He didn't actually get to the strangling part, though he desperately wished he had. Jareth took nearly four hours to calm down after finally settle down enough that Sarah could convince him to go through her bookshelves so he'd have something to read while she attended her courses at school.
He'd known, of course, that it was her sort of bribery to make him stop yelling, but he took advantage of the invitation to steal her well-worn copy of 'The Hobbit', along with 'Catch-22', 'Vamped', 'Wee Free Men' (Sarah had laughed so hard at the irony, but he didn't know what the book was about, yet), as well as filching one of her less filled drawing pads.
She hadn't noticed it yet, but he'd also swiped her favorite pen and ink set, as well as one of her notebooks and an old diary.
... It was a very good thing Sarah hadn't noticed, especially the dairy, especially since he was reading it aloud to Slidge.
It was only two days into his stay with Sarah at her dorm, and he was going stir crazy. Not a good sign, especially since Sarah said that they'd be staying in the (miniscule) room for a month. That's right, a 'month'. Dear deities, he was going to commit suicide out of sheer boredom. He'd finished 'Vamped' and 'The Hobbit' already, much against Sarah's warnings. But, damnit, he'd been so bored yesterday he could hardly stand it.
Sarah said, earlier, that she'd set up a World of Warcraft character for him to play for the next few weeks. He wasn't entirely sure what a World of Warcraft was, but as far as he could tell, it was a subspecies of a video game...
He heard Sarah approaching and rapidly hid the book in a dimensional loophole, standing to greet her (and steal the food she carried) once Sarah opened the door. She allowed him to take the bags of nourishment-- and he knew he only had it because she let him; Sarah could be positively vicious when it came to her food-- and sat on the edge of the bed, leaving him the (creaky) desk chair.
The room was so small that, eating at opposite ends of the dorm room, Sarah was 'still' able to reach over and grab food off Jareth's plate. Slidge sat on Jareth's shoulder, nibbling on a few pieces of pepperoni that Sarah picked off for him. The little Goblin heard a sound that rang softly-- suspiciously sounding like the new wood flute Jareth had carved not three weeks ago-- and popped away.
Jareth didn't get long to see Sarah; she headed out the door, presumably to her next class, after inhaling her pizza (and a few pinches of cheese off of his). The interlude was just that, merely an interlude in the banal melancholy of the Goblin King's day.
He thought he was so smart, sneaking her pens, stealing her notebook, taking her diary. In fact, she almost didn't let him get away with the diary, but since it was filled with stories and not actual entries, Sarah said nothing. Let the damn ball-tosser think he'd pulled off his crime; in the long run it didn't affect anything.
Sarah hurried to the cafe to meet Chame. The Fae woman said it was time to get the next phase of the plan in gear, which meant Sarah couldn't be in her room until her last class was over. After all, Jareth needed plenty of time to find the "distraction" his mother was setting up, and then more time to justify why the "distraction" should be allowed a home in Sarah's dorm. The "distraction" would give Sarah plenty of time to maneuver Jareth into place, the nature of the "distraction" and Jareth's tendency to dote upon anything that caught his fancy meant that this was the best "weapon" to be used against the Goblin King. Sarah thought weapon was an apt term, as it was a battle to get Jareth to cooperate without giving away the surprise. As her father would say, "All's fair in love and family... Both of which are like war, but somewhat messier. Ouch! Karen, stop hitting me!"
When she'd heard what Chame had in mind, Sarah had almost refused. After all, it wasn't fair for the "distraction" to seek safe haven in her living quarters. It was packed as it was, with Jareth's Portable Poofzilla shoved between her bed and the desk. The room was barely big enough to be a cubicle; three beings sharing the space to sleep and live in would be very uncomfortable. But Chame had convinced her that Jareth was very resourceful when he put his mind to it, and would (eventually) find a way to keep his early birthday gift (not that he'd know that's what the distraction would turn out to be) and keep all three of them in a cozy environment. Sarah didn't know how this event would occur, but figured that necessity would push Jareth into utilizing his 'genius' if nothing else did.
Chame showed her the "distraction", and Sarah felt the last of her doubts melt away. For now, anyway; Chame assured Sarah that the tiny little bundle wouldn't remain so tiny for long.
Ah, well. Its cuteness could be enjoyed while it lasted. Sarah sighed and made a mental note to pick up food for the "distraction". Chame, after inquiring why Sarah had sighed, enchanted a leaf so Sarah could call upon Chame to get food for Jareth's gift.
The two women watched the "distraction" for another twenty minutes or so before Sarah actually needed to get to class. Chame waved to the retreating mortal as she struggled to keep the "distraction" from following her human friend.
The Summons came while Jareth was doodling in Sarah's notebook. He set down the sketch before rushing off.
Usually, Jareth considered the Summons of the wished away to be tedious. But cramped in Sarah's dorm room, without any Goblins for company (Slidge hadn't returned after lunch), Jareth's boredom had been joined by a sort of loneliness. He was used to having a couple hundred Goblins at court, and a thousand or so more in the City. Even more were scattered in clans throughout the Labyrinth and some strayed into the desert to live. The few that wandered past the barren desert stayed in the woodlands he controlled; as a rule, the Goblins did not leave the lands of the Goblin King. The outside world was hostile to them, for reasons unbeknownst to the Goblins.
Jareth, really, didn't understand it either. The Goblins were cunning, crafty; mischievous to be sure, but for the most part, they were harmless. It wasn't unless someone threatened the Kingdom that the Goblins became the stuff of shadows and nightmares... So why did people think of them as stupid and dangerous? The stupid part he could understand, but the Goblins generally only acted that way. It was more curiosity than idiocy that made them behave as they did.
He had plenty of time to ponder this, as he stalked off to answer the Summons. The Goblins that normally would rush him were absent, so Jareth took his own sweet time to arrive at the wished away's location.
Somewhat startled by the lack of the wisher, Jareth none-the-less scooped up the little bundle of blankets. A card fell out, and he read over it quickly. Jareth snorted at the carelessness of the wisher, and then pulled back a corner of the soft blanket to reveal the wished away. It wiggled, a little, in the Goblin King's grasp, but for the most part, the wished away seemed content to rest in the warmth of the blanket, sleeping peacefully as Jareth bought it back to Sarah's dorm.
He looked thoughtfully at the wished away. How the hell do I convince Sarah to let me keep it? Let's see... she has a schedule somewhere on her desk, what time is her last class? Five forty... So she'll be back at around six. I could say it was wished away at four thirty or so, and then she has to let it stay with me for at least thirteen hours. Plenty of time to bully her into letting it stay and to get it settled in. Excellent...
It yawned and shifted in his arms, and Jareth unwrapped the blanket fully to let it curl up on his lap. Contentedly humming to the wished away, Jareth pulled it close and returned to his doodling.
Sarah paused outside her door. She knew exactly what she would find when she opened it, and she knew this would be the time when her acting skills were put to the test. She also knew she should stop procrastinating and get it over with.
Jareth lay stretched out upon her bed, the wished away-- the "distraction"-- happily gnawing on a pizza crust Jareth must have given it.
"Oh, good, you're back. This little fellow needs a name-"
"What is that and why is it in here, Jareth?"
Her voice sounds scarily calm, Jareth noted. Which means she's probably getting ready to yell at me. Fun.
"He's a wished away, and it's in here because the thirteen hours of the wisher aren't up yet. It's a Goblin law- the wished away stays with the king." Unwritten, true, but implied. Goblins wrote down everything but the laws.
"Oh? And how many hours are left?"
"Eleven hours, and-" Jareth paused to glance at the clock on Sarah's desk- "forty eight minutes."
Sarah was half surprised that he was so specific, but she also suspected he'd made it up on the spot, so she kept her act going.
"I don't suppose the wisher is going to run the Labyrinth." Sarah folded her arms and leaned back against the door.
"I don't suppose so either, since the wisher was nowhere to be found by the time I arrived," Jareth said, unfazed. "I did get a note, however, asking me to take good care of the little wished away. And look at him, Sarah; he's so small he hardly counts as another roommate!"
Goblin Kings should so not be able to use puppy-dog eyes, Sarah thought as she rubbed the bridge of her nose, both for effect and so she didn't start laughing hysterically at Jareth.
"Does he have a name?" She made sure that she sounded surly, as if she was starting to break down. Acting for the sake of acting was one thing, acting to pull off the best prank and surprise party was much harder.
Jareth brightened almost perceivably. She's wearing down! Aloud, he responded. "Not yet. I was waiting to see if you wanted to help me name him. Personally, I think he looks like a Jareth, and though it would be rather confusing to have two Jareths around, it--"
"There is no way Above or Under that I will let you name him Jareth."
"Hm. Garrett, then?"
"No."
"Jay?"
"Jareth..."
"What? No? Then how about... Seth?"
"That's so blindingly obvious that it isn't even funny."
"I don't see you coming up with any bright ideas!"
"Fine, then, oh Goblin King, here's one: Aelfric. Or another, Cormac. Or maybe, Alexander. Or perhaps, Tynan. Or possibly, Davin, Actaeon, Erebos, Sandulf, Koli, Ciardha, Aatto, Raoul, Zev, Rasui, Avery, Faolan, Summanus... I have more, if you'd like."
"No, thanks. Why do you know...?"
"I'm a writer! I need names for my characters!"
"Ah. Hm. Hey, wasn't Actaeon torn apart by-"
"Yes."
"We're not naming him that. Ciardha is nice... what does it mean?"
"Does it matter?" At the withering glare he shot at her, Sarah answered, "Dark... It means dark."
"Suits him," Jareth said, glancing down at the long, soft fuzz covering the head of the wished away. "But... maybe Zev... I like that one, it's unique... Which one do you think is best?"
"Personally, I like Faolan and Koli."
"Maybe we should wait and name him based on behavior," Jareth suggested.
"No. Pick a name."
"Fine! What do you think?" Jareth suddenly turned to the wished away. "Faolan or Zev? Blink once for Zev, twice for Faolan."
"Jareth, that's absolutely ridiculous! He's just a baby!" As if to prove Sarah wrong, the wished away turned to Sarah, its hunter-green eyes staring with determination into her emerald eyes... And blinked twice.
"Which did he pick?" Jareth asked. The wished away turned to the Fae and blinked twice at him. Jareth sighed, but relented.
"Fine, fine, side with her... Well, it is your name, after all." The wished away wiggled happily, barked, and licked Jareth's face. "Faolan! Hey!" The pup pounced, and Sarah giggled as she watched the Goblin King wrestle with the tiny puppy.
"I suppose..." Sarah trailed off with a sigh. Super acting time, she thought to herself. Oh joy. Both Jareth and Faolan perked up, watching her from where they were sprawled across the bed. "I suppose... since we named him and all... that we really can't toss him out." A long, tense silence formed, while both males-- unaware of the plotting that had gone into this moment-- held their breath and waited for the other shoe to drop.
"But the dorm expressly forbids the ownership of pets, so Jareth, it's going to be your responsibility keeping him happy, healthy, and hidden. Understood?" Both dog and Fae nodded vigorously, and Sarah hid her grin by turning to reopen the door. She looked at them before heading out, calling to them, "I'll go out and get food for the three of us... And some dog toys, I guess. Don't cause too much trouble while I'm gone."
Once he was sure she was gone, Jareth cheered softly. The pup at his side barked, just as quietly, also in celebration.
"Well, Faolan, once you're settled in, it will be smooth sailing, my friend... At least, it will be until your wings start to form and I have to explain to Sarah that you're a Fae wolf, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. She probably won't care... much..."
"Well?" Chame strolled beside Sarah as the mortal woman walked through a nearby pet store.
"Jareth absolutely loves Faolan. And neither of them suspects a thing."
"I take it Faolan is the pup? An interesting name... Did Jareth come up with it?"
"No, I did. Jareth tried to name it after himself, so I listed a few names and we picked our favorites... Then we let Faolan choose."
"Faolan was the name you picked out?"
"Yes. Jareth wanted to name him Zev."
"He would, wouldn't he... I'll let you get back to your shopping. And here-- this ought to pay for Faolan's food."
"Thank you, Chame. I'll send a message to you through Slide tomorrow, alright? Good, and good bye."
The women parted, basking in the victory of the second battle in the war... And setting up the third. Sarah couldn't keep the devious grin from growing, but she managed to stay away from the dorm long enough to compose herself before entering with the food...
And get tackled by Faolan just after opening the door, and receiving a very similar treatment from Jareth, as both tried to steal the food she carried.
Oro: Yes, Faolan has a purpose. He is a major plot device (though I'm not sure, yet, if he'll be a major character). Anyway, in this chapter, I don't own:
Sarah: Labyrinth...
Jareth: Its characters...
Quill: The Hobbit...
Oro: Catch 22...
Sarah: Vamped...
Jareth: or Wee Free Men.
Quill: Review. I made sure to force Oro to type this while she was sick to see if illness affects her writing style.
Oro: Thanks so much, Quill. You evil bastard.
Quill: Ah, so you don't want the next chapter...
Oro: (glares) Really, though, please review, and good night, all!