Woe… I'm Life's Whore

Woe… I'm Life's Whore

Naruto discovers some funky feelings. A LOT of drama ensues. AU SasuNaru, plus other pairings (surprise ). Some possible OOCness.. plot-line a little more serious than the title.

Main Pairing: SasuNaru/NaruSasu Others: GaaNaru/NaruGaa KibaShino/ShinoKiba

R&R

Chapter Seven: Destroy! Destroy!

Bzzt.. Bzzt.. Bzzt.. Bzzt..

"Shnpngedttoutt…" Naruto mumbled, tossing over, pulling all the bed sheets with him.

Sasuke rubbed his temples and propped himself up. He tapped the alarm clock to 'snooze' and looked over at the blonde boy next to him.

He was cocooned in a thick layer of faded-orange and green blankets. Sasuke's mouth twitched into a small smile, reminding him to bother the boy about his awful colour-coordination. He reached past the chaotic-blonde hair and put a finger to his cheek…

"Good morning, dobe…" he lent down and brushed his lips against the cheek. Naruto remained dead to the world. Sasuke sighed and got up, finding his conventional-macho-sports-bag and grabbing his towel. Shower it was…

-

Naruto half-consciously felt across his sheets to find his personal-heater missing, and a lazy eye drifted open.

"Nnnn.." he tried to mumble out 'Sasuke' but failed, sitting upright with his eyes still closed. He pried them open…

There was steam coming out of the bathroom… must be having a shower.

He looked at the clock, it was still early…

His eyes glued themselves shut and he fell asleep immediately.

-

Bzzt.. Bzzt.. Bzzt..

Naruto sat up immediately, fuming angrily, throwing a pillow unceremoniously at the constant-headache.

"Bluhhhhh!!" He yelled at it, "Shut up!!"

"Not a morning person, are you," Sasuke walked in, dressed in school uniform, prefect's blazer adorning his sculpted torso. An apron was loosely tied over his uniform, and he held out a pan offering eggs and bacon.

"You like the crispy bits?" he asked.

Naruto stared at him, shocked and amused, "You can cook?"

He gave a bemused smile as he left for the kitchen, "I can do a lot of things."

Naruto rolled his eyes and hoisted himself up, following the other boy. "Lemme guess… you can do anything.."

"Wrong…" Sasuke said, ambushing him as he turned the corner, wrapping arms around his waist and pressing his mouth down on his. After a brief moment he broke away and held his lips on Naruto's neck. He whispered into the flesh.

"I can do everything…"

He left Naruto standing there, staring at the ceiling, mouth slightly parted, and went back to breakfast.

"Jerk…" Naruto said, smiling, taking off his pyjama top and throwing it at him.

Sasuke whipped a hand out to swipe the shirt away before it came anywhere near his face. "Please…" he said, "this isn't a strip club…"

"Yeah, you wish it was," Naruto replied, suddenly getting an idea.

"Hn," Sasuke remained unperturbed.

Naruto loosened the drawstrings of his pyjama pants and set them so that they hung low, very low. Clasping to his hips like the leaves to trees in autumn. He wound his fingers through his own hair, creating a muffed, just-sexed-up look, placed one hand on his hip, one finger in his mouth, and stood a meter behind his prey.

"Sasuke…" he let the word roll of his tongue as if it were made of chocolate.

Sasuke turned round slowly, having just finished arranging the food. He almost dropped the plates at the sight he saw.

Naruto screamed take-me-here-and-now, and although something in his mind told him the boy was just teasing to get him back, that part of his brain was grossly overridden with other thoughts. Very, very… sexy thoughts.

"…Naruto…" Sasuke started, walking past the boy and putting the plates down on the table and sitting down in front of his own food.

Naruto jumped into his lap and wrapped his arms around Sasuke's neck, tilted his head and pouted. "Yes?" Sasuke had to shut his eyes and was shaking slightly.

"… I suggest… if you don't want to get raped… that you eat breakfast then have a shower…"

Naruto lowered his eyelids and smiled a dangerous smile. He was trying so hard.

The blonde gave a slow, drawn-out, lick down Sasuke's jaw line, stopping at the ear and playing with the lobe, scraping it between teeth and tongue. He felt hands snake up to his waist, and a small, almost-inaudible moan escaped Sasuke's throat. Oh, the power.

He stood up, drawing-out the action, and leaving only his face behind, kissing Sasuke chastely, smiling. "How true, Sasuke-kun…"

He felt Sasuke shudder and make a grab for his waist, but jumped out of his way, grabbing the breakfast and bouncing off towards the bathroom… "Thanks for the breakfast, Sasuke!!"

Sasuke frowned as he heard "…I can do everything…" sing-song mocking him from the bathroom.

-

Naruto had taken so long in the shower that the pair were almost late to school. After many 'dobe's' from Sasuke, they had finally made it with some quick walking and shortcuts.

Briiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!

Naruto whacked open the home-room door, panting, Sasuke in tow.

"Jeez… you're so unfit, dobe," Sasuke smirked.

"Sasuke-kun!!"

Sasuke's smirk fell. It seemed a school's worth of fan-girls had just shown up in the homeroom…

No… just Sakura. Sasuke and Naruto had agreed to tell Sakura, and only Sakura, since the three of them had been friends since forever. Although how, exactly, was another question.

"Sasuke!! I saved you a seat!! Here!"

Naruto pouted. Sakura noticed.

"Don't worry, Naruto, I saved you one too.."

Naruto bounced over and took the middle seat, determined to be noticed, be it through obnoxious attitudes or not.

Sakura smiled a twinged smile. As soon as Sasuke sat down, however, she leant across the table and started talking to the boy, who was replying with his usual "Yes" "No" "Maybe" responses and Naruto felt totally cut. Cut out from the action, cut out from the conversation, and just plain cut. He had always liked Sakura, just a little more than the other girls, and it had always infuriated him that Sasuke got all the attention.

"… and I was thinking maybe we could meet up on Saturday and…"

"No."

She was unwavering. "Oh, C'mon, Sasuke, why not…?"

"I'm already seeing someone."

Silence dropped like a stone through water.

The whole class had stopped chatting and turned to see what Sasuke had to say next.

Sakura swallowed. She was obviously hurt, and annoyed. "Since when?"

"Since last night."

She winced.

"That means it would be someone I know."

Silence.

There was a devious fire in Sasuke's eyes which Naruto didn't like.

"Let's just say I got hooked up with a hot blonde…" Sasuke droned.

…

Sakura stood up, angry, shaking, fists clenched. She turned to the teacher and muttered a quick, "excuse me," to the teacher before leaving and striding off, tears forming in her eyes.

"Sasuke, what have you done?" Naruto swallowed.

"She had to be told eventually… I mean, what's the worst she could do?" Sasuke smiled weakly.

Naruto stopped and thought for a second.

"Kill Ino…"

… Sasuke winced as he made the connection.

Naruto's eyes widened. "Find out on her own and tell Ino…"

"Shit…" Sasuke murmured as he hurdled the desk and ran after her.