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A Million Pieces

"Why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying!" She jerked her head up from it's resting place on her knees and stared at the young man in front of her, tears still streaming down her face. But he didn't sit down next to her, he just stared at her with a sad expression on his face. In the back of her mind, Rose knew what was going on, she'd had the dream before, but it wasn't going the way it always did.

"Why won't you sit next to me?" She asked, feeling the lump in her throat grow with each word. His expression grew more agonized.

"You won't let me."

Rose's eyes snapped open and started to focus in the dimly lit dormitory. It took a few moments of her staring, wide eyed to realize that her cheeks were wet. And it took her just a few moments longer to realize that they were wet from her own tears. Instantly, she sat up, a hand flying to her face. After the initial surprise faded, she was faced with the oddest feeling of sadness. And that's when she remembered the dream. It was an hour before she actually had to get up and start getting ready, but she knew there was no hope of going back to sleep. And she was sure she didn't want to. Her dreams had a nasty habit of replaying themselves all night. Quickly but carefully, Rose hopped up from her bed and stumbled to the bathroom. It would probably be another half an hour before her fellow Gryffindor girls would start to wake, and she wanted to make sure she was fully recovered before they could get suspicious.

It wasn't totally unlike Rose to get up early and study, after all. She did have a History of Magic exam today. She could play it off. All she had to do was pull herself together.

After cranking the hot water nob all the way up in the shower, Rose stepped in. Her once wet and sticky cheeks quickly turned back to normal as the water did it's job. But what the water couldn't fix was the unshakable feeling of sadness that still had a hold of her. Dreams had a funny hold over a person. For Rose, it wasn't ever so much what actually happened in the dream, it was the overall tone of the dream. She had just felt so sad. She couldn't remember a time where she had woken up from a dream crying.

Rose remembered having a dream similar to that before. Back when she first met Scorpius, when her mother first told her to stay away from him. And then every time she was forced to listen to every stupid story about how awful the Malfoy family was. But they had never made her that sad before. In her past dreams, he had always sat down beside her. It may not be a particularly moving dream to anyone else, but they always meant something to her. As she got older, the dreams were few and far between. When she did have them, often times she would just be frustrated or angry. Why was she still having these dreams of him? Since that day, she had tried everything to get him out of her head. Nothing really seemed to work, obviously. Just as she thought she was over it, the thoughts would come creeping back into her head.

The sound of the bathroom door opening brought Rose out of her thoughts and she stuck her face back underneath the hot water. It was going to get crowded soon, and she didn't want to be in the way of the girl's "beauty time". That was a potentially dangerous situation, she'd done it before. After shutting off the water, she wrapped a towel around herself and went to get dressed before she stuck her face in her History of Magic notes.

--

"You still have detention?" Roxanne groaned across the dinner.

"Yep." Rose nodded over her soup.

"It's been like two weeks!"

"Look." Rose paused, setting her spoon down. "I'd rather have two more months of detention than do another bloody pregnancy test." The memory sent shudders down her spine, but it caused both Dom and Roxanne to laugh.

"I can't believe your mom made you take three." Roxanne said after her laughter had subsided.

"I'm just glad I didn't have to see my dad's face when she told him I might be pregnant with a Malfoy child." The redheaded shrugged, picking up her spoon again.

"I don't get it." her ebony skinned cousin suddenly declared. "How can Al be best friends with Malfoy, but you can't have anything to do with him? I mean, his dad had it out for Uncle Harry the most, right? Why are your parents still holding on to old grudges?" Rose stared at her, dumbly. In one breath, she had just expressed every question that Rose didn't want to think about.

"Don't get me wrong, I know you hate him!" Roxanne said, mistaking her stare for something else, "I'm just saying, you know. It's weird." She finished her sentence quietly before digging back into her food. Rose blinked a few times before answering.

"Oh...yeah, I don't know. I think it's the way he still treats my mum. At the office and stuff." She muttered into a spoonful of soup. The trio was silent for a moment longer, each consumed by their own thoughts.

"Oh, bullocks." Dom said suddenly, "I have to go. Potions tutoring." She finished, grimly.

"Geez, Dom, you've had tutoring every night this week." Rose stated, looking up from her empty bowl.

"Well it's not quite the same as writing lines in detention." Dom sneered, causing Rose to stick her tongue out at the girl. "I'll see you later."

"Speaking of which." Roxanne started, watching her blonde cousin hurry out of the Great Hall, "Rosie...when does your detention start again?"

"Oh bloody -- "

--

"Late again, Miss Weasley?" Professor Crisswell mused from his paperwork. The Defense Against the Dark Arts professor had always been one of her favorites, so Rose didn't really mind being in detention with him.

Except for today.

The flash of platinum blonde hair sitting in the classroom was enough to make her want to run screaming.

"Well?" The professor looked up at the girl, "Your usual seat, please."

"Uh -- sorry." She muttered, casting her gaze downward and shuffling to the desk she always sat in. Unfortunately, it was only two seats away from the very last person she had wanted to see.

"You know the drill. I want a thousand lines of "I will not fight". Then you can go." Rose nodded and got out some parchment and her quill.

"Back to work, Mr. Malfoy." Rose's eyes snapped in his direction before she could even think about it. Scorpius had been looking at her, but for how long? Was it just an innocent glance, like every student was guilty of when another person walked into their classroom? But his restrained grin told her otherwise. He wanted to talk to her, she knew it.

Rose had been avoiding him since the party, and she was pretty good at it. Of course, she hadn't seen the grounds in a while. Most of her avoidance plan consisted of her hiding in the Seventh Year Gryffindor girl's dorm. The whole "pregnancy" incident actually helped her in avoiding the boy. Now she didn't have to think of a lie to tell Dom in order for her help in getting Malfoy to stay away. How oddly things were falling into place.

Until now, of course.

All Rose had to do was just write extra slow tonight. He would have to leave when he was finished writing his lines, and she would have to stay. Perfect plan. Rose smiled to herself as she picked up her quill and slowly began to write.

--

"Merlin you to are slow tonight!" Professor Crisswell yelled, two hours later. Rose jumped involuntarily at the volume of his voice. Apparently that had been the professor's intent, since she looked up to see him grinning. "Go, leave. I don't want you two falling asleep in my class tomorrow." Rose's eyes widened.

"But, Professor -- "

"I know you're an over achiever, Miss Weasley, but you really should take detention assignments so seriously."

"But -- "

"Go." He said, with a wave of his hand. Scorpius was already out of his seat, and handing his parchment to the teacher. He started to slowly gather his things, and Rose saw her only opportunity. Quickly, she threw her things in her bag, handed her assignment to Professor Crisswell and flew out the door. If she could just make it around the corner...

"Rose!" Damn.

She knew the boy couldn't be that far behind her, his legs were much longer. But the corner was just right there, she could hear a few people still in the Great Hall. She was picking up her speed when she felt his hand wrap around her wrist.

"Wait." He pleaded, but she turned around in a glare.

"Let go of me, Malfoy." She spat, continuing her glare. His face looked a little surprised at first, then amused, then the cocky smirk he always had on when they fought.

"Not until we talk."

"There's nothing to talk about!" Rose snapped, turning around and trying to wrench her wrist out of his hand. She heard him sigh behind her.

"Fine, we'll do it the hard way." Before she could demand he tell her what he meant by that, she found out. In a movement so fast it made her head spin, he lifted her off the ground and slung her over one of his shoulders.

"What the -- hell?! PUT ME DOWN!" Rose protested loudly, flailing her limbs pathetically. He carried her down the hallway, ignoring her protests, and she heard him kick open a door.

"Now, you're going to talk to me, or you're just going to have to stay on my shoulder all night." He said in a calm tone, despite how many times she had kicked him in the stomach. "I'm fine either way." She could hear the smirk in his voice and was immediately aware of how close his hand was to her rear end.

"Okay!" She yelled, kicking her legs again. "I'll talk to you! Just put me down!"

"Good." He said pleasantly, pulling her down from his shoulder, "And don't try to run, I'm stronger and faster than you."

"Not on the Pitch." Rose muttered, instinctively. When both of her feet were firmly planted on the floor, she saw the smirk that she so hated. Rather...she so wished that she hated. After blinking a few times, trying to get back the right mind set, she paced over to the window and turned back around. "What do you want?" Her tone was more hostile than anything else. Mainly because she hated the new feeling of being comfortable around him.

"We need to talk."

"You already said that, genius." The redhead raised her brow and crossed her arms, "About what?"

"You know what." He answered, all the humor in his expression gone. It took Rose a minute to get her thoughts together again.

"About you drinking the punch at the Ministry party? Yeah, you know you should never do that. Don't worry, though, I won't tell anyone. Let's just forget about it." She rambled as she headed towards the door, though she knew it wouldn't be that easy.

"Rose." His calm voice stopped her, and she rolled her eyes.

"What do you want me to say, Scorpius?" She sighed, then realized she had addressed him by his first name. But maybe her cover wasn't blown just yet. He seemed to enjoy calling her by her first name. She could just be...getting back at him.

Oh, her excuses weren't even fooling her. This was not going well.

"I want you to tell me what you're thinking" Oh, great. They were opening that can of worms.

"I'll let you know as soon as I figure it out."

"Rose."

"Stop saying my name!" She whipped around, suddenly angry. "What did you expect me to say? We've hated each other for years, fought every day, our parents hate each other! You were raised to hate my kind, and don't lie and say you weren't, because I've heard stories about your dad." He just stared at her with an unreadable expression.

"You think I'm my father?"

"We--...Well," She stuttered, a bit taken back by the way the conversation turned.

"Are you your mother?"

"No!" Rose yelled, a little offended. Most teenage girls didn't really enjoy being compared to their mothers.

"I never hated you, Rose." The Weasley opened her mouth to say something, but the closed it again. She looked at the floor, then sighed in great frustration.

"How do you feel right now?" She looked at him like he had just grown three extra faces.

"Annoyed!" Before she knew it, he had his arms wrapped around her in a hug. Her immediate and involuntary response was to tense every muscle in her body.

"Relax. There's no one else around." He was right, and for his sake, she slowly started to allow herself to relax. She would get this over with soon enough, if she would just go along with it, right?

"Now how do you feel?" He asked when he was sure she had calmed herself.

"Warmer than I was." She said, not pausing after his question.

"Not what I meant, Rose." He sighed, but held onto her, obviously waiting for a different answer. She sighed.

Weren't girls the usually the ones that wanted to talk about feelings? Rose hated talking about feelings, she avoided it as much as she could. She hated even thinking about it. Emotions made her feel weak, or embarrassed. She would much rather just joke her way out of the situation. Apparently that was not going to work tonight. So, she closed her eyes and opened up the box of emotions that she had always avoided opening. How did she really feel?

Well, she knew one thing. She was in no hurry to leave. Of course, she was still frustrated. But she realized now that she was more frustrated with herself than anything else. And then her mind wandered back to that day twelve years ago. Then the dream she had the other night. Why was Scorpius such a huge part of her life? He invaded her mind at some point every day. She got inexplicably angry every time she saw a girl throwing herself at him. She had never actually had a steady boyfriend before, because they never just seemed to match up to the standards in her head. Trying to picture herself with Scorpius, she realized --

"Oh...bullocks." She muttered, her eyes as big as half dollars.

"What?" He asked, looking down at her curiously. She pushed him away, her face incredulous.

"When the hell did I fall in love with you?!"

--

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