Authors note-Hey everyone!! I finally was able to update!! Sorry it took so long! Well this is a long chapter. I do not own any characters. Though I wish Nicky was mine. Haha. Poem at the end was written by one of my friends who passed away. I have edited the poem so it's not in its original form. If you'd like the original message me or review and let me know. I will send it to you. R.I.P. Sam. This story is dedicated to you.

Nicks POV…back at lab for first part.

I sat there. Thinking about all this time I could have had her. Protected her. This wouldn't have happened if I had just asked her out and we could of probably been married within these past seven years

"Hey Nick you need to get some sleep." I was so caught up in my thoughts that I didn't even here Warrick come in the locker room.

"I just can't stop thinking about her Rick. This is all my fault." I kept shaking my head. I didn't know whether I should cry or be angry.

"It's not your fault. Don't be stupid. They're okay. I know they are." Warrick kept soothing me with his words. I couldn't move. I could only nod.

When I was finally able to talk, I didn't know if I could trust my voice, but I talked. "If I had just asked her out in the first place, none of this shit would be going on!"

Now I was furious. I punched the locker not giving a damn about what it would do to the locker or me.

"Nick man, chill. Sara and Grissom are tough and make a great team. We'll find them and whoever did this. But I'm confused about what you said first…"

I looked up at Warrick to see him look like he was 'thinking' about it. "You've got a crush on Sara, my little sister, and you've been holdin' back?" His voice went up in pitch at the end, which confirmed he was just messin' with me.

"Yeah, I am. I have been since I first saw her. I should have said something to her." My anger was now gone from the way the subject was heading. "I don't know what I'd do if she, and Grissom, were gone forever."

Warrick just sat there, staring at the lockers ahead of us. The silence gave us some time to think about what it would be like if they were both gone. We knew that the both of us would just barely be able to make it.

"Rick, go home to Cat. You should be with her instead of me. I'll be fine. I need to head home anyway and get some sleep." I lied. I wouldn't be okay. I wouldn't be able to sleep.

"You sure Nick? I bet Cath wouldn't mind if you came over and stayed with us. She knew you two had a thing for each other. You know how good she is with that." Warrick said standing, stretching, and then going to his locker.

"Yeah I am. Thanks for the offer but I'd feel like I was intruding. Plus I need to let max out." (Max is my golden retriever. He's about 7 now. Sara loved to be with him. She'd take him to the park and run with him…)

"Okay. I'll see you soon. Give me a call if you need anything. I'll be right over. Get some rest." With that Warrick shut his locker gave me a hug and then said, "see yah" again and left me alone.

I shut my locker, headed to my car and drove to the one place I knew would tear me apart but also calm me down. Sara's place

Sara's apartment

As I let myself in using the key Sara gave to me, when she left for a seminar so I could water the plants and take care of her kitty Mr. Fluffy.

(Mr. Fluffy is a big white fluff ball, very fluffy. His name suits him well. And he's only a kitten.)

Mr. Fluffy came bouncing over to me, rubbing up against me, purring like a motor and meowing like he couldn't stop. "Alright Mr. Fluffy, let's get you something to eat."

Mr. Fluffy kind of bounced over to where his food sat, only a little left, and waited while I poured him some more. "MEOW!" "Yeah Mr. Fluffy, I miss momma too."

I went over and sat on the couch. Mr. Fluffy came right over, jumped up beside me and rubbed his head against me. "Okay, okay. I'll pet you fluff ball." "Meow!!" "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

I sat there petting Mr. Fluffy for a good amount of time. He had, had enough and went to go explore again. "Sara, I'm sorry I let you down. I love you so much. I hope you're okay."

I grabbed one of Sara's journals and a pen, opened up to a blank page, and just started to write.

Favorite Song Gone…

It's the little things that keep me close to you

Your gap tooth smile

Your little laugh is the prettiest sound I've heard

That's my favorite song

That's what I'll never forget

The way we are close to each other

When the cold wind blows

While we walk down the sidewalk

The way you tell your stories

That makes me laugh 'til I have no more breath

The sad stories you tell me

I wish you didn't ever have to know

The saddest part is when the story is over

But it's over for just the moment

You always remind me

Of summer days when you're near

How you brighten up my day

By just a glimpse

Of your beauty

The moment you say my name

There's never a noise in its way

My favorite song stopped playing

The day I no longer saw your beauty and grace

But I will still always love it

I cannot sleep with a pretty girl in my dream

That I can no longer see

I slept with a terrible dream last night

That you forgot who I was

Right now you're a thousand miles out of my reach

Out of my path

The spark of our hands as they connect to dance

Made its final spark

Just yesterday

We were dancing to nothing

But the sound of ocean waves crashing softly

Whoever that is with you

I won't allow to stay

The only one who's best for you

Is your favorite fan

Don't be shy to call me to tell me you miss me

There's only one girl in line I'm waiting for

That's you sweet darling

You're eyes

Your voice

Your smile

But mainly

You

It's the little things that made me fall in love with you

Your gap tooth smile

Your little laugh is the prettiest sound I've heard

That's my favorite song

That's what I'll never forget

Life goes on

I know

But it's much more quiet

Than it was only yesterday

It seems like you've been gone forever

But it's only been a day

I miss your beauty

I miss your presence

I miss the stories about you growing up

I miss my favorite voice being heard

I miss you

Thanks to everyone who stuck with me and read the chapter!! I am proud of this chapter. I think one more will do. Then it will be the end of this story. I will make a sequel. I promise!!! Next chapter should be long!! And very, interesting. R&R!!!