No I do not own FMA, wish I did, but I don't.
Sorry for any spelling errors/typos
Havoc drove them to Roy's house. The ride was silent as Ed looked out the window. Dark clouds showing that it was going to rain soon. They drove past several streets, what's usually a bustling town -from Roy's description- seemed almost ghostly in it's empty-ness.
When they arrive, Ed grabbed for Alice as the man named 'Havoc' opened the door for him. Ed and Roy walked up the steps, Alice still in Ed's arms. They both turned around and Roy saluted respectfully to Havoc.
"So this is 'our' house?" Ed asked as Roy fiddled with the keys until managing to open to large wooden door.
"Yeah, nothing huge, despite what my rank usually calls for. All we needed though nothing extra." He motioned for Ed to sit on the couch as he grabbed the little girl from his arms. He left the mid-size room with her, heading down a neutral colored hallway. He came back through the same open doorway, though this time carrying several books that looked like photo albums. Roy handed them to Edward with a kind smile caressing his face. "Here. A man named Hughes took a lot of picture of you and your brother when you were younger, whenever you saw him. Though you weren't always informed of the pictures getting taken."
Ed flipped open the large book, looking at the individual pictures. A suit of armor always appeared next to him and he was confused as to who or what it was. So he asked..."Who's he?" Ed pointed at a picture of the armor; in the picture he was holding a kitten, Considering the size of the armor it was quite an odd picture.
"He's your brother." Roy pointed to one of the pictures where you could see a glimpse of metal arm between sleeve and glove. "See that, where your hands metal? The same incident is what caused your brother to be trapped in that armor." Roy chuckled slightly at the picture on the top of the next page.
"Roy.." Ed started but trailed off as he continued to observe the same picture Roy had been.
"Yeah Edward?"
"You look drunk." Ed continued to observe the picture, he could clearly tell Roy had grown older since then, noting that the small light of gray hairs weren't in the man's hair, when the picture had been taken."What in the world caused you to look like that?" Ed asked, confused as to what had happened back then.. Even knowing Roy for the new short time he'd had, he could easily see that whenever he spoke of something painful or spoke to other's there was a mask to ward off all emotion to his expression. So why he'd dropped it then was more the question.
"After all these years, I can't remember." Roy responded back. He sat on the back of the couch, placing his legs so that they leaned against Ed's arm. He leaned his head down to place on Edward's head, ruffling a few strands of hair as he breathed in and out. The blond blushed slightly, though continued looking at the pictures.
After a few pages Ed noted that there was almost a permanent scowl planted on his face. "I wasn't a happy teenager, was I?"
Roy chuckled at Ed's question. He remembered the scowl he had, had,. Some days he missed it, though he could usually bring it out by calling the blond short. Though after his teen years he had finally grown to a normal height. "No you weren't. Though no one could blame you with the past you had."
Ed motioned so his eyes looked up to the raven haired man. His eyes, showing slight pain, though more of pity as if this was someone else. When it was himself he was looking at. Though was he the same, neither knew, and for now, neither wanted to. "And what kind of past did I have?"
"To say the least...it was tragic." He slipped down the back of the couch till he naded next to Ed. "Your dad left you and your family while you were young and Al still a baby. Your mother died not too long after that. Then you and your brother tried to bring her back."
Ed thought pensively, letting his mind work all the things he'd learned and try to place them together. "Take it, that's how I lost my arm and leg and my brother his body."
Roy looked over at him, 'Well that was fast.' Then he thought about it, Ed was the prodigy. Even without his memories, intelligence was still a virtue greatly used. "Yeah it is. Then I showed up at the doorstep, and asked you and your brother to join the military. You ended up joining around the age of twelve. A prodigy indeed."
"Excuse me?" Ed looked over to him and Roy took the opening. He pressed his lips to Ed's softly, as Ed flailed his arms in surprise. "What the hell was that?"
"A test." He said back, though he turned away from him.
"A test? A fucking test? What were you testing that would have led to kiss me?" Ed asked, a small pit of anger in him released at Roy's uninvited contact. A small touch here and there was obvious for the mans comfort, but kissing was still uneasy. Yes he found the man attractive, and he seemed very kind at heart. But just knowing him for the short time was not enough. Even if the same soul resided in his body.
"I'm sorry, But it's the same." Roy responded back guiltily, though a small pit of hope opened up as he had figured it out.
Ed inched a little bit away from him, though stayed on the couch. "What the hell are you talking about?" Ed asked, he'd lost the bite to his questions, but anger still swelled through his clouded mind.
"You had the same reaction all those years ago when I had first kissed you. Though add a good swift kick to the shin and getting called a dirty old man. But other then that you hadn't done anything. You didn't comment on it, you didn't hurt me ..badly, and you were calm from then on about it. Something back then that Edward had barely managed to do. Something I wonder truly if you can do." Roy babbled on and Ed thought about stopping him, when it hit. He may have lost his memories, but it was to test him. Knowing that his mind still resided in there somewhere probably had brought the man much hope. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. I understand fully now what you were trying to do and if it had been you who had lost the memories, I'd probably have done the same thing." Ed thought about that for a long second. Roy had ignored telling him something and he wanted to know. "What happened that caused my lose of memories?" Ed asked sudenly and Roy shot a worried glance over to him before leaning his head against Ed's arm.
"I was hoping to not have to tell you." Edward puffed out a sigh, almost telling him 'you honestly expected me not to want to know?'. Something he usually expected from the blond. "Fine I'll tell you. The doctors told me that accumulated stress, starvation, and emotional tragedy led to it. They say a build up of those caused your mind to overflow, and you were deeply depressed whenever someone wasn't talking to you. Even then it was still pretty bad. You couldn't even sleep, and one night after waking up n a hospital you had forgotten everything."
"The reason for all that accumulated stress? Torture. We were in the midst of a war and they had captured you. I wasn't even aloud into battle being of my rank, and having a daughter here to hold me. Though I wish they had let me I would have been able to protect you." Ed looked at him as he regretted his large position. He felt bad for the older male. Though it sounded like these memories were going to be hard to look through. Even if he imagined them as someone else, that wouldn't stop nightmares, thoughts, opinions, from pouring into his mind.
"To continue the Ishballan's had tortured you'd badly. You kept them busy so they wouldn't attack anyone else. Probably saved over 100 if not more. You did anything to help them and while the final wave was breaking off they went through one more session with you. It finally broke you through. Though by then, it was only a burden for me and you to carry through us. The last one was probably the worst they'd done to you. Worse then you, or anyone deserved, deserves. You were raped, and beaten. They left a permanent mark in your skin at you upper thigh. A small symbol burned through your skin with cigarette's. A symbol they had etched into you." Roy didn't tell them that the symbol had been burned -through another source- enough as to not be able to tell what it was. He didn't feel like he needed to cause extra worry over himself and if Ed really cold trust him.
"In the end you managed to save them, but afterwards lost yourself in nightmare's and your memories were hurting you physically from the inside. Though somehow you tried, damn you tried so hard to smile. I think you got a pure one maybe once when Alice had done something funny, but I thought over time you'd be okay. After being in a massacre of a war, that maybe the nightmares and pain would stop, like it had for me. I only lived because I was too cowardly to end it." Ed looked over at him, wondering what he meant. Then he realized it and Roy could see the recognition in his eyes. "Yeah, a man named Marco stopped me once, and I couldn't manage any other time. Though the man is no longer alive. Died shortly before the second Ishballan war we had."
Ed thought over it and continued to look through the pictures. He found more of the office and noticed that there were 3 people who he hadn't learned about. A stout man with orange hair, a tall, standing straight, gray haired man, and a black haired male. The last one barely looked in his teens. "Who are these people?" Ed finally asked and pointed to the three males.
"That's Breda...Falman and Fuery." Roy had a slight hesitation to his voice on the last two names, and Edward couldn't place why. As if reading his mind, Roy continued. "Breda has been busy lately so he hasn't been able to visit you. The other two won't be able to. They didn't make it." Ed realized he was talking of the war, and he had to think of how bad this rally could have been to cause so much damage and violence.
"What happened to them there?" Ed asked and Roy sighed. He had been re-analyzing the events in his mind, but that was quite different then speaking them aloud. Ed knew this, but he couldn't stop now. He wanted to know, needed to.
Ed could see the obvious mask of strength, and hard-ness cover his expression and he felt sorry for being the cause of it's use. He suddenly sounded more business like and Ed couldn't decide wither to be worried of it, or thankful that at least now Roy was saying something. "They were killed in action. Falman had died when they blew up a medical tent. He had been helping out the injured when it happened. Fuery...Fuery died saving his friend. He took a bullet for Havoc. After that, the guy didn't even know what hit him. He probably had about 10 officers pointing a gun at him, before Havoc fired. I think that was the one man he really killed. It's a war of course there's death. But I think whoever it was who killed Fuery, was the first man Havoc was fully aware of what he was doing and had no regrets over it."
Ed thought over that, and couldn't really grasp the meaning of it. Though he could tell that Havoc must have deeply cared for this Fuery. "Were they lovers? I mean, Havoc and Fuery." Roy looked at him surprised though he shook his head.
"No. More like brother's. They looked out for each other. Havoc, ...is with Hawkeye. She's the one that visited you shortly after we found out you had lost your memories."
Ed nodded, remembering who the woman was. From what he knew of her, she was oftly demanding and he wondered how someone could be in love with her. She seemed kind at times, but was that really enough. 'I guess if Mustang's telling the truth then it must be true.' Then he wondered and thought about something. "Will I ever get my memories back, or will I just simply learn what they are and create a new life?"
Roy was startled by the question, but saw no reason to not answer it. "The doctor said that you might. Though you might not. Usually victim's of extreme amnesia will slowly begin to remember things, or feel like you've done something before. A lot like deja vu. Other's will begin to have dreams, in your case nightmare's as to what happened."
"Oh," Ed felt tired after the day and could feel his eyelids growing heavy. Roy could see the tired-ness in his voice. Roy moved behind him, till his legs wrapped around Ed. He knew Ed felt uncomfortable at a certain range of touching, and Roy ignored it for now. He hadn't been able to sleep one night without Edward there. He wanted this and Ed didn't object to sleeping against the male. They both leaned back on the ouch till d lay on top of him, both looking up.
Ed slipped into a dream, that slowly turned worse.
And there is chapter 2 of this. I am working on Changed Identities so don't think I've forgotten that story. It just takes longer to update it. I hope you liked the chapter and it's sadness. As I warned this has angst, and lots of character death. SO be warned of that. Thanks readers and reviews of the first chapter.
Just cause I feel like saying it, I am going to the Death Note live action movie Wednesday. XD. It's airing throughout the US so if you get to see it hope you enjoy as well.