Ok, sorry , was getting ready for the holiday the last several days. I am very thankful school resumes

tomorrow, LOL . Love my kids, but OMG!!!! , they need to go back to school ;) . Ok, so , I hope you've

been waiting , and wondering , what's going to happen (I've chewed my nails down to the quick) Well,

I really don't know whats going on either, not until my finger's type it !! Itailic's going to show memories.

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Of course the wonderful and talented SMeyer owns all we love. But , she lets us have our moments with

them, she's is really very unselfish!!!

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LOVE LOST ?? OR JUST SCREWED UP??!!!!!

So, I ran..... I know ,I know.... WHAT ELSE IS NEW EDWARD??!!!! I can't really remember how long I

was out of it. Running ...... get away from the pain...run run run.... so I did. I finally stopped at one of

most favored hunting areas, just on the other side of Canada and U.S. border. But , I hadn't come to enjoy

a hunt. No , I came to enjoy my misery! My knowledge that because of what we are, well what I am... I

have turned my Bella into same indulgent, selfish monster!! And ,.... well drove her into my brothers' arms!!!

Arms , that I want to rip off and torch with the rest of him!!

His hands continued to tease , slowly running over her obvious wet lips...moaning " oh yes Em, please now!!"

At her encouragement , he slides one of his big beafy fingers down her slit , while another seems to tickle

her swollen clit , making her wither and moan even more......

Dam... I can't seem to stop remembering. My phone starts to beep AGAIN!! I look at it, not really seeing it

at first. Seeing Alice's smiling face pop-up on the small screen, my eyes become even more unfocused.

Trembling, I squeeze thesmall phone until its a pile of metal and wires , throwing it as far from me as I possibly

can. "NOOOOOOOOO!!" , I yell , "Stay the fuck out of my head!!!". Not for the first time in my existense, I curse

my "GIFT". Not wanting to hear anyone....but its almost impossible. I can hear yelling and crying.....pleading

for me to come home. Deep growls coming out from some where deep inside me...... STOP!!!!.

She gasps as his fingers continue to move on her , fingers in her moving ,slowly. His tongue follows the path

his fingers had just followed , stopping to flick against her oversensitized nub...." ohhhhhh,,,,,mmhhhmmm.",

bucking her hips up against his mouth, 'purrrsssss' , "oh yessss"......

I throw back my head , "BELLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAA" , ......my knees buckling out from under me. I lay in

the grass.....unmoving.....just surrounded by pain, almost if I was being ' turned ' again!!!! Ohhh... my dear goddess,

what have I done to deserve this??!!!! Why,...... growling and moaning , dry sobs seem to burst up through my

chest , making me shake even more. I layed there , for hours , days?? I really can't comprehend anything,

my pain is so great. Family faces and voices are fading .... " thank you for that" , I thought.

As I had been watching , I had most surreal thought , hmmm.. dam Emmette , I always pictured you as the

proverbial ' wham-bam thank you mam '. I had chuckled , well .... for decades ... the way he and Rose where

, well.... they were just so SEXUAL with each other....and the climpses I would allow to look at , well ... not

very tender. But , as I stood watching him with my Bella...... he was amazingly tender and loving........

The next half will be from the family , their thoughts and discoveries.

CARLISLE:

It's been two weeks!! We haven't heard anything from Edward. Nothing, no phone calls or anything from

Alice's visions either. It's as if , well....as if ' doesn't want to exist anymore' I'm terrified... my first son , my
Edward !!!

ESME:

Where's my child , my beautiful son?! Please dear God, keep him safe . Please.... let him find his way back

to us?! We ' need ' him, love him.... he's so very important to us all.

ALICE:

Ohhh myyy goddd, EDWARD !!! Answer me dam you?!! Please , Edward, please?!

JASPER:

Where is he?? Why can't I feel him?!! This painful....mourning is going to kill me. I can't stand to see my Alice

and everyone I love fall apart before my very eyes. I can feel them....

ROSALIE:

Why didn't I stop him?? Why.....oh god , Edward.... come home. We need you here to complete us.... we're not

the same. NO ONE !!! GOD DAMMIT , YOU PIG-HEADED , EGOTISTICAL ASS.........

EMMETTE:

Oh man Edward, we never..... well .... we love you . Please , come home .. we'll work everything out.! I know

we can. We all need you here... and dam... she..she's loosing herself . She hasn't been ANYTHING since you

left. DAMMIT, come back to us .... HER... we're loosing her dammit !!!

BELLA:

CARLISLE AGAIN:

Edward, I called the Denali's today, its been almost 3 weeks. Jasper and Emm...well your brothers are out scouting

for you AGAIN !! Please , call us or open to Alice. Edward..... Bella isn't ... well she's completely shut herself down.

Theres...nothing...she doesn't seem to be there anymore Edward...like a completely empty shell.

ALICE;

Almost a month now. No word from him. I sit and stare out the window , while I take my turn to sit with Bella. My

sister and my best friend in my existense. A painful moan escapes my lips, I quickly clamp shut my lips so no more

come. Jasper is just outside the door, there for me like he has been for six decades now. I told our family earlier, that

FINALLY!! , some very blurry scenes are starting to come to me. I still can't make out the area, but I know its him.....

Edward !! I can feel the jagging pain start in my chest as I think his name. Suddenly though, the pain and a quiet calm

come over me. "thank you my love." , loud enough for my Jazzy to hear me. Our once harmonious , happy family has

been in almost mournful existance. None of us able to knowing or understanding everything that has happened. Carlisle

has been studying and trying to find out why or frankly how its possible for Bella and Emmette ( and maybe another two!),

to be able to have this intimacy with more than one!! But , we are more concerned about what has happened to her since

Edward has left. Not one of us , with all of our centuries , together , have we heard or let alone dealt with this...this...

tragedy that has befallen our Bella!! She just well ...sort of literally turn to marble!! Unmoving , completely and utterly

still. I can't see a future for her....its very shadowy and dark. Its scarying the hell out of me! And Edward, well his has

become the same!!!!!! Her eyes go glassy...YES !!!! Oh thank you thank you. I turn to the beautiful creature laying on the bed,

" Bella , we've found him... our Edward... their bringing him home." I kiss her on the forehead and run out the door , grabbing

Jaspers hand , and flying down the steps to Carlisle's study. The phone is just ringing as I throw the door open ,yelling

for Rose , Esme and Emmette. Carlisle had jerked his head up as the door bounced off the wall, " It's Tanya, they found him!!" ,

I cried.

CARLISLE:

"Yes , yes , oh god , thank you Tanya!! Yes , well.... Jasper and Emmette will come immediately. Yes , just carefully move

him . Yes, I understand what your saying dear. I don't know... well ... it sounds just like whats happening here. No, theres

been no change to her for weeks now. Yes, yes.... we all send our love and thanks to you all. " Jasper , Emmette, you

have to go to Denali and bring Edward home. They found him...well its not important, but the FOUND him. His voice breaks,

He... Edward ... it sounds as if he is just like Bella. I watch my family, everyone becomes still for a seconds time. Then,

Rosalie states, that it doesn't matter, we'll have him home soon. Everyone agrees and hopes maybe this past month can

now begin to ....well heal us all ,especially the two whom seem to almost center us all.

Rosalie:

Within hours , Emmette and Jasper return. We're all waiting at the door , anxious and concerned that maybe sending

Emmette with Jazz , well... maybe wasn't exactly the best thing. But..... as Emmette walks through the door, carrying Edward,

that thought and all other thoughts disappear. Oh dear lord!! Edward??! I look around , and yet ... no one can seem to say

anything at first. Esme is sobbing quietly as she looks at her first son.....her joy .....Alice , sweet tiny Alice...seems to be lost

in her cloudy-eyed gaze, looking or better yet almost DEMANDING a vision to help us understand. And Carlisle , our father,

our glue...seems to grumble at first as he looks at his first and favorite son. "Take him up stairs Em", I said quietly, "Lay

him beside her. Maybe...." , a sob drags it way out..."maybe being together will help?!" Emmette carries him quickly but

very tenderly upstairs to third floor. Then laying him down gently beside Bella.

JASPER:

Then pain and despair !! Just following from everyone. From the moment we arrived at the Denali's and the moment we walked

in through the doors at home!! Its enough to cripple me. But....I can't let it.. my family needs me....my Alice needs me.

Watching Emmette , well its like watching someone slowly and throughly torment themselves into a living nightmare even

more than he was already living. He hasn't let me carry or even touch Edward since we got to Alaska. Watching him...I can

see and 'feel' how much he loves him. And I have seen both ways ,how much he loves Bella. As he laid him beside her...I

have a completely bizarre and horrible thought , "THIS MUST BE LIKE SEEING ROMEO AND JULIET'S FINAL CHAPTER" !!

CARLISLE:

Well, I have completely exhausted everything I have in trying to find out some type of ...CURE. I even have talked to numerous

friends that have existed centuries, hoping maybe they knew what I could do. Sitting here at my desk, staring out to nothing, I'm

lost and discouraged. With all my knowledge....my freakin' educational background.....NOTHING !! Which , well .... I haven't

completely used everything , well rather EVERYONE I know who might have the knowledge to help us!! But , at what cost will

I be entering into ,if and when, I do ??!! A knock comes at my door, "Yes?", Alice enters, followed by the rest of our family..well

not all . " Carlise?!", she says ," you have to call. You know this right? And... well , it looks like it might actually help!!" she excitedly

tells me. "What have you seen Alice?" , I had to find out , becoming slightly hopeful. "Welllll....of course he'll want something

from you, " yes yes ,of course I thought "but NOT one of us" Relaxing slightly at this bit of information, " I can't really see what, but

anything , except loosing one of us , would be worth it. And , you have used up everything ,EXCEPT , this. You have no

choice, Carlisle". Closing my eyes , " Yes dear, I realize that just before you knocked." Looking around at all those dear faces

of my wife and children, they all silently nod their heads. Agreeing with Alice and myself. I let out deep breath and reach for

the phone . Over-seas Operator , how may I help you? , Can you please connect me to Volterra , Italy please......

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Hmmm....ok, well I'll have more as soon as I can. Enjoy it? , hate it? or intrigued? let me know ;)