**WARNING! prolly the most morbid chapter of the whole story. Please have a strong stomach...just kiddin. But it is a glimpse of Jasper's demons and a day in the life of a vampire soldier, so you know it cannot be too pretty. Don't get scared off--thanks for reading!**

Ch. 2--The Battlefield That Bleeds

My fellow vampire recruits walked around the halls of the mansion that Maria had claimed. It was sort of like a college--for there were enough rooms. Like dorm rooms. I had my own room, of course, and the only visitor was my friend, Peter.

I often found myself caring for Peter more than Maria, a feat that many of my peers would not understand. So many of them felt lust for our leader, wishing they could be in my shoes and spend nights with her. They could take it--I didn't want it. I barely ever did. Only the first time was I remotely feeling accomplished--because I knew I was Maria's favorite.

I resisted the urge to slink onto the floor and hide from the passing vampires. With their long white limbs and unbeatable grace, they flounced up and down the halls sometimes just for entertainment. I myself had been to every nook and cranny of the halls.

"Jasper." I blinked rapidly, clearing away the haze that unexpectedly appeared over my vision. I could see Peter. His bright red eyes looked pitted with concern for me. His white hair fanned across his broad shoulders and sparkled in the lighting. He pressed his wise lips together as he took in my appearance. Surely I didn't look the best. I never did after nights with Maria. I knew he could tell why.

He put a hand on my shoulder. "Come with me, my friend." I did, wordlessly. We floated in the bare hall amongst a couple other vampires. As we made our way to the rooms, we passed Nettie's room.

Nettie was a lot like Maria in many ways. She used her power to gain advantage over the male vampires, and she would invite many different men into her quarters. The door was closed, and sunlight crept from beneath the door, so I could guess that her and her monthly lover were watching the sun sparkle over the hilltops together. In each other's arms, folded around huge white comforters.

I sighed, wishing Maria would at least pretend to love me. Nettie had once tried to lure me into her room, but I had refused in pure fear that it would make Maria jealous. I was partly afraid by my decision, too, that Nettie would become violent.

She simply let go of my shirt collar she'd been clutching and looked away. She had muttered for me to leave, and I did so. I left quietly and told no one of the encounter. The next day, she would have a new lover, so it wasn't terrible that I had been lost.

"Rough night?" Peter asked as we climbed the spiraling stairs. I nodded, pulling myself up with the iron rail. My friend fell silent, his hand still on my shoulder.

We trudged down a few more halls before turning into Peter's quarters. He shared the room with a newborn named Brennan. Brennan was quite an odd fellow, for his mood swings were extraordinary.

He lay on an old couch pulled from a human's dumpster area. His hands were behind his head, his bare feet in the air. His eyes were closed behind his longish ashy bangs. His bangs were long, but the rest of his hair was cropped rather short. It was an odd look for this era.

Brennan was also a massive, hulking vampire. I was glad he was on our side, was all I could say. He was a fairly new vampire, but he was quite sophisticated when his moodiness was not ignited. He had almost as many scars as I did--but from his own allies. He would egg them on until a battle ensued, and anything that he emerged with all his limbs still attached counted as a win to him.

"Brennan." I said, nodding to the still figure. His red eye peeked from an plum eye lid.

"Hey, Jazz." he sighed and continued in his stillness. Peter shrugged.

"So. Anything bothering you about last night?" He crossed his arms. He was a firm believer in talking about your problems, and when he first asked about a night with Maria, I was angered that he would be so interested in what we did. But when I tasted his emotion, I felt guilty for nearly turning away a helping hand.

I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed--it was broken and pieced out in a long way. "She commented about the scars again."

Peter was silent for a moment, and sighed. "The gall of that woman."

I let my arms fall in defeat. Brennan was a little more tense, bothered by my unhappiness. I tucked a hair behind my ear. "It doesn't matter."

"It does, Jazz." Brennan stood. "If anyone made a comment about my scars, I would knock their lights out." He made a loud smack with his fist and palm. I smiled weakly.

"Would it make you feel better, though? Would it make it go away?" I shrugged as I questioned Brennan. I turned from my comrades.

"We have a battle today, Jasper. You should go get ready. We head out in the afternoon. We'll probably be sitting around for several hours before the ambush." Peter said quietly. I nodded and made my way for the door.

"And don't let that little witch make you feel like crap, Jazzy." Brennan called after me. I smiled a little, but it was short lived.

--...--

"I heard this region was weak." Maria assured me. I wasn't so sure about that--she was radiating nervous waves. For her to be nervous definitely said something. I shifted my weight a little as he crouched behind a huge tree. I could feel the other's emotions--fear, power, assurance. Mostly fear. They were mostly good actors--they always wore a hard exterior, fearless. I swiped a hand across my face.

"We're gonna get 'em…" Maria said for nearly the hundredth time. I guess that was her way to cope with not knowing the future. That would really be something, to see the future.

"I think I can hear them." Maria hissed at me, and I perked my ear up. I strained to hear, and eventually, I did hear some stealthy feet approaching. Maria's ears were very pin point and useful in such situations.

Hopefully, the other allies heard this, also, because we couldn't risk whispering about it--we'd be more obvious than our enemies.

I could hear them very well now. They had to be approaching the clearing that we were circled around, our glowing red eyes watching intently. I peered from behind the tree trunk as the first vampire made its way into the view.

It was a small vampire, yes. A male with buzzed-off yellow hair. I could see a spatter of oddly contrasting freckles on his nose. I nearly gasped at how young he appeared. He had to be perhaps fifteen when he was changed…my heart felt punctured.

A couple other newborns slinked in after him, all of them walking in animalistic ways. Their hands were thrust away from their long torsos, like they knew we were there. Their emotions read fairly aware, but not frightened or threatened. They didn't know of us.

"Now!" Maria hissed into my ear, and before I acted, I saw the young male twirl at her voice. His eyes were wide and thirsty for a kill. I growled deeply and launched from my hiding place.

As I barreled through the moist night air, dozens of other long, lean bodies showered the sky. I charged for the closest vampire, purposely averting from the young one. I didn't plan to kill him. Someone less sentimental would.

However, I supposed I had cut too close to the young male. He lashed out and dug his steely nails into my side as I dashed by. I bit my tongue and groaned at the sharp pain. I had to turn and face him now, for he was charging at me, his newborn eyes blazing with no thought other than to kill.

He was mindless with his attacks. I dodged him easily and grabbed him around the ribs like a sack of potatoes. I flattened my palms against his smooth bones, and twisted. It was quick, but not exactly painless. I had severed his body in half.

He fell to the ground, shrieking. I backed away, shaking my head at the painfully young boy. He had been a boy--with a life ahead of him. He never got married, got to have kids...get a job…

I raised a hand to my lips, shaking. The body bucked a little before falling still. Its eyes fluttered close, and his freckles paled in the moonlight. My throat opened to a guttural gasp of despair for this fellow, and his hellish life. I supposed ending it was a favor done for him.

"Jasper!" I heard Peter cry from across the field. I knew the tone too well. I whisked around to be face to face with three large vampires.

I was rather fast with dodging, so I was doing well for a long string of failed attacks. It was when another jumped into the mix that I was harmed. Maria seriously underestimated their size, unless she did know, but was testing her pride with her army instead. We were in way over our heads, and I didn't have the luxury of hoping for an ally to swoop in and relieve me, for many were probably in the same situation. Others wouldn't fare as well as me, and even I was getting dug into the side by an enemy.

Jaws clamped around my side, scraping against the bone. I was at least thankful that the gargantuan teeth didn't mash up my ribs. Aside from that, I was screaming in unbearable pain.

It was so unreal--the pain was taunt and unrelenting and scalding. The venom pulsed through my struggling body, and as I writhed to get away, another set of jaws crunched over my around my arm. My limb was thrown to the ground, pinned there. I arched my back and screamed even louder, in more pain and for help. Would it come? I had never been pinned with so much fear in my body before. This could be my end…

My scream was cut short when yet another row of fangs burrowed into my collar. The pain was so jarring and dizzying that I couldn't even unlatch my mouth to whimper. I lay there, my eyes wide and pasted on my killer. His shoulders hunched, and a sickening grin crossed through his lips, already peeled around my burning flesh.

My jaw dropped open, gasping for the familiar drink of air, but I found I could not. My throat was constricted as my collar filled up with venom, pure and excruciating venom. I could feel it burn though my hollow veins, racing up and down my arms, making the hot sensation spread.

This was it. I was going to be severed and burned in my enemy's fire…

The world around me was losing its vividness, it was becoming pale blues and harsh blacks. Darkness flooded the edges of my vision, crawling until it sheathed my pupils. I was alone in the darkness, unaware of the pain. It felt like I was being held by firm hands, not highly muscled jaws of steel.

I didn't feel their teeth dislodge painfully, but they had to have, because the firmness disappeared. Their teeth slipped out smoothly, my body already numbed. Isn't it ironic how pain becomes the ultimate Novocain?

"Jasper?" It was a female's voice, far away. It was so smooth and beautiful, but I still wanted to curse it for bringing me from my endless sleep. I could imagine her hand reveling towards me, to reach out and touch my mangled body. I imagined a flow of warm comfort, but when she contacted my skin, I only felt extreme pain, jarring me from my slumber.

As painful as it was, it was a natural instinct to heave up my chest, arching my back as I screamed. I still saw nothing but darkness when my eyes popped open. They drifted close in weariness, but shapes began to form then. I struggled to keep above the sleeping surface. I was there to do a job, not to sleep and be managed for like a child. But the pain was so terrible…I couldn't move.

I found I could pick out Maria's hovering face. I wanted to reach out an touch her beautiful hair, just to know it was real. That I was not dying, much as I wanted to die. How strange my mind was working…

"Here, here. Hold it. I'll get his head." Came her voice, fuzzy like a voice on a crackling radio. I moaned, trying to say her name.

Something warm touched my lips, and I realized it was blood. I immediately let Maria help me with my head, much as it pained my collar. I suckled on the opening that the blood flowed from with greed, feeling helplessly pathetic teh whole time. Gulp after gulp the body drained, though I didn't bother to open my eyes and stare at the corpse's face. I didn't want the blazing reminder of my monstrosity.

"There, there." Maria cooed, and I couldn't help but feel blissful for it. She was caring for me, me and me alone. I wanted to touch her face as badly as I wanted more blood. I opened my mouth, letting the dryness of my throat whistle in request. She didn't give me any more blood.

I felt her hand touch my forehead, then, and it was unlike any touch I had felt from her. It was radiating care and worry. I was elated to have her feel this way, and I melted at her touch. Her fingers stroked my hair, matted with blood. I attempted to swallow, but stopped in mid move at the sharp pain in the base of my neck.

"We'll get you better, Jasper. Just lie there for a while." Maria whispered into my ear. The intimacy of the gesture caused my broken heart to flutter. I wanted desperately to ask what had happened in battle then.

I rasped, trying to speak, but her finger grazed my lips, telling me to stop. I obeyed. I always did.

I think she knew what was on my mind, however. "There were many newborns, Jasper, but they were all stupid. Their attack techniques were predictable. I knew you would have fared better if not paired with several at once. I'm sorry."

I tried to shake my head, tell her it was okay. I forgave her. I wanted her touch again…

It was odd to want it now, of all times. I knew she was not normally gentle, yet I wanted to hold her and be held. I wanted…to love her? Yes, that was right. I knew she was capable of care, so I decided I did love her. She could love me back.

YES it is very depressing, and just a reminder...i hope u can tolerate angst! well, thanks for reading up to chapter 2!