Chapter Five: Subtle Shades of Gray pt.1
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!
Sakura winced as her stomach spasmed painfully.
Her eyes instinctively drifted to the scar that—although hidden by her scarlet shirt—marred her torso.
She had been prone to debilitating cramps ever since her battle with Sasori. Tsunade believed it was due to a bit of scar tissue lining her uterus. It could be fixed at a later time, but until then she would have to rely on her skills as a medic to combat the pain.
"Sakura, are you alright?" Naruto called back.
'Shit!' She thought, realizing she had dropped out of formation.
"Yeah! Fine!" She replied sunnily as she fell back into alignment.
"Sakura, slow down if you need to." Sai whispered as he caught up to her.
She had never told anyone about her ailment. Not even Kakashi knew the details of her battle with the former Akasuki—but Sai had noticed it on a particularly long mission several months back and had taken it upon himself to watch her back.
She couldn't help but smile at his concern, he was like the brother she had never had. And she loved him—not romantically, but certainly platonically.
"I'm fine." She insisted.
"You're a horrible liar." He smirked.
"Thanks." She replied with mock dryness.
"We're only a day from Suna now!" Naruto cried happily, oblivious to Sakura and Sai's conversation.
"How is Gaara of the Desert?" Sasuke asked.
"I think you mean Lord Kazekage." Sai replied.
Sasuke visibly blanched.
"It'll be nice to see Gaara-sama again." Sakura reminisced.
Sasuke gaped. For her to so blatantly refer to a Kage by their name—such disrespect coming from Sakura was unimaginable.
"Surprised?" Kakashi asked with an eye crease. "They're very close. Like siblings."
"I see." The Uchiha nodded.
'How strong as she grown?' He wondered.
As expected, they reached Suna with time to spar. And Gaara—although surprised to see Sasuke—quickly had rooms ready for them.
With Kakashi and Naruto down the hall and two halls back, Sasuke figured it was as good a time as ever to try and speak with her.
Knocking gently, he heard her reply "Come in."
She obviously didn't know who it was, but he wasn't going to lose such a perfect opportunity. So he stepped inside.
"Oh….Sasuke…." She trailed off indifferently. "Can I help you?"
"Look, Haruno…" He immediately knew he had made a huge mistake.
"Don't slander my family name with your tongue." She snapped.
"Sak…"
"My name is reserved for my friends."
"What will it take for me to be able to talk to you?" He sighed in exasperation.
"Sasuke…"
"I've changed. I'm not the same person you used to know. I'm different, just as different as you are."
"And that's why we can't be friends. Because I've changed." She replied quietly.
"Sakura! Please, I'm asking for ten minutes…"
"I'm sorry." She said as she brushed past him before he could see the wavering in her eyes.
Sakura ordered the most potent thing she was legally allowed to ingest and sat back. She wanted desperately to listen to him…to comfort him…maybe even hold him…but that wasn't possible. Just being in the same room hurt….
"Sakura."
She turned to the familiar voice.
"Kakashi." She nodded.
"What are you doing here alone. It's dangerous for you to be out alone at night."
Sakura growled, leaving no confusion as to the fact he had better rectify his statement.
"I'm not questioning your abilities, just your tolerance for alcohol." He replied.
"Well don't."
"You've been quiet."
"And?"
"We're just a little worried about you."
"Your concerns are misplaced."
"Are they? You've hardly left your apartment since Sasuke returned."
"Kakashi." She growled again, warning him to back off.
"I can't have my cell malfunctioning."
"I see." Sakura stood, her voice slightly higher than before. "So this is about your cell."
"Sakura…"
"No, Kakashi, no more. I'm sick of hearing about Naruto and Sasuke's progress. I get it. I doesn't matter how far I go, it will never be good enough for you because you have the infamous Uchiha Sasuke and the maverick Uzumaki Naruto. Well, guess what, I don't need any of you. Not the way you've needed me, to heal your every wound, to siphon out the poisons you encounter. I'm your fall back plan. That's all I'll ever be for you. And guess what? Your fall back just walked out." She replied before turning and walking through the doors.
Sakura packed her things, told Gaara she was heading home, left a note for Naruto and Sai, and headed back towards Konoha.
She was sick of being the weak one…no matter how strong she was. And she was done catering to them in hopes of eventual acceptance.
Kakashi had thought it wise to give her some space and let her cool down. But when Gaara informed him off her unplanned departure, he realized that had been the last thing she needed because she had interpreted his distance as a 'yes.'
Naruto and Sai naturally panicked, but Sasuke made the decision to pursue her, telling Kakashi, Naruto, and Sai that they still needed to complete the mission. He would be fine.
"Are you sure?" Naruto asked.
"It's not an issue." The Uchiha replied.
"Watch out for her right hook." Sai shrugged.
'What?' Sasuke thought, but thinking better of it, he didn't ask questions.
Sakura swung herself upon onto a branch and continued without so much as a second thought—she moved instinctually now.
Not like in her genin days…
'No!' She though furiously. The last thing she was going to do was let them bother her.
But…maybe she was bothering herself…maybe….maybe she was still hurting…maybe she still lacked the confidence they had…
Maybe…they just weren't ready. Maybe none of them were ready….
She sank back against a tree trunk, wrapping her arms around her chest and weeping.
Why couldn't she move past what she was? Why couldn't she see herself the way Lady Tsunade did?
Sorry about the sad end. But its not over yet! Sakura is just now coming to terms with her own emotions. But maybe a certain Uchiha can help her along. Hint, Hint...