Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto or Kakashi. Hubby says only one man of this house and since he's worth keeping.....well, you get the picture.
Kakashi: You mean you're just gonna let me die like Kishimoto did? But I'm Kakashi, the Copy-nin, Man of a thousand jutsu. I can't just die.
Rose: (hands Kakashi a box of tissues while muttering) That's what you get for reading porn in front of kids.
NAruto: Whoa. Kashi-koibito. Why are you crying?
Rose: he's being a baby
Kakashi: Rose is going to just let me die and since we're bonded now that means you'll die too.
Rose: I didn't kill you off, Kakashi. Kishimoto did. Hubby just says I can't own you.
Kakashi: Oh that's different then. Keep typing. You're slacking off there.
Rose:( muttering while typing about slavedrivers and cry babies)
Chapter Nineteen: Counter-Plot
"I still think the only way to get her to back off is to tell our Fathers of the devices we found and demand they find out who placed them, why and what they did or were planning to do with any hard copies they took from those devices. Our Fathers are highly enough placed that if we tell them we do not feel safe in our own homes or bathrooms they will be able to do something to curtail her," said Hinata. The group had been batting ideas back and forth for three hours now and Hinata's suggestion was the least offensive but most likely the most effective as well.
"It is true that I sent my bugs around my room last night before I disrobed for bed," said Shino. "My clan values privacy and those were a definite invasion of Naruto's. There was no logical reason to assume that they would not invade our privacy just as easily as they did his. It is a well-known fact that Naruto is always under observation of one degree or another because he is the container of the Kyuubi but this went over the top. And if they would go so far as to spy on him from inside the toilet bowl, they can and will spy on us as well should they ever decide we are as important a personage as he. And yes, Naruto. They do think you are important to the village. They do not spy just to make sure you do not release the Kyuubi. They spy to make sure no one gets close enough to take you away from the village against your will. For that reason, you will always be watched whether you approve or not."
Naruto nodded. "I know but you have to admit, no one with enough power to force me away from the village was going to get me by coming through the toilet bowl, Shino. The handle to flush them right back where they came from is just too handy for me in that position." Everyone chuckled as they mentally saw Naruto flushing Itachi down his toilet drain. "Or through the middle of my bed. Those infrared cameras on my bed weren't going to show them a kidnapper any more clearly that the ones on, or in, the headboard and footboard did. In fact, the kidnapper would be less identifiable in the infrared lens than from the other cameras."
Shino nodded. "And that is why I agree with Hinata. We should inform our Father's of not only how many spy devices we found but also where we found them. It is beyond disgusting that they would spy to that degree on anyone but that they would think they had every right to do so only makes it more disgusting. And that they would do so to someone I know Father considers the village's greatest Hero of all time takes this outside the realm of my logic. I believe that when we do inform our Fathers we should make it very clear there will be consequences should it ever occur to that degree again."
"But what kind of consequences can we hold up as examples should they challenge that, Shino," asked Kiba. "Kaasan will, you know. She challenges everyone she feels threatens her position and that would qualify."
"You'll have to think of something if you can't just leave it hanging with a try it and see type answer," said Shikamaru.
"I already told my Dad," said Chouji. "He was honestly surprised and definitely not happy about it. I heard him slamming pans in the kitchen both last night and this morning which I know he only does when he is angry. Very angry. Even Mom stays out of the kitchen when he begins slamming pans around no matter how long it's been since she had food to eat. We do not go in the kitchen then."
Kiba said, "I think we should get them all together somewhere and Naruto, you and Kakashi need to be present when we tell them. Chouji has already started the rumble and chances are, his Dad will give the others a heads up but still we need them to know you two have limits that you will fight to defend. They let this get out of hand and if we have to mark your territory for them to relearn their limits then so be it."
"If they can get out of it, by pretending that you don't know how far it went, they will assuage their guilt with that knowledge. If they can go a step further, and say you didn't mind being spied on like a lab specimen, they will not do anything to prevent a repeat performance and the upload of more candid x rated shots. And I know for a fact that our beloved Hokage is perverted enough to sell a few of the more torrid images she gets her hands on to clear some of her enormous gambling debt. If someone she owes enough money to will agree to erase her debt to them for a single shot of you in a provocative pose or better the two of you together in bed, she will hand it over," said Anko.
At their grimaces she laughed as Asuma quipped, "Face it. You two are both Hot Property on your own merits but together. . . ? You sizzle. She will get rich off the fact that the two hottest guys in the world right now are both Leaf nin. And involved with each other. She's sitting on a goldmine and she is savvy enough to know it." They groaned while everyone else smirked.
"I agree with Anko and Asuma. Even if it's found out, she'll just claim ignorance of how they got it but she's still just as big of a pervert as her teammate. And I'd say from the fact that you know she plans to blackmail you, she does have pictures of things you'd rather not have publicized," Kurenai said with a question in her voice.
Kakashi nodded. "We figure she's got shots from the inn. We just don't know where they are or of exactly what they are."
Anko grinned. "Just think of the one thing or position you definitely would not want anyone else seeing and that will be what she has in black and white. Take it as a given she knows exactly what you did and did not do in that room."
Immediately an image of him sucking Naruto while Naruto finger fucked Kakashi came into both their minds and they groaned at the same time, sharing a look. Not only was Kakashi unmasked at the time, Naruto hadn't even been awake when that round had begun. It was definitely high on Kakashi's list of private business never to be revealed. And because Naruto knew how Kakashi felt about being seen without his mask as well as anyone even suspecting he could be the Uke in the relationship it was also high on his list. That was also the only sound recording they were actually worried about since Kakashi had made it very clear what he wanted from Naruto at the time and had done nothing to moderate his voice. "Well, now we know. We have to get that picture and any others she has," growled Naruto. "As well as any audio she might have."
"Audio?" asked Tenten confused. "Why would she have audio?"
A beat red Iruka said, "Because people in the throes of passion are not usually quiet, Tenten. An audio recording would go a long way to back up the action displayed on any picture she has since pictures can be doctored but audio that supports it is harder to mess with."
An embarrassed Kakashi just nodded, his mind busy replaying that joining in all it's glorious detail for him. For him that was the best event of all their long night of pleasure. Remembrance of how he had turned around, unable to take it any more, and impaled himself on Naruto's dick caused him to flush a fiery red that was visible over the edges of his mask and visible to everyone in the room. As he began to pant slightly, he could clearly remember demanding that Naruto do him as hard as he could and in a tone that clearly said he knew exactly what he was asking for as well as why. He barely bit back a whimper of grief as he carded his hand through Naruto's soft locks trying to calm his panic. If she had a recording of that there would be no denying he had acted for his own interest at that time. He definitely didn't want any of that out there in a strangers hands. The possibility of blackmail should she actually use it to pay off her debts was just too very likely.
Gulping, he turned a panicked eye on his fellow jounins. That fact alone told the other jounin just how bad the blackmail had to be. His voice was shaky as he fought for control. "Naruto is right. We have to get a hold of every single thing she has. If even one piece of it falls into the wrong hands, we could both be easily forced into acting against the village. Neither of us wants that."
"That raunchy huh?" asked a smirking Anko.
"Let's just say he had too much drug and leave it at that," said Kakashi, his fingers once again tangled in Naruto's soft blonde locks. Though, to the rookies he seemed calm and composed, though still slightly pink, Naruto and the jounin knew he was not. He was highly embarrassed and more than a little bit worried. Kakashi also knew that to the gay community, it would look like Naruto, who was clearly the younger of the pair, was indeed the seme considering Kakashi had brought him to climaxing repeatedly while only burying himself in Naruto once throughout that long night. Both of them knew it wasn't quite the truth but hard flat pictures did not always tell the truth. Knowing Tsunade, the images she would show them would only be the ones she calculated had the best chance of forcing Kakashi into making Naruto do as she wished. They both knew that would only be the evidence that showed him being subservient to Naruto but not necessarily to just relieve the blond's suffering. And they both knew there was no way in hell she would ever admit the only reason he had been suffering at all was because she had drugged his food or arranged for the drugging to happen.
Shikamaru spoke up. He had been sitting with his head in his hands letting the conversation roll on over his head as he thought things through. "Naruto, the evidence aside for the moment since we all knew it would have to be bad for her to be able to blackmail you with it, how long can you hold that transformation and under what circumstances will it break? All her manipulations come to naught if you can not hold it when you are sleeping for instance. If a single punch will break it she would have to be willing to put you on inactive duty from the minute she decides you should be a breeder pig. If you run out of chakra and it vanishes she has an even bigger problem. We all know henges need a steady supply of chakra to be maintained so therefore in order for her to be able to force you to use it to bring children into the world she has to have already answered those questions. I don't believe she got those answers from you since you have only used that henge for brief periods of time and never while sleeping or fighting. Did she put you through any kind of stamina testing while using it that you remember?"
Everyone in the room just looked at him. The simplicity of their answer had never occurred to any of them.
Naruto shook his head. "No, she hasn't but as for the chakra usage you know that isn't an issue with me unless I'm fighting Akatsuki or Sound higher-ups. And my transformation doesn't really require me to even think about it. I've never tried to hold it for very long though so who knows what kind of problems might arise." He got a very devious grin on his face as he thought of all the grief he could give her if she refused to come to her senses.
"However, it does not change the fact that we do need to get her blackmail evidence away from her," Shikamaru told them all. "She could very well ruin both of them with it and do irreparable harm to the village because of it. What is more, due to the sheer volume of devices we found, I am equally sure she is not the only person who has pictures, or recordings, they should not have even if they do only show Naruto. Should even one of them show evidence of activity neither Kakashi or Naruto wants known occurred or can be manipulated by an enemy and made to look as if he was with said enemy intimately, the Leaf could suffer greatly. Regardless though, those images, or recordings they might have, could be ones that could only be used against Naruto. But I am betting that what effects him, will also affect Kakashi now since you have admitted you are bonded. What if Danzo, who we know full well will do anything he can to force your death holds one of those recordings or images that makes it seem as if you are somehow perverse or doing something you are not doing? He could very well try to blackmail you into leaving the village without orders and then send hunter nins to kill you claiming you are a missing nin and too powerful not to be hunted down and killed. If I understand bonded pairings correctly, that would also lead to Kakashi's death."
"Hai. That it would but also if he were to try and force me out he would also be forcing Kashi out with me since the bond would compel him to follow me," said Naruto. "So long as we do missions either close by the village or together it is not a problem but being apart now. . ." he broke off, paling and gaining a bleak look to his blue eyes.
Shikamaru took note of it and saw the answering echo in Kakashi's eye and grunted. "Thought as much. Ok so we will work on getting in and finding her blackmail evidence and destroying it. No one is to look at any evidence they find as these are our friends and comrades and we would not want them to look at something that could be used against us should the shoe be on the other foot. And I for one will not claim I would not have acted as they did under the same or similar circumstances, cameras on me or not. We will show them the same respect and courtesy we would want them to show us. Agreed?"
"Ah man," grumbled Anko, as she nodded her head in agreement. Everyone else grinned at Anko's disappointment but agreed also. Truthfully Anko respected both Naruto and Kakashi to ever look longer than she had to at anything the pair didn't want her to see. Naruto had gone through the same shit she went through only his torment was much worse since it had begun when he was born. She at least had been old enough to understand why she was being treated like dirt. And Kakashi had gained her respect due to his own suffering as well as his impressive mission history. To her, they were both beyond reproach and she did not wish to see them brought low over something so simple as biology.
"Now then. While we are breaking into the tower and the Hokage's palace to find this evidence, Iruka-Sensei, I would like for you to arrange a get together of our council member parents, Koharu and Homura. Koharu and Homura had a big hand in raising Naruto and I think both will be extremely upset about this." He pointed to the bag of spy devices resting so innocently on the coffee table.
Iruka nodded asking, "Does that mean I will not be part of the evidence finding group?" Truthfully he didn't want to be part of that because he knew he didn't want to see or hear that evidence but the party that went after it would not be able to avoid seeing and hearing it since they had to make sure what they were grabbing was the right evidence.
"No. I figured that would be too hard for you since you view Naruto as family and whatever she has, as Anko put it, has to be pretty raunchy. Now while we are working to free you, Naruto, you will test the limits of that henge and stay out of sight for as long as possible. I know we won't get long before someone gets suspicious but we may get a week or two. And we need to know that you can both handle Naruto as a female for long stretches of time without a break. Kakashi, you will need to be seen out and about and you will need to make sure you continue the game you and Naruto were playing before that last mission. We need to do everything we can to throw off suspicion that you are already living together. Kiba, a last question for your nose."
Kiba looked interested and he asked, "Does a females scent change immediately when she gets pregnant?"
"It's pretty quick, yeah because there is also the scent of the child mingling with her own but it's not immediate. The smell of the man and woman is too over powering at first for that small scent to be picked up. But I can usually tell before a medic can. Sometimes it's as quick as just after she takes a shower to clean up though most times it takes a day or two."
"Good. Then I want you to work on sharpening it just in case we have to use it to prevent Naruto being forced into bringing a child into the village. His having a child over this is, in my eyes, one of the worst things that can happen now. I can easily see Danzo threatening the child's safety as a way of gaining control over both it's parents and if I can see that so will he. Therefore, we will rely on you to tell Naruto the minute you know he's pregnant so he can transform to abort it before anyone else finds out and that is assuming Tsunade checked on the fertility of the girl forms ovaries when she checked the henge."
"That I know she did," said Naruto. "She was cackling like a crazy lady about it."
"Hmm. Just can't help being troublesome can you? That probably means you are very fertile as a female." Shikamaru shook his head. To Kiba he added, "You should probably arrange a trip by here every couple of days so you can check him then."
Kiba nodded understanding exactly how important the job was he was being asked to perform. "For my friends I could and will do no less than my best," he said sounding more like Lee than he did himself.
"Do not forget because if he should be forced into birthing children, Danzo will have control over them for the rest of their lives which won't be very long at all. Their deaths, should he get their child, would give him total control over said child. And they have already told us exactly why their child should never end up under Danzo's control. His people are everywhere and they are more than capable of making that child disappear any time he wishes it to. That is simple truth, people. We are not just up against our meddling Hokage. We are fighting our council member and his private army as well and they will do anything to gain power and control. Naruto, you and Kakashi must make sure that if she does try to blackmail you before we can find this evidence and destroy it that you make it very clear to her exactly what is at stake as well as the fact that she will have to go without both of your services as ninja while trying for said child."
Everyone nodded their understanding as Naruto sat up and said, "Naruto clone has just finished his meeting with Sakura who he reports is now looking for Ino. She's gloating and looking very pleased with herself and I don't think it ia all because I was groveling for her advice on how to set things right with you. She does want to gossip about me but also she wants to rib you for what I said yesterday." Ino grimaced and rolled her eyes.
"She's getting tiresome to deal with more often than not lately."
"Ok. Time to break this up then. She'll get suspicious if she doesn't see some of us around anywhere as she is looking for Ino. She may be dense sometimes but she is smart and it won't take long for her to figure out we were all together without her. Then she'll pester each of you to know why she was excluded. She'll make some references to the fact that Naruto wasn't invited either but that will only be to find out what you're planning against him due to the betting pool since she will assume it is Ino's revelation of the pool to all of you that you would wish to meet without him," said Kakashi.
Again everyone was in agreement and they left trickling out of the house in small groups agreeing to meet up elsewhere and for Shikamaru to be their co-ordinator for the planned actions. They left the bag of recording equipment with Naruto and Kakashi since it was safest there until it was needed for the confrontation with the council.
Author Notes: I'm not asleep yet. Yay! Anyway here ya go. The next chappie starts off with a lemon to reward you all for being so patient with the talking chapters. Oh and let me know in your reviews if you like the chapter opening dialogue or not. I can keep posting it or quit and just do the disclaimer if you prefer. Don't forget the reviews telling me what you think and if I drop any red threads of thought (like I did with who all was planting bugs in Naruto's apartment. That was a good review or two that pointed that out to me. Thank you.)