Pairing: Jason/Liz.
Title: A Convenient Proposal
AN: Thanks for all of those who have reviewed. It is much appreciated! I thank you for the constructive critique. I want to thank those who don't even like the couple, willing to read it and give it a chance.
Her fingertips slid against the textured wall leading down to the main floor of the penthouse, distracted by her thoughts. Elizabeth still did not know how this was going to work. He proposed; she had said yes. After that, it was standing in front of close friends and family and explaining how she had lied and that this child was Jason Morgan's baby. Flashes of Audrey, Lulu, Nikolas, Emily, and Lucky's jaws dropping kept playing over in her head. It was all that she could see. There were no words to express how much she hated deceiving them. It wasn't about not telling the truth, but about feeling so pressured to be the woman they thought she was.
In their eyes, Elizabeth was the fragile woman, broken by the event of her rape whose life was turned into a fairytale when Lucky Spencer walked into her life. When Lucky 'died' she almost drowned in their sympathy, overprotectiveness and expectations. When Lucky died, it had been a gift in a way. She had found out she was stronger than she could have ever imagined. Elizabeth realized she could do things and make decisions on her own without an overseer. This was not to say that Lucky had treated her even remotely like that; however, where she had found strength in him to survive that mental and emotional tragedy, she had found strength in herself to move on.
When Lucky came back it had been different and she had a balancing act to perform. Nevertheless, in the end she became more passive and less dependent on the newfound strength she had found through his death. Lucky always saw her as 'his Elizabeth'. His mind could not grasp that she was a strong indepenent woman now. Their relationship stumbled upon the obstacle which gave her strength in his death. When Jason came back into town, she found herself wanting that freedom she once enjoyed. Instead, Elizabeth turned her back on it all and decided she couldn't take the risk. In all of those days of mourning she had wished for a second chance and she couldn't deny it, even if it meant hiding a piece of herself that no one wanted to see.
Fast forward though to present day and here she was divorced to Lucky after marrying him and watching their love crumble under the strain of drugs and an affair. It had been perfect while it lasted, but Lucky's insecurity and pride became his downfall and almost pulled her and Cameron down with him. And now she was married to a man who was in love with another woman, but unable to bear him a child. She, on the other hand, felt more than just friendship for him. It was a no-win situation. Closing her eyes she felt warm tears form again. How had this happened?
Everything happened so fast. Once she had told everyone the truth, the lynch mob that formed was fearful. Hundreds of questions came at her and no time or breath to answer any of them. It was then that Jason pulled her aside, stepping in front of the angry, betrayed group of friends and family, hindering the onslaught that she felt was inevitable. She could hear his voice clearly above the screams and confusion.
"Stop it! She made a mistake," he explained, even though his tone was more like a command. "And if anyone of you hasn't lied or kept a secret from someone then step up. If not, then I suggest you lower your voices and calm down."
It settled the crowd, but did not keep the questions from coming. She felt overwhelmed and nauseous. It was worse than she had even dreamed. The biggest thing was not the disappointed expressions on all of their faces, but the hammering disappointment in herself. This was something she would never have done. She was the biggest advocate for the truth even when it hurt. But lately it had been: Hide the truth because it will hurt too much.
When she near to passing out, Jason whisked her out of the Inquisition. He talked as she tried to find herself out of the haze. His voice calmed the raging sea of emotions that crashed around inside her. Elizabeth had felt like she would just drown. But Jason was her port in the storm. He was her voice of reason. Who wouldn't want that in their life? Why wouldn't her child deserve to have that in its' life 24/7? And then came probably the most regrettable words ever to come across her lips. "Jason, let's do it. Let's get married."'
He questioned the timing of her sudden change of heart but acquiesced when she blabbered on about knowing what she was doing. That night, Jason had the Justice of the Peace come to the Penthouse and join them in holy wedlock. She stared at the fireplace, which was now blackened and cold, where they had stood to exchange their vows. They were simple and almost forgetable as Elizbeth looked back on it. It was then that she suddenly heard a woman's sobs echo in the empty room. Elizabeth tried to locate the source, not seeing a single soul. Finally when turning around towards the door, she saw herself in the mirror and she realized it was her. She was the one crying.
Oh god, is this my life?
"No, I don't understand, Jason," Sam spat, completely enraged. "Tell me how you can profess your undying love for me and then turn on a dime and marry Liz!" It was surreal. Her life was spinning out of control. Ever since the night she slept with Ric, Sam's life had gone to hell.
"S-Sam," Jason stuttered, closing his eyes and rubbing his face. "I know it doesn't make sense and it hurts like hell. But this is something I have to do."
"But what about ME!" she cried, shaking her head in disbelief. Her whole body shook with grief and anger. He had betrayed her far worse than she thought he ever could. When he had pushed her away, she knew it had been for her safety. But what he had done now? It was unexplainable. "What are you going to do about us? What about US!" Grabbing his shirt, Sam pulled him close and locked gazes with him and searched the eyes that had once brought her comfort, joy and hope. Now it only proclaimed a sense of foreboding death.
"I have a child, Sam. I have to do what's best for..."
"So you're dumping me for a better model?" She couldn't believe her ears. It felt like a dream. Everything Sam had cherished in this man was now turning against her and making her despise him. "Because I can't bear your child," she sputtered, her mind reeling with all of the fantasies she would never have with him. "You're going to dump me for Elizabeth? The saint that can do no wrong in your eyes, except for the fact that she screwed you when she was still married to Lucky?" Pushing him away from her, Sam felt her throat close, her gag reflex in effect.
"Sam, I'm sorry," he whispered, reaching out to her. He had never meant to hurt her. But with Elizabeth carrying his child, he had to do what was right. Bringing this child into a solid family with a mother and father that loved it, was the best thing for him or her. "I don't know what to say."
"So," she spun around and stared at him defiantly, "what am I supposed to do now, Jason?" Her voice hitched as the emotion rose in her voice. "Am I supposed to wait around for you?" Sam angrily challenged him. "Am I supposed to just be your mistress, while you play house with Elizabeth? Am I supposed to move on? Find my own man?" Moving forward she closed the distance between them until she was only inches away from him. "You made me trust you, Jason. You made me promises that you are breaking all because of an accident."
He had no words to say. How could he explain to her in a way that she could understand? He loved her. He had proved that when he had managed to forgive something that he never imagined ever could be forgiven. His heart broke to see her so destroyed, but it wasn't just about them. This wasn't just about what they wanted. The night of the blackout, he and Elizabeth had, for one moment in time, found each other in the most unlikely circumstances. In that one moment in time, Jason felt no pain or regret. There was no harshness or accusations or distrust. Elizabeth was struggling in her crumbling world trying to make it through the night as he was. They came together and through fate or whatever they wanted to call it, his child was conceived. He would not turn his back on that.
"You have nothing to say?" Sam spat, as her whole body trembled. "You have nothing for me? The woman who would face bullets and psychotic killers just to be with you?" Biting her lips, she closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. Within the deepest part of her, Sam knew this day would come. She had made too many mistakes in her lifetime. This was just payback. Life had decided to show her what perfection was and that it was within her reach only to snatch it away. Through her tears, she choked out, "I'm just not enough." Without another word Sam spun on her heel and ran off, leaving Jason standing dismally staring after her.
I'm sorry, Sam. This is how it has to be.
Jason tiredly closed the door behind him and threw the keys on the desk. As soon as the metal hit the wooden desk, he noticed the mound of blankets piled haphazardly on the couch in the living room. He moved in for a closer look when the pile of blankets moved slightly before settling back into its' inert state. Wincing, Jason kicked himself for not noticing Elizabeth earlier. She must have fallen asleep on the couch. He walked around the front of the couch and found her curled up in a ball, sleeping peacefully. Her face was slightly flushed and her eyes swollen around the rims. She had been crying.
As much as Elizabeth had proclaimed how certain she had been about the shotgun marriage, he should have rejected her pleas. She had not been emotionally strong enough to make that big of a decision. As he gazed down upon her now, brushing a stray strand of dirty blonde hair away from her pale face, Jason wished he had.
He did believe that marrying her was the right thing to do. They were probably one in a million couples in a situation like this that could make it actually work - not just because their personalities meshed so well, but because they genuinely cared about each other. The love he had for her from their past still remained.
However things changed when he had met Sam. There wasn't an instant connection; but when he had seen her through the death of her child and the truly extraordinary woman Sam was, he fell hard. It wasn't an easy journey. Their love had been tested and tried by outside forces as well as by themselves. It looked like it would endure. And then the night of the blackout. Even through this they managed to weather the storm.
Jason let out a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Gazing down at Elizabeth, his hand trailed down the curve of her waist and over the round mound underneath the thin blanket. Nevertheless, all actions have consequences and this was the accumulation of many deliberate or undeliberate choices. Lowering his lips to the round mound that protected his only child, he whispered, "I will do everything in my power to protect you and your mother. I will give you all of the love that you deserve." Suddenly Elizabeth stirred, causing him to pull away.
"Jason?" she whispered groggily.
"Sorry, I woke you," he whispered, brushing the mound of hair that fell in front of her eyes. "Just go back to sleep."
"What time is it?" She shifted onto her back and pushed herself upright, trying to wipe the sleep from her eyes. "I just lay down for a second..." Her voice trailed off.
"Well it's definitely past yours and his bedtime," Jason chided gently, sliding up onto the couch, wrapping his arm around her raised knees. "Do you want me to carry you up to bed?"
"W-what?" Her expression was a mixture of confusion and recognition.
"It's late and you're tired," he explained. "So why don't you let me carry you up to your room?"
Her eyes widened with alertness and Elizabeth pulled away slightly. "Uh no," she protested with a nervous laugh. "That won't be necessary."
"What's wrong?" Jason frowned with concern. "What did I say?"
"Nothing," Elizabeth replied quickly, waving dismissively. Shaking her head she laughed softly, as if at herself. "It was just weird that you said that."
"Why?"
"Oh it remind me of a dream I had a while ago." She leaned back and searched for support behind her before pushing herself up from the couch. He rose up half-way, offering a hand. "It was nothing," Elizabeth declared softly. "Forget about it."
"Okay." Jason shrugged, doing as she asked, as he followed her towards the staircase. "Whatever you say."
"Oh my," she yawned, placing her hand over her open mouth. "I'm just so tired today, Jason."
"It's been a hard couple of days." With those words Elizabeth turned to look at him, searching his eyes for something. He wasn't quite certain what it was, but there was a hint of fear and sorrow in those crystal clear blue eyes of hers. She opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it, as if someone had commanded her to. As she turned to go up the stairs, Jason grasped her hand in his. "You know that I will always be here for you," he said steadily, pulling her close. "And I will never ever let anything bad happen to you or the baby."
"I know, Jason." A half-smile played at the corner of Elizabeth's lips as she nodded once. "But sometimes I wonder if that is enough?," she whispered, her words tinged with sadness. "We'll be great parents, Jason. But in the light of day, is that going to be enough for us?" Her hand gently caressed his cheek as her gaze traversed across his face. "Promises are easy to make, but sometimes not so easy to keep."