest person in the world. Whatever Fate may say, things always fall into place for you. If you want something really hard, it would fall into place." She gave him a reassuring smile. He did not return it. He crossed an arm around her shoulders instead. The ultimate gesture of comfort, but there was something else underneath, in the way his open incorporeal fingers grabbed her arm.
When they reached Hei Bai, the Panda was sitting in the middle of the desolate golden landscape. There was someone standing next to the Bear. A Water Tribe woman with the saddest beauty that Toph had seen since reaching the Spirit World. Katara and Sokka gasped.
"Mom!!" Katara cried and ran towards the ghost. Sokka ran as well. They both hugged their mother, who seemed even more insubstantial than everything else in the place. The siblings were openly crying, calling the woman 'mom, mom' over and over again. The woman raised a hand to get them to hush.
"Shush, cubs, shush." She said sweetly. She touched their faces. "I can only stay one moment." She smiled. "I wanted to see you and let you know that I'm always with you. It's not bad in the Pure Lands, I promise. And they let me visit you at night, when you're sleeping. I come in your dreams, and give kisses to your souls. But now I want you to look at me. Look at me and promise me that you'll be happy. Promise me that you'll laugh at every opportunity. Promise me that you'll sing lullabies to your children. I never got the chance to say goodbye, my cubs. I came today to say goodbye." Katara embraced her mother tighter, now that she was fading. "You need to finish this voyage without me, my cub. We'll see each other in the Pure Lands." And with that, the mother was gone, but the pain remained. The siblings hugged each other for balance and comfort, and the panda bear nuzzled them with his snout.
.
0o0o0o0o0o0o
.
They were back in the real world, on the island. Toph was walking without shoes, her boots in her hands, communing with her element before having to climb back on Appa and go back to the South Pole. She rubbed the earth with her toes, happy to be blind again, and to be able to see with her feet. She was happy she understood about colors now. She was happy she knew about how smiles looked, and she was happy she got to see Twinkle Toes tattoos. But she was even happier to feel everything again, instead of seeing. Seeing with eyes was not right. It was unnatural.
The others walked to where she was, to get her to let go of the earth and in Appa. She could see them and feel them, their movements, their feelings, even their expressions.
"You know guys?" She said stopping, drawing circles in the earth with her toes. "I know I screwed badly in this trip, and that we are all going to face doom because of me, and that I probably just condemned myself to a life of misery and despair, but even then I am happy because I got to see your faces. All of your beautiful, crazy, stupid faces."
Aang helped her climb on Appa. He took the reins this time. When Appa took off, she heard Sokka say:
"Nothing like a trip to the Spirit World to cure you from religion."
.
.
.
A/N. Celestial cameos in this fanfic:
The Dragon Gods or Dragon Kings: In Chinese Mythology these are the gods who rule rivers and oceans, and protect mortals. The legend of the four dragons is beautiful. They sacrificed themselves for the human race. No, they never ate humans and they are not vegetarians. I made that up. They are usually represented in anthropomorphic form, riding dragons.
Dionny: This is Dionysus, the Greek god of wine. The Roman Bacchus. His female worshipers, the Maenads were famous party girls, inspired and frenzied. And NO, he does not show up just because you reached the bottom of the bottle of tequila and keep calling his name. Other things are going to show up at that point, but Bacchus is probably not one of them.
Baby-Love: The Greek Eros, called Cupid by the Romans. Who is kind of a mystery to me because he seems to share the job duties with his mom, and sometimes is this hunky guy kidnapping Psyche, and other times he's a baby throwing arrows. In this version, he is the baby version of Barry White and sounds exactly like him when he speaks. In case you want to check how Baby-Love speaks, please go to youtube and type in Barry White Can't Get Enough Of Your Love Babe 1974.
Tlatli: She is inspired by Tlazolteotl, the Aztec goddess of steam baths, midwives, Sin and official patroness of adulterers. Seriously. Go check it out. In my version, she looks like the celestial love child of Salma Hayek and Penelope Cruz. She even speaks with the accent and everything.
Jackal: That's Anubis, the Egyptian god of the Underworld.
Agni: The Hindu/Vedic god of fire, who has three forms: fire, lightning and the sun. The bit about the seven tongues, the three legs, the ram, etc. are true. That's how he's usually represented. I felt compassion in my heart for the guy, and gave him enough brains to copy Zuko's form. I don't know why, but in this fanfic Agni has an Oxbridge accent. (You know, the very upperclass British accent where Oxford meets Cambridge).
La's father Probably Neptune or Poseidon, the Greco-Roman god of the seas. I say probably, because with Fate's attitude it could have been any lively cod from the coasts of Galicia for all we know.
God of Small Annoying Things: I Totally made him up. (He looks like Paul Giamatti). Not to be confused with the wonderful novel "The God of Small Things" by Arundhati Roy.
Hrish: I totally made him up too. NO, I don't know what he looks like. That's what your imagination is for.
Fate: Yep, made her up. She looks like … GUESS?? (She speaks with a Brooklyn/ NY accent though. Don't ask me why.)
Yue: ATLA
La: ATLA. The psychological issues and the bad attitude are mine, but is not my fault. It's Fate's and her lousy parental skills.
Monotheist God(s): NO ONE that I know. This guy and the others are NOT related to ANY known God here or out there, ever.
The Chosen People: They are this small Indian tribe from the jungles of Darien in Central America who kept being bitten by mosquitoes. They changed gods, and went with a different deity not interested in Chosen Ones, moved to the archipelago of San Blas and lived happily ever after. No, I was not referring to any other People that may be Chosen and Miserable out there.
Katara's mom: Her bit was inspired by the beautiful song "Historia de un sueño" (that's Foreign for History of a Dream) by the amazing Spanish group La Oreja de Van Gogh. Go check it out if you speak Foreign. Go to youtube and type Historia de un sueño.
The Pure Lands: Kind of like a Buddhist Nirvana.
Any resemblance between the Pantheon of the Gods and Cori Celesti in the AMAZING AND EXTRAORDINARY books of MY ULTIMATE HERO and wordsmith EXTRAORDINAIRE SIR TERRY PRATCHETT is not coincidental. This entire chapter is in HOMAGE to him. However, the bit of broccoli and chocolate comes from my elder sister, who was juggling two guys at the same time at one point in her life and who kept telling me that one was like chocolate and the other was like broccoli. She ended up with the broccoli because that was the sane thing to do, but several years later ran to the arms of the chocolate. You just cannot deny chocolate. The first time I read Terry Pratchett take on the matter I was aghast about the fact that he was putting in paper my sister's crazy approach to relationships. A friend of mine says that everything written and created in this world is a palimpsest. I agree with him completely. (Don't feel bad, I had to run to the dictionary too. That's the reason why I choose friends smarter than me. There's nothing I can do about my family, though.)
The God of Small Annoying Things is the most despicable deity out there. And yes, he's married to Terry Pratchett's Annoia, the Goddess of Things that Get Stuck in Drawers.