Mal closed the door to the shuttle, leaving just Jayne and River in the silence.

"Are you?" River asked, not looking up at the big man, standing so still in the middle of the floor.

"What?"

"Going to play nice?"

"Wanna know what's going on, River. What the hell were you playing at?" Barely contained anger was radiating off him like heat.

"You know."

"I know you're pregnant. And the kid's mine. Which I'm glad about."

"It would never be anyone else's."

"Then why'd you do this?" He couldn't move. Seeing her on that bed, knowing his off-spring was growing inside her, made his heart ache more than he could bear, and it came out in harsh words. "What made you think you could do this to me?" His hands were in fists.

"I don't know." She hunched over, pulling the covers up to her chin.

"Did ya … did ya want to kill it? Or get yourself killed?" She didn't answer, and he gritted his teeth. "Tell me."

She shook her head, then shrugged. "I wanted to feel normal."

"Ain't we agreed there's no such thing? Least, not for you." He glared at her. "Look at me," he ordered. "I wanna see your eyes."

She lifted her head slowly. "See if I'm lying?"

"No, I don't think you are. But maybe I can see what you ain't saying." It hurt. More than he could admit. Hurt that she hadn't come to him, hadn't said what the problem was, hadn't gorram trusted him to be there for her, to help her.

She could see it all, so clearly in his mind, the sharp edges she'd caused, the cuts, the bruises. The need to understand. "Trying to read me."

"Maybe." He stepped closer, slowly, haltingly, as if he was mired in quicksand. "Is it me?" he asked. "If'n this kid weren't mine, would it be easier for ya?"

"No!" she protested, reaching for his hand, holding it tightly.

He felt her pulse beating wildly, although maybe it was his, the way his heart was jackhammering in his chest. "Then what?"

"I don't want to kill you all."

"Kill us?"

"I might. In my sleep." Images of blood on snow white flowers, arterial spatter across conduits, eyes pleading for mercy before the life faded away … she pushed them down ruthlessly.

He didn't know what was in her mind, but the shudder that moved through her small frame was enough. "You think I'm gonna let you do that?"

"You couldn't stop me."

"I'd do my rutting best."

She shook her head, her hair swinging about her face. "It would be easier if I wasn't here."

"Who for?"

"Everyone!"

"That's fei hua." He looked into the dark wells of her eyes, trying to see into her soul, into the truth of things. "Was the Cap right? That why you went to Cerberus? You wanted to let them make that decision? Kill you? Or … or the baby?"

"If I don't have the baby or I leave Serenity –"

"River, don't." There was a begging, a pleading note in his voice that was quite foreign to Jayne. "Don't talk like that. Can't take it. It's my kid. I got rights –"

"It's my body."

His fist closed on her hand, hurting her, but she didn't pull away.

"Mine too," he ground out. "River, if you have to … if you need to leave, then we will. Together. But if you didn't let me come with you I … I don't know what I'd do. You'd tear out my heart."

She stared at him, the pain in his blue eyes he'd given up trying to hide, and looked into his soul. She saw the love, the devotion, the feelings she inspired in him, and she melted, launching herself at him, wrapping herself around him, letting her need for him dictate her actions.

His arms came up, one at her back, the other under her legs, lifting her to his chest. He held her, his cheek to hers, just revelling in the feeling of having her in his embrace for the first time in what felt like years.

"I feel torn, Jayne," she whispered into his body. "There's two of me now, and I … I sometimes can't cope with just one."

"That's what I'm here for, moonbrain. To help."

Something about the way he said it, called her his moonbrain, relaxed a knot deep in her belly. "Help me."

"Always." He breathed deeply of her scent, letting it fill him, and sat down carefully on the bed, holding her in his lap. He could feel the dampness of the tears she was shedding soak into his t-shirt, and lifted her face away. "Hey, no need to cry."

Tears still splashed onto his hand. "Lots of need. But mostly sad that I did this to you."

"'Pology accepted." He wiped them from her chin.

"I didn't think."

"Mind-readin' genius, huh?" He tightened his grip on her. "Don't see much of that genius part right now."

"My Jayne has more sense."

"Yeah. Figured that."

They sat for a long while, just holding each other, until she quieted, her body enervated.

He finally spoke. "So you're still crazy? Likely to go off and do this kinda thing again 'less I tie you to the bed?"

"When the wind is southerly I know a hawk from a handsaw."

"Ain't no wind in space, River."

"Then I'm as sane as you are."

"Don't say much."

She sniffed loudly. "I'm still crazy. You know I always will be. But now crazy and pregnant."

"Sure could be an interesting combination."

"Define interesting."

"Like you said, there's two of you now. And if this is just a taste, well, I'm gonna have to consider my options."

She looked up, her face tense. "Are you going to leave me?"

"Why'd I do that?"

"Because I'm not what you want anymore."

"Girl, if you weren't pregnant I'd put you over my knee, and Mal wouldn't be able to stop me. I wasn't talking about leavin' you. I was talking about locking you in the shuttle until you bring that little baby into the 'verse."

Her face softened. "Keep me safe."

"Yeah." He moved her hair away from her forehead. "I figure that's partly why it's been bad. You thought I didn't want kids, didn't you? What I said about Jesse."

"Crying." He had said it. More than a week ago. When Jesse was waking everyone in the middle of the night. That kids weren't worth it, the way they kept a man from sleeping.

"River, I didn't mean it. You know that. And I know kids cry. They all do. Ya shoulda heard Matty when he was small. Some nights I hadta go and sleep out on the porch. Got some looks from the neighbours, I'll tell ya. But he grew out of it. So'll Jesse. And it'd be our kid."

"But that's not … not the point."

"You really afraid you're gonna gut me?"

She placed the palm of her hand on the scar across his chest. "So easy."

"Yeah, guess it would be. But killing yourself or the baby ain't gonna solve anything. Just make everyone … River, I'd like as die if that happened." There was a lump in his throat that he tried to swallow back.

"I might not stay sane. Not all the time."

"Well, there's two of you in there right now." He touched her belly lightly with his large forefinger. "Two minds. It just pushed you a bit too far this time."

"I want this baby." As she said it, she realised she did, with all her heart.

"So do I." His blue eyes stared at her, willing her to believe him. "So do I, River." He sighed. "I figure maybe you ought to talk to Frey some more. She'd understand. Help."

"I won't run away again."

"Good." He tried to lighten the mood. "'Cause it'd probably give me a heart attack if you did. Then your brother would go all prissy on me and stick me with those big needles, and I'd hit him, and it'd be messy."

She giggled suddenly, and it was like a light turning on in the shuttle. "My Jayne's a marshmallow," she stated.

He harrumphed. "No, I ain't. And don't you go round telling anyone that I am. I just love you, is all."

Her heart beat faster. He said it so naturally. "I love you, too."

"So talk to Frey. She'll help."

"I know." She moved over a little so she could lean against him, her head on his shoulder. "That's what Mommas do."

"She ain't your Momma, girl."

"Yes she is. She sees herself like that."

"Does she?"

"Called me jaio nu."

"Well, you are beautiful."

"And she thinks of me as her daughter."

"More fool her." He smiled as she pinched him. They sat quietly for a while longer, their bodies getting used to each other once more. Then Jayne spoke again. "Moonbrain …" He looked down at her, nestled against his chest.

"Yes?"

"Why … why a unicorn? Frey said you were dreaming about a unicorn. That me?" he asked, feeling foolish.

"Don't feel like that," she said, her hand on his belly. "The unicorn is a creature of fable, fierce yet good, selfless yet solitary, and beautiful."

"That how you see me?"

"I must do."

"I ain't good, River."

"I think you are."

"And I ain't beautiful."

"You are."

"We gonna argue over this?" He pulled her closer. "I'm a mean, ornery bastard of a man, and I wouldn't want to pass that on to anyone, but with you there to temper me, to make something better … hell, River, I can't wait to meet this kid. But there's no way in hell you could say I was beautiful."

"You are to me." She stroked his skin through his t-shirt, feeling the musculature underneath, knowing the name of every rib and organ, yet just enjoying being next to him.

"Yeah, but you're crazy."

"So they say." She sighed in contentment. "Besides, I should have known my unicorn wasn't there to hurt me. A unicorn's horn is said to neutralise any poison."

"Poison?" He screwed his forehead up. "You saying you were poisoned? 'Cause if you are I'd better get your bro in here and he can –"

She laughed. "Not that kind of poison. Poison of the mind. My mind. Cracked as it is, it broke when I realised I was pregnant."

"Is it that bad?" he asked softly, almost afraid again.

"Not now. And I should have realised. You were there to cure me."

"River, I don't understand a damn word of what you're saying."

"It doesn't matter. You don't need to." She closed her eyes. "You're my Jayne."

For a long moment neither spoke, then the big man whispered, "So how long?"

"Mmn?"

"Until I see this get of mine?"

"Eight months, one day and … something like three hours and twenty eight minutes."

"Something like?"

"I'm guessing."

"Right." He laughed, a deep rumble that penetrated to her heart. "Just so long as I know."

---

Outside on the catwalk, Freya relaxed.

"They okay?" Mal asked, slipping his arm around her waist.

"They will be. It won't be easy, but I think they will be."

"Why not easy?"

She turned enough so that she could look at him. "River's right. She could get worse. It's bad enough being pregnant at the best of times. I mean, you know what hormones do."

"Surely seen the results," Mal agreed, remembering ducking more than once.

"Imagine that multiplied maybe a hundred times. More. Then add on top that you can still hear everyone else as well."

"So we take precautions."

"Mal, you're not locking her in the shuttle."

"Kinda solve all our problems, though, wouldn't it."

"And she'd be out of there in a moment. You know that. Unless you're considering asking Simon to dope her."

"Wouldn't do that. That's only for you." A sly grin spread across his face.

"And you're not to tell him about her pregnancy. That's up to River and Jayne."

"Oh, now, come on, Frey," Mal protested. "A man has to have something to look forward to in his life!"

"No. You're not to say a word." Then her lips twitched. "Although I'd dearly like to be listening in when they do."

Mal grinned wider. "Five'll get you ten he'll end up on his back, spark out in the infirmary."

"I'm not taking that kind of bet." She tried to look prim but it didn't work. "Unless you're considering taking a side on how long it takes him to come round."

He laughed. "I just wanna see his face when he realises who he's gonna be related to."

"Related?"

"You don't think I'm gonna let them get away with not getting hitched, do you?"

She pushed him in the chest. "No. You're not going to say a word about that."

"Frey –"

"Hank and Zoe aren't married yet."

"And I tell them every time I get the chance to make it legal."

"Mal, no. You know marriage isn't essential to a happy relationship."

He pulled her closer. "No. But it makes it feel amazing."

She smiled a little. "So you like being married to me?"

"Love it, ai ren."

"That's nice. But you're not going to change the subject." She poked him. "You just want to give her away."

"What if I do?"

"I think that'll be Simon's responsibility."

"He's not her father."

"Neither are you."

"You sure about that?"

"Mal, I know we don't know who River's biological father is, but I'm pretty sure it isn't you."

"In loco parentis."

"Does that mean you have to be crazy to have kids?"

"Something like that, only I was thinking more along the lines of you know how she looks on us."

"But that makes you a grandpa."

His eyes widened. "What?"

"If you're River's surrogate father, then you're her and Jayne's child's surrogate grandfather."

"Come again?"

"You heard the first time."

"And I still ain't taken it in." He shook his head. "Frey, darling', I ain't old enough to be a grandfather." He paused. "Although I guess I did start young so maybe out there could be –"

"Don't even think it," she warned.

"Hey, you started this!" He grinned. "Grandma."

"What?"

"If I'm surrogate grandpa, you're surrogate grandma." He laughed at the look on her face.

"Cao," she whispered.

"Exactly."

Freya pulled herself together. "But that little titbit of information doesn't get you out of promising not to badger them about getting married."

He sighed heavily. "Okay. I won't say anything. Yet. Least, not to Jayne."

"He's not going to be the problem, Mal."

"You think River won't want to marry him?"

"Mal, she's just found out she's pregnant, and look what that did to her. I don't think she can cope with a wedding as well."

"Yeah." He leaned forward and kissed her nose. "You're way too sensible for this crew."

"Me? Sensible?" She shook her head. "Wash your mouth out. And promise me you won't nag either of them."

"Okay. I promise." He smiled. "But you're going to have to do something in return."

"Oh?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Not that." He paused. "Well, not 'til later. I mean for River." He glanced towards the shuttle. "You're right. She's going to have problems, maybe all the way through until she gives birth. And right now I can only see two ways round this. Either I dump her on Lazarus with Inara for the duration –"

"You like living dangerously, do you?" Freya asked in astonishment. "Do you have any idea what Jayne would do to you if you suggested that?"

"OR …" he said firmly. "Or you take her in hand. Teach her some more of your control. And maybe at the same time you can give her your worldly wisdom on being pregnant."

Freya smiled. "You've been reading my mind."

"Must be catching," her husband said. "So you'll do it?"

"Wouldn't have it any other way."

"Good." He grinned. "Now, about the other stuff you're going to do in return …"