Jake's parents really seemed to hate Miley. "You're so weird!" Shouted his mom. "Why do you have to be going out with a celebrity? Sheesh!" Miley felt like punching Mrs. Ryan – do you blame her? Mr. Ryan seemed to think Miley was pretty but nothing special. "Kid, you've got guts for going out with my little boy." Through gritted teeth, Miley said, "He's not little. We're fifteen." Sheesh, will these people ever learn? )

Then, it was THE day – the day Miley announced Hannah's big news – that she was going to be a teen mother AND that she was really Miley Stewart, a fifteen-year-old girl with a double-life. She would start by singing Nobody's Perfect, then go to Miley's Mommy announcements (what the newspapers called Miley's news which Jackson reported to the paper), then, finally right after Miley would reveal her double-life.

Suddenly, a man came in. "Three minutes, Miss Montana," he said. His shirt said Lay Off, It's Monday! Miley had a good feeling he didn't want to be there, especially when she saw his nametag: "Hello! My name is Grumpy. How may I help you?" It made it worse that the next day Miley would have to go to school to be treated like Jake was when he first came.

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"Welcome to "Wake Up, It's Wendy!" I am your host, Wendy! Today, we have pop-diva Hannah Montana singing her song, "Nobody's Perfect, and then, Hannah has some big news for us – it's so big, I don't even know yet!" The audience laughed. Miley could barely see from where she was standing. There was pitch-black so no one could see her. "We will also have Jake Ryan on the show after Hannah announces her big news!" Miley strained to see through the black. She saw Lilly holding a poster that said, "GO HANNAH!!" She also saw Amber and Ashley wearing Hannah wigs and Amber's T-shirt said "We Will" while Ashley's said "Be There". Then the bottoms of the shirts said "HANNAH" – Amber's said Han while Ashley's said Nah. Even Oliver was there. He was just kind of smiling. Gas probably.

Miley heard the music to "Nobody's Perfect". Then, while still in the dark, she said, "Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone has those days." Finally, a spotlight was shined on her as she said, "1, 2, 3, 4!" She then came on stage to sing as the crowd went wild. When she sang, "If I'm not doing too well", she thought, You better BELIEVE I'm not doing well! I got kicked out of my house, and I have to reveal my biggest secret because of a human error! I HATE THIS! She found herself crying but no one noticed.

Finally, after what seemed like a LIFETIME, she finally sang, "Nobody's! Perfect! No, no! Nobody's Perfect!" And the audience clapped and cheered. "HAN-NAH! HAN-NAH! HAN-NAH!" Some people shouted. Then she sat down next to Wendy. "Well, Hannah, that might have been your biggest hit EVER! But still, why DID you choose to SING it?" "Well, Wendy, it's a big, trust me, BIG reason. And me and Jake want to tell it. Also, the reason is my big news." "Well, THIS is A FIRST on "Wake Up, It's Wendy!" But, sure, Jake CAN come out HERE!"

Jake walked on stage and still more people cheered. "So Hannah, Jake, what IS the big news AND the REASON you've chosen to sing "Nobody's Perfect?" "Well," said Jake, which made a nod towards Miley and she said. "I've had a double-life as Hannah Montana while my real name is Miley Stewart." The sound of at least 1,000 dropping mouths was heard as Miley pulled off her wig. No one said anything. "SHOCKER!" Shouted out Wendy. "But Miley, WHY would you WANT everyone to KNOW that?" Asked Wendy. (Just so you know, the reason some of Wendy's parts are in capitals is because she sometimes talks loud on "Wake Up, it's Wendy!")

"Well, Wendy, I didn't WANT people to know, but I had to tell because me, Miley, Hannah, whatever, are pregnant."

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As Miley walked into her Social Studies class on Monday, three words were on the board: Annelies Marie Frank. Mr. Corelli turned. "Class, we are going to be reading about Anne Frank, who, unlike some of us," The teacher looked at Miley, "Did NOT reveal she was pregnant at age fifteen."

Miley sank lower in her chair; embarrassed her teacher would mention it. "Now class, we will be reading The Diary Of Anne Frank because your teachers didn't make you last year." "Great," Mumbled Miley, "I'll have nine months to read it." "Quiet Stewart, or should I say Montana."

Miley scribbled something on a piece of paper. "Amber," She whispered, "Pass this to Lilly." Amber took it and passed it to Lilly. "Lilly," She whispered. She took it from Amber's hands. Lilly unfolded it and read:

"Anne Frank didn't announce she was pregnant at fifteen."

Lilly covered up a giggle with some coughing, because, there, next to the message, was a drawing of their teacher – a funny one. "Truscott, do you need a Kleenex?" "No, I'm fine." Another giggle.

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"And then, do you know what he said next Jake?" Miley and Jake were talking on the phone. Imitating her teacher, she said, "We are going to be reading about Anne Frank who unlike some of us didn't reveal she was pregnant at fifteen! Can you believe it?"

Jake began to giggle. "JAKE! Can't you ever be serious?" Jake laughed. "Sorry, Miley, but it was SO dang funny!" "Ugh! Can't I trust anyone?" Jake stopped. "Sorry, Miley, I'll be over in a little while to help you enjoy your last days at home, okay?" Miley smiled. Sometimes Jake could be a pain in the butt, but right now he was nice. "Sure."

Ten minutes later, Jake was at the door, and Jackson opened it. "So," he said. "You made up Jake so you could keep Leslie a secret." "Jackson, where'd you hear that?" Jackson grinned. "Miley's diary. Boy, that thang is JU-ICY!" Jake – I mean Leslie (isn't this fun?) – rolled his eyes. "Hey, is Miley here?" Jackson looked impatient. "Where else would she be? Scotland?" Jake gave Jackson a dirty look. "Fine, fine. She's watching Desperate Housewives while my dad says how stupid it would be to live on Wisteria Lane."

Jake walked out and saw Snowbell, or whatever his name was, Thor's pet. "Hey, Miley," he said sweetly. "Hey, Jake." She moved over so he would have room on the couch. Robby Ray clicked off Desperate. "Finally an excuse to watch The Ringer." He got out a DVD with Johnny Knoxville on the front. He popped it into the DVD player. Jackson walked out. "Hey, Miles," he asked. "Did you think of names yet?" He looked impatient.

"Yeah," She said, "I just found out today that it's a girl, so her name's going to be Kaylana Becky or possibly Montana Becky, you know, for Hannah Montana. But we're probably going to call her Becky."

"Becky with the bad breath." "JACKSON! That was so mean!" Jackson looked evil (mwah hah hah hah!). "It wasn't me!" "Brainless Becky, brainless Becky." She threw a pillow at him. "Miley, it wasn't me!" "Well then, who was it? Your imaginary friend Bobo?" Jackson looked crushed. "Hey, I left Bobo back in Tennessee!"

"Jackson, I heard you talking to Bobo just last night! What you think I am?" "Stupid birdbrain!" "Ugh!" Suddenly Snowbell opened his cage and flew out. "Brainless Miley, brainless Miley!" Jackson laughed. "You got that right. Want some ice cream, anyone?" Suddenly, on the TV in The Ringer, that one guy said, "WHEN THE FUCK DID WE GET ICE CREAM?!" Everyone started laughing.

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A few weeks later, Miley went to a checkup for her baby. The doctor had her lay down and put that weird stuff on her stomach. "How you doing, Miley?" The doctor's name was Fickle; Ally Fickle. She was a woman only 23 years old and then she looked 16. She was really pretty. She resembled Kelly Clarkson, except she was Spanish – a Spanish Kelly!

"I'm fine." She nodded. "Good. Have you had any weird cravings lately?" Jake said, "Well, this morning I wanted a hotdog with baked beans on it…." "She was talking to me stupid birdbrain." Jake had to smile. The stupid birdbrain was still fresh in his mind.

She turned her attention back to Ally. "Actually, this morning I wanted a smoothie made of ketchup and relish." Jake turned the color of relish – poor guy. "Miley, that's nasty! Couldn't you have any other weird cravings?" She smiled. "Nope." She loved making Jake sick, though the results weren't always pleasant – far from it.

"Okay," Said Dr. Fickle – LOL, how funny! "We're just going to look at old Kaylana here, and, oh my…." Miley was suddenly alert. "Is there something wrong with Kaylana, anything?" "Well, she's fine, but…I'm just not sure about the others."

"Oh, thank heavens, I…what others?!" "Well, it looks like you're not having one baby, but…two, no, wait…three, no, that's wrong…four, no, not yet…five babies!" Miley began to cry. "But we weren't even expecting one!" "It's okay. If you want, you could still have that abortion." "That's killing!" She said. She wasn't too fond of killing. She had wrote a poem about abortion once:

Abortion, A Poem

By Miley Stewart

Today a girl found out she was pregnant

And only at fifteen

What could she do?
There was only one option, it seemed:
An abortion.

She went to the doctor,

She went to the nurse

And she wasn't too happy

About losing money from her purse.

This girl was far too selfish.

She sat on the table,

Ready to kill

What would have been

The world's most gorgeous little girl.

It was two hours later…

The girl walked home,

Thinking over the "smart" choice she made.

How she wished she wouldn't have

Killed that girl today!

Don't get an abortion, the real word is killing.

She remembered it all too well. She sighed. "Well, don't sweat the small stuff." Jake said. She nodded. "Right." Miley looked at Ally. "The genders?" "Already checked, while you were thinking. All girls." Miley thanked her and they went home.

"Miley, do you have any other names?" She nodded. "Well, of course Kaylana, and then Montana, Bridget, Amelia, and Destiny." Jake laughed. "I meant full names." Miley laughed at her own stupidity. "I was thinking Kaylana Becky, Montana Julie, Bridget Sarah, Amelia Marie, and Destiny Amanda." Jake nodded, and kissed Miley. What happened next was almost like a nightmare.