"Oh daaaannnggg…."

Tails could just stare at all the watchers that were flocking to Cream's profile. The fox slunk back in his computer chair and gawked at the 1500 watchers.

After what had happened at the mall the previous day, Tails had gone home and thought the whole idea through. Was it really fair to make Fiona hook up with Scourge? The two had hated each other just a week ago, and now because of some screw-ball idea the hedgehog and vixen had flounced off together on some McDonald's induced honeymoon. What was THAT all about?!

Still, it got Fiona off of Tails' back. And THAT was something he couldn't argue with.

This time, though, he would have to be extra careful. He couldn't just hook poor, innocent Cream up with some weirdo. No, he had to know exactly who she was running off with.

So when 1500 watchers had appeared on Cream's eHarmony profile, Tails couldn't help but slump back and stare at the amount of nerds and stalkers he had to sift through.

Taking a deep breath, the fox leaned forward and grabbed his mouse. His sapphire gaze scanned the first batch of names. OK, there was NO way Cream was going to date "Micheal_Jackson113". Nor was she dating "FootLicker2".

Tails began to get bored as he looked through the names, but finally came across one that he thought would be alright. "Lilac_Chamelenin" was lucky number 77. Well, lilac was purple, and 'chamelenin' was a mash of 'chameleon' and 'ninja', and there was only one person he could think of that fit the description.

When Tails clicked on Espio's profile, he musingly noticed that his location was Beijing, China. How did that happen? Also, Espio was online. Perfect. Now he could chat with him.

Creamy-Buns has entered chat.

Creamy-Buns. Ha! Tails thought that the username was very clever.

Creamy-Buns: Espio?! Why are you in Beijing?

Lilac_Chamelenin: Ms. Cream, if you don't mind me being rude…you of all people should especially know why I am in Beijing.

Well, darn. That meant Cream knew something that Tails didn't.

Creamy-Buns: Would you please refresh my memory Mr. Espio? ^^

Lilac_Chamelenin: Well…it's because you informed me of the Secret Society of Ninja Chameleons and their current state. They needed a president. Remember?

Creamy-Buns: Oh, yeah.

?????

Lilac_Chamelenin: In any case, I cannot find the Society. Are you certain you told me right?

Creamy-Buns: Would I ever tell you wrong, Espi-baby?

Lilac_Chamelenin: …? Ms. Cream? What's with the nickname?

Creamy-Buns: Isn't it obvious, Espio? Forget the Society. I want you!

Uh-oh. Was that too ambitious?

Lilac_Chamelenin: Oh…I see. Well if that is the case, why don't you come over to Beijing? Or we can meet somewhere else…

Creamy-Buns: No, Beijing is perfect. I'll see you soon! Muah!

Lilac_Chamelenin: Wait, where would you like to meet up?

Creamy-Buns: The International Airport, duh.

Lilac_Chamelenin: Alright then. I do hope Ms. Vanilla knows what you're doing.

Creamy-Buns: Screw that. Like I'd tell Mother!

Lilac_Chamelenin: Are you sure you are in good mental health, Cream? You aren't…drunk?

Creamy-Buns: Nope! (hic)

Lilac_Chamelenin: Er…

Creamy-Buns: I was just kidding, Espi-baby! I'll see you soon!

Creamy-Buns has disconnected from server.

Oh, man. That didn't sound like Cream at all. Would Espio suspect anything?

Suddenly, Tails' cell rang. The number was some foreign thing.

"Hello?"

"Yes, Tails, it's Espio."

What the…?

"I know this is going to sound odd, but I'm in Beijing right now, and I've just been informed that I'm going to date Cream…or something. So I wanted to ask you if it was alright. I know that she's had her eye on you, and you wanted to protect her…"

"Wait, this is coming from the same guy who thought I was taking advantage of her because there was a spider on her back?"

"In all defense, that was Vector's idea."

"Um…OK."

"So, would it be fine if I, you know, saw her?"

"Er…yes?"

"Excellent. I will see you later then."

With that, Espio hung up.

Tails stared at the phone for a long moment. There was a very contorted look on his face. Then, slowly, very slowly, he dialed Cream's number on his cell. The conversation was very short and very polite, in which Tails informed her about taking a surprise vacation to Beijing. There was a blood-curdling scream, then a giant 'YES!', then a dial tone.

Why did it have to be him? Why did Tails get the whack-job crushes?

Um, yeah…next chapter should be more eventful than this…so…ya'll review if you want. Please no flaming. It makes me sad .