Such Is the Life of a Slut

Chapter Three: Exchange (Edward Elric x Frank Archer)

Okay, seriously. This has got to be one of the weirdest pairings of all time. Mainly because I never see Ed topping anyone (with the exception of Al, and occasionally Roy). Anyway, this is going to be like the last one, I think I'll try to keep all of these PG-13. Hmm. Maybe. Anyway, I must thank my lovely reviewers once again! I'm surprised slutty little Archer has some support here. Or not.

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"So you want to go into the city of Liore. You know this is a warzone, FullMetal."

"I don't care."

"You could get killed."

"I have to stop Scar."

"Seems like Every alchemist has a vendetta against him."

"Yeah."

"…"

"Yes, sir."

"That's better." Frank Archer finally glanced up from the paper he was reading over to stare at the FullMetal Alchemist, icy eyes narrowed suspiciously. "And why do you have to stop him, per se? Why not leave it up to the army? It would be far easier for seven thousand men to take him down than for a child."

Ed growled something inappropriate at that. "I'll do what I have to in order to stop him. I'm not sure what he's planning."

"Mm." Archer didn't sound interested. He wasn't. Why be interested in something like this? There were other, more important things to do. For example, get Mustang to fill out his paperwork. Lazy ass…

"Sir, let me go, under your command."

"And why should I agree to such a ridiculous demand?" Archer asked, again glancing up, ice eyes meeting gold. How could any child have eyes that large? It was beyond him. And gold? Really, only Kimbley had golden eyes, but that couldn't be natural. It was believed that Kimbley's abnormal eye and hair color, the fact he never aged, and several other small figures, were to be attributed to the use of the fake stones. Archer didn't know much about them, but Tucker used them in advancing the State Alchemist pocket watches, absolutely necessary for the plans he was lying down.

"I'll do anything." Edward paused for a moment before walking around the desk, ignoring Archer's rather bemused exclamation, instead kneeling beside the elder man's knees and pressing his hands on them. "Anything." He repeated in a hushed whisper.

"F-FullMetal. This is completely inappropriate." Archer squirmed under the boy's strong grasp as automail clenched into flesh. "Let go of me,"

"Not until I get what I want. I want to go into Liore. You'll let me." And with that, the FullMetal Alchemist moved his human hand over to trail his fingers down the rather prominent bulge in the Colonel's pants.

FullMetal was in Liore within hours.