"How the hell did you manage it, Inara?" Mal said, exasperation on his face.

"I didn't exactly do it on purpose," she snapped back, then winced as Simon tried to rotate her ankle. Then she did more than wince. "Ow!" she yelled, right in his ear, trying to pull away from him.

"Yes, you've broken it." Simon sighed, hoping to eventually regain his hearing.

"Broken?"

"Yes. I'll have to put your lower leg in plaster."

"No, there has to be –"

"Plaster. Now."

Mal crossed his arms. "And I'm still waiting to hear how you managed to do this, 'Nara."

"I tripped," Inara said through gritted teeth.

"Is this the kinda trip like the one you took after Saffron kissed me?"

She glared at him, but didn't speak.

"It weren't her fault, captain," Kaylee said quickly from the doorway to the infirmary. "It was mine."

"Yours?" Mal turned to look at her. "You two been arguing or something?"

"No. We went shopping."

His brows drew together. "Since when was that a dangerous occupation? 'Cept for the man, o'course, who always has to pay."

She crossed the threshold specifically to hit him on the arm. "I pay for myself." At Simon's glance she added quickly, "Mostly." Lifting her chin defiantly, she went on, "We were looking for clothes."

"So they leapt up and attacked Inara?"

Kaylee sighed. Sometimes men could be so dense. "No. We bought some stuff – quite a lot, as it happens. And we came back, and were carrying them up to 'Nara's shuttle when she tripped and …" She indicated the medbed. "… here we are."

"So that'd be why there's a mess of boxes in the cargo bay that ain't mine. Not 'less I went crazy and bought a whole load of stuff from Maison Chic?"

"I'll get 'em put away, don't you fret."

"I wasn't fretting, Kaylee. But I got a potential client coming in soon, and I don't exactly want to give him the wrong impression."

"Doing it now, captain." She gave a sloppy salute and ran out of the infirmary.

Simon had meanwhile prepped and injected a painkiller, and the agonised look on Inara's face had eased somewhat, but she still wasn't happy. "Go away, Mal." She glared at him.

"What did I do?" he asked. "Not like I pushed you down the stairs."

"You're thinking how stupid I am."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes you are. I can see it in your face."

"Then my face is lying."

"Do you know why we went shopping?"

"What?"

"Why we went shopping. Do you know what the reason was."

"I'm figuring you needed some more fancy doodads."

"No, it's so I could find something more to your taste!" Her voice was getting louder.

"Inara, try and lie still," Simon said, pressing his hands into her shoulders. "If your adrenaline levels rise much more they're going to counteract the painkiller and that -"

"More to my taste?" Mal stared at her, ignoring the young man. "What's my taste got to do with it?"

"You don't want the Companion!" She shouted at him then burst into tears.

"'Nara …" He stepped forward, not quite sure how this happened, but wanting to comfort her, stop her from breaking his heart like this.

"It's shock, Mal," Simon said quietly. "You'd better go while I plaster her leg."

"Doc, I -"

"I'll let you know when it's done."

"Cap, there's a guy in a fancy suit waiting for you in the cargo bay," Kaylee said, bouncing down the steps. "Says his name's Smith."

Mal grumbled under his breath, and turned to leave the infirmary.

"It's not like you don't lie here often enough," Inara yelled to his departing back, sobbing. "Bullet wounds, laser blasts …"

"Inara, do I have to sedate you?" Simon asked, his exasperation finally beginning to show through.

"Aw, honey, he didn't mean to upset you," Kaylee said, crossing to the bed and taking her friend's hand.

Inara sobbed louder.

-x-

Mr Smith had gone on his way, promising them cargo by dawn. If anything, the pile of boxes from Maison Chic seemed to have persuaded him that this wasn't just a rundown old Firefly, but that people of some distinction might reside here.

Mal watched him get into his expensive hover and leave them sitting in a cloud of dust, then he turned towards the infirmary. She was getting to him, that was clear. He'd had to concentrate on the business details, when what he really wanted to do was go shout at Inara. And … maybe hold her hand. Stop the pain. In fact, stop her from tripping in the first place.

He sighed. This was it. The very crux of the dilemma. The reason he disapproved of shipboard romances in the first place. His attention was divided. If that had been a standoff, someone determined to kill him and his, it could've gotten bloody because he was thinking with part of his brain about Inara. Another of his crew could've ended up lying next to her, blood on the floor. Worse, it could have been his.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. As much as he wanted her, wanted to take her into his bed and make her moan his name, wanted to wake up in the morning and see that face on the pillow next to his, there were problems. His problems, for sure, but he was the captain. His problems tended to affect the rest of his crew. And that could cause -

"Mal, she's ready to go back to her shuttle, if you'd like to take her." Simon leaned out of the doorway to the common area.

"She likely to let me?"

"She's calmed down a lot." The young man stepped through. "She was in shock, Mal. I think it's the first time she's actually broken anything."

"Yeah, well, that would have an effect."

"And remember, she's not a Companion anymore."

Mal started. "She told you?"

"Everyone knows, Mal." Moving closer, Simon lowered his voice. "You have to understand what a Companion is."

"I know what they are, doctor."

"No, I don't think you do." He led Mal a little way further from the door. "Being a Companion is an amazingly selfish occupation. And now she's changing from that, and thinking of you."

"Selfish?" Mal shook his head. "Doc, they service people. Do what they're told -"

"Because they choose to. No-one makes a man or woman become a Companion. And their whole life is dedicated to fulfilling their contracts. Everything they do, or think, they gear towards being the best. Etiquette, deportment, hair … have you noticed how Inara doesn't eat much?"

"What?"

"When we have a meal together. She doesn't eat much."

"Well, compared to some of us, maybe not, but -"

"Because it has been ground into her from when she was a child that Companions aren't fat. They're beautiful because they're slim and dainty, and elegant because -"

"That's crazy. Thought we'd got past that."

"Not really. How would you feel if Inara put on weight?"

To give him credit Mal thought for a moment. "Wouldn't worry me, doc. Ain't how she looks."

"But it was. Originally," Simon pressed.

"Can't say she didn't look good, that first time I showed her round the shuttle. But -"

"She gave it up for you. Being that person of high esteem, no matter what you or anyone else thought of the job itself. Every Companion dreams of becoming House Priestess, and Inara was no different. She was selfishly heading towards that goal when she met you. And now she has chosen to change that life, to -"

"Doc, I know."

"I'm not sure you do. Because you have to change for her as well."

"And what if I'm thinking about her instead of my job, Simon? What if I get someone killed because my mind's on her and not on whether that guy with the gun's gonna fire or not?" He stepped closer. "What if I get you killed?"

"Then I will be very pissed and come and haunt you."

"Doc, I understand what you're saying. She's given all this up to see if we have a future. And she's scared. Well, so am I."

"Scared that if this all falls apart, you'll be left with nothing?"

Mal's lips twitched, but there was no humour in his voice. "Doc, been left with nothing more'n a couple of times now. It ain't new to me."

"But you've never been in love before." Simon shook his head. "She's given up all this … frippery. And you have to give up something for her."

"Doc -"

"Give up thinking you have to do this by yourself. You're not alone, Mal. You haven't been for a long time. Zoe, Kaylee, me … even Jayne. What's wrong with having someone in your life?"

"Nothing! I just …" He stopped, looking at this man with his serious face, his youth, and realised age had nothing to do with insight. "I don't want to get anyone killed," he finished quietly.

"And you won't. And if you do -"

"Yeah, you'll come haunt me."

"That's a given, but I was going to say that having Inara in your life isn't going to change that. People die, Mal. No matter what we do."

Mal knew he was thinking about Wash, about Book, and maybe others in his past, and his own mind ran over the many men he'd been responsible for … "How'd you get to be so smart?" he asked wonderingly.

"Top three percent." Simon suddenly smiled. "And having a sister like mine helps."

Of course. It was like a bolt of realisation in Mal's mind. Simon had given everything up for River, dedicated himself to helping her, not letting anyone else in … until Kaylee. It had taken Miranda for him to see what he was missing, but they were finally together. And if he could do it … Mal straightened. "So she's ready to go back to the shuttle?"

"I suggested one of the passenger rooms but she declined."

"Bit your head off?"

"Can't you see the wound?" Simon smiled, touching his neck.

Mal dropped his head, pretending to study that area. "Thought that was a hickey."

Simon coloured a little. "Well, perhaps. Anyway, yes, Inara's ready."

"I'll take her up."

"Thanks."

Simon watched the captain head towards the infirmary, passing Kaylee on the way and touching her shoulder like he often did.

"You really think that?" Kaylee asked softly, crossing the bay. "That Inara's selfish?"

Simon looked into her dark, troubled eyes. "Honestly? No. But Mal needed something to hold onto."

She smiled slowly. "You mean you lied to him?"

"I didn't lie. I … stretched the truth." He took her into his arms. "They need each other."

"You're a good man."

"Not that good," he said, touching her lips with his. "I was actually thinking that, with Inara gone from the infirmary, I could take a break."

"A break?"

"I suddenly find myself feeling a little tired. And you look like you could do with a nap. Eventually." He ran his hand down her back to her buttocks.

Kaylee grinned. "Oh, not good at all."