-
It's been hours. Hours stacked on top of one another.
I've been tired. I've been aching. I've been suffering.
I've been scared.
I've been confused.
It happens to the best of us.
Even if it didn't, who's to stop me from saying it is? This is my dream, after all. My fantasy.
My nightmare.
The sun is setting over the horizon. An orange hue shining over at me through the trees.
I haven't been this awe-struck since I noticed the beauty in the rock.
I'm starting to notice there's beauty in everything. Even the ugly shit I don't want to think about. Like the light. Or Rotor.
Rotor. Laying over there behind that tree. I can feel his presence without looking. I thought he would have disappeared by know, but I guess I was wrong.
Hmph. Whatever. Stay there if you want, imaginary body. You aren't bothering me any.
I reach in my jean pockets and dig around all the junk I keep on me.
As luck would have it, I have a book of matches. This means fire. This means warmth. This means light.
Light. Hm. Seems significant.
Whatever. Doesn't matter.
Don't worry about it.
I'm hungry, but the idea of food is sickening. That ever happen to you?
My stomach growls at me, in protest. Shut the fuck up, I can't do anything for you.
You're just pissing me off, stomach.
It growls again. It has a point, but I can't hunt. I sure as fuck can't go back to Knothole. Shit, I have no idea where I am right now.
East, right?
It seems like I'm east. Which way does the sun set? Fuck. I knew I should have paid attention to that shit.
I don't even know where the information initially came from. What day is it? Wednesday?
I guess days are meaningless when it's a dream. Or am I just saying that?
Shoving comfort up my nose?
I wish I was home. This dream gets boring and it doesn't end. I've been trying to ride it out for ages.
I keep hearing noises in the brush. It's fucking with me. Can't stop thinking about it. What could it be?
Some little animal? The wind?
Mobian?
Fuck, I don't know. I don't want to think about it, but my mind keeps coming back to it. Every time I try to dodge a thought it makes me think about it even more.
It's starting to piss me off.
I wonder how Rotor is doing over there.
"Oh, I'm just fucking great, Vernon."
Heh. Sarcasm.
"Ass!"
You can't blame me.
"I can and I do."
Ouch. After all we've been through together?"
"When did you start talking?
"What?"
"Never mind. Don't worry about it."
"I've been trying not to, Rotor. Hard."
"That might be your problem. Avoiding things."
"Nah. I think it would be figuring them out."
"The answer is pretty clear, Vernon. Crystal clear."
"Explain it, then."
"I cannot."
"Why?"
"You still refuse to accept it."
"I can't accept something I don't understand."
"Exactly."
"What?"
"…"
"What is that supposed to mean?"
Nothing. He ignores me.
"Rotor! What the fuck did that mean?"
I get up and walk towards him.
"You think just because you're 'dead' that you can ignore me? Answer me you fucker!"
Kicking him, he doesn't respond. He just sits there.
Lifeless.
Sigh.
I'm lonely.
I wish everyone wasn't a fucking nut job in your dreams.
I managed to start the fire after accidentally burning up the entire fucking match book.
The crackling fire pops while illuminating my meager camp site.
Sleeping is going to a be a bitch tonight. A total fucking whore, if you know what I mean.
Who am I kidding? Of course you know what I mean. I know what I mean. That must mean you know what I mean. Know what I mean? Of course you do.
Gah. I'm so tired. But sleep is out of the question.
Out of physical reach entirely. It kind of pisses me off.
It's a little bullshit, if you ask me. If I ask myself. I do.
Damn. I wish I knew what time it was. I don't know why I would need to but I guess it would just be nice to know. It's weird.
I can't explain it. I don't want to. Don't worry about it.
For some reason, I taste blue. But why? Is it the wind? The air?
Is the sky calling me? I don't hear shit…
Weird.
That shit ever happen to you?
….
Who the fuck am I talking to?
Bring justice back.
These words ring in my head, but why?
And where the fuck has justice been off to?
Strange sounds throughout the night.
Rustling leaves. It's to loud not to be mobian.
Fuck investigating. I just hope whoever that is doesn't find me here.
Whatever they bring with them, I don't want. Fuck that.
This is my head. I'm on my own.
Prithee, my dear
Why are we here?
Nobody knows.
We go to sleep.
Sleep was achieved. Though I feel far from restored.
In fact, I feel like three hundred pounds of shit in a half-ounce bag. That's how I feel.
And the worst part is, I don't even know where the fuck I am. Or why I'm in the woods. Why am I in the woods? This is fucking ridiculous.
What's going on?
This is some unfunny joke, or something. But why?
Why can't I remember shit?
My name is Vernon. I know where I live. I know all about me. But what the fuck is going on? It's as if I were thrown into some sort of situation, and told to deal with it while having no experience or idea whatsoever with what is happening.
Fuck. This is such bullshit.
Why can't I remember why I'm in the fucking woods? You would think that would be an easy one.
God. How did I even get out here? Which direction do I walk to get back to Knothole?
The sun. It rises in the east? West? Fuck. I knew I should have paid more attention to that type of shit. Have I lived this moment before? What's the term for that shit?
I can't figure anything out today. I'm stuck on retarded.
At a time like this. When thinking is critical.
I need to get my wits about me. Okay. I just need to examine the area. Study my surroundings.
I check the canteen around my left shoulder. Fucking empty.
Great.
My head hurts. Pounding and aching. A ringing in my head. It shakes my teeth.
I need some fucking water. I just really need some fucking water right now.
I fucking need it.
Looking around, I see something, or… someone?
Rotor?
His shoulder pokes out from the side of a tree.
Oh thank god! I'm not alone.
That makes me so happy.
"Rotor!"
No response. I feel funny about approaching him.
I almost don't want to.
Maybe I shouldn't.
"Rotor?"
Nothing. Maybe he's asleep. I don't want to disturb him? Maybe I should just stand back.
Wait…
"Rotor?"
I don't know what the fuck to do. What the fuck do I do? Who am I asking?
Alright. I'm going to approach him.
Slowly, I make my way over to him sideways
Peaking around the tree to see him, I- FUCK!
Shit! Shit!!
I'm at a loss for words. Confused and scared. I don't know what to make of this. Is this real?
No. It can't be.
I don't want it to be.
I refuse to accept this.
That is not what it looks like. It can't be.
Oh fuck.
Looking at his shoulder, I notice the canteen strap…
Water. I need it.
He has some. He doesn't need it.
Why does my head hurt so bad?
Fuck! Rotor is dead, and I'm contemplating taking his water!
What the fuck is wrong with me?
Okay. So there is the possibility that this is real. That is out there. If this is real, on the off chance that it is, the first question I need to be asking is who could have done this? And when? They could still very well be around. The could be after me, as well. But why didn't they take me out, too?
Are they fucking with me? Is this some game?
Some sick demented fucking game?
I'm hoping this is some fucked off dream. I really am.
Leaning forward to relieve him of his canteen, I hesitate.
It's like I just don't want to touch him. I just really don't want to confirm that he's real. I'm afraid of that, I think.
If I can touch him and feel him, than he might be real. We couldn't have that.
But above my own personal desires, I NEED THAT FUCKING WATER!
This is beyond me.
I snatch the water from his shoulder, and let out a high pitch yelp when I discover that I can in fact touch him, so he is in fact real.
I grab the strap and pull hard. I have to get the fuck out of here.
The strap snags on the back of his head, and I cry out as I have to double back, and remove the strap.
After that I run.
Fuck it.
I'm out of here. No looking back.
I think I'm going west.
I've been wandering for hours.
My legs are exhausted, but at least my headache is gone.
I drank some water. I feel better.
Rotor actually had a full canteen. I was so relieved.
It feels like I'm floating.
Mmm.
I want to call out for help, but for all I know that could be calling unwanted attention. I'm incredibly paranoid at this point. Someone has beaten my comrade's face through the back of his head, and I don't have the slightest idea who or why.
Or why I was spared.
Maybe he's after me. Maybe he isn't.
We'll find out soon enough.
Rotor.
I just can't wrap my head around it. I don't know how to feel.
I can't seem to convince myself it's real. I mean, why would something like that just happen?
Was I hallucinating? Was the lack of water getting to me?
Maybe I'm mad. Maybe I'm dreaming.
I don't know. I might not ever.
Over the horizon, through the trees I can make out Knothole in the distance.
I've made it.
"Hello?"
I've never seen Knothole this quiet during the day time. Not ever.
"Hello?!"
Nothing. Silence.
Not so much as a fucking tumbleweed.
The air is still. Stale, almost. Stagnant.
Is that the word? Doesn't matter.
"Hello?!"
Making my way past the desolate huts. Most the doors are open. One has been kicked in. What the fuck? Isn't this around where the princess lived?
Shit.
This is… I don't know what the fuck this is. I think that might be the problem.
It's what I'll blame. That's for fucking sure.
Looking straight ahead, I see the a stage in the distance. What's that there in the center? A crumpled heap surrounded by what looks like rocks.
I want to investigate, but my body has gone cold. Still.
Almost can't move. Or is it that I don't want to?
I'm such a coward.
I want to know but I don't. What the fuck is wrong with me?
Conflicted.
I should already know, anyway. It's my fucking head.
But I don't.
I must be hiding things from me. But why? For the better?
Fuck it. Let's go.
I mean I'm going.
Alright. Force myself to walk forward, approaching the stage. I keep my eyes on my feet, as I make my way up to the side, and hop up.
Directing my gaze upwards, I see it. Her.
Sally. Princess Sally.
The crumpled heap in the center of the stage. The only person in the whole town.
Dead. Fucking dead.
But why?
And why her?
Flashes. Snippets come back.
Tomorrow we take back Mobotropolis.
But why is Sally dead? Why would that happen?
I can't fit the pieces together. And I keep fucking losing them. There's something extremely frustrating about this shit, that I'm not even aware of.
I can't help but stare at her. The look of terror in her face. What happened?
I feel like I should know, for some reason. But why?
I pick up a rock. The rock has been stained red.
Gosh.
I drop it.
I need to get out of here. I need to find the others.
Robotropolis. That's north.
Maybe they did it. Perhaps they actually took the city back.
I made sure to grab a lot of water before leaving.
Three canteens.
I need it.
Not sure why, but I can't feel my face.
My head still hurts, though. How does that work?
I can feel my face twitching through the numbness of it.
What the fuck?
I need some more water.
Take a long sip from the canteen.
I feel better. More relaxed. My steps are lighter. It almost feels like I'm floating. Gliding along, maybe.
Pins and needles in all four limbs. Tensing my hands is almost unbearable. Each step feels weird as shit, increasing the odd sensation.
That whole gliding thing was short lived. Now walking sucks.
I don't know how far I've gotten. I just keep walking north. Is Robotropolis really this far away? Shit.
I keep thinking of Sally. Pictures of her face flashing in my mind. Surprised.
Scared.
Terrified.
What did she see? I wonder.
What scared her so badly?
Is it something I'm looking for? Something I'm missing?
Something I don't see, that's for sure. Something I don't currently understand.
Something I may never understand. But I have to try, you know?
My thoughts f
eel broken up. That eve
r happen to you? It's pret
ty fucking weird. I can'
t really explai
n it. You g
et what I'
m scrat
chin
g at?
??
?
?
?
?
?
My mind is a blank. I'm just walking at this point. But why?
I haven't thought about it.
Something about bringing justice back, I think.
I'm not sure I understand it. I'm just grateful to have some sort of purpose in the world, I suppose.
I can't explain it.
It's like; something to be proud of? No. No, that's not it.
It's weird. I'm not sure I understand it, myself.
It just is. You know?
It just is.
Trees are pretty.
Sun is pretty, too.
More water.
Mmmm.
Sun is pretty, but hurts to stare at.
I guess it's too pretty.
Look at the ground.
The leaves are pretty, even in death.
Death. It makes me sad.
The world is dim.
I look up into the sun again.
Floaters and spots invade my vision. My eyes chase them, but they never stop running.
My legs hurt. I want to sit, but I can't.
I won't. I refuse.
Dirt is pretty. I like it.
Is anything not pretty?
That would be just terrible.
Hmmm….
Where am I walking to, again?
Scaling this steep ass rocky hill isn't fun, as pretty as the thing is.
Was. It was pretty from far away. Now it just sucks.
Every time I look up, it seems like no progress has been made.
I've been climbing for what has felt like hours, and I'm not even half way.
Fuck.
Oh well.
Bummer may Horus.
I've reached the top.
The view is magnificent.
There it is.
I think.
The mechanical city.
It's so pretty from back here. Up here
It looks barren, though. Lifeless.
I wonder why.
Hope that the mission was successful.
In all likeliness it did. It's my dream, after all.
I can will shit to happen, right?
Right.
As if I needed confirmation.
Because I don't. This is my brain. My brain. I have shit under control.
The city is getting closer, as I carefully step my way down the long, steep hill.
A tumble down this hill could be fatal. If this weren't a dream, of course.
But it is.
But still..
Better not chance it.
Right?
Uh.. Right.
The city gets closer and closer with every step.
It's so close; resolution.
I can feel it.
It's so close I can taste it, you know?
There has to be some sort of answer. Some sort of resolution. I'm the protagonist to the story that my own mind has created; there has to be an answer.
I couldn't let a mystery like this go unsolved.
Not even entirely sure that I remember the mystery; just that it needs to be solved.
By someone.
By me.
It's my job. My purpose.
The justification of my existence.
The whole reason for my being.
I have to hold on. I have to see it through.
I have to find answers.
Here and now.
The city is getting closer.
I can smell it; quite literally.
The smell of sulfur and smog.
The city leaves the taste of gray in my mouth. I don't care for the taste of gray at all.
Ashy.
Unpleasant.
The city gets larger. Closer.
How long have I been walking?
Do I need rest?
I can't tell.
It's odd.
Before I know it, the city is right on top of me.
Or I'm on top of it, rather.
Something of that nature.
Basically it means that I'm here.
And it looks dead.
Just as dead as Knothole.
"Hello?"
It's a big city. Perhaps a meeting is being held?
A celebration indoors?
Who knows?
I don't see any robots, though. Don't see any mobians, either.
Hell.
What am I doing?
Stopped. I need to sit down, or I need water, or… something.
I already drank two of the canteens.
I've been thirsty, I guess you could say.
Craving water.
Needing it.
Just like the purpose.
Sitting here makes me uncomfortable.
I need to be moving I think. Sitting still doesn't feel right.
Maybe I can walk it off?
Who knows. Maybe.
Shit.
Standing up, I hear a grunt.
Who was that?
"Hello?!"
…
Was that me?
Do I sound like that?
Uh.
I need to walk.
Now.
I need to get the fuck out of here. This place.
Need to find someone or
something.
Walking as fast as I can through the desolate city, I look up to the sky.
I never noticed how beautiful it was before with the clouds like that an-
WHAT THE FUCK!?
Thud
…
I.
.
.
My leg hurts.
That's the first thing I notice.
That my leg hurts. A lot.
Opening my eyes, I notice the walls around me. Not walls, but… dirt?
A hole in the ground. A big one.
Very carefully dug.
Very precisely dug.
My head hurts, too, but not like my leg.
Look down at it.
I don't think it's supposed to bend in that direction.
After throwing up, I notice what's under my leg.
Another leg. Other limbs.
Belonging to other people.
Oh god.
They belong to other people.
I would throw up again, but there isn't anything in my stomach so I just gag painfully over and over again, my eyes filling with water. My vision blurring.
The stench choking me.
This is the worst nightmare ever.
drank a lot of water
now feel okay
the bodies are soft.
okay to lay on.
they make me feel sick.
I don't like them, but
I can't leave them.
they make me sad.
I need more water.
I know these people.
I know them, but I can't remember their names.
that ever happen to you?
it bugs the shit out of me.
I wonder who they is.
do do do da da da do da.
lalalalalalalaaaa……..
humm
singing pass time
sleeping pass time.
cant sleep.
not like always.
not like should.
dont like.
want to leave, but cant
this stupid.
is.
so hungry
so desperate for food.
do desperate things.
try eat old friends.
they no taste good.
they just come back up.
they come back up red.
I'm out of water….
been out of water
make me sad.
that was all I had left….
I can't sleep anymore. That gets me nowhere.
Looking up, I notice the bright light shining in my face.
But wasn't it night time?
I think I'm finally waking up……………… . …….. . . .. …. ….. ………. .. .. …. .. .. .. .. . .. .. . .. … . . ….. .. . . . . ….. …. … ….. …. ….. …. …… ….. ….. ….. ….. … …… ….. ….. ….. ….. …. …… ….. ….. …. ………. …… ……… ……….. …………. ….. …………….. …… .. .. .. . .. . . .