Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't own. Not yesterday. Not today. Not tomorrow either.
Kakashi: Uh-oh. She's. . .not happy. . .I wonder. . .
Rose: (glares). . .What are you talking about?
Kakashi: Gulps. Quit glaring at me. I didn't even bring out my books lately.
Rose: I know. And if you want me not to glare at you then DON'T drink the last cup of my COFFEE and leave me the EMPTY POT! (Black hair starts bushing out as fire enters green eyes and red suffuses Rose's face)
Kakashi: Kuso. I'll go make more. You guys and gals. Save Rose's house while I get her caffeine fix going. Review please for my safety and sanity. (mutters) Scary woman. . .doing that with no chakra. . . what the 'ell?
Rose: COFFEE Kakashi. NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW Morning + Empty Coffee Pot = Dead Copy-Nin.
Kakashi:(gulps and vanishes in a swirl of leaves) Hai, Ma'am Savvvvveee meeeeeeeeeee
Chapter Twenty-Four: Eye Opening Proof?
A week went by before anyone found any evidence of who had been responsible for some of the bugging attempts on Naruto. One of Danzo's newest operatives was caught with a picture there was absolutely no other way he could have gotten except from one of the infrared cameras. The picture had been doctored to make it clear that it was Naruto in the bed and a hazy outline was added to let the viewer determine who was in the bed with him. Most people assumed it was Kakashi, if they were a ninja, or the Kyuubi, if they were a civilian.
There was another attack on Naruto later that night and this time council members showed up along with their offspring to see for themselves what Naruto was forced to deal with from their people. They watched as the Rookies waded into the mob, literally throwing people around like rag dolls until they got to where Naruto stood against an alley wall. He had a broken hand, black eye, swollen lip and numerous cuts and bruises. He was also favoring one foot over the other, doing his best to keep his weight off the injured foot as much as he could while he avoided every punch a drunk sloppily threw at him.
Hiashi called out, "Hinata, knock that fool out. Neji, cover her." The two Hyuuga moved into action. In seconds, the fight was over and the mob was attempting to flee. But the adults weren't letting them go this time. One by one every member of the mob found themselves kissing a very dirty alleyway ground. All of them were drunk. Very drunk.
That led to an angry Ibiki being awoken to deal with them as Hiashi coldly informed him he was to work out exactly what they thought they were doing beating up one of the people kept them safe just so they had the ability to go drink themselves stupid.
The second thing that happened was every bar in the village received an order to limit each customer to three drinks total unless they could prove they were a ninja. Every bar owner and bartender was informed it was not a three drink per establishment limit. It was a three drink per day limit that would be strictly enforced. And by months end every bar in the village had a device installed on the door to let the bartender know when a customer had already had his three daily allotted drinks. Many of them still served the drunks but the law was altered to allow the council to punish the civilians, who broke it by knowingly seeking out more than the three daily allowed drinks, and the bartenders and owners, who knowingly served them after that point.
The law gave an owner three warnings before they were expelled from the village. Each time a citizen was arrested in their bar, the serving people were arrested also and the owner was required to pay a fee to get his or her employees back. The fee grew with the number of times the establishment broke the rules but it wasn't until a bar had to close it's door because the owner was expelled from the village that people got the idea. The council was serious. No more than three drinks per day unless the customer was a ninja.
The citizens were also given more than one chance to change their ways. But for those citizens who still wanted to drink more than the established three drink per day limit, after the third warning they were sent into work farms away from the general populace where they could spend all their time providing food or herbs to the honest law abiding people of the village. They were split into two groups since some could be salvaged while the others could not. Those whom the council felt could be made healthy again, were sobered up slowly while those who were beyond hope were given all the booze they could drink and marked with a seal to prevent them ever leaving the premises of the work farm they were assigned to. It didn't matter to the council who they had in the village on their side or relying on them. The drunks had let those people down by choosing to spend their pay in the bars and if they were willing to hurt Naruto and Lee then it was likely they were hurting those who loved them also. A bully in an alley is not likely to be a loving supporter behind the closed doors of their own home either.
The council treated the drinking law just as seriously as they did the laws governing the mental, physical and emotional well-being of the village. Since getting drunk led the people to harming their ninja and fellows when they might otherwise have simply gone home and slept off whatever was putting them in a fighting mood, the councillors saw no need to play around and make excuses for the people. Besides, visitors to the village got a better image to take home without the chance of running across a mob beating in an alley on their way back to their hotel room and that meant the reputation of the Leaf grew as a place where people could be happy while living their lives freely in the manner they chose. So long as it was law-abiding, of course.
The council also met often to discuss the best ways of getting Tsunade out of the mess she had created because she wanted something for the village they did not have at the present time. They knew she really did think she was acting in Naruto's best interest as well as in Kakashi's. To her way of thinking, all couples needed to be together in order to be happy and since Naruto had the ability to give Kakashi an heir she just couldn't see how it was wrong to wish him to do so. Nor could she believe Kakashi didn't want an heir. Every man wanted a son to leave his life's work to. The councillors all knew Tsunade was too used to manipulating Naruto to ever think she was doing him a disservice in this plot.
Hiashi told the council when they met at the bar-b-que restaurant for another impromptu meeting, "We have to get this issue settled soon. I have to run a poison detection jutsu on everything I eat or drink in my home because of all this crap."
Inoichi had nodded in agreement. "Ino burned my Icha collection and locked the door to my little room. She won't give me the key either." He pouted.
Chouza nodded and said mournfully, "Chouji told his Kaasan and she barred me from the kitchens. I am being rationed on my food as well." Disbelieving looks went around the table.
Shikato sighed and said, "I think Yoshino's frying pan was the lightest punishment any of us have gotten from this." He rubbed a painful looking bump on his head with one hand while the other traced lightly over a bruise on his shoulder. He was also sitting very gingerly on the chair and not allowing his back to touch the chair backrest at all. Clearly Yoshino had used that frying pan to such an effect there wasn't any possibility of a make-up session afterwards.
Koharu sighed as did Homura. "For us, it's been pranks pulled by our grandchildren though they don't know why the Rookies have asked them to prank us. Moegi and Udon are best friends with Konohamaru who sees Naruto-kun as his mentor. He takes everything Naruto tells or shows him to heart," said Koharu.
"And improves on it," added Homura mournfully. "Who'd have thought our children were so good at punishing us when we break their rules."
"Who would have thought they did have rules for our conduct?" asked Tsume. "Kiba actually told Hana I dishonored the clan though he didn't say how. Hana took away my favorite dog treats. She won't give them back until I fix things. And she sits in on clan meetings to make sure I don't put a foot wrong again." Needless to say not much was accomplished at the meeting of the Elders as they all commiserated with each other over the level of punishment their young people were dishing out to them.
The medical corp was delighted with the new laws the council put into effect for the village. One of the things they hated more than anything was having to deal with drunk patients while trying to heal their injuries. But they thought the law didn't go far enough since it did not limit how much a ninja could indulge themselves. Those who had been in the field knew and understood. Sometimes a ninja came home with so much blood on them that the only way to stay sane and get some sleep was to get totally shit faced drunk until you passed out or could finally cry yourself to sleep. Over time they convinced their fellows that ninja were not irresponsible drinkers. That ninja only drank to excess when the memory of the field got too strong to deal with any other way. And when a ninja got that way too often they were forcibly retired if they would not step down on their own. The medics pointed out that was why the council had set up two different work farms. One for those who could recover and one for those who couldn't. They pointed out that most the people in the second group had at one time been ninja who had just seen too much and done too much to ever function without the alcohol. It took graphic stories, from their own days in the field, to get their point across and more than one medic had nightmares from the stories their comrades told them but the civilian doctors and nurses did get the idea.
The Root Anbu was interrogated, with prejudice, by Ibiki and Anko to discover what he had thought he was doing and on who's orders he was acting. Inoichi sat in on his interrogation and Hiashi and Shikato watched through the one way glass. Inoichi was inside his mind while Hiashi and Shikato were watching his body language. Both the two men outside the room were doing the same thing but Hiashi was watching the inside of the man's body while Shikato watched the outside and Inoichi was watching the pictures in his mind. Together the trio would get a very complete picture of what the man had been doing.
When Ibiki and Anko had finished with the fool, his corpse was burned to ashes and the five had a very complete picture of Danzo's plan. The operative was to allow himself to be seen in different bars frequented by civilians. Since he was a ninja he did not have to worry about the three drink limit but Danzo had ordered he remain sober so as to not mess up his story. He was to make it seem like an accidental showing of the picture but to make sure the biggest, toughest, most block-headed civilian in the bar saw the picture of Naruto and lead the conversation to make it seem Naruto had an unhealthy relationship with the Kyuubi in one bar and in the next that he had employed a kitsune trick to coerce Kakashi into a relationship Kakashi would never have stooped to otherwise. In those bars, he was to make it clear he knew the silver haired ninja to be a heterosexual male who had honestly been looking for the right girl to father his future offspring. The operative had already spent two nights passing the picture around and working the civilians up against Naruto. He, the operative, said that when Danzo judged the people sufficiently upset and ready to riot on the Tower, he planned to step in and diffuse the situation. He said Danzo would claim the image as a forgery but also demand that, for Naruto's own safety, he be placed into protective custody until the civilians forgot about it. Of course, the operative smirked as he added, the civilians would never be allowed to forget about it as every few months a new picture would surface that would remind everyone the blond contained a demon. And in that way it would never be safe for Naruto to ever leave Danzo-sama's capable hands. Danzo-sama would control the Kyuubi weapon until the day it died or was rendored useless.
Author Note: And that's another chapter down. The plot is coming together and growing thicker. I wonder just how Naruto and Kakashi are gonna get out of this net? Can they get out of it? Hmmm . . . anyway, reviews are appreciated as always. Love ya all.