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I never thought I had to see my girl like this. With someone that definitely wasn't me. Both girls were so engrossed, that they didn't notice me until I fell to the ground. The loud noise must have startled them.

Is it possible to die of a broken heart?

I didn't even had the chance to see much before everything went dark. But just by thinking about the short glance I got makes my heart start to ache in this abnormally painfull way. Lilly and Miley were doing things only me and her were supposed to do. Only people who care about each other were supposed to do.

I often dreamt about our first kiss. How it was going to feel. Clammy hands and racing hearts. The feeling of thousands of butterflies in both our stomachs. It was supposed to be her first kiss too. I waited so long for that to happen and now part of it was ruined because I wasn't going to be her first. But I'm sure I'm going to be her last. And it won't matter anymore because it will feel like nothing else we've felt before.

And this kiss I just had to witness, will be long forgotten. The girl she is sharing this kiss with, will be long forgotten.

The scared look on her face was the first thing I saw, when I opened my eyes. She held a cold washcloth to my forehead and I just had to smile. She was taking care of me. She was taking care of me and not Miley, who I noticed was sitting on the couch with an expression just as scared as Lilly's. This was how it's supposed to be! She was smiling now. Had she finally realized? Was this why Miley looked so scared sitting alone on the other side of the room? It had to be.

"Your smiling!" she stated. Of course I'm smiling. How could I not smile? You finally saw what I've been seeing all the time. So I told her just that.

"Of course I'm smiling!" She looked so happy right now. Her eyes became brighter every second. She let out this really cute squeal and pulled me into a tight hug.

This was it! My dream came true. And all it took was this little kiss between her and Miley. I bet she was thinking about me and that made her realize. Or maybe she knew all the time and just wanted to make sure. Everything was going to be perfect now. Miley could still be our friend. But I wouldn't like them to spend so much time together anymore. Lilly was my girlfriend now. And somehow I have this feeling that Miley won't accept that Lilly wants me and not her.

I noticed Miley was sitting next to us now. She looked happy. Happy for Lilly and me? Ohhh! I get it now! They planned this, didn't they? They wanted me to walk in on them in this position. Maybe they weren't so sure of my feelings for Lilly.

"We didn't know what you were going to do. We were scared that you wouldn't want to be our friend anymore."

"You should have just told me. It would have made things a lot easier. And I think I knew for a while now." I smiled at them

They were so amazing. And Miley doing this just for me and Lilly to get together. I couldn't be happier right now.

But why were they still holding hands? You don't hold hands with another ones girlfriend. And I know for sure that your not looking at another ones girlfriend like that. Lilly will tell her right? She will and then she will stop to look at Miley like that. Like she can't see anything else at this moment. Like nothing can face them. And she will stop leaning toward her right now. In just a second she will smile at me again and then we will leave Mileys house. Maybe we can share our first kiss later? Go see a movie or do something else couples do together. Why is everything moving so slow? Is that Lillys hand on Mileys cheek? Is she pulling her closer?

I was starting to get dizzy again. And starting to see things that weren't really there? Did I hit my head when I fell earlier? In my imagination I saw their lips locked together. Just like a few minutes earlier. Why was my mind doing this to me? They pulled away from each other and just leaned their foreheads together. And at this moment I finally realized. This wasn't about me and Lilly at all. I've been completely wrong. But why are they doing this?

Do they think they love each other? What are they? And why are they kissing again?

Miley looked at me now. My girl had her head buried into her long brunette hair.

"We didn't know if you were against gay's so we were scared to tell you. But it's great that you are ok with this" She had her hand in Lillys hair and stroked her softly.

How much I would give to feel her soft hair against my skin. Or to feel her smooth lips against mine. Why was this happening to me? What have I done wrong?

Lilly nodded against Mileys shoulder "Yeah we are so happy Oliver"

They are happy? What about me? Can't they see that I'm not ok with this? That I'm not happy? Can't they see it in my eyes? Or do they just don't want to see it?

They tell me it happened back in Tennessee. That was 4 month ago. How didn't I notice this? They say they're in love. Even before they went on that trip they've had these feelings.

I left them alone then. Alone at Miley house. What were they going to do? More kissing? Holding each other close? Do all the things I yearn for? The things I've been dreaming about for so long now? What was I supposed to do?

I never felt so much pain before. Someone had taken her away from me. Right from under my nose. And to make things worse it had been my best friend. A girl. How could I end this pain? Jump off the next bridge? Take some pills?

Then I would lose her forever. I still had a chance. I could bring her back on the right way. Bring them both back. I just had to figure out how.

Everything seemed the same at school. Everything was just like the day before. Except this now chronic ache in me. They didn't kiss at school. They don't want anyone else to know yet. They are scared that people would break them apart. And just like that life had given me a new chance.
They would soon see how wrong this all is. See how it's supposed to be. But how was I supposed to do it? They can't know it was me. Lilly would hate me.

At lunch time neither girl was to be seen. They've never ditched me before. Something must have happened and I went to look for them. I wish I could say I didn't find them. But I did. In another just as compromising position as yesterday. But today I knew what to do. It had to be done to get my girl back.

Next morning everybody was to be shocked. Looking down the hallway I could see my work. Every single locker had a white piece of paper sticking to it. Soon everybody would know. Everybody would start talking. Talking about their "relationship" and how wrong it was. Lilly was going to be sad and I would be there for her. She would cry on my shoulder but soon she would get over it. She would move on with me and Miley would move on with somebody else. And this phase would be forgotten.

The soft murmur was the first sign of people arriving. I needed to get out of the hallway. It may be suspicious. I needed to act just as shocked as everybody else. I needed to seem just as angry as Lilly and Miles.
Only a few minutes later everybody was going wild waving the pictures around in the air. And that was when I saw them. Every single person was staring at them but nobody said anything. My girl looked so confused and suddenly scared as she took the piece of paper from her locker. I could see her eyes widen and the fear was clearly visible. Miley took a look at the picture than at the students around. Everybody looked at them anticipating their next move.

Miley looked like she was going to say something. Stupid girl. Like anything she said would make this better. Teenagers were cruel. Nobody would accept them. The girls would see that this relationship is nothing but a big mistake.

"That's right guys, it's us. Lilly and are in love and nothing can break us up. You happy? Nothing your going to say is stopping us. We're happy together."

The chattering started and it grew louder and louder. Somewhere I could here some clapping. People caught on and soon nearly everybody had joined in.

Why were they clapping? This was wrong. This isn't what I wanted to happen. They need to stop clapping. She is my princess and I'm her prince charming. Miley is the evil witch holding us apart. Why won't they stop the clapping? Why were they doing this? Why wasn't going anything my way? Were people happy that they were together? I think I heard a "About time" and "So cute". This wasn't cute. It was wrong. They pain in my chest grew stronger and stronger. I couldn't bear it anymore. I had to get out of there. People were walking up to them. My girl looked so shocked but her eyes were glowing. Never had the color been this intense.

I walked the other way. I couldn't do this anymore. I walked out of the school and just sat against the wall. I couldn't stop it anymore. The tears kept spilling out of my eyes. Had I really lost the only thing I ever wanted? Was it really over or was this just another obstacle I needed to overcome? I had to get myself together. Lilly couldn't see my like this. Nobody could see me like this.

What if she finds out that it was me behind the pictures? Will they be mad? Everything went out great for them. Still they can never find out. My tears finally stopped and my breathing became normal again. The only thing reminding me of everything was the shooting pain left in my chest. I walked back inside and everything looked like always.

I spotted Lilly and Mily hugging closely by their lockers. Even their these were right next to each other. I should have seen it long before. Even the rumors were true then. I was so blind.
I put on the best smile I could muster and walked up to them.

Lilly grinned at me and pulled me into a tight embrace. My head fell onto her shoulder and I could smell the sweet scent of her hair. The girl I'm holding so close wasn't mine. She belonged to someone else. But why couldn't I bring myself to accept it?

The afternoon was spent on the beach. Just me and Lilly because Miley had a doctors appointment.

Lilly was quiet but she looked content just lying in the white sand. She wished she could go with Miley to the dentist. She wished she could be with her every second of the day. She missed her so much right now. They were going to be so happy. They just had to tell their parents. She's never felt so safe with somebody. She looked for great and got amazing. She never knew she could love a person so much. Her heart is racing just thinking about her. When they kiss everything fades away. Nothing matters anymore when heir together. She needs Miley and hopes that she needs her just as much. Butterflies can't compare to what's going on in her tummy when they're together. Their first kiss was shared in the barn after feeding Mileys horses. She knew she was in love when she had first laid eyes on Miley. She had found her princess. Her soulmate.

When Lilly told me all these things I couldn't help but ask myself: "Is it possible that your soulmate already has one that isn't you?"