Sorry for the long wait! I found myself a beta, thanks for all your help Kaikamahine Mai Hawai'i!

Just wanna point out, every single chapter in this series is a oneshot and they have nothing to do with each other. Each chapter is a seperate story unless I say so otherwise ^^ .

There's things I've done I can't erase,
Every night we fall from grace

Lisa is sitting on the floor in a corner of her bedroom; her knees are drawn up to her chest. She's bare under the large wool throw draped around her form and she sat facing the foot of her bed. In the bed is a man, also bare under the blanket; sleeping soundly on his stomach. One of his arms is thrown over the side she would normally lie in.

She is staring at him and slowly rocking herself back and forth, trying in vain to keep warm, although not caring that she's cold, not really anyway. She's shivering faintly, almost like her body is humming. Tears started to silently roll from her eyes; she left them there, too engrossed in her thoughts to move and wipe them away.

She should stop seeing him – Jackson, that is – but just the thought of pushing him out of her life feels more painful than their struggle during the red eye flight (and the struggle at her father's houseafter the flight). She didn't know what to do. There are just so many questions she's too afraid to ask. They're tearing her apart from the inside out.

Where is this relationship going? Will it go anywhere at all? Is this even called a relationship when he just shows up and stays over? They've never really had a decent conversation.

Will he eventually stop showing up? Will he just disappear one day and never return? Will it be because he's dead? Or will it be because he grew tired of her? Sometimes he vanishes for days in a row; weeks even. But he always comes back...for now. What if one day he doesn't come back? What will she do then?

Will he hurt her one day?

Every time he stays over, she doesn't sleep, or at least she tries very hard not to. She would watch him; make sure he won't go anywhere. She would occasionally cling to him as he slept, softly stroking the side of his face or his chest; making sure that he's really there, that he's real. Other times she would lie on her side, watching him in his slumber. Most of the time, he slept like a log next to her; completely relaxed and comfortable. Other times, when he would show up completely exhausted, or when he would show up with new wounds on his body, he slept fitfully – tossing and turning, groaning in his sleep – like he was still fighting whatever demons he had to fight in his waking life. Or maybe he was the demon and he was fighting an angel. Whatever. If she doesn't think about that, it doesn't bother her so much anymore. What he does is his business, and she doesn't need, nor want, to know.

As hard as she tries to stay awake, she always ends up falling asleep and he's usually gone in the morning. There were a few times he stuck around. She would wake up to him watching her for a change. He'd smile softly at her, almost sadly sometimes, and she would try to smile back, but it never comes out the way she would like it to. Her smiles were always laced with grief and he would always see through it. The times that he stayed through the night, he would put on a show for her in the morning. He would kiss her hair softly, caress her face with the back of his hand, he would even make breakfast. He'd also frequently embrace her through the day until he had to leave again. The longest he has stayed was three nights.

They never really talk to each other, not on subjects that really count anyway. When he decides to stay longer than a few hours during the night, their day is just filled with random small talk – something to fill the silence – although even that is starting to diminish. She's afraid he's going to leave without saying goodbye. He must say goodbye. If he said goodbye, then she would know if he means to come back. If he never means to come back, she can get on with her life instead of waiting for him. She always waited for him.

Lisa started to sob softly into her knees, pressing her lips to the wool throw to silence the shuddering gasps erupting from her chest. She's shivering very violently by now. Jackson stirred slightly, the sheets making a rustling sound. Lisa froze for one second before she quickly swiped at her face, removing the evidence of her unhappiness.

"Leese?" Jackson rasped as he ran his hand over her side of the bed, searching for her. His voice is husky and tired. He pushed himself up and looked around until his eyes landed on her sitting on the floor.

"Hey," she whispered, attempting a smile.

He grunted as he sat up and looked at her with his head tilted slightly to the left, "Leese..." They didn't say anything for a few seconds, just looking at each other. He finally stood up and padded over to her, completely in the nude. There's no need for modesty, he's been sleeping over for quite some time already. He knelt down in front of her and looked into her eyes curiously, "Lisa?"

She again attempted to smile, but it didn't turn out right and his face fell. He brought his hand up and cupped the side of her face, "You're freezing..." he said as he slowly stroked his thumb over her cheek, "come back to bed, huh?"

Lisa pressed her lips together and lowered her head; looking at him seems to get harder when he's being so kind. She couldn't tell if he's faking it or not; didn't know if she was just a random warm body to him; someone to fuck and hold to chase away his nightmares...someone that could easily be replaced by another warm body if she starts gaining a voice.

"Hey..." Jackson whispered while gently lifting her chin to face him, "Come on...let's get back to bed."

She looked away from him again, her eyebrows scrunching together almost in pain. She should really kick him out of her life before she gets in any deeper – she's already way too close – leave him before he leaves her. It would be less painful that way, right? After all, he is going to leave her, there's no question about that except "when?" He's Jackson Rippner for God's sake! No one can keep him, not for long.

Jackson ran his fingers across her cheeks, like he's wiping away tears – was she crying again? She couldn't tell. He leaned in closer, wrapped his arms around her and rubbed his hands up and down her back; trying to calm her trembling.

"Lisa..." he breathed into her hair. He shifted slightly and pressed his lips against her temple. He has stopped rubbing her back and just held her tightly. He trailed his lips down to her earlobe and gently nipped it; then he moved lower to her neck, kissing the pulse point. He trailed his lips back up, never once leaving her skin, "Come on, Leese..." he softly murmured. He pressed his lips against hers and she closed her eyes. "Come back to bed..." he whispered against her lips.

Lisa sighed deeply and her shoulders slumped, her eyes still closed. It's a sound almost like giving up. She swallowed the lump that seems to have developed a permanent spot on her throat to no avail; its still there no matter how many times she tries to gulp it down. "Okay..." she whispered back.

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