A/N: This is not Nejiten, sort of coming of age thing. Don't like, don't read; though do give it a chance. Also, sort of AU, takes place in modern Tokyo (sort of).

1,245 words

Characters: Tenten, Naruto

Summary: "I can remember jumping from one relationship to another, from very silly ones of an indescribable childhood to premature andanzas of an early puberty. He came along soon after, in a flash that felt a daze. And so, one could say, we grew up."

Chapter 5:

Flashback

I can remember jumping from one relationship to another, from very silly ones of an indescribable childhood to premature andanzas of an early puberty. Childhood crushes, flashing boyfriends and superficial relationships.

I still remember my cherish to hold a hand, merge in an embrace, yearn for the flesh…the warmth of a body, of a kiss or a caress. For that feeling of loneliness to disappear and for the first time in my life feel like if I was actually wanted.

Now I realize I had been selfish and blind, incredibly stupid to believe, it all was true.

And I remember running away from Zaku on those same reasons. I had nothing more to give; how can you hold heart with the same hands that refuse to give yours? Cheating, mimicking love in order to hide your own loneliness was not fair (at least that's what she told herself, because she was being selfish, needed a reason to leave that emotionally unsettling relationship and truth fell like the final piece of a puzzle you had thought you'd lost but had always been hiding under the sofa).

Naruto came along soon after, in a flash that felt a daze. I'd been an addict, loneliness was far too scary to face and Naruto…he just wanted to be loved. Soft caresses and wet kisses had to be forgotten.

Almost as soon as it started it ended with a turbulent stop. We were young, and I found out much to my surprise that despite everything, I was inexperienced. We had been so close, it terrified me…real love was scary unlike the pre-fabricated relationships I had fooled myself to believe in.



Our relationship was quick. Between everything that was going on; I yearned for something genuine and real, for my sole existence was a compilation of structured lies and well crafted phonies. He wanted acceptance and recognition. Both of us looked for company. I did not mind his nor did he mind mine. He walked me to school and picked me up, we strolled down the park every night from work, he bought me flowers and I cooked him chocolate. He slept at my place, I never at his.

"We can do this Naruto," I muttered beside him, my voice trembled with unrecognized fear.

"Yes, Tenten-chan," his voice was still and graver than it should have sounded. He was the chirpier of the two, even though both of us were self-proclaimed optimists.

"Here grab my hand," I ordered with unease. It was strange, even when we considered ourselves a couple it was rare for us to display physical affection. My heart gave a painful throb when his sweaty palm intertwined with mine.

"What now?" he asked quietly beside me, his voice soft as the one of a child asking his mother for guidance. I bit my lip, finding his unusual quietness unnerving.

"We face each other," I said without falter, self-conscious of the way my hand was trembling against his palm. For the first time in years, not quite sure of what I exactly feared.

He gave a reassuring squeeze as our eyes met. His were beautiful cerulean while mine were a plain shade of brown. I could see the speckles of sweat trailing down his forehead, his eyes shouting at me for assistance. I was pretty much aware that I was Naruto's fist girlfriend, while my life was tarnished with more wrong-doings that I would've liked to accept. This wasn't my first but for some reason I did not wanted to acknowledge, it certainly felt like it.

"Now?" he insisted quietly, his voice sounding more like the croak of a frog. I heaved a breath, Naruto's own warm breathing tickling my sensitive skin.

"We kiss," I say barely over a whisper, the words slowly leaving my lips. Naruto's bright eyes exclaimed panic and confusion before my eyelids closed gently against my will. My lips puckered unwillingly, the heat of the moment rising to my face.

I felt his lips linger above mine, heard him moist them with his tongue and then descend. They crushed against mine uncertainly until I countered. It started roughly, his inexpertness had being quite evident against mine. I led him, induced in his scent and when one of us bit the other's tongue, I wasn't sure who, we darted apart.

We panted and purposely avoided each others eyes. I had tried, I knew I had. He had tried, of that I was sure. But all I felt was a cascade of feelings I did not want to recognize. Failure wasn't something I was keen to accept easily. Cold washed rapidly through my body, every inch of my skin dreading any further approach.

"It's not your fault," after a minute, I am the first to speak for his eyes were downcast, and I had an unspoken fear for tears.

"It wasn't good, right?" he asked almost clumsily and dejected. His body language making quite clear he did not want me near either.

"No, It was okay….we are just… not meant to be," I reply quietly trying to hide the trembling of my voice. My lips barely touched each other, trying to avoid more imminent bruising.

He didn't respond, nor did he turn back to me. One of his fingers trailing down a circle in the floor, my stomach gave me a somersaulting jolt.

"It felt as if I were kissing my brother," my lips blurted painfully against the moist air that surrounded us. His face turned to me confused, for some reason the thought that I had failed him lingered in my brain.

"But Tenten-chan, you don't have a brother," he spoke softly. I fought back tears as his eyes reminded me of a small vulnerable child. I had lived in an orphanage until I was twelve, there were kids I had considered my brothers and sisters but Naruto, he had been remotely alone all his life.

"I know," the words spluttered with difficulty, a rough knot damaged my throat. The warmth returned slowly to my body. If I was crying I did not notice.

"I felt as if I were kissing my brother too," Naruto spoke in slight bewilderment, as he gave me small playful smile.

My eyes warmed again as I shook my head feebly. He really was a life saver…

"What is that supposed to mean? Are you calling me manly?" my voice reasoned with fake animosity.

"Of course not Tenten-chan! I meant sister I swear! You know I love you, you're the most beautiful girl I know!" he expressed with glee, that boyish smile of his overcoming his kind features.

And I hugged him, while a short river of tears trailed down my face into his shirt. Our relationship ended there. We still walked to school together until we had to part, he picked me up but there were no more chocolates or flowers, and he stopped coming over.

After a while, we drifted apart, Naruto said he'd met the most beautiful girl in the world, she went to another school but that he liked watching her every time she passed his school on her way home. I concentrated on my studies and indulged in my own world. One could say, we grew up.



Loneliness closed in again, and I embraced it this time. Brave is the one who faces her fears not the one locking them. And so, the slow required healing started.

Then He came along and so, the story starts.

A/N: Yes, you read right, this was a Naruten (sort of ). If you're observant enough you'd have noticed some things: 1) I experimented (again) this time writing in 1st POV (I hope to receive feedback on the outcome) 2) This was not Nejiten (my OTP) but Naruten something that I do have a soft spot for but don't read often (or at all). 3) I was very specifically strong on descriptions; something that used to be my weakness is now not so much of a weakness. LOL

Personally, I love this one, I don't really know why, maybe it has something to do with the fact that it's in 1ST POV and it gives more of a personal feeling, honestly I dunno. Originally this was meant to be part of a High school fic I was writing but I've abandoned, and so I changed it in order to make it work as a one-shot. I hope the goal was accomplished.

Also, this doesn't mean I stop writing Nejiten, I only wanted to experiment and to give other pairings some love. And yes, if you're wondering that 'He that came along' is Neji, just for the kicks. You can guess who the girl Naruto fell for is. I wanted to upload this when I had either 850 views or 20 reviews but it didn't happened and it was about time that I updated

I hope you continue the reading. Constructive criticism is always welcomed, just as positive feedback or if you just happen to have an opinion or whatever, don't hesitate to leave a review.

Half-note

/PS: (edit) Would you guys like it if I post some sort of pilots for my future multi-chaptered fic here? So you can give me your opinion about it (even if they don't restrictively work as a one-shot), I really want to be serious about it so that's why I'm suggesting it. /