The train comes sweeping by through the station, and with it comes every bad feeling.
This isn't right, Alice says, turning in her tweed coat, turning to look back the way she came, back towards the city, towards her life.
Rain tightens her grip on her arm.
Leaves on a field, wasn't that all it was, really, just surface things, things that could be swept away at a moment's notice.
Good God, do I love you, Licker had said, turning and bowling over the lamp, her lamp, the one he had bought for her, so that it crashed against the carpet and was swept away in that ocean of fabric.
They'd sailed on a boat once. The air was brisk as anyting and there was seamist crawling over the waves. The Licker had laughed, the wind on his deformed skin and she had laughed with him.
Will you marry me? he had asked.
I can't get married, she'd said. I never want to get married.
There was that night she'd spent with Rain in a cottage in the middle of a lake. Alice had licked Rain's breast until the nipple was hard, and then bit it. Rain had laughed. Well, aren't you naughty?
Sex was important, wasn't it? The phone booth outside of the Denny's -- the snap of Alice's panties coming down to let Licker in, the way his tongue had slid down her shoulder, panting. Sex was the sign of a healthy relationship.
Black velvet, that's all their relationship was. Cheap kitsch. Neon paint on a tenous surface.
You said you loved me! Licker shouted, tearing the wallpaper down with his claws.
I've changed, she said.
Love can't change! It shouldn't be able to change! It should be strong and willful and powerful!
Alice shrugged. What could she do? What can she do? She was who she was. If she changed, she changed. Like the ocean, always rolling and shifting shape.
The floor of the train station bucks and rolls, but Rain takes her hand and she finds herself moored, steady, solid.
I want you, Rain's voice trickles into her ear. I want you for my Nemesis program.
Fuck, you're naughty, Alice sats, and laughs.