A/N: This is the alternate ending to Chapter 3. It is very, very similar in the early stages, diverging slowly and ending quite differently. Perhaps a tad bit OOC, and as was pointed out to me, venturing into the realm of surrealish Crack!fic.

Disclaimer: I still don't own Scrubs! Gosh, you're starting to make me feel bad here.

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His Limits – His Oscillation

Perry Cox knew his limits.

He swallowed once, hard, and grazed JD's shoulder once more with his thumb.

JD's eyes fluttered closed as he carefully tilted his head to the left, capturing Perry's thumb between his shoulder and cheek. Perry could feel his slow, rhythmic breaths as they played across his hand, soft and warm. Even softer and warmer, surprisingly, was JD's cheek. It was almost unbearably smooth, leading Perry to guess that JD had shaved not long before he had arrived. A warm feeling spread outward from the pit of his stomach, spreading delicious tendrils throughout his body. Something huge was building, a great wave about to wash over them, and Perry didn't know if he wanted to stop it.

The wave crested above them. Perry was underwater, fearing he might drown, but equally wondering if he could float. So Perry, hopeful for the first time in ages, reached for the sky. He turned over his hand, palm up, cupping JD's face almost tenderly.

JD released his grip on his own knee and reached unhesitatingly to wrap his slender fingers around Perry's wrist. His eyes had snapped open, luminously reflecting the light from the television, as he stared bewildered at his mentor's hand for the second time that evening. After a long moment realization registered in JD's eyes, and Perry felt that warm, pleasant feeling rising. He couldn't quite recognize the look on the younger man's face and so he stayed stock still, pulse quickening slightly with anticipation. Seconds or minutes or hours ticked by as JD contemplated the hand in front of him, until finally his eyes slid shut, eyelashes glimmering in the dim light.

"I'm sorry," JD whispered, pressing his lips to Perry's thumb.

His eyes stretched wide in disbelief, Perry could only stare as he careened down a path that he hadn't foreseen taking. He felt detached again, hovering above incorporeally and watching JD kiss a hand that wasn't his, almost wishing that it was. He tried to grab hold of one of the fleeting thoughts ricocheting around his brain, hoping to use it as an anchor to pull himself back down so that he could participate. The closest he got was wondering if someone had turned the heater on by mistake, and thinking that perhaps an arm's length was far, far too long.

JD apparently felt the same about the distance. Swiveling fluidly on the couch, he threw a folded leg up between them and shifted several inches closer, facing Perry without opening his eyes. Both of JD's hands were around Perry's now, and he drifted from finger to finger, grazing his lips across the tip of each before moving on. He punctuated each kiss with the faintest sigh of an apology.

"Sorry." His index finger. "So sorry." Middle. "So," ring finger, "so," pinkie, "sorry." He rested his forehead reverently upon Perry's palm for a moment, murmuring his atonements.

Perry's breath caught in his throat. His chest burned with something he was almost willing to name and his arm tingled obscenely from the dark, unkempt hair brushing across it. The realization hit him that JD wasn't apologizing to him; rather, he was apologizing for him. His heart leapt up into his throat and he had to force himself to breathe again.

If you think you're sinning JD, well, that might make two of us then.

JD seemed to sense Perry's indecision. He parted his lips slightly and moistly kissed the vulnerable underside of Perry's wrist, leaving a warm, wet spot that cooled slowly under his breath.

Perry felt a wild shiver travel up his arm and down his back, eyes closing momentarily as the sensation overtook him. Yeah. Definitely two of us. By the time his eyes opened, JD had trailed similarly intimate kisses up his arm, coming to rest at the crook of his elbow. The younger man seemed to be paused again, waiting for a signal to continue. His nose barely skimmed the tender spot, almost nuzzling it.

Perry hesitated, holding his breath.

JD continued to wait.

Finally, the tension was broken by Perry's sigh. "Newbie," started Perry uncertainly, his voice low. When the other man didn't respond, Perry sighed again, this time resigned. His limit lay thoroughly forgotten behind him. His head was thick with alcohol, and his tongue was disobedient. He couldn't stop the torrent of truth that came rushing out. "You can't blame yourself. It's not your fault. Dan's a jerk. He's a stupid, selfish idiot. He should've asked. He should've known. They should've known. I… I should've known."

JD chuckled hollowly against Perry's arm, scattering puffs of air across the limb he still desperately clung to. "Yeah, sure. Talk down the drunk boy, put him to bed, pat him on the head. Hopefully, if you're lucky, he won't remember anything in the morning." He shifted yet closer, pressing his lips to the inside of Perry's bicep. "Not gonna work this time. Nice try, though." He kept his head down, not daring yet to make eye contact, busying himself with absorbing the heady combination of scents that dwelled in the vicinity of his mentor's arm: aftershave, dryer sheets, scotch, and something tantalizingly unique.

"Damnit, JD, I never wanted to save you, not once," Perry whispered, grateful for JD's downcast gaze. He was sure the younger man would be devastated by the sentiment in his state, but to his credit JD merely tilted his head slightly, waiting for an explanation. Alright then, as long as we're playing truth or dare here… "I wanted to watch you fail. I wanted you to suffer. I wanted you to see just how backwards the system is, how there is evil in everything and everyone, how the good guys don't always win, and-"

"Shut up," growled JD, and Perry nearly jumped at the forceful command. "Just shut up right now and let me do this, or get to the point if you have one, because I'm never going to be able to do this again and if you're just going to ruin it for me you might as well go."

A sudden urge to flick JD's ear briefly gripped Perry, and he almost laughed aloud at the thought. Talk about a moment killer. Damn, when did I get so loopy? And where was I going with this? "Excuse me Princess, I definitely had a point. I wanted you to fall on your face. But you always defied me, somehow. You took the bad things just hard enough, and came back to work like you knew, you absolutely knew it was going to be alright. You hung all over me and took my asinine remarks as gospel, a kernel of truth in every rant. I never meant to save you. You were just--" He managed to cut himself off, almost revealing too much.

JD simply breathed against his skin, knowing he would go on. As Perry had urged him to move with the barest touch earlier, now JD was trailing his fingers against the strong arm before him. He licked his lips and moved yet closer.

"You were you," Perry blurted out, heart hammering in his chest.

JD's head snapped up, his face inches from Perry's, his eyes alight.

Oh God…

"You wanted me to fall?" whispered JD, a smile on his lips but not in his eyes. "Well, here I am, mid-air, going down, full speed ahead. This is your big chance to save me, but on purpose this time." His gaze flicked back and forth between Perry's eyes and his lips, and the meaning was unmistakable. "Last chance."

Perry swallowed hard. Here goes nothing. "No?"

The smile on JD's lips reached the rest of his face then. "Right answer," he murmured, barely leaning forward to lay a soft, lingering kiss along Perry's jawline. He felt the older man shudder slightly, and grinned. "Rock bottom smells really, really good." JD giggled.

With a sharply exhaled breath, Perry regained some focus. "Hey now, you lulled me into a false sense of, well, something, with that Serious Newbie act. Bring her back. I think I liked her better." His idle hands twitched, but he somehow kept them from wandering toward JD of their own accord.

That comment earned Perry a pout as JD pulled back to look at him. "That's not nice, on multiple levels. But it does mean you like me at least somewhat as Normal Me, which is a step in the right direction. Oh hey, you know what would be another step in the right direction?" JD stood abruptly, offering his hand. "The one that would put you closer to my bedroom!" His mouth stretched into a bright smile.

Perry groaned, trying not to wish those smiling lips weren't still at his neck. "First of all, what you just said? That was horrible. Second, if you haven't noticed already, we are incredibly wasted. I don't think going in there with you would be the best choice at this point. And third… well, there isn't really a third. Just, I'm really kind of in a daze here." JD looked disappointed, but not overly so. Damn kid and his perpetual resilience.

"I wasn't planning on doing anything. I just wanted to be with you, is all." JD stared at the floor.

"Oughtta bat your eyelashes and squeeze a few tears out next time. You'd be more persuasive that way." Perry smirked half-heartedly, crossing his arms over his chest without much authority.

JD looked down at Perry with a frown. "Fine, then. Have it your way." He marched, mostly in a straight line, to his bedroom. Perry sat confused for a moment, almost entertaining the idea of going after him, when JD re-emerged with an armload of blankets and pillows. He dropped one of each on the floor, and tossed the rest in Perry's lap. "You can sleep on the couch." He began to arrange his floor-blanket, pushing the coffee table away to give himself a bit more room. Settling onto his makeshift bed, JD turned to look up at Perry. "If you have to get up in the middle of the night, please don't step on me." He fluffed up his pillow dramatically, carefully laying his head upon it.

Perry blinked. "You're going to sleep on the floor, when you have a perfectly good bed? What the hell is wrong with you, Newbie?"

Sighing, JD propped himself up on his elbows and looked up blearily. "We sort of just went over that, didn't we?"

A pause. "Newbie…" Perry started, his elbows propped upon his knees, leaning over JD, his face in shadow.

"No, stop." JD stared up at his mentor. "I know you don't like to talk about things, and God, you've talked to me more tonight than you have in the past three months. You must be tired of it." He grinned, trying to play the statement off as a joke although they both knew it to be true. When Perry didn't smile back, JD's grin faltered, and he spoke again. "But I… I understand if…" The gears turned visibly, his mouth working to produce words that weren't readily forming. Finally he decided on, "If you want to forget all this, that's okay. I'll go to sleep, and if I get up in the morning and you're not here, I'll get it. I can't expect you or Turk or Carla or anyone to come to my rescue anymore. I can handle it." And with that JD lay down on the blanket, turning his head away from the couch, and closed his eyes. "Good night, Dr. Cox, and either way, thank you," he said softly.

Perry couldn't say anything to that. He's giving me an out. After all that. He simply sat there, staring at the kid for a long while, before arranging his own blanket on the couch and falling into an uneasy sleep.

---

JD awoke with a start the next morning, sitting up abruptly before realizing that doing anything abruptly was a horrible idea. He moaned, shielding his eyes with his hand before lying back down. When he was sure that his head wasn't going to explode, he tentatively removed his hand from his eyes and glanced up at the empty couch. The blanket was folded neatly, the pillow placed carefully atop it. He sighed deeply, bringing both hands to his face and scrubbing at it roughly. Damnit.

Eventually the sounds of someone puttering around the kitchen reached his ears. The fridge opened, closed. A utensil of some kind dropped into a bowl. The burner on the stove clicked on. Liquid was being poured, and the distinctive sound of eggs being scrambled completed the symphony. Well, his brain and his chest hurt, but at least his stomach would feel good. Thank goodness for Carla. Even though he would've preferred the uplifty-ness of waffles this morning, he couldn't complain with Carla's eggs.

Sitting up more carefully this time, JD dragged himself to his feet. The morning light streamed in the window, and he rubbed his squinting eyes as he shuffled to the table. "G'Morning. Thanks for cooking."

"No problem, Molly. Welcome to breakfast. Want cheese and onions scrambled into your eggs, or shall I draw a smiley face with them on the pan like Mommy always does?"

JD's head shot up, eyes wide, and he didn't even care that his brain was bouncing back and forth like yesterday's jell-o. It wasn't Carla making breakfast, oh no, it was Dr. Cox, and he was still here, and he was beating the eggs in that bowl with a fork like his life depended on it, and he was grating cheese and slicing scallions and he was in the kitchen and hadn't left, not even a little bit, and all JD could think to say was, "Does that make you Emilio Estevez? Because even though you slept on my couch and probably haven't combed it yet I think your hair is way cooler than his." He grinned foolishly.

"Let's try this again," Perry said, eyes glued to his task. "It's not that difficult. Cheese and onions, no cheese and onions. Yes, no. Yeah, nah. You betcha, no way Jose. Da, nyet. Ja, nein. Hai-"

"Dr. Cox," interrupted JD urgently. A small crease formed between his eyebrows, and he placed his palms on the table, leaning forward.

Perry stopped chopping, knife paused about to cut through a stalk of onion. He didn't meet JD's gaze, but in his peripheral vision he could see JD's tense body language. Oh God, can't we at least get through breakfast before he starts in on the whole relationship thing for the love of—

"Dr. Cox," JD said again, "I have something important to ask you."

The knife continued slicing slowly through the onion, coming to rest against the cutting board with a dull thunk. "What is it, Newbie?"

JD gulped. Licked his lips. "Um, what, uh, I mean… what kind of cheese is it?"

Perry considered the knife in his hand, thinking very seriously about committing seppuku. Instead, he answered evenly, "provolone."

The grin was back. "Yes, please!" announced JD, perhaps more enthusiastically than he meant to.

Perry began to stir the piles he had prepared into the bowl of eggs. "Atta girl Claire," he muttered. "Hope three eggs is enough. There's gonna be toast, too."

JD was practically swooning, beaming at Perry as he assembled breakfast. He had so many things to tell him. "Carla usually makes me five," was what he chose to say.

"Five?" Perry's eyes were wide as they finally focused on JD. "Are you trying to send your cholesterol through the roof?"

"No," said JD defensively. "I just really like them."

Perry snorted. "Well so do I Newbie. But at least I know my limits."

The corners of Perry's mouth twitched as soon as the words were out. When Perry started snickering to himself, JD cocked his head curiously. The snickering soon evolved into chuckling and then full-blown laughter, and even though he had no idea what was so funny, JD couldn't help but laugh too, because he knew whatever it was must be really funny, and he hoped that it would soon be an in-joke between them, and damn, did it sound like music when Perry laughed like that. And he had the most wonderful feeling that from now on all of his Sunday mornings would be sunshine and eggs and laughter.