CWCollateral: A Tale of the Resistance

by Manajerkop

What happens when innocent bystanders get fed up with enduring the fallout from Sonichu's zappin' adventures? REVOLUTION, that's what! Experience Sonichu from a whole new perspective, as the PVCC fights to end the tyranny of Christian Weston Chandler.

15. Chapter 11: Aftermath

CWCollateral: A Tale of the Resistance

by Manajerkop

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Chapter 11: Aftermath

June 4, 2008, CWCville, Upper West district, CWCville Penitentiary, B Block, 5:54 p.m.

"…and Lolisa and I just wanna give a huge shout-out to all our homebros and homegals in the Chaotic Combo and the EHPF who went through so much HARD WORK and STRESS today in the battle for our beautiriffic city! Guess those lame-o's at the PVCC are gonna think twice next time before they try and shatter all True Love Couples in CWCville again! Ha ha! And we'll be there to stop 'em and save da day, all day, every day! Now here's Lolisa with an update!"

"Hey. Hey!" Kuri pounded on the bars of her cell in an attempt to draw the attention of the two mercenary guards outside. "True Blue, I'm talking to you! Can you make them switch channels or something? It's not like Jamsta's gonna thank you guys! Come on, we're dying in here!"

"At least they're not playing music," Nate spoke up. "If one can even call that shit 'music'."

"Shut up," snarled the taller loyalist. "Look, I hate it too. We all do. Just shut up and pray that Bubbles takes you soon." He chuckled. "Ain't no radios down in the Abyss."

Kevin shuddered and leaned back against the cold concrete wall of his cell. There was no climate control in the prison save for air conditioning, and while that might have helped in the heat of the day, evening was coming, and soon a chilly night would fall…according to Jamsta's weather predictions. He didn't have any faith in the DJ's skill as a meteorologist, but judging by the fact that his breath was quickly becoming visible, it was still going to get pretty damn cold.

After arriving at CWCville Penitentiary and being searched by more mercenary soldiers, half of the Honey Badgers had been divided up and placed in B Block with an assortment of thirty to forty other captured Jerkops from various squads, including two Picklemen, a Tomgirl, and one of Bagget's Bastards. Al and the other Badgers had been assigned to a different block, while B held Kevin, Nate, Steve, Kuri, Serge, and Zoey.

"You okay, bro?" Nate asked quietly, and sat beside Kevin. "Come on. It's gonna be all right."

"All right?" the Jerkop murmured in a distant voice. "Did you see what happened? Walsh couldn't even beat Sonichu, they only lost Megagi, and we didn't even get to kill her ourselves."

"Master of Anticlimax, remember?" added Zoey broodingly, calling upon Magi-Chan Sonichu's well-earned nickname to emphasize their defeat even further.

"Do not speak of purple crazy shock-pig to Serge," Serge growled, clenching a beefy fist until his knuckles popped. "No one takes Baba Yaga from Serge. Serge will make them pay."

"We heard you the first time, Big Bear," Kuri sighed, and began twirling a few strands of hair around her fingers. Her horned headband and Poké Balls had been confiscated, but at least the guards hadn't strip-searched her or the other Honey Badgers. "Steve, how are your hands?"

"Fine," the squad leader replied tersely, and flexed his injured fingers back and forth beneath the bandages. "Right now, these are the least of my problems."

"Well, we need to do something," continued Nate. He glanced at Kuri. "Idea! Kuri, strip down and see if you can seduce one of the guards."

"In your dreams, pervert," growled the Jerkop. "Keep thinking. Or better yet, don't."

Kevin let the snippets of Jerkop conversation wash over him, focusing instead on the memory of the kiss with Allie back in the barracks of Menchi-Nasu. It had been only a matter of hours since then, but with all that had happened to the PVCC during the June Offensive's pathetic five hour war, it might as well have happened half a lifetime ago. Now Allie was gone, imprisoned with the other half of their squad and probably wondering what had happened to him.

So many Jerkops captured, so many civilians killed, so much destruction and chaos…and it had all been for nothing…nothing but a dead skunk recolor and a few hundred dead Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. Kevin would have liked to hope that at least they might have dealt a heavy blow to the chu population, but considering how fast and how often the creatures reproduced, it was little more than a fool's hope. The city council would, of course, heap another few ridiculous taxes onto the poor of CWCville to pay for the damages, and the cycle would go on as normal.

The feeling of helplessness, though, was simply infuriating to Kevin. His weapons were gone, his friends had been separated from him, and worst of all, he couldn't do anything. The bars of the cell were too strong for even Serge to break, armed loyalist guards patrolled every corridor and floor of the prison, and the only thing that now awaited him and his comrades was whatever doom that Bubbles Rosechu was preparing for them down in the Abyss – the dreaded sublevel of CWCville Penitentiary specially created for her unique form of interrogation.

Minutes ticked by, each one more agonizingly slow than the last. The KCWC news program continued on and on about how heroic the Chaotic Combo had been in the "CWC-Defense" of their city, and how the Jerkops had, according to Jamsta and Lolisa, staged the June Offensive to shatter all True Love Couple hearts. Worst out of all of these audial nightmares was an interview with the Sonichu children, who (as Kevin understood it) were the chus' equivalent to baby Jesus – the first of a new generation of heroes their species could look up to. The interview, obviously, consisted of a barrage of inane twee-speak, and nothing more. If Steve's rage at hearing their earsplitting voices could have been focused into pure energy, the resulting explosion would have vaporized a good chunk of Virginia's landmass, and perhaps even part of Maryland.

Finally, after what seemed like hours of waiting for something to happen, Kevin closed his eyes and began drifting off, completely exhausted. Zoey and Kuri were already snoring in the corner of the cell, Nate was well on his way, and only Steve and Serge seemed to be awake and carrying on a hushed conversation. Kevin silently hoped that whatever they were talking about had to do with some kind of escape attempt. Before he knew it, sleep had claimed him.

---

June 5, 2008, CWCville Penitentiary, B Block, 2:15 a.m.

"WAKE UP!" yelled Nate, shaking Kevin roughly as the cell block shuddered violently and loose pieces of concrete rained down from the ceiling. In the distance, gunfire and panicked cries echoed through the prison, interspersed with a strange high-pitched noise that sounded like electronic laughter. "Kevin! Kevin, come on! Get up!"

"Nate?" Kevin blinked hurriedly, his heart pounding and his hair soaked with cold sweat. "What happened? What's that-"

"Looks like Walsh didn't forget about us after all," Steve chuckled triumphantly, grabbing Kevin's hand and helping him onto his feet. "They're giving the mercs one hell of a fight. If I know anything about PVCC raids - and I do – they're going to head right for the mainframe and get these cells unlocked. Once that happens, we're gonna head straight for the armory and get our gear back. Then we find Al and the others."

A metallic clatter sounded from the far end of B Block, followed by the familiar ding of the large transport elevator. Kevin looked over to see a trio of mercenary soldiers in riot armor sprinting down the aisle toward the control room. It didn't seem right – even in a situation where the Jerkops had them outgunned and outmatched by Transformer support, Chandler's mercenaries usually stood their ground. Whatever the situation was out there, it was far from normal.

"Close that door! Seal off the block!" the foremost merc yelled into his radio, waving to the technicians in the control booth. "Goddamn it, how many did we lose?"

"No fucking idea," spat the sergeant. He glanced up and looked around the room, observing the confused faces of the Jerkop prisoners. "Doesn't matter. Keep an eye on the rebels."

"I got a better idea for you, jackasses," the operative from Bagget's Bastards suggested in a terrifyingly calm voice from the cell directly across from the Honey Badgers'. "You tell your little techie friends to open all these cells and the armory, and we let you walk out of here alive."

"SHUT UP!" barked the third mercenary, and hurried across the aisle toward the elite Jerkop. "Give me a reason, motherfucker. As far as we're concerned, you're all hostages now…and you're all expendable. If they send anything nasty in, we're gonna start gunning you down."

"Big words from one of Chandler's True Blue bitches," sneered the Tomgirl operative, a black man who seemed somewhat familiar to Kevin, though he couldn't quite remember his name. "You scared of us? Aww, don't worry, dawg. We won't tell anyone you shit your pants and-"

CLANG! A thick steel grille slammed into the concrete floor and broke apart, rattling ominously as the stunned mercenaries and Jerkops slowly traced its path of descent back up to an air duct set into the ceiling. Squinting his eyes, Kevin scanned the metal passage for signs of movement, then suddenly drew back in shock when the entire duct began shaking chaotically.

"Shit. B Block, open the inner security doors." The mercenary sergeant paused, tapped his radio, and cursed violently. "Goddamnit, B Block, what the fuck are you doing? OPEN THE DOOR!"

There was no response from the cell block's technicians. Instead, a high-pitched, unquestionably mischievous squeal rang out from the soldier's receiver.

"Tee hee! I'm in ur control room, unlocking ur cells! LULZ!"

BZZZZZT! Simultaneously, every single prison cell in B Block unlocked itself and slid open. Wasting no time, Steve and a few other nearby Jerkops lunged through the doors toward their captors, but the would-be prison riot was quickly halted when the mercenaries snapped into a triangular firing formation and leveled their guns at the approaching rebels.

"Stay…back…" growled the sergeant, and took aim with his M4. "Get back in your cells or-"

"Or what?" replied the Tomgirl with an intimidating smirk. His eyes narrowed. "We gave you fair warnings an' shit, dawg." He glanced up at the air duct. "Looks like your time just ran out."

A single flesh-colored object - about the size of a Sonee and bearing what looked like a full head of scraggly green hair and two horned antennae - burst out of the duct and plummeted toward the mercenaries, then spread a pair of blue bat wings and leveled out right in front of the sergeant. Its toothy maw spread into a huge grin, wider than anything Kevin could have imagined.

"Problem?" it squeaked, and immediately opened its mouth. "IMMA FIRIN' MAH LAZ0R!"

SHOOOOOOOOP! A blinding beam of blue and white energy exploded from the little creature's throat and struck the mercenary full in the face, literally disintegrating his head into a bloody spray of black smoke and sizzling gore punctuated with skull fragments and pieces of armor.

"WHEEEE! UR HEAD A SPLODE!" cried the murderous imp as the man's decapitated body collapsed to the floor and spasmed violently in death. Satisfied, it turned to the last two soldiers and narrowed its eyes. "Not sure if going to fight…or surrender. U mad, bro?"

"Fuck this," muttered the second loyalist, and threw down his shotgun. "Dave, it's over."

"Cheating sons of bitches." The third merc handed his assault rifle to the member of Bagget's Bastards, who smiled and accepted the weapon gleefully. "Get out of here then, you assholes."

"My pleasure, dawg." The Tomgirl and three more Jerkops grabbed the two men and quickly confiscated their ammo, pistols, and knives. "Anyone wanna give up a room for my homies?"

"Right over here," Steve answered, and pointed to the Honey Badgers' former cell. By now, Kevin and the others had all filed out, leaving it just as empty as it had been prior to their arrival.

"Yo, that's all fine an' shit, man," replied the operative with a chuckle, and roughly shoved Dave into the cell while the two Jerkops holding the other merc pushed their prisoner in as well. "Hey, I know you, dawg! Shit, man, they got you too?"

"Doesn't matter now," the Bagget's Bastard cut in as the little winged imp flapped over to the cell and zapped the lock with a little burst of plasma from its armstub, melting the door shut and sealing the mercenaries inside. "What matters is that we're out, we've got weapons, and it looks like we've got backup now." He glanced up. "Question is…what the hell are these things?"

"They see me trollin'," sang the tiny creature absent-mindedly, and grinned. "Problem?"

"That's a Devil Troll, in case you're interested, Kirby," Mary Lee Walsh's disembodied voice echoed through B Block, startling the Jerkops. "An experimental LIESA unit. Vivian's got them hacking the prison mainframe as we speak, but they only managed to breach this block first."

Kevin looked up to see more of the little drones pouring out of the air duct and flapping down to join the first one. Glancing over his shoulder, he could see another five cavorting around in the control room of B Block, plugging the USB ports on their tails into various devices while a group of loyalist technicians cowered in fear against the wall. A smile of relief quickly spread across the Jerkop's face as he watched. It hadn't seemed possible, but now they had a very good chance of making it out of CWCville Penitentiary alive and in one piece.

"Commander!" Steve pushed through the crowd and waved to the first Devil Troll, who quickly glanced down at him. "Steve Morrison, Honey Badgers squad leader. Are Al and the others…"

"I don't know," Walsh responded quickly. "Vivian's trying to hack the surveillance network, but the security's giving her problems. We should have access to the other blocks in a minute. Until then, make your way to the armory and get your gear back. At least we've got control over that."

"Right," Kirby grunted, checking his new M4 carbine's magazine. "Lars, what'd you get?"

"Shotguns, dawg," the Tomgirl answered as he heaved a SPAS-12 to Steve. "Yo, incoming!"

"Thanks!" shouted Steve, and caught the weapon. "Any more squad leaders? Any Manajerks?"

"They took all the Manajerks to A Block!" yelled a Jerkop from the crowd.

"Then that's where Al's gonna be," the squad leader muttered to Kevin and the other Honey Badgers. He attempted to open the combat shotgun's breech, but winced as his injured fingers slipped against the weapon. "Fuck. Zo, here, you take it. I'm no use like this."

"Give it to Serge," Zoey suggested. "I'm horrible with shotguns. Too messy and clunky."

"Is not Baba Yaga…but Serge can still break many shock-pigs and cowards with tiny weapon." Serge grabbed the SPAS-12 and dramatically cocked it, racking an unfired shell out of the shotgun in the process. It was more than obvious that he'd never used one in his life.

"Steve." Kuri glanced around as Jerkops rushed past, all shouting to each other and attempting to reconvene into their separate squads. "Steve, we've got to get Aldo and Luxo back. Do you think they put the captured Pokémon in the armory or…" Her voice broke suddenly. "Or would they-"

"Don't even say that," Zoey reassured her squadmate. "They'll be fine. You're gonna want to send them both out as soon as we find 'em, though. The Combo's probably on their way right-"

"DOOM doom doomDOOM doom doom doomdoom doom! DOOM doom doom! Doomydoomy doom doomdoomdoom DOOM doom doom doomDOOM doom DOOM! The end! HI THERE!"

"SUZI?!" The Jerkop was nearly knocked flat as the overjoyed LIESA unit dropped down from above and landed right in her arms, still wearing her fake Rosey costume. SUZI immediately clamped her hydraulic armstubs around Zoey's face and hugged it, her eye-screens flashing with little digital hearts. Had Kevin not been so utterly perplexed and thrilled by the combat drone's sudden arrival, he might have warned Zoey to get it away from her face before SUZI's stub-blades malfunctioned. Thankfully, that didn't happen.

"Ugh…SUZI, you've gotta stop doing that," laughed Zoey, and placed the robotic Rosey down on the floor. "How the hell did you get here? Did you see Al or any of the others on the way in?"

"I like playing with my new INSANE friends!" explained SUZI, twitching as something blew up inside her head. "The pretty Satan lady said I could go on a field trip to Alcatraz if I was good!"

"So you tagged along with the…Devil Trolls?" Steve asked confusedly, still unable to believe that the giggling little imps were actually costumed LIESA units. "I swear, if this is one of those top secret things that Al never told us about, I'm gonna spike his next tequila shot with BYD. Well, if we get out of here, anyway. Also, Kuri, what the hell are you doing?"

Kevin glanced over to see Kuri cuddling a Devil Troll in her arms while two more scampered up and down her legs and arms like little monkeys, squealing happily and reciting various memes.

"Oh, for Arceus's sake," Zoey sighed. "Kuri, put them down. Now's not the best time for that."

"Come on," Steve growled, and stepped into the elevator with a vengeful gleam in his eye. "It's high time we got out of this hellhole. And I want my kukri back."

The sounds of battle still echoed through the facility, some far away, some nail-bitingly close as the thirty Jerkops made their way into the elevator. Even with the Devil Trolls as support, they wouldn't stand a chance against a full platoon of mercenaries and EHPF officers. The Combo had doubtlessly ordered reinforcements to hold the prison while they finished "cleaning up the city", but in the absence of the elite chus, the rebels were still heavily outgunned.

"Kirby, McNulty, Morrison," Walsh addressed the squad leaders, using her personal Devil Troll as a remote speaker. "Until we get through to A Block, you three are in charge of all PVCC operative activity in the prison. I want each of you to take charge of an offensive – one group to hold off any loyalist reinforcements that show up, one group to clear out the top levels, and a last group to head into the sublevels. We've got some high-value prisoners down there, and unless Bubbles killed them, I'm pretty sure they want to escape from here quite a bit more than you do."

"High-value prisoners?" asked Nate under his breath as the elevator doors slid shut around the escapees. Lars punched the button for the ground floor, and the entire lift began moving down, bringing the Jerkops closer and closer to the fighting.

Zoey nodded. "Yeah. They'd be in the Abyss. Bubbles likes to keep her enemies close."

"I'll take my team down there, then," announced Kirby. "If we need to go through Bubbles' playground to get everyone out, then bring it the fuck on."

"No, we'll take it," Steve spoke up. "Divide up the group and take the top with the Trolls. You guys are better against mercs, anyway. There shouldn't be too much security for us to deal with on the way down to the Abyss. And Bubbles isn't even there – she's with the Combo."

"I got no objection here, dawg," Lars added solemnly. He glanced at the digital screen above the elevator's control panel. "Yo, Boris, get to the front!"

"Go! Go!" Nate and Kuri pushed Serge up in between Kirby and Lars, just as the elevator ground to a halt. Outside, the sounds of gunfire and panicked shouts mingled with the loud SHOOPs of laz0r beams and giggling Devil Trolls. Zoey picked up SUZI and placed her on one of Serge's massive shoulders, giving the Russian man a makeshift sentry turret of his own.

DING! The heavy doors of the elevator slid open with a hiss, revealing a scene of utter chaos. Dead mercenary guards and broken LIESAs lay strewn about the corridors at random, while red emergency lights spun around wildly and sirens blared through every level of the immense atrium. Here and there, squads of mercenary soldiers and prison guards traded shots with flying Devil Trolls, giving as much as they received with volleys of shotgun and assault rifle fire.

"Commander," growled Kirby toward Walsh's Devil Troll as he took aim at the nearest group of loyalists, readying himself for a long and bloody charge across the prison. "Open the armory."

The little drone winked, and a pneumatic hiss sounded from the door directly beside the elevator.

"That…was a lot easier than I thought it was gonna be," commented Zoey, and shrugged.

"Security breach," an automated female voice addressed the Jerkops. "Armory has been opened by unauthorized users. Lockdown initiated. Step away from the door. Step away from the door."

"JERKOPS!" shouted a mercenary as he gunned down a Devil Troll and pointed to the elevator. "Fucking hell, we got rebels loose! Put 'em down, boys!"

"Go. Go!" yelled Steve as the unarmed Jerkops poured out of the lift in a panicked rush with Kirby, Lars, and Serge in the lead. "Into the armory! Get the weapons!"

The shooting began seconds later. Kevin lost his footing almost immediately, knocked over by the stampede as bullets and buckshot tore through the air around him. Steve, Zoey, and Kuri disappeared into the armory before the young Jerkop had a chance to yell for help, and there was no sign of Nate in the chaos erupting across the atrium. Out of the corner of his eye, Kevin could see several men and women collapsing to the floor, but forced himself to crawl onward, fervently wishing that his brother hadn't been among the PVCC dead. A bullet smashed into the wall less than a foot behind him, and another two ricocheted off the floor inches from his feet.

Out of nowhere,SUZI landed on the floor in front of him, her cloth Rosey costume still intact.

"HI THERE!" she greeted the fallen Jerkop, and waved. "Gimme a huuuuuug or I KILL YOU!"

"SUZI…" panted Kevin, desperately looking around for his brother. "SUZI, where's Nate?"

"Uh…I gotta go find…stuff…to shoot," mused the little combat drone, and took off without another word. Gritting his teeth and cursing in frustration, Kevin rolled over onto his back and sat up, hoping that the mercs wouldn't notice him until he could get to safety. Serge and the two squad leaders were still holding off the loyalist attack fairly well, supported by a few Jerkops who had managed to grab their weapons from the stockpile in the armory.

The deafening rattle of an assault rifle and an SMG echoed through the atrium as Zoey and Kuri burst out of the armory, firing arbitrarily into the surprised groups of mercenaries while more and more armed PVCC soldiers surged past them toward Lars, Serge, and Kirby. Both of Kuri's Poké Balls now hung from her belt again, along with her new custom-forged tekko-kagi. Encouraged by the arrival of his squadmates, Kevin dashed for the armory door.

"SERGE!" Zoey waved to the colossal Russian as two Devil Trolls and SUZI hovered overhead and unleashed a furious volley of tiny plasma blasts and machine gun rounds from their respective stub-guns. "SERGE, GET OVER HERE! WE FOUND BABA YAGA!"

"AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!" Serge's deafening roar of triumphant laughter thundered through the prison. "COME TO PAPA SERGE! IT HAS BEEN TOO LONG, DARLING!"

Through the smoke and strobe-like flashes of gunfire, Kevin could see a huge shape barreling toward the armory. The SPAS-12 was gone – Serge had no need of such an inferior weapon when his beloved minigun lay within reach. Chuckling with immense relief, the Jerkop grabbed his AK-47 from a rack and hurriedly began loading a new magazine into the breech.

"Security breach," the PA system crackled again. "Lockdown protocols corrupted. D Block has been opened by unauthorized users. All security personnel, report to the atrium. Security breach. Lockdown protocols corrupted. E Block has been opened by unauthorized users. 113. Security-"

"We got D and E!" yelled Kirby, looking across the hall as two more transport lifts began rumbling their way down toward the ground floor. "Everyone, give 'em covering fire!"

DING! DING! Both elevators opened simultaneously, disgorging twin waves of former Jerkop prisoners into the prison lobby. Kevin fired off a few bursts in the general direction of the mercenaries, taking care not to accidentally gun down any of the PVCC personnel sprinting toward the armory. The mere idea of murdering Allie or Matt or any of the missing Honey Badgers via friendly fire was simply appalling.

"OVER HERE!" Zoey shouted frantically, beckoning to the group of unarmed operatives as Lars and Kirby directed their ragtag assault teams onward through the atrium-turned-battleground. Half a dozen Jerkops were either struck or killed by loyalist fire in the mad rush for the armory, but by now, the growing army of rearmed and furious fugitives, Devil Trolls, and SUZI was proving too much for even the well-trained mercenaries to handle.

Kevin whirled away from the door just in the nick of time. The stampede of frantic Jerkops would most likely have trampled him where he stood had he not moved. As the horde of relieved men and women scattered through the armory to claim their confiscated weapons and gear, he began hastily scanning the crowd for any sign of his squadmates. If they'd been killed…

"Get him in there! Easy! Easy! Keep the wound above his head!"

Allie and Nick pushed their way into the room, carrying an unconscious and frighteningly pale Matt while Jexis hurriedly pressed bundles of cloth against the Jerkop's bleeding shoulder.

"What the hell happened?" yelled Steve, who – unable to hold Origin without extreme pain - had been making himself useful by passing out ammunition to the incoming Jerkops. "Guys, what did they do? Anyone else hurt?"

"Loyalist cocksuckers!" snarled Amanda, and sprinted in behind the other Jerkops. "They cuffed him to a radiator and started kickin' his shoulder over and over, right in the fuckin' wound."

Kevin dashed over to his squadmates just in time to see the Honey Badgers lowering Matt down to the floor while Jexis and Steve retrieved a first aid kit from a pile in the armory. Allie looked up, surprised, and their eyes met for a split second. Then the urgency of the situation kicked in again, and their reunion ended almost as soon as it had begun.

"Arceus," swore Jexis, and knelt beside the injured Jerkop. "He's gonna need a transfusion."

"Hey." Nate limped into the armory and rolled up his sleeve, panting from exhaustion. "Anyone miss me? Let's just say one of those mercs really wanted me dead. Lars got him, thank Arceus."

"Goddamnit, Nate," Kevin growled as he embraced his older brother. "Listen, I got this. Don't-"

"Too late. Jexis, needle me." The Jerkop held out his arm to the medic, who hesitated briefly, then wound a strip of medical tape tight around his bicep and gently slid the tip of a syringe into his vein. Working quickly, she inserted another syringe into Matt's limp arm and connected the two with a length of clear plastic tubing. Blood quickly filled the tube, running down from Nate into the injured operative in a solid red stream.

"Good work, Jexis," muttered Steve. "Okay, everyone listen up. Al's still in A Block, but we're gonna have EHPF and merc squads coming down on this place in a matter of minutes. There's a bunch of high-value prisoners down in the Abyss that we're gonna set free. Kevin, Allie, Amanda, Nick, Kuri, you come with me. Zoey, Nate, Serge, Jexis, stay here with SUZI and keep an eye on Matt. If Al shows up, I've got my radio."

"Sometimes I think you're trying to kill me, you blond bastard," Nick snapped, but grabbed his sniper rifle and machete all the same. "Whatever. Better than dying in a cell."

"I'm just hoping no one dies, period," the squad leader responded quickly, stepping up to help Allie retrieve Trogdor the Burninator from a large pile of weapons marked SPECIAL - UNCATEGORIZED. "Heh. Guess they didn't know where to put it."

"Guess not," replied the young Jerkop, and slid her welder's mask down over her head. It took Amanda a few seconds to locate her own grenade launcher in a pile of RPGs and other explosive weapons, but eventually, the small team of operatives had returned to full combat effectiveness. Kevin felt complete again with his pistol and George's hunting knife strapped to his belt, and from what he'd seen, his AK-47 was still performing admirably. He was more than ready to go.

"Fucking yes," breathed Steve as his injured, trembling fingers closed around Origin's grip at last. "I swear, I'm gonna gut the son of a bitch who fired that Javelin into the Bus." He glanced up at the Jerkops assembled around him. "All right, stay close. We'll take the central elevator."

"Aw, really?" Amanda muttered sarcastically. "I was hopin' we'd have to take the stairs."

The squad leader glanced back and winked – an easy task for him. "Don't give me any ideas."

"Noted." The Jerkop gave her grenade launcher's drum a quick spin. "Lead on, Big Boss."

"I was wondering when you were going to call me that," replied Steve with a dry chuckle.

The fighting had died down to a few scattered shootouts by now, but Kevin and his squadmates made their way across the atrium with caution nevertheless. A few Devil Trolls hovered and flapped around Kuri, some even landing on her shoulders and head. For some reason that Kevin couldn't explain, the little saboteur drones were incredibly fond of her. Maybe it was the horns.

"Commander, can you hear us?" Steve asked one of the LIESAs warily. "We're heading to the sublevels now. We can get some of your Devil Trolls into the systems down there."

The saboteur drone paused briefly, then spoke in Walsh's voice. "I read you, Morrison. Take these three with you – they'll do all the hacking work while you clear out the Abyss."

"YES!" Kuri pumped her fist excitedly and gathered all three of the Devil Trolls into her arms for a group hug. The drones squeaked with surprise, but within seconds, they were all hugging her back. Steve just rolled his eyes and led the Honey Badgers onward, into the elevator.

"I swear, that Abyss better not be a whole fuckin' crazy water maze or something," Amanda muttered as the doors slid shut behind her. Steve pushed the last button on the control panel, and the lift began slowly moving downward, into the bowels of CWCville Penitentiary. "So how come you lucky bastards got out first? I was stuck in D Block with Matt and Jexis."

"Thank the Devil Trolls and Walsh," Steve replied. He let out a sigh and slid down the elevator wall to the floor. "Let's just…let's just worry about the other prisoners and Al right now. We can talk about this more when we get back to Menchi-Nasu."

"And how the hell are we gonna get out of here without being shot and zapped?" asked Nick.

Steve paused. "Fuck, I didn't think about that part. Guess we'll just shoot our way out?"

"I suppose." The Jerkop toyed with his sniper rifle and glanced up. "Is it too late for me to go back and trade places with Zoey or Serge? I don't like the sound of this Abyss place."

"Come on. We got your back, hermano," Amanda reassured him halfheartedly.

Kevin remained silent, looking from Allie to the rest of the Honey Badgers nervously as the digital screen ticked down through each sublevel they passed. Visions of dark, frightening torture chambers straight out of the Dark Ages filled his imagination – iron maidens and racks and thumbscrews and all sorts of cruel and unusual interrogation machines that Bubbles loved to use for her horrific hobbies. If only the Combo knew the truth about their allegedly retarded sister.

"Sublevel 13," announced the computerized voice as the elevator doors opened with a DING! and an ominous hiss, revealing a dimly lit metal corridor. "Please continue to processing room."

"On me, Honey Badgers," Steve ordered, and drew back Origin's hammer with a sharp click. Kevin and Allie followed him into the hallway, with Amanda, Nick, Kuri, and the Devil Trolls taking up the rear guard. There hadn't been any mercenary guards waiting for them, but Kevin wasn't so quick to dismiss the possibility of an ambush. The loyalists were smart, much smarter than their EHPF allies. If anything, the Jerkops and LIESAs were even more vulnerable down in enemy territory, with no way of knowing where Bubbles was keeping the prisoners.

A single sealed door lay at the end of the hall, beneath a sign that read PROCESSING ROOM. Steve turned to Kuri and plucked one of the Devil Trolls off her shoulder, then held it next to the lock. The little drone obediently activated one of its plasma stubcannons and blasted the entire mechanism into glowing slag, freeing the door and allowing Kevin and Nick to force it open. The other two trolls leapt into the air with glee and headed for the ceiling, each one dispersing into a separate air duct to seek out and hack any security mainframes that lay on Sublevel 13.

"Oh no you don't," Kuri scolded the last Devil Troll and grabbed it by its USB cord tail as it flapped its wings in an attempt to join its fellow robots. "You're staying with me, little guy."

"Y u no let me HAAAAAX?" the LIESA unit sighed disappointedly. "Gaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy…"

"We might need your laz0r," explained the Jerkop. "Also, you're gonna need to hack some stuff in here too. Just stay with me and blast anything I tell you to, okay?"

"Me gusta," replied the Devil Troll, prompting a double-take from Nick.

"Breaching!" yelled Steve, and kicked the door in. Allie pushed past her squadmates and fired off a quick burst of burning fuel in case any mercs were waiting just inside the next room, while Kuri and Kevin stepped up to scan for further hostiles. The sight that lay before the Jerkops, though, was nothing like what they had been expecting.

"Whoa…" whispered Kuri as the last few flames from Trogdor's blast sputtered and died out. At first glance, the room appeared to be some sort of exhibit for aquatic life, illuminated by rows upon rows of eerie blue LED lights that ran along the walls and floors like the bioluminescent glow of some bizarre jellyfish from a deep ocean trench. The sound of dripping water echoed through the cavernous atrium, accompanied by the low hum of some kind of energy and distant splashing sounds. Three rows of giant cylindrical tanks, each one about seven feet tall and filled with cloudy greenish water and a single gently pulsing blue light, stood in the middle of the giant room, while a massive sheet of clear glass covered the entire eastern wall. It looked like an aquarium – the most terrifying aquarium that either of the Jerkops could have ever imagined.

Kevin took a deep breath and stepped inside the antechamber, praying that there weren't any loyalist soldiers with night vision goggles waiting to ambush them…or something worse. Kuri and Allie followed cautiously, then Steve, then Amanda and Nick. As each of the Honey Badgers entered the unnerving room, a collective intake of breath spread through the group. This was an evil place, a place that no free Jerkop had ever seen before, a place where unspeakable atrocities had been committed against the most infamous convicts of CWCville Penitentiary.

The domain of Bubbles Rosechu.

"Watch the shadows," instructed Steve as the Honey Badgers made their way toward the rows of luminous tanks. "Kuri, loose that Devil Troll. We've got to find a way to get those cells open."

Kuri nodded and released the little saboteur drone, which immediately unfurled its wings and lifted off into the air. Once it had reached a satisfactory height, it began circling around and scanning the room silently, trying to pinpoint a suitable control node from where it could begin its vicious onslaught of viruses and hacking programs.

Something moved inside the giant aquarium on the east wall – a colossal shadow that shot past in the blink of an eye. Kevin drew in a startled breath and looked at Steve confusedly, but the squad leader hadn't noticed. His eye was firmly focused on the closest tank, and the obscured figure who drifted limply inside the enveloping liquid.

"Arceus," Amanda swore. "So that's where she keeps 'em."

"Hydrostasis." Steve rapped the glass with Origin's barrel. "It kinda figures that Bubbles would find something like that to use for her personal prison cells."

"They're…are they alive in there?" asked Kevin in astonishment.

"Looks like," replied Nick. "Sedated too, probably." He looked up, searching the room for the hovering Devil Troll. "Hey Kuri, where'd your little friend go?"

CLANG! SPLASH!

Kevin nearly jumped at the loud clatter of metal against the black stone floor. As he and the other Honey Badgers whirled toward the sudden sound, they found themselves staring at a little crumpled pile of sparking circuitry and sodden cloth. It could only have been one thing.

"No…" Kuri whispered in horror, falling to her knees beside the destroyed remnants of the Devil Troll. The entire LIESA lay in a growing puddle of water, its eye-screens blank and grey. Its tiny body had been violently crushed by an immense amount of pressure, and now lay broken and useless inside its flimsy stitched-together costume.

"Not a very good swimmer, is he?" a girlish, high-pitched voice snickered, seemingly from all around the Honey Badgers. "I wonder if you'll do any better at my games!"

With a shuddering hiss, the entire room began to shake. As Kevin and his squadmates looked on in disbelief, the floor beneath them shifted and slid back to reveal a ring of circular pools around the hydrostasis cells, all connected to one another by an underwater Plexiglas tunnel network. Schools of tiny fat black and blue fish frolicked and darted around in the water, some even leaping up and splashing around happily on the surface like miniature seals.

"Isn't it just so whimsical?" giggled Bubbles Rosechu as she rose, ominously, from the pool in front of the Jerkops, lying teasingly on her side on a quivering pillar of water. "I love surprise parties! We're gonna have so much fun together! Hee hee hee!"

"Madre de Dios," Nick murmured. Moving almost all at the same time, the Honey Badgers raised their weapons and took aim at the blue Rosechu, but found themselves confronted by a shimmering sphere of water. Bubbles floated and frolicked around playfully inside, laughing and spinning innocently as if daring the Jerkops to shoot her.

"Not now!" Bubbles's amplified voice cautioned them, echoing through every pool in a sort of aquatic speaker system. "Wait for the rest of the guests! I even invited Momma! You'll love her!"

"Son of a bitch," growled Steve. "We walked right into a free-for-all."

"Bullets ain't gonna do shit to her with that water shield," Amanda whispered to the other Honey Badgers out of the corner of her mouth. "Grenades. Steve, we gotta use grenades."

The blond Jerkop nodded slightly, then resumed speaking to the Rosechu. "Oh? You invited your mother, Bubbles? I thought you Combo fuckers came from a rainbow time warp or something."

"Hee hee! Nope!" Bubbles wagged a finger at Steve. "Momma's the best! You're gonna love her! I'll make sure she gets to have lots of playtime with you, Mister Silly Pirate!" She glanced back at the giant tank. "Yay! She's here! Well, be a gentleman and go say hello!"

Before any of the Honey Badgers could react, Bubbles lunged out with an arm and sent an airborne stream of water flying across the room and into Steve's chest. Like some transparent offshoot of the Blob, the rippling liquid spread around the Jerkop's body in the blink of an eye, encasing him in a globe of clear seawater. Suspended by the watery sphere, Steve struggled and thrashed around in a panic, barely managing to break through the surface and draw one last deep gasp of air before the hovering stream withdrew its drowning captive into the pool.

"STEVE!" yelled Kevin, Allie, and Kuri simultaneously, their eyes wide with horror as they watched their squad leader vanish into the murky depths of the Abyss. Bubbles let out a cruel laugh and performed a mocking backwards somersault, her shrill voice reverberating around the interrogation chamber like the shriek of a banshee.

"GODDAMNIT! STEVE, HANG ON!" shouted Amanda, and fired a pair of consecutive shots from her grenade launcher directly into Bubbles' bubble. Kevin raised his AK and launched off his own high-explosive round, while Nick began taking potshots at the hovering chu and Kuri scrambled to unleash both of her Pokémon at once. Allie, knowing full well that Trogdor was about as useful against Bubbles as a Sonee's spark was against a human, quickly drew her pistol.

The explosives detonated in a thunderous chorus against Bubbles' shield, sending showers of steaming water flying in all directions. Unexpectedly, the triple blast actually ended up having an effect against the powerful Rosechu, unleashing enough concussive force to hurl her backwards out of the bubble and onto the floor. Before the Honey Badgers could redirect their fire towards her, though, an arc of water rose between the nearest two pools and spread outward, swatting the subsequent barrage of bullets and grenades aside as if they had been mere Airsoft pellets.

"Cover me!" Amanda yelled, and hurled her grenade launcher to Allie, who caught it in surprise. Bubbles charged and conjured a wave beneath her feet, but a trio of quick shots from Nick's rifle forced her to abort the attack. With a vicious yell of rage, Kuri hurled a Poké Ball directly at the oncoming Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, unleashing Aldo directly into Bubbles' face.

"KAW!" cried the Murkrow, and lashed out with a vicious Drill Peck that pierced the bubble and caught the unsuspecting Rosechu on her cheek. A gout of blood spurted into the rippling water, and Bubbles' scream of pain immediately exploded through the Abyss.

"That wasn't nice, you meanie!" screamed the injured chu. "Have some of this! Shocking Surf!"

"NO!" shrieked Kuri as Bubbles conjured two immense sheets of water from her sphere and shot a bolt of lightning into both of them, then slammed them together around the Murkrow before it could fly to safety. Aldo floated and struggled inside the rippling airborne sphere, twitching and spasming as the Rosechu's bioelectric attack zapped him again and again. Just when it seemed as if the Pokémon could take no more, Bubbles released him and let the feathered creature fall to the ground. As Kuri dashed over, screaming in horror, Amanda slid to the edge of the nearest pool and dove right in, throwing her boots to the side first and pulling her jacket over her head.

Kevin looked around in panic. With Kuri frantically attempting to force a Revive pill into Aldo's beak, their small group of operatives had now been cut down to just himself, Nick, and Allie. Desperately sliding his second-to-last 40mm grenade into the Kalashnikov, he fired it at the pool directly below where Bubbles was hovering, in a blind hope to stun or injure the Rosechu. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Steve's distant, blurry figure thrashing around in the huge tank and pounding his fist against the glass as a monstrous shadow drew closer and closer.

WHUMP! The muffled explosion hurled Bubbles out of her shield and into the air again, just as Nick finished reloading his rifle. Centering the scope on the airborne, stunned Rosechu, the Jerkop gritted his teeth and lined up a shot directly at her head. There was no way she could…

"GOO-GEEEEEEEE!"

"AAAAGHHHH!" screamed the sniper as something tiny, heavy, and wet slammed into his leg. Looking down, Kevin was shocked to discover a four-inch-tall Sonee – the same size as the ones in the swarm that had attacked Steve - hanging onto Nick's calf and attacking the sniper over and over again with vicious bites. Further toward the edge of the pool, another two dozen miniature Sonees and Roseys burst out of the water one after the other, their blue and black fur sopping wet and dotted with bioluminescent specks. They had no skirts or sneakers…just slightly flattened, flipper-like armstubs and stumpfeet that let allowed them to slowly and clumsily swim through the pools and glass tunnels beneath the floor of the Abyss.

Oh Arceus, Kevin thought as the puzzle pieces assembled themselves in his head. The fat little fish hadn't been fish at all – they were Sonees and Roseys. Hundreds of tiny Sonees and Roseys.

"AMANDA!" he screamed, and rushed to the edge of the pool, completely forgetting about Bubbles in the process. A jet of compressed water exploded from the Rosechu's sphere and blasted Kevin in the stomach, knocking the wind out of him and sending him sliding backward across the slippery black floor toward one of the open pools full of hungry chu larvae. In the center of the watery battleground, Allie let out a desperate cry as she watched her squadmate tumble over the edge of the pool and into the glowing water. In seconds, Kevin too had vanished.

It had all come down to her and Kuri now. Nick had managed to kick the Sonee off of his leg, and was now fending off the other larval Electric Hedgehog Pokémon with a barrage of vicious swipes from his machete. They were too small and too slippery for him to hit, though, and more of the baby chus were emerging from the pools with each passing second.

Behind them, in the tank, Steve's frantic struggles finally ceased. The last few bubbles of breath trailed from his mouth as the Jerkop's body went limp and began to drift down toward the gravel floor. A low rumbling roar sounded through the cavernous Abyss, and as the two Honey Badgers watched in utter terror, the colossal shadow of "Momma" emerged from the gloom.

The monstrous aquatic creature resembled a Swampert, and Allie was fairly certain it had been at some point in its life. But this beast was nearly the size of a Wailord, with massive webbed hands and feet, an enormous gaping mouth, and a fanlike tail that swept back and forth to propel the leviathan's immense body through the water. Narrowing its malevolent yellow eyes, the giant predator swept forward toward the tank wall and zeroed in on Steve's falling body hungrily.

"Hahahahahahahahaaa…" Bubbles emerged from her watery cocoon, laughing sadistically as she stepped down onto the floor of the Abyss to examine her remaining victims. "Oh, we're having lots of fun today, aren't we?"

"GAAAAHHHHH!" Kevin burst from the water and struggled over the side of the pool, his face scratched and dripping with blood from where the tiny Sonees and Roseys had attacked him. There was no sign of his squadmate, not even a wisp of blood billowing up from the tunnel she'd swam through in her attempt to rescue Steve. But now Amanda was too late, and worse still, she had vanished. If she didn't drown, the miniature chu larvae would devour her like piranhas.

"Kevin!" Allie helped him to his feet, her heart pounding in fear. "Kevin, come on! PLEASE!"

"Sonee!" "Wosey!" "Sey!" "Sonee!" "Gaa-gaa!" "Wosey!" "Goo-goo!" "Nee!" "Goo-goo!"

Coughing up water and clutching the side of his head, Kevin opened his eyes to see a veritable swarm of the tiny blue and black aquatic Sonees and Roseys waddling and wriggling their way toward him and his squadmates. Bubbles knelt down and picked up one of the miniature chus, a Sonee, who squealed in delight and began hugging her fingers with its little armstubs.

The Rosechu giggled wistfully. "They're so adorable when they're small, aren't they?" She tickled the Sonee on its little nose and hummed a soft lullaby as the rest of the swarm advanced on the Honey Badgers. "Most little Sonees and Roseys get so big when they grow up. But not my babies! My babies never grow up. And Blakey-Boo and I just love them this way! Hee hee hee!"

"You…" choked Kevin through a mouthful of salt water. A horrible memory of the feral mother Rosechu with her litter of miniature baby Electric Hedgehog Pokémon flashed through his mind.

"Oh, Magi-Chan loves his little hobbies. So creative," sighed Bubbles. "We did what we had to…for the Combo. And now you all get to play with our pretty babies!" Her voice changed suddenly, and its airheaded, overly cheery tones gave way to chilling malice. "Mommy brought you nice friends, didn't she? Yes she did! Yes she did! It's playtime, little ones! PLAYTIME!"

"YAY!" shrieked the horde of Bubbles and Blake's underdeveloped children as they surged forward in a tripping, squealing tidal wave of blue and black fuzz. "YAY! PWAYTIME! YAY!"

---

CWCville Penitentiary, Sublevel 13, "The Abyss", 2:46 a.m.

Ignoring the fire in her lungs and the immense pain in her head, Amanda kicked and struggled and pushed herself further and further down the luminous tunnel, toward the distant circle of blue light where Steve had been taken. The water around her was pleasantly warm, and if not for the tiny blue-green LED lights set into the walls, her submerged journey might have been nothing less than an agonizingly long swim through total darkness.

The Jerkop knew she was a good enough swimmer. Back in her high school and college days, she had always loved to visit the Olympic-sized pool at CWCville University and just spend entire afternoons doing laps and holding her breath. Had she not been so utterly confident in her ability to rescue her squad leader, Amanda might not have even leapt into the water at all.

But the tube was long, and Steve couldn't hold his breath forever. Then again, neither could she.

Up ahead, Amanda spotted a bubble rolling around on the tunnel's ceiling. Hurriedly swimming over to it, she pressed her lips against the plastic and sucked in the precious oxygen, savoring the momentary relief in her lungs. It would just be enough to get her through the rest of the…

A sharp pain lanced through her left hand. Struggling in shock and surprise, the Jerkop looked down to see a single tiny Rosey, only three inches tall, clinging to her wrist and biting at her thumb with its sharp little teeth. Amanda's sheer astonishment at being attacked by the little blue and black-furred hedgehog larva was quickly eclipsed by a burning surge of absolute rage. Gripping the tiny chu around its bulbous head, she squeezed her hand into a fist.

With a muffled crunch, the baby Electric Hedgehog Pokémon's skull caved in immediately, filling the water with a cloud of blood and pieces of squished brain. Its body went on kicking and thrashing for a few seconds, then spasmed and stiffened in Amanda's hand. A horrific idea flashed through the Jerkop's mind, and for a moment, she nearly vomited from the mere thought of it. But her lungs were burning, and she needed as much oxygen as possible. Sacrifices needed to be made if she had any hope of saving Steve's life.

Grimacing, Amanda pulled the little Rosey's crushed head off and pushed her fingers down its windpipe until she touched what felt like two inflated balloons. Somehow, the baby chu hadn't had time to exhale in death, and she'd clamped its lungs shut, sealing in its air supply. With no time to think about what she was doing, the Jerkop carefully pulled out the Rosey's lungs and brought them to her mouth, then, suppressing her gag reflex, exhaled and breathed in the air trapped inside the two swollen pouches.

Amanda's disgust at the sweet, slimy taste of Electric Hedgehog Pokémon blood was quickly overridden by her sheer joy at this single breath of stale air. With renewed vigor, she continued kicking and kicking, pulling herself further and further down the tunnel until she burst out through the hole into the vast blue tank. Looking around, she noticed that the floor was blanketed in pieces of gravel – an odd feature for Bubbles' personal pool.

Outside, through the tank wall, Amanda could see her companions still fighting the Rosechu. She only hoped they could hold out long enough for her to make use of her improvised exit strategy.

"SWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMM…"

An earsplitting rumble, like that of a colossal whale, reverberated through the tank, and darkness fell across the gravel floor. Looking up, the Jerkop was greeted with a beast straight out of her most horrifying nightmares – a vast shadowed leviathan, its immense leathery body teeming with twisted fins, spines, and glowing dots of bioluminescence like some hideous deep-sea viperfish. Its toothless, turtle-like mouth gaped open wide enough to swallow the Battle Bus, while its massive finned hands, feet, and tail churned through the water, pushing it directly towards…

NO! Amanda screamed silently, her eyes bulging and her teeth clenched in disbelief and as a ragdoll, Steve Morrison drifted down through the water towards her, his sweatshirt and pants billowing out around his lifeless, motionless corpse as he sank deeper and deeper toward the tank floor. As if in a dream, Amanda began to swim up, her eyes locked onto her squad leader's falling body even as the leviathan bellowed again and zeroed in on the pair of Jerkops. Reaching out slowly, the Jerkop wrapped her arms around Steve's chest and began feeling his face and neck, desperately searching for a breath, a movement, anything.

An icy fury built within Amanda's heart as she pressed a hand against Steve's throat and felt the cold, pulseless skin beneath her fingers. There was nothing more that she could do. She'd failed.

"SWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMM…"

Momma's roar went unnoticed by the impassive, broken Jerkop. Amanda knew she only had another half a minute of breath left before drowning would begin, but for some reason, her lungs no longer pained her. The world around her had become a shimmering blur, a hellish void that pressed in on her like a vice, crushing her in its cold, merciless grip. She would die there, alone, swallowed up by some vile abomination with only the body of her dead squadmate for company.

No.

Reaching for the satchel on her belt, Amanda felt her fingers close around the four blocks of C4 she'd taken from the armory. With Steve's body secure beneath her arm, she closed her eyes and began kicking as hard as she could, directly toward the Plexiglas tank wall. Behind her, Momma drew closer and closer like an orca closing in on a seal, her reptilian eyes narrowed in immense concentration as she let out a triumphant roar and opened her jaws to devour this new prey.

Blackness spread across Amanda's vision, starting at the corners of her eyes and working its way in toward the centers. Hugging Steve against her, she pushed a single remote pin into the first C4 block and let all four of the explosives drop to the bottom of the tank. As the colossal marine predator lunged forward to snap up the Jerkops, Amanda grabbed her detonator and flipped open its secondary failsafe switch to blow every single active charge she had planted.

Three…two…one…

CWCville Penitentiary, A Block, control room, 2:49 a.m.

"Goo-goo! Tee hee! Wosey!" the feral Rosey squealed happily as it giggled and waddled around the control room in its little game of hugging everyone's legs again and again. She was so happy that the two big strong EHPF officers in the room had saved her from the big smelly bus and helped make all the owies in her tummy go away! "Goo-goo! Wosey! Hee hee hee! Sey! Sey!"

"The security door's holding," Roy announced, wiping beads of sweat from his forehead and leaning back in his swivel chair. "I just set up another firewall – it should keep those little bastard robots out a little longer until we can lock down the whole system. Eddie, get on the line and find out what the hell's keeping those reinforcements!"

"We're looking at an entire fuckin' riot down in the Atrium level!" shouted another technician as he glanced from screen to screen and scrolled through footage of Devil Trolls and Jerkops attacking and killing the mercenary guards. "They shut down all our comms – I can't get any calls through! Listen to this shit!" He pushed a button, and the room immediately filled with the sound of mischievous laughter.

"Heeheeheehee! DENIED!" squealed a Devil Troll. There was a burst of static, and "Never Gonna Give You Up" blasted out of the speakers at maximum volume. Eddie winced and slammed his hand onto the button again, but the music didn't stop.

"HOLY FUCK!" Roy yelled over the deafening sounds of '80s music and Rick Astley's voice. "TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!"

"I CAN'T! I CAN'T STOP IT!" Eddie's eyes darted from panel to panel as he tried to override the control room's PA system. The other four technicians in the room were desperately typing commands into their consoles, trying to override the cyberattack while the two Sonichu guards clutched their ears and screamed in pain, rendered even more completely useless by the music.

"Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" whined the Rosey, and began tugging on Roy's pants, trying to make him turn off the loud scary sounds. When that attempt failed, she wrapped her little armstubs around his leg and began squirming her way up toward his lap, all the while screeching "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" as loud as she could.

"FOR FUCK'S SAKE, STOP IT!" screamed the technician, and tried to shake off the fat little creature. "GET OFF ME, YOU FUZZY PIECE OF SHIT! GET OFF ME!"

"Woseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey! Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Goo-geeeeeeeee!"

Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

Roy glanced down just in time to see a red light flickering through the Rosey's belly fur. It took him a second to realize what the light meant, but by the time reality struck, it was far too late.

"BOMB! IT'S A FUCKING B-"

Down in the cell block, Al looked up and grinned as an immense fireball engulfed the control room, shattering its massive window, killing every loyalist inside, and instantly deactivating both the outer security doors and every single electronic lock for every single prison cell in A Block.

About fucking time, Amanda, he thought proudly, and kicked the door open.

CWCville Penitentiary, Sublevel 13, "The Abyss", 2:49 a.m.

As Amanda's C4 charges blew in a spectacular chain reaction, the massive wall shattered and gave way, spilling thousands of gallons of water through the Abyss. Grabbing Allie by the arm, Kevin pulled her behind the nearest hydrostasis tank and hugged her close, planting his feet against the floor to brace for the tidal wave. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Nick and Kuri running for cover, while Bubbles could only stare in surprise at the oncoming wall of water.

It was like being hit by a freight train – a wet, unstoppable, merciless liquid freight train. If the Jerkops hadn't been shielded by the immensely strong cell, the initial force of the wave would have knocked them both unconscious in a flash. Dozens upon dozens of the tiny aquatic Sonees and Roseys were caught and swept away before they could even scream, engulfed in the powerful deluge as if they had been ants caught by the stream of a garden hose. Kevin barely had time to draw a terrified breath and stow his AK before the current slammed into him and Allie as well, tearing them away from each other's embrace and plunging them into the watery chaos.

As he spun and twisted in the surging flood, Kevin struggled to kick his way upward, fighting the current while tiny wet blobs struck him in the chest and bounced off one by one. Opening his eyes, he realized that the projectiles were, in fact, little chus being thrown around helplessly by the sheer strength of the flood. Muffled squeals filled the water around him as the swarm of miniature babies frantically paddled and kicked to stay afloat, along with a low roar that he knew could only have come from Momma. Bubbles, meanwhile, had seemingly vanished.

WHUMP!

Something large and heavy slammed into the Jerkop without warning, nearly knocking the last remnants of breath out of his lungs. Kevin nearly suffered a panic attack at the thought of being devoured by the leviathan Swampert, but the object wasn't nearly big enough to be Momma's jaws. Peering through the water with blurry, stinging eyes, he managed to catch a glimpse of blond hair and a flash of white cloth.

Fighting for breath and fueled by desperation, Kevin kicked and kicked upward, his arm wrapped in an iron grip around Steve's lifeless body. The rushing waters were leveling out now, as the massive tank disgorged its contents into the newly-flooded Abyss and the rest of Sublevel 13.

At long last, just when it seemed as if Kevin's lungs would burst, the two Jerkops finally reached the surface, just a few feet away from the upper ledge of one of the six support columns spread out through the interrogation chamber. The blue-green LEDs still shone through the waters below, but now several flashing red emergency lights were spinning overhead as well. From what he could see, the chamber was in lockdown, and even though the flooding had stopped, the Honey Badgers were now trapped inside with Momma, Bubbles, and the Rosechu's brood.

"KEVIN! OVER HERE!"

Kevin looked up to see Kuri kneeling on the ledge, her arm extended towards him. The Jerkop's long brown hair was utterly soaked and she had lost her horned headband, but other than that, Kuri appeared to have been largely unharmed by the deluge.

"Over here!" she called again, her voice choked with anxiety. "Get out of the water!"

"SWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMM…"

Another thunderous roar from the submerged monster echoed around the otherwise soundless chamber as the two Jerkops dragged Steve's waterlogged body up out of the water and onto the ledge. Kevin's hands were trembling so much that he almost couldn't even pull himself out onto solid ground, and his head felt as if it had been run through a few cycles in a washing machine. Dizzy and disoriented, he fell to his hands and knees on the black concrete and immediately coughed up a lungful of water into the churning subterranean pool.

"Come on…come on!" Kuri grunted as she flipped Steve onto his back and started to administer CPR, pushing down on his chest repeatedly with the heels of her hands. "NO! COME ON!"

Kevin couldn't move. His brain was locked in a state of utter paralysis, unable to process what had just happened. It didn't seem possible, but he couldn't ignore the cold reality that lay before him. Gasping and choking, he collapsed to the floor and lay there, drenched and shivering in the darkness while Kuri shakily forced Steve's mouth open and pressed her own against it to begin resuscitation breathing. The blond Jerkop still wasn't moving. Not even a twitch.

A frantic splashing sounded beside him. Through one hazy eye, Kevin watched as Allie and Nick emerged, soaked and coughing, from the deep. He tried to call to them, but the words wouldn't come…only a few drops of water and a single rattling breath. Allie knelt beside him and touched his face briefly, checking for a pulse, then dashed over to where Kuri was trying to revive Steve.

"Where's Amanda? Did anyone see her on the way up?" yelled Nick. "AMANDA! AMANDA!"

"She's here," an alarmingly calm voice answered through the water. "Safe and sound."

Bubbles Rosechu ascended inch by inch from the depths of the flooded Abyss, supported by a gushing column of water and carrying a dozen limp little balls of soaking fluff in her arms. Her yellow eyes narrowed to slits as she stared at the Jerkops, fixing them with a look of pure fury that chilled Kevin to the bone.

"My babies," the Rosechu spoke solemnly, her voice barely above a terrifying whisper. "She did it. She killed our beautiful little babies. What will my sweet Blakey-Boo say when I tell him that…that…" She sobbed and fell to her knees, clutching the drowned baby Sonees and Roseys to her chest. "…THAT SOME JERKOP WHORE KILLED OUR BEAUTIFUL BABIES?"

With a horrendous scream, Bubbles hurled her dead children at the column, pelting the Honey Badgers with a shower of tiny fuzzy bodies. A Sonee smacked the concrete right in front of Kevin's face and slid a few inches, then twitched and began coughing up water with a little "kaf-kaf-kaf" sound. Looking from the lifeless Steve to the stunned baby chu, Kevin closed his eyes in utter defeat. There was nothing more. Kuri's CPR attempts had all failed, and now she'd been reduced to pounding on the squad leader's chest, screaming frantically for the Jerkop to wake up.

And suddenly, a memory surfaced through the fog in Kevin's mind – a memory of some desolate, dark place filled with streaks of blue light and an inexplicable brightness that lay beyond the black. And there was more…a clap of thunder. A sudden jolt. A cold, lifeless hand.

Unconsciously, he reached out and closed his fingers around the little Sonee.

"YOU KILLED MY BABIES, YOU FILTHY NIGGO B-!" shrieked Bubbles, and raised her hand into the air. Amanda exploded out of the deep, gripped from the neck down by a rippling liquid tentacle. At first, Kevin thought the last of his squadmates had drowned as well, but then Amanda let out a hacking cough and spat out a mouthful of water into the Rosechu's face.

"Aww, Mommy's angry," growled the trapped Jerkop as she struggled against the crushing grip of Bubbles' restraint. "Don't worry, slut, you and your Blakey-Boo can always make more."

"I AM NOT A SLUT, YOU SLANDEROUS HOMOS! BLAKEY-BOO AND I ARE A TRUE LOVE COUPLE!" The Rosechu curled her hand into a claw, and the water contracted, squeezing her captive with greater and greater amounts of force. Amanda grimaced and gasped in pain, tensing her body as the pressure pushed down on her chest and torso. Her face was turning blue, and it seemed as if she couldn't hold out for much longer.

Hand over hand, Kevin dragged himself across the ledge toward Steve's body. The Sonee in his fist squealed and writhed, kicking its stumpfeet against his fingers and gnawing at his knuckle hard enough to draw blood. Ignoring the pain in his hand and the baby chu's shrill screams, he drew George's knife with his other hand and flipped the little Sonee around to face him.

"SONEE!" it wailed, wiggling around pathetically to free itself. "GOO-GOO! WAAAAHHHH!"

"ZAP TO THE EXTREME, YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" roared Kevin, and slashed the tip of his hunting knife right through both of the Sonee's cheekspots. Shoving Kuri out of the way as the miniature Electric Hedgehog Pokémon writhed and screeched in pain, he whirled it around, ripped open Steve's shirt to expose the skin above his heart, and slammed the Sonee's mutilated face directly into the Jerkop's bare chest.

ZZZZZAAAAPPPPPP!

"SONEEEEEEEUGHUHGUGHUGHGUHGHH !" shrieked the Sonee as its bioelectric organs overloaded and burst in a single, concentrated surge of energy that instantly caused its own brain to rupture and explode inside its little skull. Kevin ignored the muffled pop and instead worked the spasming baby chu around in a circle, pushing it again and again against Steve's chest to direct the flow into his heart. If he could somehow restart it…

Tha-thump.

Kevin drew back in surprise and let the dead Sonee fall to the floor. It rolled into the water and sank like a stone, trailing blood from its head as Bubbles watched in horrified silence. The shock of watching one of her own babies being used as a living defibrillator had stunned even her. Wasting no time, Kuri bent over Steve's body and began breathing air into his lungs again, clutching his sweatshirt in what seemed like a death grip.

Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

"WAKE UP, STEVE!" screamed Kuri, and punched her squad leader straight in the chest as hard as she possibly could. "WAKE UP, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

"GGGGAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Steve's eye shot open in an instant, and what seemed like a full half-pint of water exploded from his mouth. Shaking and trembling from the direct shock he'd just received, the blond Jerkop rolled over onto his side and immediately threw up another lungful into the waters of the Abyss.

"Madre de Dios," Nick breathed, unable to believe his eyes. "You're back, you blond bastard."

"Yes…" Amanda sobbed, tears rolling down her cheeks as she watched Steve gasp for breath.

Kevin rose to his feet slowly, and drew the dripping AK-47 from the sling on his back. Beside him, Nick raised his sniper rifle, Kuri grabbed her P90, and Allie helped herself to Steve's XM8 again. In seconds, the Honey Badgers had reformed their firing line, albeit smaller than before.

Bubbles merely swept her arm towards the ledge, and a ball of water exploded from the surface of the underground sea. Inside, three dozen tiny Sonees and Roseys – the last survivors of the Rosechu's once-mighty brood – swam and tumbled about in the suspended pool, surfacing every few seconds to breathe.

"You took my babies," the Rosechu sobbed hysterically, and turned her gaze back to Kevin. "Blakey-Boo gave me everything I wanted, and you took it all away." She pointed ahead at them, tears streaming from her eyes. "Let's see how you like it!"

The dripping sphere full of larvae shot across the room and shifted its shape, drawing water from the surface below until the projectile had become a sizeable wave. Helpless and unable to escape, the baby Electric Hedgehog Pokémon could only struggle and squeal as they were borne toward the Honey Badgers – a living tidal wave of destruction.

"SWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMM…"

"SONEEEEE!" "WAAAAAHHH!" "WOSEEEEEEEY!" "GOO-GEEEEEE!" "WAAAAHHH!"

The wave disintegrated in a massive spray of water as Momma's colossal head and neck burst from the depths. Berserk with hunger, the vicious marine predator lunged and snapped at the few miniature Sonees and Roseys who had managed to swim away from the explosion. The leviathan's face dripped with red, remnants of a few dozen dead and dying baby chus who had met their ends in her cavernous mouth and turtle-like beak. Roaring hungrily, she closed her jaws around a struggling Sonee and swallowed it whole, tipping her head back as the little Electric Hedgehog Pokémon let out a piercing shriek.

"Momma…" the Rosechu giggled insanely as she watched her offspring being devoured before her own eyes. "Momma, not now. You can play with the children later, Momma! STOP IT!"

The leviathan glanced towards its adopted daughter and growled again, then resumed its feast. In seconds, the last of Bubbles' spawn had been reduced to a bloody mess of slimy viscera and scraps of fuzz, while the surviving, mortally wounded babies cried and struggled pathetically. Momma merely snapped them up and silenced their screams one by one, then submerged to find more of the drowned Sonees and Roseys to feast on.

"Why?" Bubbles sobbed helplessly. "Momma…why?"

"Cause the entire fuckin' world wants you all dead, bitch," snarled Amanda. "You furry freaks ain't meant to survive. And we're gonna wipe every single one of you off the face of the earth."

"ENOUGH!" The Rosechu's eyes blazed as she levitated on a sheet of water, ascending from the surface while geysers and waterspouts exploded across the Abyss. Her immense anger was churning the entire lake into a frenzy. "ENOUGH! I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU ALL!"

Suspended by her watery cocoon, Amanda gritted her teeth and closed her eyes. She'd done her job and Steve would live to fight another day. But unless Bubbles was removed, all the effort and pain would have been for nothing, and she and her squadmates would die in this watery hell. Maybe she couldn't kill the Rosechu…but she was close enough to do some serious damage.

"THAT'S IT! KILL HER!" roared Kevin, and fired his AK's last grenade directly at Bubbles. This time, though, the Combo member was ready for him. Sweeping her arm up, she redirected a wall of water into the flying explosive, blocking its flight path and encasing it in enough liquid to nullify the subsequent explosion. More bullets from Nick, Kuri, and Allie pounded the watery shield, but none managed to penetrate. In desperation, Kevin switched the Kalashnikov to full-auto and unloaded the entire magazine into the blue Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. But Bubbles still floated there, weeping and screaming for her babies as she effortlessly fended off the assault.

Through the rippling mayhem, Kevin caught a glimpse of Amanda reaching for something on her belt…something like a knife, or her sidearm. Only when the Jerkop wrenched out a tiny pin and hurled the cylindrical object at the back of her captor's head did he realize what it was.

BOOM! The grenade exploded with a thunderous bang, engulfing both Amanda and Bubbles in a blaze of fire and white light. Kevin only just managed to brace himself before the concussive force of the blast knocked him backwards into Allie and sent Nick and Kuri tumbling to the floor. Instantly, the watery constructs collapsed harmlessly back into the Abyss, vanishing without a trace as if they had never existed.

As Kevin pulled himself off of Allie, he noticed a blue shape sinking into the deep in a trail of blood. Momma's immense shadow swept across it, and Bubbles vanished into the monstrous beast's jaws. For a moment, the Jerkop wondered if the mutated Swampert would devour the wounded Rosechu, but his hopes were soon dashed when Momma surfaced back in her tank, gently rocking the blue Electric Hedgehog Pokémon back and forth in her mouth as if she were a baby. The little Sonees and Roseys had been sustainable prey, but Bubbles herself was off limits.

"Anyone…hurt?" panted Allie, and rose, trembling, from the floor. "Kevin?"

"I'm fine." Kevin let out a cough as Nick grabbed his hand and pulled him up. "How's Steve?"

"M'okay…" a weak voice replied. "Nice…to be back."

Kevin looked up to see Kuri cautiously helping Steve to his feet. The squad leader's face was still frighteningly pale, but he was alive, and that was all the Honey Badgers cared about.

"What…the fuck…happened?" asked Steve, shaking his head to clear the water out of his hair and ears. "Actually, don't answer that. Who gave me CPR?"

"That was me," replied Kuri shakily. "Sorry. I think I might've busted a few of your ribs."

"Actually, I don't think you did." The Jerkop touched his chest gingerly. "Yeah, they're all fine. Huh. Okay. So now what? Where's Bubbles?" He looked around. "And…where's Amanda?"

It was as if Kevin's insides had turned to liquid. In the midst of his relief at Steve's recovery, he'd completely forgotten about Amanda. The last he'd seen of his missing squadmate was her throwing the HE grenade at point-blank range, and then…

"OVER HERE!" yelled Nick, his voice laden with panic. "GUYS! I FOUND HER!"

The Jerkops rushed to their squadmate's side, only to be greeted by the heartwrenching sight of Amanda drifting slowly and motionlessly through the water, her face and arms covered in cuts and burns from the massive explosion she'd triggered against Bubbles. Hurriedly leaping into the water, Nick grabbed hold of the woman's arm and pulled her back to the ledge, where Kevin and Allie carefully lifted her out and set her down on her back.

"Oh, Arceus," Kuri breathed, and fell to her knees beside the Jerkop's limp body. "Amanda?"

"Hey…Smurfette…" Amanda whispered, her voice little more than a gasp. "I…got the bitch…"

"Let me see! Where's she hurt?" Steve pushed his way past Nick and Kevin. "Amanda, listen, we need you to tell us where it hurts. You're not bleeding…any internal damage? Come on, Amanda, just…"

"Goddamn…Steve…" chuckled the dying Jerkop. Her hand twitched and rose an inch off the ground, as if she was trying to reach out and touch Steve. "Hey…what's it like?"

A tear rolled down the squad leader's face, and fell to the floor. "Don't you fucking say that. Don't you fucking say that, Amanda. Just tell us what's wrong."

"Ev…everything's all fucked up, Steve…" Amanda spluttered. "I'm just…dammit. Think…my spine's…broken…" She twitched once and squeezed her eyes shut. "Steve…I didn't do this for nothing. Kill 'em. Kill every…single…one of 'em. And take…back…our city…for all of us."

"No," murmured Kuri, as if in a trance. "Amanda, no…"

"Just…shut up…Kuri." Another wave of coughs racked Amanda's body. "You disgust me…but now…now I want you to eat…a whole truckload…of the little bastards. Good…girl…"

The Jerkop nodded, tears dripping down her cheeks. Amanda let out a rattling cough and looked from Kevin to Allie in turn. There were no words that needed to be said – the pride and satisfaction in her eyes was enough for them. Finally, her gaze fell upon Nick.

"Hey," Amanda whispered, and moved her arm a little. "Please…just one more time…"

Wordlessly, the Mexican soldier grabbed her hand and squeezed it, trembling as he clutched the dying Jerkop's fingers. Amanda smiled, closed her beautiful green eyes, and exhaled.

"See you later…compadre…" she finished, and lay still.

It might have been just a few minutes, or as long as several hours, before any of the Honey Badgers moved. No one spoke. Only the muffled sounds of five grieving men and women filled the cavernous room. Kind words could not have eased their pain, and any useless sentimental speeches would have only added to the aura of despair that hung over them. None of the Jerkops truly wanted to believe that Amanda Taylor was dead and gone, but the truth lay before them, just as broken and lifeless as the hundreds of Sonees and Roseys that littered the floor of Abyss.

Kevin hugged Allie more tightly than ever before, his arms shaking with sorrow and helpless defeat. First Jake, then Frank, and now Amanda. It would have been Steve, too, if not for the Jerkop's utter courage and selflessness. She'd followed her squad leader to the edge of death and helped to bring him back, giving her own life in the process to save his. She'd saved the entire squad from certain annihilation, and bought them precious time to escape from the Abyss.

A siren blared overhead, and a mechanical clatter sounded through the room.

"Security breach," the automated PA voice announced. "Floodgates open. Flooding protocols have been overridden by unauthorized users. Hydrostasis tanks released. Please secure the prisoners immediately. Venting excess water buildup in 5…4…3…"

"Into the water," ordered Steve, his face grim as he carefully knelt beside Amanda's body and picked up the dead Jerkop. "It's time to go home." He glanced up. "All of us."

---

CWCville Penitentiary, ground floor, Atrium, 3:07 a.m.

"WHEEEEEE! U mad, bro? Problem? U mad, bro? Heeheeheehee! U mad, bro?"

"I gotta say, these things are starting to grow on me," Al remarked as a flock of Devil Trolls flapped around the atrium, taunting and laughing at the loyalist mercenaries who had surrendered to the overwhelming force of escaped Jerkop prisoners and LIESA units. "SUZI, how did you even find these cute little guys?"

"I dunno…" SUZI pawed at her cloth headspikes cluelessly. "Can we get some ice cream now?"

"Once we get home, SUZI, you can have every single drop of ice cream in the fridge," replied Zoey, and patted the little combat drone on her head. SUZI giggled happily and jetted up to the Jerkop's shoulder, then hugged her head. "I don't even know how you'd eat it, though."

"She mostly just sticks it inside her head," Al explained. "Also, why does she keep going over to you so much? I thought we programmed her to recognize me as her main operator."

"Oh, be nice. Sharing is caring." Zoey held out SUZI towards a group of Devil Trolls and released her into the air to play with the squealing saboteur drones. "And I think it's because I was the first one she ever saw. It must've been her artificial Rosey behavior manifesting – they imprint on whatever they see and form a parasitic bond. Of course, SUZI didn't do that last part."

"What the hell's taking them so long, anyway?" asked Jexis. "They said they'd radio us if anything bad happened? So either nothing's wrong and they're just all lazy, or…"

"Don't say it," Al cautioned her. "Matt, Nate, how's it going?"

"Fine and dandy," Nate replied weakly. His skin had turned several shades lighter from blood loss, while Matt's had returned to a semi-healthy color. "Dibs on anything sweet when we get back. Also, Al, I think I earned a few shots from your private reserve."

"Okay, fine, but don't touch my whiskey." The Manajerk glanced across the atrium, noting the flashing lights outside. "They've been waiting there forever. What the hell's keeping them out?"

"We locked down the entire facility," Mary Lee Walsh replied through a Devil Troll's speakers. "The only way they're getting in is if they can bring in Sonichu or one of the Combo. And seeing as how I had Graduon put up a psychic barricade around the prison, that's not gonna happen anytime soon. It's only temporary, but it'll keep Magi-Chan out long enough to extract you."

DING!

Al, Zoey, Jexis, Serge, Matt, and Nate all looked up simultaneously to see Steve, Kevin, Kuri, Allie, and Nick emerge from the elevator, soaking wet and looking as if they had all just stepped out of hell. Behind them, an assortment of men and women – including Kacey Devoria, Liquid Chris, and a young man with short brown hair and glasses - stood shivering and dripping in the lift, all clothed only in an assortment of towels that the Jerkops had seized from the shower room on Sublevel 3. Al immediately recognized the bespectacled prisoner as Robert Simmons, the legendary PVCC agent who had been captured in the line of duty nearly half a year earlier.

"Arceus," the voice of Walsh gasped as the prisoners stumbled out into the atrium. "What…"

"Bubbles," coughed Kacey, clutching her towel with one hand as she embraced Liquid with the other. "She put us into hydrostasis, Mary, but they…they blew up the Abyss and saved us. They saved all of us."

"Steve!" Zoey yelled in relief, and waved to her squadmate. "Steve, what ha-" Her voice broke as soon as her eyes settled on Amanda's limp body. "Wh…what…"

"It's over," muttered the Jerkop. He didn't even glance up once. "It's over, Zo. She's dead."

Al's knees seemed to buckle, and for a second, Kevin thought he was going to collapse. With his face obscured, the squad commander's expression was almost unreadable, but the sheer shock and disbelief in his stance were more than enough to convey the true emotions that lay behind his welder's mask.

"How?" the Manajerk asked, his voice weak and strained as he approached Steve. "How did it… What…what happened?"

Steve looked up and fixed Al with an icy glare. "You know what happened, Ledger. You know."

"I…wait, what?" The Legend drew back, confused. "Steve, I don't…"

"Shut your fucking mouth," ordered Steve in a calm, terrifyingly quiet tone. "This one's on you, you pig-headed son of a bitch. Come on, Zo. We're done here."

"No, we're not fucking done here!" shouted Al, and wrenched off his mask to reveal a stunned face, twisted by fury and streaked with tears. The Honey Badgers collectively recoiled in shock, even Steve. "What do you mean, 'this one's on me'? Last I heard, you brought her down with you into that hellhole! And where was I? Oh, wait, let me answer that for you! LOCKED IN A FUCKING PRISON CELL!"

Steve's eye narrowed. "We never should have followed Reldnahc to that stupid fucking ambush at that stupid fucking park. You didn't listen to me. You got us all captured. And now Amanda's dead, and it's all because you were too fucking eager to kill Sonichu and take all the glory."

"WHAT?" Al's jaw dropped. "And that makes it my fault that you got her killed?!"

WHAM!

The Legend reeled backwards, clutching his bleeding mouth where Steve had punched him. Grappling viciously for his M1911, he drew the pistol just as the squad leader raised Origin and cocked the hammer back. For a moment, both of the Jerkops stood facing each other, locked in a single stare of absolute hatred.

"How…dare…you…" Steve snarled. "I died down there, Ledger. I drowned, and Amanda was the only one who went after me. We all would've died if it hadn't been for her." He stepped back and stowed the revolver back in its holster. "So don't you ever blame me for getting her killed."

"You…died?" Al sounded distant now, as if something invisible had just shattered inside him.

"We died," the Jerkop corrected the Manajerk. "Because of you."

"BOTH OF YOU, JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!" screamed Zoey, and fired a pistol round into the air. The deafening gunshot resounded through the Atrium, immediately disrupting the conversation between Walsh and the freed Miscreants, alerting every other Jerkop in the vicinity to the Honey Badgers' return, and interrupting the faceoff between Al and Steve.

"Right," continued the Jerkop as all eyes in the room focused on her. "I swear, if either of you ever pulls anything like that again, I'm leaving this squad. I don't even care if you put me in with the fucking BattleAXEs – WE DIDN'T COME THIS FAR TO TEAR OURSELVES APART!"

Steve glanced from Al to Zoey, his face contorted in disbelief. "Zo…"

"Don't." Zoey glared at her squadmate, fixing Steve with her menacing gaze. "Shut up, Steve."

Al drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Without a word, he reached up, flipped his mask down over his face, holstered his pistol, then turned and walked away, toward the armory.

"Fuck it all," swore Steve. He glanced up at the crowd of Jerkops and freed Miscreants who were currently staring at the Honey Badgers with shock. "Show's over. Let's get out of here."

Wordlessly, Kevin helped Nate to his feet while Allie assisted Matt. The long walk to the prison yard passed by in what seemed like a few seconds, and before he knew it, he was helping his brother up the steps of the damaged Battle Bus. Zoey took the wheel once the Jerkops had all seated themselves and Steve had carefully placed Amanda's body in the back of the bus. The Legend was still nowhere in sight, and Kevin had a feeling that they wouldn't be seeing too much of their squad leader over the next few days.

One by one, the captured PVCC pickup trucks, vans, Jeeps, and the Battle Bus started up and pulled away from the massive prison, dispersing through the dark streets of CWCville as police helicopters and EHPF cruisers closed in on them. Like a flock of blue-winged, green-haired birds, the swarm of Devil Trolls poured forth from CWCville Penitentiary and scattered before any of the loyalists could open fire, vanishing into the night with a final shout of "KTHXBAI!"

Kevin watched the city lights pass by, each one burning a new colored streak into his vision as the Battle Bus swerved through the streets on its way back to the safety of Menchi-Nasu. Allie sat beside him with her hand on his shoulder, but he couldn't bring himself to speak to her. In the span of a single, nightmarish day, everything he had fought for had come crashing down around him and his friends. Now Amanda was dead, the perfect cherry on top of the sundae of defeat that the Chaotic Combo, the chus, and the loyalists had just served to the entire PVCC.

There would be debriefings. There would be funerals. There would be disappointment, sorrow, even rage from Walsh and the other administrators. But despite the colossal failures of the June Offensive, Kevin knew that the life he'd known among the resistance was coming to an end, and soon a new, bitter, and more merciless PVCC would rise from the ashes of the old, more righteously-focused organization. The Jerkops had survived the turning point of the war, and even managed to snatch a huge victory – the mass prison break - at the eleventh hour.

For the PVCC and for Kevin himself, there was no turning back. If there had been any hesitation left in his heart, Amanda's death had burned it all away, leaving only a pure, vicious rage behind.

Vengeance would be theirs, even if it claimed every single one of their lives.

---

Northern district, Menchi-Nasu, cafeteria, 6:44 a.m.

Steve paced back and forth in front of the cot that bore Amanda's sheet-covered body, his jaw set and his eye focused on the concrete floor as thoughts and emotions exploded through his mind at the speed of light. The events of the June Offensive kept coming back to him again and again, from the battle on the freeway to the storming of the church to the confrontation with Magi-Chan and everything after. And interspersed through the scenes of chaos and merciless slaughter lay a single inexplicable setting – a world of darkness, surrounded by streaks of blue light, with a lone light shining forth from somewhere far off in the distance.

"Not a tunnel," he muttered to himself, gazing out across the rows of identical corpses covering the cafeteria. He hadn't bothered to count the dead Jerkops, and even after the rest of the Honey Badgers had returned to the barracks for some desperately-needed sleep, Steve remained awake and vigilant over Amanda. Something inside him was forcing him to stay with her, some unspoken promise he had made the moment he realized that she had given her life to save his.

As the minutes passed and sunlight began streaming in through the glass skylights of the cafeteria, Steve continued watching Amanda, ignorant of the PVCC medics and other personnel rushing back and forth around him. The world had become a blurry, murky place, and the bitter emotional chaos deep in the Jerkop's heart continued to fuel his inexhaustible rage, just as it had done from the very moment Christian Weston Chandler's reign had plunged the city into despair.

"Hello, Steve," a calm voice addressed him. "Are you okay?"

Steve glanced up, then turned away with a growl as soon as he recognized the Legend's familiar trench coat and welder's mask. "No. Go away."

"No," the Manajerk replied. "Not until you hear me out."

"I've heard enough already," snapped Steve. "If you want a rematch, then that's fine by me."

"I don't want to fight you, Steve," said Al cautiously. "I never wanted to fight you. You hit me."

"So why'd you let me?" the Jerkop asked, glaring at the Legend. "Because you're getting slow?"

Al was no stranger to death. He'd even believed himself to be numb to the entire concept after so much time in the field with Steve and the rest of his squad. Even the Honey Badgers who had died before Amanda – Jake and Ricky and Caroline and Scott – hadn't drawn more than a few bitter tears from the seasoned Jerkop. But this was something new, something he hadn't believed he would ever be able to feel toward one of the operatives under his command. To him, Amanda was no longer just a mere soldier, no longer just "the one with the explosions". Only when it was too late to correct his mistake did he realize what he had been doing wrong in the first place.

"Because I'm getting old," he answered with a sigh. "And this isn't my war anymore."

Al had always believed that the CWCville uprising could be won through simple military might, cold discipline, and gallons of alcohol. His years serving under Sergeant Matthew Devoria had taught him the ways of combat, of the delicate balance between soldiers and men, and he'd believed that this knowledge and his experience was all he would need to help bring the chu regime to its knees. But that was another time, another war. As the battlefield changed around him, he had failed to adapt, to change with it. And now it was tearing his squad apart.

"I've spoken to Walsh, and she's given me permission," explained Al as his subordinate stared at him with utter astonishment. "I'm resigning, and leaving the squad under your command."

"What?" Steve nearly lost his footing. "No, Al. No. You can't resign. What if they-"

"I'm transferring to the Library HQ in the abandoned zone." The Legend smiled. "The Asperpedia labs are going to be relocated there, and Leary wants me to serve as a consultant on larval extermination techniques. If anything, it'll give me time to finish my book…maybe even try to kick the whole drinking problem while I'm ahead."

Steve nodded. "I get it. You think you can just run away from it all, don't you? No. You're a soldier, Al. You need to stand and fight. I can't lead them on my own."

"Zoey will take your place as primary squad leader," Al continued, ignoring the words of his former lieutenant. "You'll need someone to take her place, too. I know you and Kuri have always been close…and Nick has more expe-"

"No," Steve interrupted him. "Shaw. It's Shaw."

"Kevin? Are you sure?"

The Jerkop nodded. "Absolutely."

Al remained still for a couple of seconds, then spoke again. "What makes you so sure that he's the best one to take Zoey's place?"

"We've all got something to fight for in this war," answered Steve. "Home, family, friends, or just the thrill from watching recolors die. I've got no home. Tanya's probably forgotten about me by now. The only friends I have left are the friends I've fought beside…" He glanced at his boots. "…and against. So there's only one thing left to motivate me. And that, Al, is chaos."

"That's your motivation, though," the Legend sighed. "What about-"

"I'm getting to that, Al," the Jerkop continued. "As you said, you're getting old, but like it or not, this isn't just your war. It's ours. The difference between you and me is that you kill because you were taught to kill. Me? I kill those damn furry babies because it's fun. But I can't lead the squad on a platform of pure chaos. I need a foundation, and Zoey's not enough. She fights for revenge. Kevin, though, he's got his brother, and Matt…and Allie. And that is his motivation, Al. That is what he fights for." Steve exhaled. "Plus, he rigged up a defibrillator using a Sonee and his knife. Without him, I probably wouldn't have woken up."

Al straightened up and tipped his mask back. "Kevin it is, then. I'll let them know before I go."

"So this is goodbye then, Al?" Steve asked. There was no more hostility in his voice, only regret, and a touch of sadness. "You really want to do this?"

"It's not a question of wanting, as much as needing to do this," replied the Legend. "You're ready to lead the Honey Badgers now. Hell, you were always ready to lead them. The other squad commanders and I used to joke about how much of a lazy drunk bum I was, and they suggested that maybe Walsh should make up a new rank for operatives like you…ones who had to shoulder the responsibilities of both Jerkops and Manajerks. We had this little nickname for you, seeing as how you were the one who started off this whole idea."

"…but that's all in the past now, isn't it?" Steve interrupted his old friend, and stepped forward, offering a hand. "Take care of yourself, Al, but just remember…this is still our war. And when the hammer falls on 14 Brunchville Lane, you'll be right there beside us to hear them scream."

The Legend chuckled and accepted the handshake. "Can't wait. See you then, Manajerkop."

---

June 6, 2008, north of Menchi-Nasu, zapbud fields, 7:24 p.m.

"Amanda Taylor," announced Zoey as the Honey Badgers each placed a single tulip one by one into the open steel box that held the sheet-covered body of their fallen comrade. "She came to us out of necessity, to right the wrongs that Chandler forced upon her because of something as trivial as the color of her skin. Through her efforts, we secured the single greatest supply line of explosive materials, construction equipment, concrete, and metal – all of which made it possible for us to fight on, day by day, for the freedom that the loyalists stole from us." She silently nodded to SUZI, who immediately began playing an mp3 of "Adagio for Strings".

As Steve and Serge carried the box down the line of nine Jerkops, Kevin and Allie reached out and added their flowers to Amanda's colorful collection. Prior to the funeral, Zoey had decorated the coffin with a brilliant mix of red and orange flowers, even several black tulips. Amanda now rested in an explosively beautiful bouquet, covered by a plain white sheet upon which each of the Honey Badgers had signed their name. It was hardly the sort of burial that a woman as brave as Amanda deserved, but in the time of war, the Jerkops had to make do with whatever they had.

Kevin found himself thinking back to the day of Jake's funeral, back in 2004. There had been no body then, nothing to bury apart from a single baseball bat. Jake hadn't deserved to die in such a lonely place, in such a horrific way. Amanda, at least, had gone down fighting. She had chosen her fate, acting for the greater good of her squadmates. But somehow, knowing that made Jake's death even worse for Kevin. Even after so many long months had passed since Rift, he still couldn't believe he'd just stood there and watched his friend die. Steve and Al and Zoey had assured him that it was just survivor's guilt, and that Jake's death hadn't been his fault. But since that night, something had started to change in Kevin. He'd realized just how fragile his own life and the lives of his friends were. And now that Amanda had joined Jake and his old hobo friend Frank, that feeling of fragility had only increased.

Allie stood beside him, holding his hand as the procession ended and the heavy coffin was lowered into the trench. For a few seconds, the Jerkops remained in silence, watching as Serge slowly shoveled dirt back into the grave. In due course, the burial was finished – a patch of smooth brown earth in the midst of so much garish pink and blue. Once the war was over and all of the horrid zapbuds were eradicated from the field, Amanda could rest in peace at last.

Finally, after another minute of silence, Steve made his way to the front of the group and turned to face the gathered operatives. The squad leader's face appeared blank and free of emotion, but Kevin knew from experience that it was only a mask to hide Steve's true feelings. He had never seen the Jerkop this way before, and frankly, it disturbed him.

"We're standing at a crossroads." Steve glanced at Al out of the corner of his eye. "According to Al, Walsh's final report says that the PVCC survived the June Offensive with…" Taking a deep breath, he continued on. "…acceptable losses. From a tactical standpoint, a single Jerkop doesn't really amount to much in terms of combat effectiveness. But we don't operate from a tactical standpoint. We know that as a squad, every single member is essential. There are no 'acceptable losses' in this war. But what we need to realize is that these things will happen. And so…Al?"

Al stepped forward. "In light of the events of the June Offensive and my personal shortcomings as a Manajerk…I have chosen to relinquish command of the Honey Badgers to Steve Morrison."

"WHAT?" Zoey's stunned yell echoed across the zapbud fields, startling a few feral Sonees and Roseys playing nearby. "Al, wait a second, you're backing down because of this? We've lost operatives before! What about Ricky and Jake?"

"This is a personal decision, Zoey," the Legend explained with a sad smile. "I don't believe that I'm fit to command this squad anymore. You all know that I've been dealing with my alcoholism for the past ten years…six years…whatever. A really long time. I need some time to get my act together and straighten myself out." He nodded at Zoey. "I believe that Steve is more than ready to take command, and as such, you'll assume the role of squad leader in his place."

Kevin had suspected that something like this would happen, but not on the level of Al actually resigning. Most of the Honey Badgers looked just as surprised as him to hear the announcement.

"Should I appoint a secondary, then?" Zoey glanced back at Nick. "Because I'd like to nomi-"

"Steve's already chosen the secondary," Al interjected, "and I approve of his decision. Kevin?"

The blood in Kevin's veins seemed to freeze, as did the rest of his body and his brain. "Yes?"

Al flashed him a thin smile. "Congratulations." He turned and gazed across the field, sighing wistfully at the sight of so many defenseless Sonees and Roseys playing and cavorting through the flowers. "Ah, Lord knows I'm gonna miss this. Mark my words, this isn't over yet."

"Agreed," replied Steve, ignoring the looks of utter bewilderment that Kevin and Zoey were both currently wearing. "Ready to send her off, Al?"

"Yes. Yes, indeed. Rummaging through the pocket of his trench coat, the Legend withdrew Amanda's detonator. "If you Arceans are right and the afterlife isn't just heaven or hell…" He smiled and pressed the button. "Then at least she'll have some new friends coming her way."

A distant explosion echoed across the zapbud fields. Then another. Then another, and another, and another, in rapid sequence, until the total count reached a full twenty-one blasts. Twenty-one simultaneously detonating Baby Boomers – all of which had been implanted in wild Sonees and Roseys throughout the field. It was nothing short of poetry – the best possible sendoff to the woman who had caused so much destruction to the hated chus via her improvised explosives.

Without another word, Al knelt, placed the detonator on Amanda's grave, and walked away alone, back toward the walls of Menchi-Nasu. The other Honey Badgers watched him go, then turned to Steve. At last, it was done. The torch had passed, and a new Manajerk had arisen.

For a moment, the blond Jerkop looked as though he would have liked nothing more than to turn back time and erase everything that had happened between the present and Amanda's death. In time, though, the regretful expression on his face hardened into one of authority - the expression of a commander, ready and eager to prove his worth on the battlefield.

"Get some sleep, everyone," he spoke at last. "Briefing's at 10:00 a.m. tomorrow. Dismissed."

---

Menchi-Nasu, garage, 9:02 p.m.

Surrounded by an assortment of duffel bags, briefcases, and SUZI, Al sat on the cold concrete floor, sipping at a bottle of Smirnoff once every few minutes. In small doses, the vodka was still able to keep up a steady buzz, while he himself stayed sober enough to actually function. Around him, PVCC technicians were still hard at work repairing the vehicles and Transformers that had been damaged during the June Offensive. The Battle Bus itself now bore a massive hole in the side from where the Javelin had struck, as well as a fair share of bullet holes and scarring. Al hated to see his most prized creation languishing in such a sorry state, and only the alcohol kept him from walking over and doing some repairs of his own.

"Hope Matt takes good care of you, darling," he mumbled through a thick slur.

"Al! AL!"

The Legend turned just in time to see Zoey hurrying across the garage, forcibly pushing her way through the assorted PVCC personnel in her haste to reach him. The Jerkop wore an expression somewhere between frustration and confusion, and Al had a fairly good idea of what she wanted to speak to him about. It could hardly have been a worse time for such a conversation.

"Damn it, I thought you'd already left," Zoey panted, and sat down beside her former Manajerk. SUZI giggled and moved out of the way to let her in. "Al, listen, I seriously need to talk to you."

"You want to try and convince me to stay," answered Al. "Or are you going to start listing off reasons as to why Kevin shouldn't be your secondary?"

"No," snapped the Jerkop. "It's not you. It's not Kevin, I respect that decision. It's Steve."

Al glanced up, surprised. "What about him? I thought you two were best friends."

"I…well, it's not that," Zoey continued. "Al, I think he's losing his mind. You can't leave him in charge in the state he's in – he's still in shock. I mean, he fucking died, Al! I don't know what to tell him, and I'm afraid he's not gonna listen to reason anymore. Not after Amanda."

The Legend sighed. "Have I ever told you what Steve was like when I first met him?"

Zoey shook her head.

"Back in 2001," Al explained, "I was still caught up in all the anger and hatred after Occupation Day. I was the primary squad leader for the HEXterminators – John and Marcus didn't have much in terms of organization in those days. We basically met up three times a week in a warehouse to discuss our plans over a bottle of JD or Smirnoff…the Miscreants weren't as involved with our operations as they are now. In any case, one night, I made a plan to go after this one Rosechu I'd been tracking for a while. I knew she had just hatched a Sonee, and I was going to see if I could take her out and bring back the little shit so we could open it up for fun."

Zoey stared at her former commander interestedly. She had never heard this story before.

"I camped out on the roof of her apartment," continued the Legend. "The next morning, I saw her leaving, so I climbed through the window to see if I could get that Sonee. Just my luck, she took the little furfag with her. So I followed them through the streets, all the way to Upper Central. She goes into this new building that I assume is some sort of daycare center, and just for the hell of it, I just waltz on in after her. She didn't know I was PVCC, and frankly, she didn't care." He smiled. "I go inside, and lo and behold, there's this giant sign, all rainbow-colored and pretty. It said, Laughyland: Where All Babies Are Free To Hug And Play…NO HOMOS!"

"Laughyland…" breathed Zoey. "I thought…wait, so that…that was all real?"

"Yep," chuckled Al. "I get in, and these two guards stop me. Of course they let the Rosechu in, no problem. I said I was lost, and asked what the place was. They told me the place used to be a pet store, but after Occupation Day, Chandler had it converted into a nursery for the chus to store their Sonees and Roseys while they were out zapping or shopping or fucking or whatever. And just like that, something clicked inside my head. I waited until the Rosechu had dropped off her Sonee, and then struck up a conversation with the guards. They hated their job, they hated the chus, they hated Chandler, and they hated having to protect the retarded little maggots day after day. It was only a matter of letting them know about the PVCC. After that, they were more than eager to join up with the resistance. They were both Hispanic, and cousins, you see. One of them was Joshua Martinez, and the other was-"

"Nick…" Zoey's mouth dropped open slightly. "Holy mother of fuck."

"I know, right? Funny how stuff sometimes just works out better than you think it would."

"So what happened then?"

Al took another swig of vodka. "Well, since Josh and Nick didn't want anything more to do with Laughyland, they all but handed me the keys then and there. I went in. The sight that greeted me brought tears to my eyes. There were Sonees and Roseys everywhere - countless numbers of them, frolicking and playing all over the brightly colored nursery. Some were playing hide and seek, laughing with glee as they waddled around looking for a place to hide. Some were eating snacks over at a table. Some were playing with toys, clapping their little armstubs together at the fun that they were having. Some were watching Mary Poppins on the television screen, the colors and sounds making them stare up in awe. Some waddled around, giving each other hugs and kisses, just to make their little friends squeal in delight. The youngest of them were just simply looking around, making curious baby noises as they examined the bright colors. It was truly a paradise for the little infants. Just waddling and playing, laughing and eating, hugging each other while they embraced the fun-loving atmosphere."

The Legend smiled widely…very widely. "I knew then that this was my place, my time. This is what I was destined to do. This was truly a heaven meant for me."

"And you killed them. You killed them all by yourself," Zoey finished, awestruck.

"Not by myself, no," Al corrected her. "I had some help from a pair of Dobermans I found caged in the back. By the time I was through with them, only four were left – a Sonee who had part of his head crushed in, a Rosey that I stitched a Sonee's skin onto, another Rosey with no limbs, eyes, or tongue, and finally, that first Sonee, the one whose mother I'd been following in the first place. Him, I kept alive. I named him my Vice-Chairman of the Sonee's Democratic-Republic of Laughyland…it's a long story. In any case, Nick and Josh were witnesses, and soon enough, the PVCC claimed responsibility for what I did to the babies in that nursery. And before you know it, everyone's calling me the Legend." Al swished around the vodka in his bottle. "The Alcoholic Legend, more like. This whole drinking problem started after Desert Storm, you know."

"How does this have anything to do with Steve, though?"

"Well, it was Laughyland that inspired him to join up with us, really," said Al. "He was working for an underground political journal called the Miscreant, and he was the first reporter on the scene after Walsh tipped off the paper's chief editor, Vivian Gee. That turned out to be a mistake, since Steve was already on the blacklist for some articles he'd written about Chandler. He got put under house arrest, and seeing as how I'd already helped the Martinezes into our little organization, I figured that this kid deserved a shot at working with a gun instead of a laptop. I went to Jason Kendrick Howell, and we put together a little team of homewreckers to bust him out. You should've seen it – we had this Humvee with a battering ram on the front…"

Al paused. "Sorry, I'm getting all nostalgic now. Anyway, Steve joins up, Vivian starts working with Walsh as an intelligence officer, and the group of administrators becomes the Miscreants. Point is, I went out of my way to rescue Steve, not because I thought he earned a second chance, but because after Laughyland, I needed to find someone who was as enthusiastic about killing Sonees and Roseys as I was. I needed someone who flat-out despised these little shits, someone who wanted to see them all wiped off the face of the earth. You see? I made Steve Morrison."

Zoey narrowed her eyes. "Back then, not many people were paying attention to Sonees and Roseys, were they? They didn't know about the feral swarms, or how fast the chus bred?"

"Nope," replied Al. "And because of Laughyland, everyone in CWCville finally got to see the little shits for what they are – spoiled, pathetic, and lacking any sort of empathy whatsoever. And as the weeks and months passed, I taught Steve to channel his rage into energy, in the hope that one day, he'd take my place as squad leader. Both John and Marcus were KIA in late 2001, and I took over as commander of the new Honey Badgers squad. Now Steve was looking up to me as a mentor, and there wasn't much else I could do. We had many adventures together, him and I…"

The former Manajerk's voice trailed off, and for a moment, Zoey thought he had simply passed out from the vodka. Before she could say anything, though, Al spoke up suddenly.

"Zoey…is the reason you're asking me about Steve…is it because you're in love with him?"

The Jerkop stiffened in alarm. "What?"

"You've always been his friend, Zoey," the Legend continued. "I know you two are close. And now he's going to need you more than ever. Steve is unstable. He needs someone to tell him when he's gone too far." He stared at her through the visor of his mask. "Can you do that?"

The squad leader remained silent, nervously biting her lip. At the far end of the garage, the outer doors slid open with a mechanical rumble, revealing two Punislavs approaching from the gate.

"He's my friend, Al," she answered at last. "I'm not in love with him. I might've been, at one point, but I'm not so naïve anymore. Kevin and Allie… I know they're good for each other. Jexis and Matt look like they're going the same way, too. Amanda and Nick might've even had time to grow their relationship if…" She sighed. "Damn it, Al, it's all fucked up now."

Al didn't reply. Finally, he picked up SUZI and handed the little combat drone to Zoey. "Here."

"Wait, what?" The Jerkop stared in disbelief as SUZI hopped into her lap and delivered a firm hug to her waist. "Al, what are you doing? She was assigned to you."

"What am I gonna use her for at the Library?" the Legend replied. "She's better off here, with all of you." He rose and began assembling the bags as the Punislavs pulled up. "Looks like my ride's here. SUZI, you're gonna stay with Mommy now. I'll come and visit you soon, okay?"

"OhhhhhkaaaaAAAAaaayyy…" sighed the LIESA unit, and waddled over to Al's leg. "I got lots of new friends to play with until then, anyway!" Leaning forward, she wrapped her hydraulic armstubs around his ankle and hugged it. "Thank you for having me to help you. I had fun. I…"

Al groaned. "SUZI, please don't say it."

"…love yooOOoouuu," finished SUZI. A digital tear formed in her eye-screen. "Bye-bye!"

"Bye-bye, SUZI," Al replied warmly, and turned to Zoey. "Take care of her. If you could…" He leaned toward the squad leader's ear and whispered something, then nodded. "Don't tell her."

"Deal," chuckled Zoey. "You're something else, Al. I'm gonna miss you. Have fun at Asperpedia." She stood up. "Come on, SUZI. Let's go find you some Devil Trolls to play with."

"YAAAY!" squealed the robotic Rosey, and hovered up by Zoey's shoulder. "DEVIL TROLLS!"

Al watched the Jerkop and her new sidekick walk back across the garage for a few more seconds, then turned and headed for the waiting Punislav. It was time to say goodbye to Menchi-Nasu and his old comrades at last. It wasn't the end – just the start of a new cycle for the Legend. He couldn't wait to see what the Asperpedia Labs had in store for him.

And as for the Honey Badgers, there was no need to worry. Al was fairly certain that Steve had planned out a few interesting assignments to keep them busy until the next offensive began.

---

July 12th, 2008, Menchi-Nasu, Honey Badger barracks, 10:24 a.m.

"Minnesota?" Kevin asked incredulously, staring up at Steve and Zoey as the other Honey Badgers crowded around to listen to the announcement. "Why the hell would Leary relocate them to Minnesota? We need the Asperchus here!"

"It's not a complete relocation," Steve explained, handing him a sheet of paper. "Silvana only teleported Alec and the chus over to the Minnesota compound. Evan and Mao say that it's part of their rehabilitation and training program. They brought five feral Roseys for the next stage of Project Asperchu as well. Alec wants a stress-free environment – he thinks it'll decrease the possibility of total reversions like the one that happened to Blake."

"That traitor," growled Kuri under her breath. "We should've killed Bubbles while she was still out cold. Now there's probably a hundred more piranha-chus swimming around in the Abyss."

"Regardless of Alec's decision…" continued the Manajerk, ignoring Kuri's comment, "…Al is going to continue working at the Asperpedia Labs in the abandoned zone. He's been conducting some rather…interesting experiments on the specimens down there. Apparently there's this type of fungus called Cordyceps that infests the brains of insects, and he's trying to breed a new strain that only attacks baby Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. So far, it's not going too well."

"At least he's keeping himself busy," remarked Nick. "We haven't been out on assignment since the 8th. What happened to our whole 'all-out war' plan?"

Steve adjusted his eye patch. "Operating outside Walsh's knowledge isn't nearly as simple as I thought it was gonna be. Arceus, that little distraction Al pulled back in April to get Simonchu out to help us…that was brilliant. Maybe that's why the admins keep watching us so closely. In any case, they still want us lying low until the fallout from the June Offensive blows over."

Nick blinked. "So…when are we going out?"

"Tonight," answered Steve with a smile. "Mypoe wants to visit an old acquaintance, and I'm not about to pass up the chance to help knock off a Combo member. We're going after Punchy."

"Hold on, hold on." Kevin looked around the room. "I don't even…what kind of stuff would we be up against? How does this normally go?"

"Well, first off, you should already be familiar with the territory," Zoey explained. "Punchy's been running a whole drug operation out of Soup Hotel #4 after the city shut it down, and the rest of the Combo doesn't even know about it. Layla and Reginald are both in on it, so we might get an opportunity to put them down as well. - I'm still not clear on the details. In any case, we'll go over the assignment with Mypoe this evening, and she's even agreed to give you all a little tutorial in martial arts."

"We'll need someone back here to stay in touch with the administration if anything goes wrong," the Manajerk continued. "Sorry Nate, you're up."

"Aw, damn it," muttered the sniper. "Looks like you'll be shooting alone out there, muchacho."

"Oh, what a cruel fate it is to be freed from constant interruptions," Nick chuckled sarcastically. "Just kidding, amigo. I'll let you know if I manage to pull off any really good shots."

Kevin nodded slowly. "Soup Hotel #4 again, huh? Okay, sounds like a plan. Are we going in separate squads, or…"

"No, we'll just go as a single unit," answered Steve. "This is big. Heavy enemy concentration, lots of mercs, lots of chus. Load up for some intense shootouts. Serge, I'm looking at you."

"Is not problem," the large Russian man grunted. "Intense only mean more killing for Serge."

"Okay, then. Any questions?" Steve waited a few seconds before concluding his announcement. "Good. I'll see you all tonight. Zo, Kevin, we'll go over the plan in about an hour. Dismissed."

---

July 13th, 2008, central CWCville, Slum district, Soup Hotel #4, 2:31 a.m.

"What the hell happened up there?" Allie asked worriedly as she, Kevin, and Matt herded their group of shivering children through the loading bay in the back of Soup Hotel #4 towards the five PVCC vans waiting to take the former laborers to Slumberland. Up ahead of them, both Steve and Zoey were conversing with Vivian Gee over the radio, making their final report and attempting to explain why they had violated protocol for the dangerous assignment, while the rest of the Honey Badgers and some additional Jerkops from Slumberland helped the kids into the vans and buckled them in. Many of the little boys and girls were crying openly and hugging their rescuers, overcome with relief that they no longer had to labor in Punchy Sonichu's cartel.

Kevin picked up a young red-haired girl and placed her into the back of a van. "We breached the fourth floor and found them all working in some sort of drug lab. There weren't any mercs up there, only a chu overseers. Mypoe took out the Sparky and said she was going after Reginald."

"And you let her go in there alone?" Matt shook his head in bewilderment. "What the hell was Steve thinking? That's Reginald fucking Sneasel! For all we know, he might've killed her and-"

"He's dead."

Kevin turned to see Mypoe approaching from the abandoned cafeteria. The blonde martial artist's clothing was spattered with blood, as was the silver baton clutched in her hand. Her face was now marred by several razor-like talon marks, and she was clutching a bloody wound on her chest, but other than these injuries, she looked to be in relatively decent shape.

"Reginald's dead," she announced, spitting out a mouthful of blood onto the asphalt. She held up a set of four bloody claws and a red bandana that had once belonged to the Sneasel and handed them to Kevin. "We need to get the kids out of here, now. Punchy knows we hit the Soup Hotel."

"Hold on, hold on. She's here." Steve pushed his way through the group of children and Jerkops, a look of stunned anticipation on his face. He held out the walkie-talkie. "Okay. Say that again."

Mypoe closed her eyes and sighed. "It's done. I killed him. Reginald Sneasel's dead."

There was a sharp intake of breath from the radio. "Morrison, can you confirm the kill?"

"Kill confirmed," Steve replied as Kevin handed him the claws and bandana. "We're bringing back a few souvenirs for Commander Walsh. Better wake her up – she's gonna want to see this."

"Guys," Kevin spoke softly, scarcely able to believe what his squad had just pulled off. "Guys, do you realize what we just did? We helped kill one of Chandler's elite. We just made history."

"Damn straight we did," chuckled Kuri, and wiped her tekko-kagi on her jeans. "So now what?"

Zoey smiled. "Well, we're not getting any sleep tonight now. Steve can handle the paperwork, so I'm thinking…"

---

North CWCville, Red Light district, the Scarlet Sanctum club, 3:22 a.m.

"CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!" shouted Jexis, Matt, Nate, Nick, Kevin, and Kuri in unison as Serge and Zoey each grabbed a third beer stein and clinked them together, then tipped them up and began gulping down the frothy amber drinks. Raucous cheers echoed through the entire bar from the packed crowd of Jerkops and civilians, all of whom were eagerly betting on which of the Honey Badgers would last the longest. So far, it was looking like Serge.

Before Occupation Day, the Scarlet Sanctum had been one of the largest and most prominent multi-gender brothels in CWCville, boasting an immense staff of male and female "workers" who catered to some of the wealthiest members of CWCville's elite. In the wake of the citywide ban on homosexuality and the mass shutdown of the Red Light district, though, the fear of EHPF intervention had forced the Sanctum's managers to seek out a slightly less illegal line of work – smuggling and distributing alcoholic beverages. A lot of alcoholic beverages.

It was Kevin's first encounter with such an upscale black market establishment, and so far, he was having the time of his life. The Honey Badgers didn't receive many opportunities for recreational activities like Spring Break, but when they did, they certainly made the most of it.

"Well, we fucking did it, little bro," Nate mumbled, leaning against Kevin's shoulder in a half-conscious stupor. "No more Reggie. And we…we were there when all this shit went down…"

"Goddamn right, buddy," Matt laughed, and reached for his beer glass. He missed by several inches. "Son of a bitch, everything's moving all over the place. Kevin, I swear…if you let me eat another raw Rosey like what happened back in March, I'm gonna…"

"Dontcha worry, big boy," purred Jexis from the stool next to him. "I gotcha covered…" Her eyes were completely unfocused. To say she couldn't hold her liquor was an understatement – the medic was only eighteen and a lightweight by every definition. Two shots of tequila had plunged her into what could only be described as alcohol-fueled hypnosis.

A chorus of disappointed groans swept through the room as Serge let out a colossal burp and promptly collapsed forward onto the bar, snoring peacefully. Kevin, frankly, was stunned. The Russian's size alone would have normally been a red flag for any challengers. Then again, Serge had downed about eight vodka shots over the last half an hour, prior to starting the contest.

"You an' me now, muthafucker!" slurred Zoey, pointing at a mustached, long-haired Jerkop in the crowd. "C'mon! I just took out the Big Bear, Grandpa! Who's your squad, huh? I'll tell you who! THE SQUAD THAT DIDN'T TAKE OUT REGINALD SNEASEL, THAT'S WHAT!"

Gritting his teeth, the PVCC operative coolly withdrew the cigarette from his mouth and placed it in the ashtray on the counter. "Honey Badgers, right? I've heard of you guys on R-PAT a while back. What's all this bullshit about taking out Reginald Sneasel, huh?"

"He's dead," Kuri explained, and downed another mouthful of her cocktail. It was a custom mix to "honor" the dead recolor – blue curaçao liqueur with milk, coconut shavings for claws, and a slice of lemon for Reginald's large yellow ear. "We just got back from the op that killed him."

"Goddamn," growled the man. "One more furfag bites the dust. That girl there…she with you?" He pointed to Zoey, who by now had forgotten he was even there and was attempting to insult every single member of the crowd in turn. Amazingly, not one of them had punched her out yet.

Kevin turned around in his seat and grinned. "Yeah. That's our squad leader, Zoey." He held out a hand. "Kevin Shaw, secondary squad leader, Honey Badgers, Menchi-Nasu. This is Kuri."

"Harvey Adams, Sea Lions, ChinaTown," the Jerkop replied. "Call me Smoker. And lemme buy you all a drink. But if I turn on R-PAT tomorrow and find out you lied about that Sneasel…"

"WOO! Free booze! Bring 'em on!" yelled Jexis, who was now blind drunk after just two shots.

"No more for her, please," Kuri laughed. "And don't worry about Reginald. Not even Chandler can bring him back now." She sipped at her glass and stuck out her tongue, which had turned a rather interesting shade of blue. "Kevin, where'd Allie go?"

"Bathroom, I think," replied Kevin. He glanced at the clock. "Ten minutes ago. Why?"

Rolling her eyes, Kuri turned back to her cocktail. It took a couple of seconds for Kevin to piece together the incredibly obvious subtext of what had just happened. "Oh, fuck. Smoker, I'm gonna take that free round ASAP."

"Lady friend of yours?" the Sea Lion chuckled, and waved to the bartender. "Hey, over here. Yeah. Get the kid a Chandler's Third Date. I'm buying."

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," groaned Kevin, and finished his beer in a single gulp. "What the hell's a Chandler's Third Date?"

"Special edition of a Long Island Iced Tea," explained Adams. He glanced at Kuri briefly, then looked back to Kevin. "Trust me, kid, you're gonna thank me later."

"I bet." Kevin glanced down to see his fingers shaking, and instantly gripped the edge of the bar to make them stop. The bartender placed a highball glass of orange liquid with a slice of lemon in front of him, complete with a straw. "Fuck it all. Here we go." Grabbing the glass, he took a long drink, staggered to his feet…and promptly passed out on the floor.

Kuri blinked. "That was a Chandler's Third Date?"

"He'll thank me later," Adams repeated, and took a sip from his own bottle of beer. "So will you. We're at war, lady. You gotta keep your team from getting too lovey-dovey, or else the entire fuckin' organization falls to pieces. I've seen it happen. Not pretty."

"So you just…cockblocked him?" The Jerkop leaned down and pulled the unconscious Kevin back up into his bar stool. She sniffed the glass of liquor. "Wait a sec, what the hell was in that?"

"Half a tablespoon of CWC Orange Soda and a few roofies," replied the Sea Lion matter-of-factly. "There's a reason it's called a Chandler's Third Date, missy."

"Hey guys." Allie pushed her way through the crowd and reclaimed her seat on the other side of Kuri. "Sorry that took so long – it was fucking packed in there." She glanced at Kevin, who was now peacefully snoring with his head pressed to the countertop. "Wait, what the hell happened?"

"Uh…nothing. Know what, Smoker, I'm gonna take that free round too," Kuri stated hurriedly.

---

August 8, 2008, north CWCville, Northern district, Menchi-Nasu HQ, 6:10 a.m.

"Kevin? Hey, Kevin?"

"Mmmmfffffwazzup?" Kevin mumbled, still clinging onto his pillow and trying desperately to get another few seconds of sleep. Outside, the sun was just barely coming up over the eastern part of the city, shedding a faint orange glow over most of CWCville. Squinting against the glare, Kevin finally rolled over and blinked a few times. "Zoey?"

"Hey," the squad leader addressed him apologetically. "Sorry to wake you up so early, but I can't find SUZI anywhere. Any idea where she wandered off to?"

"Nope, sorry." Kevin lay back down and shifted around in his cot. "She's probably just playing with the Devil Trolls again. Leave me alone. I feel like shit. My arm's still swollen." He unconsciously rubbed the bandaged wound on his forearm where a skirtachuting feral Rosey had static-clung its way onto him and delivered a painful bite with its little sharp teeth. Needless to say, the Honey Badgers had had a rather delightful time feeding the baby chu to Sugar, one limb after the other, while Jexis sprinkled some salt into each new open wound.

"Okay." Zoey sighed. "I just hope she didn't go and get lost somewhere in the air ducts."

"Mmmmmmmmffffff. Leemee 'lone."

"Sorry. I'm gonna hit the shower early and go look for her some more. I'll be back for briefing."

Kevin closed his eyes and tried to ignore the pain in his arm. Jexis had cleaned the wound and given him enough antibiotics to keep sepsis from taking effect, but it still hurt like hell whenever he touched it, like a large cyst or boil. At least it wasn't as bad as the infection Steve had suffered out in the jungle. That one had nearly killed the Manajerk.

Regardless of his injury, Kevin was soon fast asleep again. The alarm was set for 8:30, and he intended to get as much rest as he could to get rid of the infection. The last thing he needed was for a single Rosey bite to put him out of commission.

---

Four hours later, Honey Badger barracks, 10:00 a.m.

"…and if any of you see her, let me know ASAP," Zoey finished, and retreated back to her seat on the sofa next to Kuri and Kevin. "I mean, you all know how valuable SUZI is."

"Indeed," Steve replied, stroking his mustache as if pondering something. "Well, thanks for telling us, Zo. Now then, today's announcements. We've actually got a bit of an important assignment coming up tomorrow – running recon for a Devil Troll info strike on…uh…" He hurriedly ruffled through a sheaf of papers. "Here we go. Trident. No, Tripod. It's a data storage facility in Lower West, about three blocks from AnneWeston Elementary. Unfortunately, we can't hit the school afterwards. Too many civilian kids and EHPF there."

Kevin shuddered. He still hadn't forgotten that little girl in the Feeding Day pile. Suddenly the idea of hitting AnneWeston Elementary – a place literally brimming with defenseless homebreds - seemed a lot less appealing if the human children were being guarded by Sonichu officers.

"In any case, Tripod." Steve passed out a stack of manila folders filled with schematics and floor plans of the building in question. "This could very well end up being the single biggest strike against the chu population and the loyalists since Mypoe killed Reginald. For the most part, we won't be doing anything in terms of combat, sadly. If anything, Nick and Nate, you'll get the most action. This is going to be a quick operation – we set up on top of the office building south of Tripod, you two take out any merc security inside, and then it's just a matter of waiting for the Devil Trolls to get in and start wreaking havoc on everything."

Kuri grinned. "Sounds good. Anything with Devil Trolls…color me excited."

"I swear, your obsession with them kind of disturbs me," the Manajerk commented. "In a good way. Actually, that doesn't make sense. Forget it. Anyway, it's a simple mission: low risk, high profit, home in time for dinner. Sound good to everyone?"

The Honey Badgers nodded and murmured their assent. Satisfied, Steve turned and headed for the door, doing his best to stifle a huge grin.

"Okay, hold it right there, Steve!" Zoey rose to her feet, an annoyed scowl on her face. "Get back here! You're hiding something. What the hell did you do with SUZI?"

"I did nothing, Zo," the blond Jerkop insisted, not even trying to conceal his smile anymore. "I just…well, I think you ought to see for yourself." He raised an arm above his head and knocked twice on the ceiling. "Okay, SUZI, come on out!"

"YAY! WHEEEEE!" SUZI popped out of an open vent and hovered over to Zoey, who grabbed the little combat drone and hugged her in relief. Kevin could swear there was something a little different about the robotic Rosey…something he couldn't quite put his finger on. For the most part, SUZI looked just like a normal LIESA unit, but there seemed to be something on her back, something that resembled a little metal backpack or jetpack or…

"SUZI," continued Steve. "Show Mommy your new gear."

The LIESA giggled and activated her skirt repulsor, jetting out of Zoey's hands and into the air where all of the Honey Badgers could see her. A rasping shriek of metal on metal sounded from the little robot, and as Kevin watched, a pair of what looked like steel bat wings unfolded from her back. The edges of said wings were bladed, and appeared to be motorized as well, providing SUZI with greater stability and flight control in midair. To top off the transformation, two radio antennae sprouted from the tips of her ears, and a little USB cord dropped down from the bottom of the "backpack".

"No," breathed Zoey as Steve beckoned to SUZI and held out a little green, blue, and tan costume. "No, you didn't. YOU DIDN'T."

"Friends, Jerkops, countrymen," announced the Manajerk, pulling the cloth layer over each of the LIESA unit's extremities. "I give you…Devil Troll SUZI."

"Heeheehee!" squealed SUZI, and did an enthusiastic loop in midair. "I got HAAAAAAX powers now! The nice Satan lady and the PINGAS guy gave me all these toys of FUUuuuUN…that KILL THINGS! Wanna see? I can has target practice? PLZ? PLZ? PLeeeEEEEEEeeEASE?"

"No," Steve said bluntly. "No laz0rs in my barracks. You want to fire them, you go outside."

SUZI made a little pfffttt noise and crossed her stubs. "Doesn't matter, I got TROLLIN' powers."

"So…we're sending her in with the other Devil Trolls?" asked Zoey tentatively. "Steve, I don't know about this. What if something happens to her? I mean, you saw how easily they go down-"

"Please." Steve rolled his eyes. "We'll have taken out more than enough of the merc guards by then. It's gonna be a walk in the park. Worst case scenario, some overpowered chu just comes out of nowhere and just kills every single Devil Troll all at once. And that's about as likely to happen as Chandler getting out of the Time Void tomorrow."

---

August 9, 2008, west CWCville, Lower West district, Terrah Nova apartments, 12:50 p.m.

"Good breach, good breach," Zoey announced as Kevin and Matt quickly dispatched the surprised Sonichu and Rosechu with a pair of silenced headshots from their Beretta pistols. "Clear. Nate, Nick, get in here. Set up in the windows, we'll take care of the babies." Scanning the apartment briefly, she knelt beside the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon couple and checked their pulses, then rose to her feet and nodded to the two Jerkop snipers who had just entered the room.

"Quick and quiet. I like it," commented Matt. "How's it look from there?"

"We've got a great view of most of the southern side," Nick replied, and set his backpack by the first window. "It's not gonna be too windy today, but watch the flags in case it picks up, Nate."

"Got it." Nate propped his rifle against the second window and began screwing on a silencer.

"Okay, we're good," said Zoey, and gave Kevin and Matt a thumbs-up. "Go find the rest and put 'em down. If we're lucky, the little shits'll be asleep, but you don't need to worry about sound."

Kevin nodded. Terrah Nova was a primarily chu-occupied apartment building, and as such, the owners had been forced to soundproof the walls to dampen the shrill cries of the homebred baby Electric Hedgehog Pokémon that now resided within the skyscraper. They had been installed as safety measures to keep the larvae from annoying other chu families, but now, their only purpose was to mask the Honey Badgers' presence while Nick and Nate carried out their support mission for SUZI and the other Devil Trolls. The Tripod facility sat a block away, disguised as a large unprotected warehouse. But from what the Jerkops had read in their briefing, it was anything but.

"We've got loyalists," Nick reported, peering down into Tripod through the scope of his rifle. "Yeah, I see them. Looks like they've only got about four guards on this side…that would make it…about three squads total. It's not gonna be easy, but they should have enough time to sneak in once we take down the outer guards. Let's just hope they didn't post any counter-snipers."

"Pick your targets and wait for clearance," instructed Zoey. "Kevin, Matt, hurry up."

"Right." Matt checked his Beretta and crept to the nearby doorway. Reaching out, he grabbed the knob and turned it quietly, then pushed it open to reveal a king-sized bed. "Clear. This must've been their bedroom." He pointed to the dead lovehogs. "Kevin, you can take the next one."

Cautiously and quietly, Kevin moved down the hallway to the next door and repeated Matt's silent entry. A teenage Rosechu sat on her bed facing the wall, chattering endlessly into a horribly-decorated pink cell phone.

"Uh huh. Yeah, like, I am, like, so excited about the school dance tonight, like, Mom just bought me this totally awesome new dress and Cheri is, like, so jealous because she can't, like, go because, like, she's still a Rosey and that is totally not cool with the-"

Kevin rolled his eyes, raised the silenced pistol, and shot her in the back of the head, smashing the cell phone into a shower of bloody pink plastic pieces and killing the Rosechu instantly. There would be no school dance for her, and certainly no future opportunities for her to spawn any chu babies. The Jerkop quickly scanned the room, then closed the door and followed Matt to the last one. The apartment held at least one Rosey, they knew that for sure.

"Menchi-Nasu to Honey Badgers, Infobomb is a go," announced Joseph Herring over the radio. "I say again, Infobomb is in effect. Sharpshooters are now clear to engage. Open fire!"

"Take 'em out," Zoey ordered from back in the living room. Kevin heard four suppressed rifle shots ring out in rapid succession, and smiled as the squad leader reported four targets down. Spurred on by the good news, he made his way up to the final door and opened it, revealing…

"Heh. Jackpot," Matt chuckled as he stepped through the doorway and surveyed a large room filled with toys, games, candy wrappers, two beds, and a crib. Snoring peacefully in the beds, a Sonee and a Rosey lay fast asleep with big happy harelip smiles on their fuzzy faces. The crib held another chu larva – a tiny five-inch Sonee that looked as if it had only hatched a week ago.

Kevin grinned and pointed to the crib. "Dibs."

---

2 miles above the Tripod Filing Facility, 12:52 p.m.

Flapping her wings like a little bat made of cloth and circuitry, SUZI whirled through the air and squealed happily as her blue eye-screens flickered with static. The high altitude was affecting her sensors, but the thin chilly air and direct sun exposure was better for her cooling system and the solar cells built into her wings, giving the hyperactive LIESA an extra energy boost. Around her, the other Devil Trolls were acting in a similar manner, giggling and playing with each other while they waited for the final attack order to be broadcast from Menchi-Nasu.

"HI THERE!" SUZI glided over to a group of cavorting Devil Trolls and waved gleefully.

"ERMAHGERD!" one of the female LIESAs replied, and waved back. "ME GUSTA!" The other Devil Trolls looked up and exclaimed their own greetings, then turned back to whatever they were doing. SUZI flapped forward to see that the saboteur drones were playing with a sizeable yellow, pink, and grey object, shoving it back and forth in midair while the thing let out muffled squeals of pain and misery, and occasionally a sloppy PPPPFFFFHHHHTTTT sound.

Upon closer inspection, she realized that the mysterious UFO was actually a single Sonee and two Roseys, stitched together mouth to anus and mounted to a light aluminum frame with four propellers keeping them airborne. A series of cameras had also been attached to the frame, along with several solar panels and surveillance devices. The only form of identification was a line of words along the side of the contraption – The Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede.

Bemused, SUZI dropped down below the UAV and stared at the Sonee at the front of the trio, waved, and poked it in both of its panicked, reptilian eyes. A low rumbling emanated from the baby chu's stomach, followed by another splattering PPPPFFFFHHHHTTTT as it reflexively emptied its bowels into the first Rosey's mouth. Unable to tear itself away, the little pink Electric Hedgehog Pokémon could only writhe and struggle as her cheeks ballooned with filth. SUZI merely giggled and flapped away, but not before uploading a few seconds of yaoi anime to her eye-screens. The Sonee immediately let out a stifled shriek and pissed itself, then began hastily swallowing and making hissing noises as it imagined the gay thoughts dissolving in its stomach.

Without warning, a speaker on top of the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede crackled into life, briefly screeching with feedback before an irritated voice addressed the gathered Devil Trolls and SUZI.

"Quit batting that thing arrrrround, you little rrrrascals!" barked Dr. Ivo Robotnik. "Now listen up and get a load of this! I've just been informed that the Trrrrrrrripod building's security is no more! Get down there and wrrrrrrrreck that place! You know what they say! The more, the me-"

"You don't say?" replied the LIESAs in one voice, and simultaneously crossed their stubs. "Challenge accepted. AAAAAAAAAWWWWWWW YEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Without waiting for Robotnik to finish his speech, each of the Devil Trolls folded his or her wings and plummeted into free fall, abandoning the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede to its eternal fate. Amidst the "LOLOLOL"s and "KEKEKEKE"s of her fellow saboteur drones, SUZI swooped left and right with utter joy, spinning and whirling as the other Devil Trolls shouted advice to their comrades. Most of said advice consisted of suggestions to perform barrel rolls.

As the roof of the Tripod building rushed up to meet her, SUZI flipped up and spread her wings out to create drag like an improvised parachute, giggling all the while. Playing with her insane friends was just so much fun! One by one, the paratrooper Devil Trolls landed on the roof and scurried into the nearest air duct, while SUZI toddled off by herself and blasted the maintenance door open with a rattling burst from her dual stubguns. Without the normal Devil Troll program installed in her mainframe, her preset sabotage mission was pretty much useless.

The interior of Tripod Filing was rather bleak in terms of decoration. Most of the building's upper level was just a simple corridor lined with security offices and control rooms, all of which surrounded a massive storage room in the center of the warehouse. This was where the Devil Trolls were headed – the greatest cache of Chandler's personal data, scanned artwork, and high-security passwords outside of the Shopping Center's own CWCipedia Archive.

"One does not simply waddle into Tripod!" squeaked the Devil Troll that SUZI had waved to as she flew through the open maintenance door to join her comrade. "If you know what I mean."

The two LIESAs flitted from shadow to shadow, staying out of sight of the occasional mercenary guards who patrolled the corridors. The loyalists still hadn't realized that their outer security had been breached, and that by now, dozens of Devil Trolls were scampering through the air ducts and passageways of the massive storage facility. From a wireless exchange of information, SUZI now knew that her new friend's name was ERMA, and that she had two merc and ten baby chu kills to her record. SUZI's killstreak was far more impressive in terms of Sonees and Roseys, but dispatching a loyalist was quite a bit more difficult than a larval Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. She hoped she'd get the chance to add a few mercenaries to the record.

"Loyalists," whispered ERMA, and gestured toward what looked like an adjacent lounge room containing at least a dozen men and women in riot gear and Kevlar. "Loyalists everywhere."

SUZI nodded silently. Ahead lay an entrance to the main storage room, guarded by a single merc with a shotgun. There wasn't much that could be done in terms of stealth, so both of the Devil Trolls decided to look for another way in. Around them, the distant sounds of flapping wings and scurrying stumpfeet heralded the presence of the main pack of saboteurs.

ERMA placed an armstub on her cheek and thought for a few seconds. "Not sure if better to fire laz0r now…or wait for HAAAAAAX. This rustles my jimmies."

As if on cue, the deafening blare of an alarm blasted through the facility, startling the guards and giving the two LIESA units the opportunity they had been waiting for.

"What is it? What's going on?" yelled one of the men in the lounge as he scrambled to retrieve his shotgun. "Holy shit, is it Juliets? Are we under attack?"

"We got a breach!" another merc in full armor and a gas mask shouted, and waved to the other loyalist soldiers. "Shotguns! Grab shotguns and watch the vents! Delta Tango! Delta Tango!"

"I got an idea," SUZI suggested, and picked up ERMA. "We're gonna laz0r-ram the door!"

"My body is ready," the LIESA replied, retracting her mouthguard as SUZI fired her repulsors and jetted out of the shadows with her Devil Troll comrade clutched in her armstubs, straight toward the door and its unsuspecting mercenary guard. "IMMA FIRIN' MAH LAZ0R!"

SHOOOOOOOOOOOP! The blinding beam of blue and white light seared across the hall and exploded in a colossal flash, barely missing the terrified loyalist as he dove for cover. Stunned, the man rolled over onto his back and aimed his shotgun at the source of the laz0r, but by that time, SUZI and ERMA had already blasted straight through the door, into the heart of Tripod.

---

North CWCville, Northern district, Menchi-Nasu, command and control room, 12:55 p.m.

"We just picked it up on the outskirts of the city, near the jungle," reported Vivian Gee as she hurried to her control station and pointed to a pulsing red dot on one of her monitors. The feed had been taken from the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede drone, and was currently zoomed in on a patch of terrain just beyond the eastern wall. "We've got a huge energy spike, right over here, for no reason at all. It's confined to this one little space, though, so I'm thinking it might be…" She scratched her head nervously. "Mary, I don't know what this is."

"Can you zoom in any further?" Mary Lee Walsh asked, leaning forward and squinting at the blobby patch on the screen. "How about the scans? Did you get a fix on its origin?"

"It's just coming up right now," Gee replied, and glanced at another computer. "Yep. There we go…wait, what?" Her voice faltered and her eyes narrowed. "That can't be right. Look at this. Is there something you're not telling me about the Dark Mirror Project, Mary? Is Graduon secure?"

"We shut that down after we trapped Crystal," stated Walsh. "The only remnant is the portable device, and it's still in my office with Graduon's staff. I just spoke to him a minute ago. Why?"

The intelligence officer pointed to a series of lines on a screen labeled ANALYSIS. "Because the energy reading we're getting from out there is an exact match for both the Dark Mirror and Graduon. Maybe someone managed to duplicate the technology?"

"Run another scan with that new energy sequence that BILLY picked up from Ivy in June," the PVCC commander ordered. "I still never got the chance to thank him for delivering that bag."

In the chaos of the June Offensive, it hadn't been too hard for BILLY MAYS to surreptitiously smuggle Ivy's duffle bag of valuable information into Menchi-Nasu via an OxiClean delivery truck. The contents of said bag had given the PVCC a critical edge in the war for CWCville, and had even led to their current sabotage attack on the Tripod Filing Facility.

"Okay, checking the new sequence now," continued Gee, and nodded as a second set of lines quickly assembled themselves to match the first. "Well, there we go. Perfect match. We've got a confirmed surge of dark energy at concentration levels one through three. But…why would this be happening now? The last rupture we had was the one in 2008, after Silvana rescued Ledger's squad. So either Graduon sent her back in there, or someone else's coming through from the-"

Vivian never had a chance to finish her hypothesis. Walsh had already plunged into a mad dash for her office, her face as white as a sheet and contorted with fear. It took another second for the Miscreant to realize just what it was that had terrified her commander, before it all clicked.

"CODE YELLOW!" she screamed into her microphone, startling every technician in the room. "ALL PERSONNEL, CODE YELLOW! ABORT THE OPERATION! ABORT! ABORT!"

---

Terrah Nova apartments, 25th floor, 12:59 p.m.

"WAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" screamed Cheri Rosey, kicking her stumpfeet helplessly as Matt ripped her skirt off and tore it in half, then tossed both pieces into the trash. "WAAAAHHHH! DAT'S MINE! GIMME IT BACK NOW YOU TWOLL! NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!"

"Oh, shut the fuck up," replied the Jerkop, and began looping a piece of twine around the baby chu's flabby neck. "That's it! You're a good, polite little Rosey. You know how to keep your mouth shut. See, that's why your brother Sammy got the Prickly-Wicklies. He didn't listen."

Cheri let out a strangled wail and glanced toward the bloody patch of carpet where, just minutes earlier, Matt had pounded the older of the two homebred Sonees into nothing more than a small pancake of crushed meat and fuzz with little broken bones sticking out in all directions. Kevin had only seen his friend use the large wrench once or twice as a close combat weapon, but the display had more than convinced him of Matt's utter cruelty when it came to larval slaughter.

"Sonee! SONEE!"

Kevin looked down and smiled. The tiny Sonee was wriggling in his hand, trying to bite him with its toothless mouth and pushing its armstubs against his fingers. It had long ago expended its small supply of bioelectricity, and its defenses were now reduced to screams and struggling. The Jerkop wordlessly turned and walked right into the bathroom, flipped up the toilet seat, and dropped the baby Electric Hedgehog Pokémon into the water. It began flailing around, screaming and kicking and attempting to right itself as it drifted back and forth, unable to climb out of its porcelain prison. Smiling cruelly, Kevin placed his pistol on the sink and unzipped his pants.

"WAAAAAHHHHH! WAAAAAHHHHHH!" Cheri continued wailing as Matt slid the window open and placed her on the sill. The Rosey attempted to waddle back off the edge into her room, but before she could, the Jerkop's hand closed around her pudgy body, pinning her down. "WAAAAHHHHH! NOOOOOO! WAT AWE YOU DOIN?! WAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

"This!" yelled Matt, and tossed the little chu out into empty space. Cheri's shriek of terror was quickly cut short, along with the rest of her as the twine noose cleanly separated her head from her body. Both of the bloody pieces tumbled down through the air, finally coming to a halt when they smashed into the concrete. Matt peeked over the edge and looked through his monocular to see a cluster of pink and yellow blobs waddling toward the tiny bloodstain on the alley below.

"Lunchtime, you little assholes," he chuckled, and closed the window just as the familiar sound of a toilet flushing and a momentary gurgling shriek reached his ears. A few seconds of running water followed, and Kevin emerged from the bathroom, minus the tiny Sonee. Matt didn't even need to ask what he'd done with the baby chu – that much was obvious.

"So, how'd the experiment go?" Kevin asked with a grin.

"Well, it pulled her head clean off," answered Matt, and shrugged. "Can't say I was expecting any big surprises. My question is…did that little shit actually fit down the pipe?"

Kevin nodded. "Yep. Let's just say they're gonna have to deal with one hell of a clog now."

"That is just fucking brutal, man." Matt picked up his wrench and wiped the bloodstain off on the carpet, then pointed back toward the living room. "Let's go see how they're doing."

"…no, no, no, that can't have been the order," Zoey snarled into her radio as the two Jerkops entered from the hallway. Nick and Nate were still scanning Tripod for guards, monitoring the facility as the Devil Trolls continued wreaking havoc inside. "We've got this under control. They should be finished in just a couple of minutes. Tell them to delay the order – we're too close!"

"This is a direct order from Walsh, Zoey!" replied Joe. "Every single HQ is going on high alert! Whatever happened, Magi-Chan knows we're here! You guys need to get out of there now!"

"Fuck it!" Zoey looked up from her walkie-talkie. "Right, everyone pack it up! We're aborting the mission. Something big just went down in Menchi-Nasu…I don't know what's going on, but it's important enough that Walsh just aborted Infodump. Get your gear together – we'll meet up with Steve and the others at the Battle Bus. Come on!"

"Wait. Wait, hold on," said Nate, and swept his Barrett's scope over to the right to see a small blue figure zoom up to the door of the Tripod facility and begin entering a password into the security panel. It was undeniably a Sonichu, but the markings on its neck…it almost looked like-

"Mierda," Nick gasped as he focused in on the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. "Dios…mio…"

"What? What is it?" Zoey drew her own monocular and pushed her way to the window, then froze. "Arceus…no…that's not…" Her mouth dropped open as she noticed something in the distance. "DOWN! GET DOWN!"

CRASH! The window shattered just above Nate as a sniper rifle round tore through it, missing his head by no more than a couple of inches. Instinctively dropping to the floor, the frightened Jerkop rolled over to see that his brother, Zoey, and Matt had already done the same to avoid further shots from the loyalist counter-sniper.

"Nick!" shouted Zoey. "You okay?"

There was only silence. Looking back to the other window, Nate could see Nick lying on his back, frozen as if in shock from the sudden attack. Teetering on the verge of a panic attack, the Jerkop crawled hand over hand across the room toward his fallen comrade.

"Come on, Nick!" he panted, and reached to grab the Jerkop's arm. "Come on, Nick, you're g-"

Nick let out a strangled cough. A line of blood ran down his cheek from the corner of his mouth, and a rush of terror surged through Nate. There hadn't just been a single lucky counter-sniper. The whole operation had been a setup from the beginning. Magi-Chan had anticipated them.

"NICK!" screamed Zoey as the Jerkop pulled the injured sniper away from the window, keeping his hand pressed against the bloody hole in his chest to staunch the bleeding. "NICK, NO! NO!"

"He's gonna bleed out!" yelled Kevin, and unzipped Nick's jacket and the Kevlar vest beneath it to expose the grievous wound. "Zoey, call for a medevac! We need Jexis! Matt, Nate, help me get him into the hall! Nick, don't pass out! DON'T YOU FUCKING PASS OUT, NICK!"

"Hit my lung…" choked the sharpshooter, his face twisted with agony. "Need to…"

"Stay still!" Drawing his knife, Kevin slashed off a large piece of cloth from the dead Rosechu's dress and crumpled it up into a makeshift bandage, then handed it to Nate, who pressed it against Nick's bleeding chest. The wounded Jerkop's heartbeat had grown faint and ragged, and his skin was turning paler and paler with each labored breath. "Just hold on! Hold on! We'll get help!"

"Jerkop down, Jerkop down!" Zoey shouted into her radio as Matt, Kevin and Nate dragged Nick out of the door and into the hallway. Crawling on her hands and knees, she followed them and drew her pistol just in case Magi-Chan had stationed any mercenary soldiers inside Terrah Nova. "Steve, come in! Nick's down! We need Jexis up here, now!"

"Fuck! FUCK! Zo, hang on!" yelled Steve. "Get him to the elevator! We'll extract you from the lobby! Wait." The Manajerk paused. "Zo, something's happening in Tripod!"

"No…" Zoey breathed as a deafening crackle of electricity echoed across the city. "NO! SUZI!"

---

Tripod Filing Facility, 1:03 p.m.

"FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU!" ERMA shrieked in fear as the spinning blue blur slashed through a group of Devil Trolls and reduced them to an airborne cloud of metal and cloth scraps. "ERMAHGERD! OH CRAP! ERMAHGERD! IMPOSSIBRU! FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU!"

Terrified, SUZI grabbed her new friend and dove behind a large filing cabinet, her eye-screens spasming erratically in a multicolored frenzy as the circuits in her CPU struggled to process this new and overpowered threat. Another broken Devil Troll smashed into the floor not two feet away from the hidden LIESAs, and only had enough time to let out a single "What is this I don't even" before its eye-screens sizzled and went blank. Around the massive room, more mercenary soldiers and Devil Trolls were locked in combat, trading shotgun blasts and laz0rs back and forth in a shootout of epic proportions while the Sonichu intruder continued destroying the saboteurs.

"Huahhh…" the blue Electric Hedgehog Pokémon panted as he leapt into the air, leaving at least a dozen smashed Devil Trolls behind. More of the LIESAs swooped in to attack him, a desperate bid to buy their comrades enough time to finish infecting and corrupting the large computers and data storage devices in the warehouse. Whatever they couldn't hack with their USB tails, they laz0red. By now, most of the loyalist information had either been destroyed or else was beamed to Menchi-Nasu via the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede relay. The Sonichu might very well have been able to prevent the massive data theft if he had simply concentrated his efforts on destroying the Devil Trolls attacking the computers and filing cabinets, but caught up in a heroic fervor, he continued battling the decoy LIESAs, all the while smiling victoriously.

Firing her repulsors, SUZI shot up into the air and body-slammed an incoming mercenary at top speed. The impact of being hit by a forty-pound steel projectile knocked the man flat on his back, cracking several ribs and giving the combat drone enough time to swivel toward another loyalist soldier and retract her own brand new mouthguard.

"IMMA FIRIN' MAH LAZ0R!" she yelled, and blasted the mercenary straight through the wall. As the injured soldier beneath her feebly reached for his sidearm, SUZI drew back her hydraulic stub and punched him right in the forehead in a similar maneuver to that of a captive bolt gun being used on a cow. Instantly killed, the man collapsed, blood leaking from the hole in his head.

"ERMAHGERD! FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU! OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!"

SUZI looked back to see ERMA sink her sharp little teeth into the blue Sonichu's arm, drawing blood. Before she could fly away to a safe distance, a gloved hand closed around her USB tail, and a single bolt of electricity seared across the little Devil Troll's body. Her anti-shock systems were unable to disperse such a powerful surge, and as SUZI watched in horror, ERMA's eye-screens flashed and faded. The reactive microfibers that formed her "hair" immediately stiffened into a defensive state – a razor-sharp blade that the drones could use as a close combat weapon.

"NooooOOOOOOOoooooooOOOOOoooo oooOOOO!" wailed SUZI. Huge tears formed in her own eye-screens as she watched her friend's body go limp. "WHYYYYyyyyYYYYY?!"

A smug grin spread across the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon's face as he whirled ERMA around by her tail like a sword, then leaped through the air and landed in the middle of a circle of Devil Trolls. In less than two seconds, the little group of saboteur drones had been cleaved apart, slashed into pieces by their own comrade. Panic spread through the LIESA units as more mercs arrived, reinforcements sent by Magi-Chan to aid in the defense of Tripod. The survivors rapidly scattered back into the air ducts, making their way out of the building and leaving SUZI behind. Their work was done, and what remained of the data was now too corrupt for the loyalists to use.

"Well, ah, dat was a real 'fairytale fight'…" commented the Sonichu, standing triumphantly with his hands on his hips as he watched the broken Devil Trolls burst into flame and explode in little fireballs. Reaching to a filing cabinet, he picked up a copy of Brütal Legend for the Playstation 3 and held it up to show the loyalists. "Rated 'M' for 'Moof'; don't be a Moof or aloof, keep it 'E' or 'T' for your children, or, uh, or give viewer discretion or supervision during gameply. Even though I have pl…I have enjoyed 'Brutal Legend,' starring Jack Black."

"M…Mayor Chandler?" a mercenary soldier, a sergeant, asked in disbelief as he and the remnants of his squad cautiously approached the Sonichu. "Sir, is that you? Is it really you?"

"Yes it's true; I have returned from tha Ti…from tha stressful, uh, situation I was forced ta endure while waiting for tha return to my Sweetheart from tha Ground-Up, Ivy!" sighed Chris-Chan Sonichu wistfully. "An' now dat tha Devil Trolls have been dealt with, we will finally get married like a real cou…a real True Love Couple, an' den we will go on our honeymoon an'…"

"Hate to break it to you, sir," the sergeant interrupted, "but Ivy O'Neil was killed in a rebel attack two months ago. I'm sorry, Mayor Chandler. BILLY MAYS tried to save her."

Chandler glanced at the floor and sighed again. "Ah, um…ohhhhkay… Well, uh, I must find my future wife, Lovely Weather. But first; tha Sonichu material must be saved!" He raised a hand and closed his eyes. In a flash of purple energy, the piles of corrupted data and files vanished, teleported across time and space to the safety of the Shopping Center's mayoral office. As the mercenaries stared in confusion, Chris-Chan Sonichu cupped his gloved hands together and conjured a sizzling ball of electricity - a Lightning Bomb with enough power to destroy Tripod.

"What's that, sir?" asked another loyalist officer, a lieutenant. "Sir, what are you-"

"I, uh, I must make sure tha nasty Devil Trolls do not escape after TROLLING ME!" Chandler shouted, surprising every soldier within earshot. "Y'all should…y'all should get out of tha building before, uh, before tha Lightning Bomb explodes." He raised his hand and the crackling sphere levitated into the air, pulsing and rippling with immense amounts of destructive energy.

"WHAT?" yelled the first mercenary sergeant. "Mayor, we don't have time to get everyone-"

"Chaotic Control!" yelled Chris-Chan Sonichu, and vanished in the blink of an eye.

"MOTHERFUCKER!" roared the lieutenant. "EVERYONE OUT NOW! GET OUT OF HERE!"

---

Terrah Nova apartments, lobby, 1:05 p.m.

"DOWN! EVERYONE ON THE GROUND!" Kevin shouted, charging out of the elevator as the Battle Bus screeched to a halt in front of the apartment lobby. Raising the AK-47 to his shoulder, he took aim at a screaming Rosechu and gunned her down with a vicious three-round burst while Zoey busied herself by opening fire on another chu family and riddling the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon with a barrage of rifle rounds. "Nate, Matt, get Nick to the bus! COME ON! MOVE!"

"Arceus, Arceus, Arceus!" snarled Zoey in a panicked rage, and stomped as hard as she could on a Sonee that was trying to waddle away to safety. The little chu shrieked in agony as its spine shattered beneath her boot, but a quick shot to the back of the head silenced its wailing. "I swear, I'm gonna kill 'em all if they even fucking touch SUZI!"

"JIMMY! NOOOOO!" screamed the Sonee's mother as her baby screamed and collapsed, dead. She whirled toward her husband and pointed to the Jerkops. "Get her, sweetbolt! Zap the trolls!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU VAPID BITCH!" Zoey drew her pistol and blasted a hole in the Sonichu's head before he could even move, then lunged forward and buried the tip of her AK's bayonet into the small bundle of blankets that the Rosechu was holding. An agonized wail of "WOSEEEEEEEY!" split the air, but the enraged Jerkop shoved her rifle forward, impaling the tiny Rosey and its mother in one vicious stab. Two shots to the Rosechu's head quickly resolved the situation, but Zoey wasn't even close to being done. Drawing a frag grenade from her belt, she ripped the pin off and tossed it into a small stroller that held another baby Rosey, then kicked the entire thing straight into a Sonichu and Rosechu couple that were hugging each other in fear.

On the other side of the lobby, Kevin glanced up at the sudden explosion to see the lovehogs fly apart, their flesh torn asunder by hundreds of pieces of shrapnel. By now, any human tenants had already either hidden out of the line of fire or else had fled to safety, giving the Jerkops a clean path straight to the Battle Bus. As long as the Sonichus and Rosechus didn't try and attack them, they still had a chance of saving Nick. The sniper had already lost a lot of blood, and worse, he was now coughing up little red drops with every labored breath. If Jexis could fix him, it would be an absolute miracle.

The door of the armored school bus hissed open, revealing the blonde medic and Serge. Kevin's immediate relief upon seeing his friends again was quickly overcome by the urgency of Nick's situation. Aided by Serge's strength, Matt and Nate loaded the injured Jerkop into the Battle Bus and followed Kevin inside, while Zoey finished executing the last remaining Electric Hedgehog Pokémon family in the lobby. As a last act of cruelty, she grabbed a fleeing Sonee by its sneaker, hurried back to the bus and shoved the baby chu right in front of the tire so it couldn't escape.

"What the fuck happened?" Steve yelled, abandoning the driver's seat so Matt could take the wheel. "Zo, get in here! What happened to him?"

"Counter-sniper," panted Zoey as she dashed up the stairs into the bus and closed the door. "We were set up. Something went wrong. Steve…he's back. Chandler's back."

The Manajerk's eye widened in shock. "What? Did you see him?"

Zoey nodded and glanced at the back of the bus, where Kevin and Jexis were hurriedly setting up a blood transfer between Serge and Nick. "Steve, we need to get into that warehouse. Chandler's after the Devil Trolls."

"Son of a bitch. SUZI…" Steve growled, gritting his teeth in helpless rage. "FUCKING HELL! Matt, get us to Tripod, ASAP! FLOOR IT!"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-CRUNCH!" The Sonee was transformed into a red smear on the asphalt as Matt stepped on the gas and pulled away from Terrah Nova into the street toward the Tripod building, crushing the baby chu's tiny body beneath the weight of the entire Battle Bus. Cars honked and swerved out of the way, barely avoiding the massive school bus as it plowed on through the traffic jam, its front-mounted battering ram pushing aside the civilian vehicles as if they were mere toys. Kevin grabbed the nearest seat to steady himself while Jexis kept working on Nick. The ruptured lung would require intensive surgical treatment to fix, but she had at least managed to stabilize the injured Jerkop with the help of Serge's blood. Kevin collapsed into the seat beside Allie and hugged her, his heart pounding with relief. If they could just get SUZI…

A flash of purple light seared across the city and formed into a sheet of pure energy that rapidly spread down over the Tripod building, enveloping the entire facility in a dome. Staring through the Battle Bus's front window in shock, Kevin could see a few dozen Devil Trolls flapping away into the sky, while several of their comrades had been trapped within the dome. On the ground, only a few of the loyalist mercenaries had managed to escape in time. The majority were still sealed inside the psychic energy shield, pounding on the rippling surface with their fists and screaming desperate profanities as they tried to force their way through the unyielding wall.

There came another flash from the Tripod building, far brighter and more horrific than any blast Kevin or any of the Honey Badgers had seen before. A lightning-laced fireball exploded from the center of the shielded warehouse like some chaotic superweapon out of a science fiction movie, filling the dome with fire and arcs of energy in less than five seconds. Kevin heard Kuri and Nate gasp in shock as the trapped mercenaries vanished into the firestorm, along with the Devil Trolls who hadn't managed to escape the dome. The churning, blazing explosion continued for another few moments, then dispersed, leaving nothing but a large pile of rubble, scorched foundations, and several dozen blazing corpses of the loyalists who had died trying to escape.

Kevin felt a sick, cold hatred building in the pit of his stomach. He knew that the mercenaries held nothing but contempt for the PVCC and every Jerkop in it. He knew they had shot Nick, slaughtered countless operatives, and helped to carry out the Mayor's orders. But they were still human. And now Chandler had rewarded their service with nothing but burning, shocking death.

"SUZI!" screamed Zoey in utter anguish, pounding her fists against the seat in front of her as tears streamed from her eyes. "NO! ARCEUS, NO! NOT SUZI!"

"She could've gotten out, Zo!" Steve shouted reassuringly, and hurried to the front of the Battle Bus. "Matt, take us to the blast site! Kuri, Kevin, go with Zoey and see if you can salvage anything!" He pointed to the door as Matt pulled the bus up alongside the ruins of Tripod. "GO!"

"Be careful!" Allie called after Kevin as he rose from his seat and sprinted after Zoey and Kuri.

Outside of the Battle Bus, the destroyed warehouse loomed ahead of the Honey Badgers, while a thick column of black smoke rose from the wreckage. A large crowd of human and chu civilians had gathered on the outskirts of the blast radius and were now staring at the distressed and extremely depleted remnants of the loyalist mercenary platoon that had been all but destroyed by the explosion. Some of the soldiers had fallen to their knees in shock, while a few others were checking their fallen comrades for signs of life. The only figure who stood out among the cluster of blue and black-armored loyalists was Chris-Chan Sonichu himself, standing proudly in front of the smoking ruins with a smug smirk on his furry face.

"Well, ah, Tripod was weak in security, and it did not have…uh, it lacked tha support for Flash media anyway," Chandler announced to no one in particular. "Moving on…"

"You killed them, Mayor."

Kevin looked up as he and the two other Jerkops crept unseen through the ruins. A loyalist had stepped forward to confront the blue Sonichu, his voice shaking with rage at the loss of so many of his squadmates and friends.

"I did not, uh, I did not do that. I did not kill tha True Blue an' Honest protectors of CWCville," retorted Chandler. "Tha Tripod was not…tha Tripod had to be destroyed because of tha Devil Trolls! They were making it VERY stressful for me an' I do not appreciate dat at all!"

"You blew up the entire building," another merc snarled. "Our friends were still inside."

"Then, ah, then they should have been faster getting out of tha Tripod Storage!" the blue Sonichu exclaimed, nodding as if his explanation made any sort of sense to anyone but himself. "Tha trolls must have made dem not…uh, too slow with dere dirty trollin' powers!" He stress-sighed. "Now I gotta deal with all tha STRESS they keep givin' me an' dis is NOT helping ONE BIT!"

The loyalists looked on, stunned beyond words at the irresponsibility and self-centeredness of their supreme commander. Kevin was surprised to find himself feeling sorry for the mercenaries. They had been trying to follow Chandler's orders, and in return, their friends and fellow soldiers had been sacrificed just to destroy less than a dozen Devil Trolls.

"I will make sure an' give them a…I will make a memorial to honor dere bravery in tha face of trolling," Chris-Chan Sonichu continued, and smiled. "I think dat, I suggest dat y'all learn ta forgive an' move on. Tha Jerks at tha PVCC an' Mary Lee Walsh must be brought ta justice!" Without another word, he dashed off through the streets in a blurry streak of blue and white fur.

"Kevin…Zoey…"

Kevin looked back to see Kuri kneeling in the ash, surrounded by tiny pieces of destroyed Devil Trolls and cradling one of the LIESA units in her arms. The little Devil Troll's cloth costume had been scorched off, and its eye-screens were gently flickering from grey to blue and back to grey. Once in a while, it made a faint squeaking sound, but couldn't even find the energy to speak even one last meme. As Kevin and Zoey gathered around, the saboteur drone gave off a final burst of sparks, and went limp in the Jerkop's hands.

"Is it her?" Zoey asked weakly. "Kuri, is it SUZI?"

Kuri shook her head. A tear ran down her cheek and splashed on the Devil Troll's face, hissing as it touched the hot metal. "I don't know…there…there's dozens of them. All dead…"

"Don't move."

Kevin turned to see a single mercenary, a young, dark-skinned man with short hair and weary-looking eyes, standing on a piece of rubble behind the Honey Badgers. A SCAR-H assault rifle was clutched in his hands, and it was pointing directly toward Zoey's chest. The blood seemed to freeze in Kevin's veins as he realized just how easily the loyalist had snuck up on them while they had been distracted with the Devil Trolls.

"Don't move," repeated the man. "I don't want to kill any of you."

"You're going to have to," spat Kuri, and rose to her feet with her P90 in hand. "You shoot her, and I'll make sure you die slowly, you loyalist piece of shit."

"Please," said the mercenary, startling the Honey Badgers. "Please, just listen to me. I'm not going to report you, I'm not going to capture you, and I'm not going to kill you. I want to help."

Kevin drew back, surprised. "What?"

"I know. You don't have any reason to trust me." The man let out a long sigh. "My name's Ben. Benjamin Waters. I was…I mean, I still am part of the Jenkin's Jinkies mercenary squad. But I can't do this anymore. Chandler's back, and I can't keep working for someone who's lost his mind to the chus. I've seen what they do to us…to you. I can't live like this, knowing that I've been helping to destroy this city."

Zoey blinked. "You're switching sides?"

"I have information." Ben lowered his assault rifle and dropped down to join the Honey Badgers. Instantly, three muzzles snapped to his chest as Kevin, Kuri, and Zoey raised their weapons.

"Put it down and kick it away," commanded Zoey. Once the mercenary had done as she had ordered with both the SCAR-H and his pistol, she nodded approvingly. "Very noble. Very kind. Very suspicious, though. For all we know, you're setting us up for an ambush. We ought to just shoot you on general principle, Waters. One of our squadmates was just…"

"I know. Please. I don't know what else I can tell you," pleaded Ben. Kevin could see a tiredness in the man's eyes – an expression that betrayed the immense mental trauma he had endured in his service to Chandler's cause. "My squad's been tracking yours. They sent me out to follow you. My…one of my squadmates shot your sniper. Is he…"

"No," growled Kuri, and pressed the barrel of her P90 against the loyalist's chest. "He's alive."

"We need to go," urged Kevin, pushing his squadmate's weapon aside. He stepped aside to let Zoey pull Ben's hands behind his back and fasten them together with a zip tie. "And you're coming with us. There's no way we're letting you out of our sight until you talk to Walsh."

---

Menchi-Nasu, administrator meeting room, 1:43 p.m.

"We're facing a complete collapse of the entire resistance," Mary Lee Walsh snapped, pacing back and forth in front of the monitors as the other Miscreants looked on. "Chandler took out our Devil Troll swarm, and I've been getting reports of Jerkop casualties from the sniper support teams. Magi-Chan knew we were going to hit Tripod. The data we got back from the raid isn't enough to go on. We need to know where he's going to attack next, and we need to know now. I need someone on the inside. The last time we heard from BILLY was more than a week ago, but there's no reason to believe he's been compromised. If what that mercenary said turns out to be true, Menchi-Nasu's going to be facing an all-out assault within the hour."

"So, full alert then," Jason Kendrick Howell mused. "Mary, do you think he might attack Alec?"

"The only way Chandler could find Alec would be if he got through you and Beel first, Jason," answered Walsh. "How long did the last prisoner we sent you last?"

"Tried a Thunderpunch right off the bat," chuckled Howell. "Beel doesn't like those. We're still cleaning the blood and fur off the lobby ceiling. And in any case, we've got traps in place if our mutual friend decides to go for 4-cent_garbage. But if anything, Mary, I'd be worried about you and your s…your allies in Menchi-Nasu. Chandler must be down to only a few options now as to where the main HQ is in CWCville. He's going to remember his high school days eventually, and when that happens, not even Graduon will be able to shield you."

Walsh frowned. "Then let's just hope he doesn't."

"The time for hope passed as soon as Magi-Chan pulled Chandler out of the Time Void, Mary," finished the 4-cent administrator. "Kathleen and I are going to start the lockdown procedures. If the first line of defense goes down, Clyde and Jack should be able to handle the rest."

"I'm sending you Reldnahc as well," the PVCC commander insisted. "You'll need an Electric Hedgehog Pokémon for backup, just in case. Don't worry about us – we've got Wes, Simonchu, and Silvana. Stay safe, and let us know if anything happens."

Howell nodded and clicked off his video feed. Walsh waited another couple of seconds, then turned to face Liquid Chris, Kacey, Robert Simmons, and Vivian Gee.

"Are all the squads back from Tripod yet?" she asked concernedly. "How many Devil Trolls survived the blast?"

Gee glanced at the display tablet in her hand. "Only about twenty…twenty-one. We've got only two damaged ones left in the ruins, and one signature keeps popping up in the Shopping Center. Probably a glitch. In any case, we can always get Ivo to make more. As for the Jerkops, we just sealed off the outer gate after Ledger's bus returned ten minutes ago. Minimal casualties – just a few severe injuries from sniper fire. Two dead." She looked up. "Mary…out of curiosity, how would Chandler have found Menchi-Nasu?"

Walsh sighed. "I had my suspicions. I told Giovanni and Ivo to keep an eye on their personnel, especially after Blake went rogue. I didn't believe that stupid excuse for one second – that clone didn't just turn traitor after Bubbles sweet-talked him. Someone built a failsafe into his genetic code – a complete reversion of what he was created for. Someone gave him the potential to become a real Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. And until this morning, all I had was this suspicion."

Simmons blinked. "So…what changed your mind?"

"I got a call from Wilderness security at 3:30 a.m.," explained Walsh. Apparently, someone managed to hack the outer defenses long enough for a single person to be able to slip in through the west entrance. Of course, Robotnik locked the HQ down and had his Badniks scan for intruders, but there wasn't any need. No one was sneaking in. Someone had escaped."

"Son of a bitch," growled Kacey. "Schwartz."

The PVCC commander nodded. "He knew this was going to happen. But he couldn't give away Wilderness's location. No, he thought he'd just serve us to Chandler on a silver platter."

A red light flashed overhead, and an automated siren began blaring through the HQ. Vivian Gee's recorded announcement began moments later, warning the PVCC personnel of Menchi-Nasu that their outer security was under attack. Walsh pressed a few buttons on her remote, and the large projector screen descended and clicked on. Through the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede's camera feed, the Miscreants could see a colossal column of yellow squad cars, transport vans, and entire platoons of Sonichus advancing through the streets toward the southern gate of the PVCC HQ. At long last, the might of the EHPF had been mobilized.

"Upgrade the alert from Yellow to Red," Walsh instructed, her face grim. "We're under attack."

One by one, the administrators filed out of the room, leaving their commander alone with nothing but the screen for company. When she was sure that they had gone, Walsh turned and stepped through the door to her office, closed it, and locked it behind her. Her stony expression immediately softened, and for the first time that day, she allowed worry to take hold of her.

"Come out, sweetheart," she called softly as she grabbed Graduon's staff and began searching the room, peeking under her desk and chair. "Honey, come here. I need to tell you something."

---

Menchi-Nasu, southern gate, 1:49 p.m.

"The evacuations to Slumberland will commence momentarily," Vivian Gee's voice blasted out of the exterior PA speakers surrounding the fortified high school. "Remain calm. All Jerkops on defense assignment, your orders are to hold off the attack as long as you can, then fall back squad by squad into the garage and extract through the eastern gate. The EHPF are going to hit that gate with everything they've got." She paused. "Give them hell, Jerkops! PVCC!"

"RISE! RESIST! REVOLUTION!" shouted the immense crowd of nearly one hundred and sixty armed men and women that formed the triple firing line of sandbags, Jeeps, heavy machine gun emplacements, and concrete barricades set up behind Menchi-Nasu's southern gate. As the roaring chant swept across the city, the ominous sound of marching footsteps and rumbling engines slowed, then stopped. Silence fell, broken only by the rushing of wind above the city.

Gripping his AK-47 in trembling fingers, Kevin forced himself not to think about what Nick was going through. The wounded sniper was still confined to the medical quarters, to be extracted out via the Battle Bus with the other Honey Badgers once Walsh sounded the retreat. As for the rest of the squad, Allie, Serge, and Matt – the heaviest hitters – had been placed under Kevin and Steve at the frontline, while Zoey took the middle with Kuri, Jexis, and Nate. Surrounded by operatives from thirteen different squads, the nine Jerkops had never felt more insignificant in their lives. This was a battle unlike any they had ever faced before – a last stand against a force of nearly three thousand motivated and eager Sonichus. Kevin knew that there weren't too many ways the battle could end that didn't involve heavy PVCC losses, but he still clung to a hope that maybe, just maybe, they could last long enough to retreat, and thus survive the onslaught.

"Many shock-pigs outside," Serge commented, gleefully spinning Baba Yaga's barrels around and around as he listened to the sounds of approaching Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. "Many more shock-pigs for Baba Yaga to play with, yes? Oh yes, my darling, how you will play!"

"You are fucking terrifying, Big Bear," Matt commented as he nervously rearranged a line of five extra AA-12 magazines on the sandbag beside him. "Kevin? You okay, dude?"

"Fine. Never better," Kevin muttered distractedly, and looked over his shoulder, back to Menchi-Nasu. The shrieking sound of jet engines echoed across the soon-to-be battlefield, and with a flaring burst of light, the HQ's squadron of Crackder drones shot up out of their hangar and into the afternoon sky, then spun away towards Wilderness. One by one, the PVCC's assets were being shipped away, divided up among the other HQs across CWCville. Wilderness was to be the next main base of operations for Walsh and her lieutenants, while the Honey Badgers would reclaim their first home, Slumberland, once the transfer was complete.

Allie flipped her mask down and braced the heavy flamethrower against the wall of sandbags. Clad in her reinforced orange fire suit, the young woman looked more than ready to unleash the fury of Trogdor the Burninator against whatever Chandler might throw at Menchi-Nasu. Kevin would have loved to have given her one last kiss before deployment, but he knew it would have only clouded both of their minds. There was no room for hesitation here, or longing. This was war, and unless every Jerkop fought for all they were worth, the entire resistance would crumble.

"JERKOPS, MAKE READY!" Kacey Devoria shouted through her megaphone. She and Liquid Chris had volunteered as joint commanders of the defense, while Robert Simmons and Vivian Gee oversaw the evacuation inside. As for Walsh, Kevin knew that she was probably struggling to keep control of the situation at the moment, arranging transportation and discussing battle plans with the other administrators. There had been rumors that the PVCC supreme commander would be coming out to fight alongside her Jerkops, but at the moment, that seemed unlikely.

Kevin gritted his teeth as another feedback shriek sounded from beyond the southern gate. The Electric Hedgehog Pokémon had no idea how to operate megaphones apart from "pull the trigger and yell stuff at people", a flaw which had often given away their positions in the past.

"ATTENTION, PVCC JERKS!" an aggravatingly whiny voice addressed the Jerkop defenders. "WE HAVE Y'ALL SURROUNDED! PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPONS AND CEASE YOUR TROLLING ACTIVITIES IMMEDIATELY OR WE WILL ZAP Y'ALL TO THE EXTREME!"

"Come get some, Sparkies," growled Kevin, tightening his grip on the AK-47. Neither Liquid Chris nor Kacey responded to the illogical threat. The HQ wasn't surrounded at all – the EHPF had only approached from the south, showing no sign of tactics or strategy whatsoever.

"They'll rush the gate all at once," Steve muttered. "Spin Dashes, probably. Once they get through, I want everyone firing until you run out of ammo. Kevin, keep sending grenades over the wall. Matt, Allie, take out any chu that gets within ten yards of us. The bulk of their army's going to hit us front and center, but watch the sides in case any spill over." He strapped on his white gas mask and rolled his head around, cracking the tendons in his neck. "Here we go."

WHAM! The gate shuddered, and several dozen large dents appeared in its thick steel surface. Biting his lip, Kevin clutched the AK's grenade launcher and adjusted his aim so that the first shot would arc right over the charging Electric Hedgehog Pokémon and explode in the midst of the advancing army. Serge had set up Baba Yaga in the middle of their little patch of barricade, which gave him free reign to sow as much destruction as he could among the first wave of chus. And just in case the following waves were any worse, he had brought two more ammo boxes.

Another rumbling smash sounded from the gate as more and more Sonichus Spin Dashed into it, each one eager to prove his heroism to any Rosechus who happened to be watching on FQX. More and more dents appeared, and the thick metal panels began to buckle inward. It wouldn't last much longer. At the rate the EHPF were attacking, the final support would give in just…

CRASH! As Kevin looked on with grim determination, the two halves of the massive gate swung open with a rusty squeal, revealing what appeared to be a rippling sea of yellow headspikes and black-tipped, pointed ears. Hundreds of Sonichus waited just outside, with hundreds more lined up behind them as reserves. And every single one of them was ready and willing to fight to the death to serve their beloved Mayor and their demigod heroes of the Chaotic Combo.

In short, the PVCC was staring down a yellow and black nightmare comparable only to a swarm of Japanese giant hornets. Hyperactive, electrically-charged, 5'4" Japanese giant hornets.

"Hold fire," commanded Steve as the other Manajerks and squad leaders passed on the message to their operatives. "Walsh had a little welcoming committee set up for occasions just like this."

Behind the Jerkops, the familiar ominous strings of Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries" began to play from the PA systems of Menchi-Nasu. As Kevin looked over his shoulder, a strange sound, like the chopping of dozens of tiny helicopters, split the air, which was quickly followed by a cloud of odd four-rotored aircraft that rose up behind the school in a floating pink and yellow armada. Only when the objects passed close enough did the Jerkop realize what they were.

Its tiny engine shrieking, the first of the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede bomber drones peeled off from the main group and descended rapidly, its trio of unwilling passengers struggling and kicking as they plowed into the dumbstruck army of Sonichus and detonated spectacularly. The massive fireball of igniting C4 engulfed at least a dozen EHPF, scattering any of the Sonichus unfortunate enough to have been standing within ten feet of the exploding fuzzy blobs. Caught completely off guard, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon advancing from the back could only unsuccessfully attempt to turn and flee, only to be caught in the next wave of thunderous blasts. One by one, the sewn-together Sonees and Roseys rained down like kamikaze planes in World War II, blasting immense holes in the tightly-packed infantry columns. Blinding balls of fire and geysers of detonating flesh and fur exploded through the streets, wreaking havoc and panic among the Sonichus as their comrades died around them.

A cheer rang out from the PVCC barricade as the last of the suicide quadrocopters swooped and burst through the ranks of the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, killing the final few members of the initial attack wave that had broken through the gate. "Ride of the Valkyries" abruptly stopped, and only the screams of injured Sonichus rose to fill the silence.

Then, with a deafening roar, the second wave of EHPF infantry charged.

"FIRE!" yelled Liquid Chris and Kacey simultaneously into their megaphones.

"FIRE!" roared Steve, sweeping a hand toward the line of rapidly approaching Sonichus.

"FIRE AT WILL! KILL THEM ALL!" screamed Vivian Gee through Menchi-Nasu's PA system.

The Jerkop battle lines exploded into a cacophony of gunfire, ranging from the near-inaudible pops of pistol shots to the low, stuttering drumrolls of the .50 caliber machine guns mounted on each of the rebel support Jeeps. Kevin squeezed the trigger of his AK-47 and braced himself against the barricade as Baba Yaga spun and roared beside him. The first twenty or so Sonichus were literally vaporized under the explosive barrage, their shattered bodies reduced to showers of red mist and gobbets of slimy flesh. Undaunted by the death of their comrades, the next group of EHPF zoomed through the gate and charged the line, their cheekspots crackling with energy.

"BRACE! BRACE!" yelled another Manajerk from further down the line. Immediately, most of the Jerkops dropped to one knee and ducked their heads behind cover to avoid the searing volley of Thundershocks. Out of the corner of his eye, Kevin saw a female operative fall backward, her mouth gushing smoke and her eyes burning from where the bioelectric attack had connected with her skull. Another two PVCC soldiers were struck and electrocuted in the first barrage, unable to withstand such a high level of voltage even with the added protection of their rubber boots and vests. At range, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon were pathetically outmatched, and the Jerkops weren't at all worried about a shootout. It was close combat with the chus that truly scared them.

Swapping out his spent magazine for a fresh one, Kevin flipped the AK's firing rate to three-round bursts and began picking off targets left and right, focusing his efforts on the Sonichus that Serge's violent barrage had missed. It was only an educated guess, but he estimated that about a hundred of the EHPF chus had been slaughtered in the preliminary bombings and the first assault, which left the PVCC just over 2900 more to kill. The chus just kept on coming, hurling themselves at the Jerkop lines like army ants with no regard for their safety or the actual combat effectiveness of their plan. No living Sonichu had entered Trogdor's range so far, but several yellow bodies lay against the sandbags, having skidded wildly across the battlefield after death.

"OUT!" Serge bellowed, ripping his first empty ammo belt free of Baba Yaga as the weapon spun down and ceased firing. Seizing the opportunity now that the minigun had stopped, another large cluster of EHPF burst through the gate, but this time, the next wave didn't stop and wait for the first one to be torn apart. Like an unending tide of spiky yellow fury, the Sonichus charged, some rolling themselves into balls to launch Spin Dashes at the embattled barricade.

"Son of a bitch…HERE WE GO!" Steve braced the XM8 against his arm and began sweeping the weapon back and forth as it fired, peppering the ground and the approaching chus with heavy gunfire. Right on cue, Matt and Allie rose and fired simultaneously, just as the first balls of spikes smashed into the sandbag wall on the eastern flank. One Sonichu was transformed into a frenzied fireball by a sustained burst from Trogdor, while Matt unloaded three devastating blasts into another and ducked back down just in time to avoid being struck and mutilated by the dead chu's spinning upper half. Poking the AA-12 out again, he fired on another and smiled as the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon spun around and around from momentum, screaming in pain while it clutched at the ragged bones and slippery intestines where its pelvis had once been.

Kevin shot the chu twice in the head, then inserted another 40mm grenade and sent it arcing into the advancing crowd of EHPF. Without bothering to wait and see what kind of damage he had caused, he dropped his aim and shot the feet out from beneath a Sonichu, then swiveled to the right and emptied the rest of his second magazine into a pair of chus zipping toward the White Medallions. One of the stricken Electric Hedgehog Pokémon managed to pull itself another foot toward the barricade before Blanca Weiss put it down with a burst from her UMP 45.

With a sickening crunch and a sound like a buzzsaw, an airborne Sonichu spinning in ball form slammed into the Spikes of Blue barricade, blasting straight through the sandbags and shredding through one of their operatives in a cloud of thick blood droplets. The man's mutilated corpse hit the ground as his squadmates closed in around the breach, yelling vicious battle cries while they unloaded on the horde of chus. Despite a near ironclad defense, the PVCC operatives were being cut down one by one beneath the sheer number of enemy Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. On the western flank, a Jerkop from the ALBinos took a lightning bolt to the chest and dropped in a smoking heap while his comrades struggled to administer CPR. Two yards away from Steve, one of the Tomgirls was instantly killed when a Sonichu dashed right up to him and Thunderpunched him in the face, but a double shotgun blast from Lars McNulty quickly dispatched the chu.

The world had become a blur to Kevin, a grey and red and yellow and black blur that flashed before his eyes furiously, refusing to cease its assault on his senses. He had long ago lost count of just how many of the EHPF assault force he had killed, but it had to be somewhere in the dozens by now. Allie was keeping the Sonichus at bay with short bursts of flame while Steve reloaded his XM8 and Matt helped Serge link Baba Yaga's second ammo belt to the minigun. Glancing down at his watch, Kevin nearly felt his knees buckle as he realized that a mere twelve minutes had passed since the beginning of the Battle of Menchi-Nasu.

Only twenty to go, he thought desperately, and reached for another grenade.

---

Menchi-Nasu, command and control room, 2:11 p.m.

"I want you out of here on the next evacuation convoy," Mary Lee Walsh ordered as Vivian Gee hurried from computer to computer, transferring their contents to a massive external hard drive that she had tucked under her arm. The other PVCC technicians had already left for Wilderness, along with most of the R&D staff. "If all else fails today, I need someone faithful to our cause. I won't let this war be dictated by the ideals of fanaticism or greed. Make no mistake, Ivo and Giovanni will try to take my place if I get killed or captured."

"That's not going to happen, Mary," replied Gee, tapping her fingers against her desk while she waited for the final download to complete. "Come on, come on! Mary, I don't see why you can't just come with us. They're holding off the attack with minimal losses."

"Vivian, you make it sound like the Jerkops are expendable," Walsh muttered. "They're anything but. Without Menchi-Nasu, we're going to need them more than ever for the campaign ahead."

"Speaking of which…" The intelligence officer handed her commander a sheet of paper. "We're going to have to try something other than the TMZ idea for Hedgeclipper. The camera drones keep getting recognized before they can even get inside 14 Brunchville. Mary, I don't see why we can't just airstrike the house and kill those three little abominations once and for all."

Walsh exhaled slowly. "There would be no point. The city has to see it happen. They need to see the Sonichu brats die. And if Ledger's team makes it out of here alive, I intend to keep the promise I made to them back in January. Mark my words, the family will die. Just…not yet."

"It's Morrison's team now," Gee reminded her. "But as long as we're on the subject of Ledger, I sent those new chemical samples to the Library for analysis. Ledger's research team was able to isolate a certain reactant in the mixture that wasn't there before. Mary, something's been added."

"Why, Vivian," sighed the PVCC commander, "did you wait until the worst possible moment to tell me this?" She glanced at the paper. "We'll talk about this later. For now, get to Wilderness."

"You should come too." The Miscreant looked over her shoulder worriedly as she stepped toward the door to the main hallway of Menchi-Nasu. "Mary…what about…"

Walsh's jaw was set. "I'll handle it. Just get out of here. Be safe, Vivian."

"You too, Mary," Gee replied, and hurried out of the room. "Both of you."

The door slammed. Walsh stood watching the aerial view from the Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede drone for another few moments, then sank into her chair. She knew that every second mattered to the evacuees, but at the moment, if the PVCC was to succeed, she needed to stay back, out of sight, as bait to lure the unsuspecting Chandler to his inevitable doom. If all went as planned, the city could very well find itself without a mayor before the sun set.

An electronic alert beeped on the side of the screen, heralding a call from Jason Kendrick Howell at the 4-cent_garbage HQ. Surprised, Walsh picked up her remote and pressed the ACCEPT button. A window immediately popped up, displaying the administrator on his throne, as usual.

"We've got a problem, Mary," Howell spoke, and for the first time in her life, Walsh detected a heavy hint of uncertainty in his voice. "We were wrong. He's not going for Menchi-Nasu first."

---

Menchi-Nasu, southern gate, 2:16 p.m.

"BACK! BACK TO THE SECOND LINE!" roared Steve, unloading an incendiary round from Origin into a Sonichu's face before it could fire off a Thundershock. The chu's pained scream was immediately cut short when its head exploded in a blistering fireball, but the Manajerk was already on the move. As more and more of the EHPF infantry zoomed toward the Jerkop lines, Kevin and Allie sprinted after Steve, keeping as low to the ground as they possibly could while Matt and Serge carried Baba Yaga back toward the second line of sandbags and barricades.

Kevin leapt over the next barricade just in time to avoid being hit by a vicious arc of electricity, then turned and helped Allie over as Steve reloaded his XM8. The Manajerk only seemed to have a pair of magazines left, and after those had been expended, he would be down to Origin and his kukri. Further up the line, Zoey and Kuri were helping three Tomgirls suppress the main attack force of EHPF. Through the chaotic din of gunfire and searing electric bolts, the echoing reports of Nate's Barrett rang out like thunderclaps, as the sniper picked off the Sonichus one by one. So far, he hadn't missed a single target.

"Anyone hurt?" yelled Jexis concernedly as she hurried over, firing off bursts from her MP5 into the spiky yellow horde. "Guys, we're running out of ammo! Save your shots!"

"Do not tell Serge to save Baba Yaga's wrath, tiny doctor girl!" snarled Serge, and slammed the minigun's tripod down behind the sandbags. With Matt's assistance, he had the massive six-barreled weapon mounted up in a matter of seconds. "BABA YAGA HAS NO PUNY LIMITS!"

"Just watch your ammo, Serge!" Matt shouted. "Kevin, how many mags did you save?"

"Two full, one on its way out!" Kevin hastily shoved Allie out of the way and sent a five-round burst tearing through a Sonichu's head and neck before the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon could shock her to death. The AK-47 clicked ominously. "One out! I'm down to my last two mags!"

The first line had fallen, and now the EHPF were swarming and leaping over it, straight into the second wave of fire from the PVCC. Even as the dead chus piled up across the southern gate and the battlefield, the horde continued to bring up fresh troops to take the places of their fallen. The Jerkops, on the other hand, were not nearly as blessed to have expendable soldiers, and each man and woman that fell to the chus was another crippling blow to the defense. Little by little, they were being worn down and battered apart. Fatigue began to set in, followed by fatal mistakes.

Kevin knew it wouldn't last. Even with enough firepower to take down Momma herself, Menchi-Nasu's defenders simply could not even make a dent in the massive army of Sonichus attacking from the south. By now only a few hundred EHPF were down, and their numbers just kept on growing no matter how many bullets and grenades the PVCC threw at them. The only advantage they held besides their reinforced position was the element of surprise, which had come in handy during the initial Non-Human Flying Human Sonee Centipede suicide bomber attack.

But as the Jerkops would soon discover, their foes had several surprises of their own.

An ominously low rumbling sounded from beyond the south gate, followed by an immense and earsplitting shriek of metal and showers of sparks as something smashed its way into the left side of the gateway and through the fortified outer walls of Menchi-Nasu. Their engines roaring violently, the forward prows of two armored transport trucks peeled straight through the barrier, opening up a pair of new passages for the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon assault force. But what new horrors emerged from the hole were nothing like what the Jerkops had been expecting.

Two platoons of thirty Sonichus, all clad from headspikes to sneakers in custom-forged composite armor of Kevlar and steel, spilled forth from the cloud of smoke filling the breach and, unable to gain enough speed for Spin Dashes under the weight of their reinforced plating, began making their way on foot across the battlefield and toward the PVCC defenders. Kevin swung his AK toward the approaching chus and fired a tentative burst into the nearest one's chest, but to his immense surprise, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon merely stumbled backward a few steps, its breastplate scratched from where the bullets had ricocheted off. Undaunted, it raised an arm and channeled a searing Thundershock from one of the copper coils built into its gauntlets, striking the barricade and nearly killing the two Red Devils firing from behind it.

"What the fuck are those?" yelled Allie, quickly torching a chu before it could reach the line.

"Looks like the Combo made themselves some shock troops," Steve snarled, unaware of the horrible pun he had just created. "Arceus, this is gonna hurt. Serge, give 'em a taste of Baba!"

"AT LAST!" the huge Russian laughed insanely, and swiveled the minigun to face the oncoming elites. "SHOCK-PIG OPPONENTS WORTHY OF SERGE!"

Baba Yaga roared like a demon as Serge opened fire, spraying heavy bullets straight into the first group of heavy assault Sonichus while the other Honey Badgers focused their fire on repelling the main charge. Kevin nearly cheered with glee and relief as three of the armored Electric Hedgehog Pokémon fell at once, their bodies pulverized within their steel shells by the sheer concussive force of a sustained .50 caliber barrage. Magi-Chan must have had a hand in the training of the elite soldiers, though, because rather than attempting a heroic charge straight into the meat grinder of Baba Yaga, the Sonichus split up and dashed forward, forcing Serge to concentrate his fire on one at a time.

With a loud whoosh, an RPG round sailed overhead, trailing smoke as it curved down into one of the armored chus and blasted it into a scything storm of red-hot metal and bloody meat. Looking back, Kevin was relieved to see that several of the Jerkops in the third line had made their way up onto the beds of a few support trucks, and were now launching an explosive retaliation at the heavy chu infantry from their elevated firing platforms. For a moment, it seemed as if the PVCC would actually be able to hold off the coming storm of steel and lightning.

Then the EHPF's air support arrived.

"INCOMING!" screamed Kacey. "ONE O' CLOCK HIGH!" Hastily swapping her megaphone for her M4, she raised the weapon to her shoulder and opened fire as something large and white hurtled down from above toward the besieged high school. Before the Jerkop defenders could react, Angelica Rosechu was upon the third line in a swirling, slashing fury, carving her way through three operatives and decapitating two more with a scything Steel Wing attack. Panicked gunfire from Kacey and the adjacent Jerkops drove back the white-furred Rosechu momentarily, but in the chaos, the EHPF ground troops seized the opportunity, and surged forward once more.

Kevin coughed through the smoke, frantically fumbling to insert a final magazine into his AK-47. His arms were nearly numb, and the new threats from above and below weren't doing anything good for morale. Looking around, he could see Kuri dashing back alone toward the third line, yelling a furious battle cry as she fired her P90 up at the circling white Rosechu. Zoey, Jexis, and Nate were falling back too, along with several dozen other Jerkops who had witnessed the attack. A sick surge of desperation swept through Kevin's gut as he realized the end had just begun. Menchi-Nasu was doomed to fall from the start, but now that the Combo were arriving…

"Pack it up!" shouted Steve as he clapped a hand to the radio headset in his ear. Around him, the other Jerkops were retreating, pulling away from the second line as they kept up a steady base of fire on the EHPF infantry. "Honey Badgers, back to the garage! We did it! We're out of here!"

"Fucking FINALLY!" Matt emptied a last burst of shells into a pair of charging Sonichus and helped Serge detach Baba Yaga from its tripod. The Russian Jerkop continued firing on the elite armored chus, making his way backward step by step as Thundershocks seared past his chest and head. Shouldering Trogdor, Allie drew her pistol and began firing blindly into the surging horde of Sonichus, many of whom had begun to trip over the bodies of their comrades that covered the battlefield. If anything, the last stand of Menchi-Nasu had not been in vain at all. Nearly four hundred dead chus lay scattered across the street, clogging the gateway and the main approach.

His last magazine empty, Kevin wrenched it out and slung the AK-47 over his shoulder, then drew his pistol and began firing alongside Allie and Steve. Fresh PVCC troops poured out of the garage to engage the oncoming chus, allowing the battered defenders to extract as many of their dead and wounded comrades as possible back to the safety of the garage. Foot by foot, bullet by bullet, the Honey Badgers fell back as a trio of S.A.V.s roared out from Menchi-Nasu and reconfigured into mech mode, adding some much-needed heavy autocannon fire to the frenzy.

"Goddamn, that was too fucking close!" yelled Nate as Steve and Zoey's teams regrouped inside the massive garage. Most of the Punislav transports had already left for Wilderness, ChinaTown, and Slumberland, but a handful of the brown Transformers and several pickup trucks and vans remained parked and idle, along with the Battle Bus. Around them, the other Jerkops who had retreated were grabbing additional ammunition, tending to their wounded, or else shouting to their comrades, no doubt relieved to have survived such a vicious assault.

Steve reached up and wrenched off his gas mask, wincing in pain. "AAGH! Son of a bitch, I think I got clipped by shrapnel! Jexis, check my back, upper right side! FUCK! FUCK!"

"You're good!" announced the medic as she grabbed the Manajerk's shoulder and pulled back. "Tendon injury! You gotta stop firing such long bursts – that XM8's gonna dislocate your arm!"

"Bite me," snapped Steve. "Zo, Kevin, we're getting the fuck out of here. Head for the armory and get everyone rearmed, then put Nick in the Battle Bus. I need to take care of one last errand." Tossing the XM8 to Jexis, he turned toward the nearest door to the main hallway.

"Wait, what?" Zoey hurried forward and grabbed the Manajerk's arm. "Errand? What errand?"

Steve stared at his squad leader in disbelief. "You think I'd forget about Sugar?"

"Morrison! Stop!"

Kevin looked toward the source of the call to see Mary Lee Walsh herself hurrying across the garage to the Honey Badgers. Her standard casual outfit had been replaced by a flak jacket and purple tank top with a pair of black combat pants. If not for her red horned headband and devil tail belt tassel, as well as the fact that Sugarplum Fury was trotting after her on a leash, he might have mistaken the PVCC supreme commander for just another operative.

"Commander Walsh!" Steve snapped to attention and saluted, as did Zoey, Kevin, and the rest of the Honey Badgers.

"At ease," Walsh ordered, and handed him the leash. "I don't want to have to delay the evacuation any more than I have to, but I'm afraid that I require one final task from your squad."

Kevin blinked in surprise, but held his tongue. This was not the time for questions.

"You're the only squad left with a transport large enough to carry additional passengers," the former dean explained hastily. "I have two high-value targets for you to escort to Slumberland. The first you already know – that mercenary you picked up at Tripod, Waters. As for the other, well…" She paused. "Morrison, may I speak with you and your squad leaders in private?"

"Yes, commander," replied Steve, and turned to the other Badgers as Sugar bounded up the stairs of the Battle Bus, terrified by the loud explosions from outside. "Kuri, you're in charge. Split up the squad and get everything loaded into the Bus. Matt, I want her ready to go ASAP, okay?"

Matt and Kuri nodded and immediately set to work assigning jobs to the other Jerkops, while Kevin, Zoey, and Steve dashed after Walsh. Outside, the battle raged on as more and more of the Transformers arrived on the scene to reinforce their comrades. Faced with an enemy that not even the elite armored Sonichus could take down, the EHPF had no choice but to continue their relentless attack and hope that Angelica Rosechu would take out the robotic support units soon.

"Only a few people know about what I'm going to show you," Walsh stated bluntly, her eyes narrowed to intense crimson slits as she led the three Honey Badgers through the command and control room and into the administrator meeting room. "As of this moment, you are not to speak of this to anyone, not even your own squadmates. If anything happens to him, anything at all…"

"What are you talking about?" Zoey asked in confusion. "If anything happens to who?"

"Mom?" a small voice sounded from Walsh's office.

As Kevin looked on in astonishment, a little blond-haired boy who looked to be no older than eight stepped through the door, his eyes wide and a look of innocent confusion on his face. There was something unsettling about the child's stare, but the Jerkop couldn't quite figure out what that was…until the boy took another few steps forward, revealing two deeply crimson irises.

"Say hello, Marty," the PVCC commander instructed in an unfamiliar, strangely tender voice.

"Hi," the boy addressed the Jerkops nervously. "Mom, who are they? Why do I have to leave?"

"Because if the chus find you, honey, they'll take you away and lock you up in CWCville Penn forever and ever," Walsh continued. She knelt down and kissed the child on his forehead, then looked back at the stunned Honey Badgers. "I suppose I owe you an explanation, Morrison."

"Yes," breathed Steve, his face blank. "You do, commander."

"You'll have to wait," said Walsh. "It's a long story." She gazed at the Manajerk pleadingly, but firmly. "I just heard from Jason. Chandler's arrived in Tennessee, and I have a feeling I know who he's going after next. I'm entrusting you with my son, Morrison. Make sure he reaches Slumberland alive, and I swear, I'll do everything in my power to get your squad into 14 Brunchville Lane tonight. You kill those little brats, and you make them scream for their daddy."

Kevin couldn't believe what he was hearing, yet the truth stood scared and trembling before him. Not only did Mary Lee Walsh have a child, an actual child, she had kept him a secret from the rest of the entire PVCC administration. Kevin didn't know how the boy had been able to hide for so long without rousing suspicion, but he had a sneaking suspicion that Graduon was involved.

"Slaweel," the spirit's voice sounded inside his head. "Slaweel, what are you doing?"

"Mom?" Marty asked softly, hugging Walsh's waist. "You're going to Slumberland too, right?"

"I have business with the Mayor, sweetheart," the PVCC commander answered, and stroked her son's hair. Kevin noticed, with a great amount of surprise, that two tiny red stubs protruded from the blond boy's head, like a smaller version of Walsh's horned hairband. Before he could wonder any further as to what in Arceus's name was going on, Graduon's voice was back in his head.

"Give him to these fools, Slaweel, and you destroy your last chance of survival. Either you both live, or you send him to his death and I take you as a vessel instead. We had an agreement!"

"My decision is final." Walsh's response was meant for both the spirit and the Honey Badgers. "I'm trusting you, Morrison. Don't let me down." She looked down at Marty, picked him up, and hugged him close, rocking the child back and forth as he whimpered and held back tears. "Don't worry, Marty. Nothing's going to happen to Mommy. I'll see you later. Be a good Jerkop."

"You too…" Marty sniffed. "Bye, Mom. Kick that fat fuck's virgin butt."

Zoey and Kevin drew back, astonished by the barrage of foul language from such an innocent-looking child. Steve couldn't help but let out a sudden laugh that startled Marty, then quickly shut up and grinned at the little blond boy. "You ever been on a school bus before, Marty?"

Marty shook his head as Walsh guided him over to the trio of Honey Badgers. Kissing her son on the forehead one final time, she nodded to Steve. "Go. Get him out of here…and be safe."

---

Menchi-Nasu, garage, 2:27 p.m.

"Is that it? Everyone ready to go?" Matt turned and looked over his shoulder, silently counting off all of the assembled Honey Badgers – Sugarplum Fury included - that were seated in the Battle Bus. "All right, that's it! Once they get back, we're pulling out of here, got it?"

"Got it!" Nate shouted just as the steel husk of a destroyed S.A.V. skidded across the concrete into the garage and collapsed in a blazing heap. Leaning over the back of his seat, he reached out and adjusted the damp washcloth that had been draped across Nick's forehead. The sniper lay on his back on one of the two medical cots in the back of the Battle Bus, his chest wrapped in bandages and a rubber breathing tube running out of the side of his mouth to a small tank of air. "It's gonna be okay, buddy. Hey. How you feeling?"

Nick shook his head weakly. He couldn't even speak without enduring massive amounts of pain, and the wound in his lung wasn't exactly helping his attitude. Most of the Honey Badgers were just amazed that the Jerkop was still alive after taking a heavy-caliber sniper round to the chest.

"So, back to Slumberland, then?" Jexis laughed nervously, shifting around in her seat as Matt turned the ignition and started up the bus. "Wow…heh…I can't believe we're finally going back there! Think they'll give us our old barracks back?"

"I wouldn't call it impossible." Allie glanced out the window. "Hey, they're coming back!"

"Who is tiny blond child?" Serge grunted in surprise.

"Okay, we all set?" asked Steve, and helped Marty up the stairs and into the bus. The young boy had been supplied with a baseball cap to hide his undeveloped - yet otherwise noticeable - horns. "Everyone, this is Marty. Security found him wandering around the streets earlier this morning – Walsh wants us to take him to Slumberland, away from the fighting."

"Sounds good." Matt closed the doors after Kevin and Ben entered, the latter of whom had been handcuffed to prevent any escape attempts. While the information he'd given the administrators had been correct and might very well have saved dozens of lives, they still weren't about to take any chances with the former mercenary soldier. "All right, that's it! We're out of here!"

"About time, too," added Zoey, and sank into the cot next to Nick. "Marty, come sit in the back with me. I'll introduce you to everyone, okay?"

"Okay," Marty replied shyly, and followed her down the aisle to the rear of the Battle Bus. Sugar sniffed his foot, bristled up briefly, then trotted after the little boy, eager to find out more about this new passenger. She only spared a look of utter contempt for Ben, as well as a growl.

"Sit down," Kevin ordered, and pushed the handcuffed loyalist into a seat just in front of Zoey. "Don't try anything stupid. As far as we're concerned, you're still a merc spy."

Ben didn't attempt to retort, but instead sighed and slumped back in his seat.

"I know you're all angry with me," he mumbled. "You need a scapegoat for all the horrible shit my friends and I put you through. But I don't want to do that anymore, and I swear on Arceus's mane, I'm going to prove it to your administrators. Just give me a chance."

"That isn't for us to decide," snapped Zoey coldly, then reached down and picked up Sugar. "Hey Marty, this is a honey badger! Her name's Sugar! Want to pet her?"

"Does she bite?" asked Marty, warily reaching out toward the honey badger as she bristled up.

"No, sweetie, she won't bite you," the squad leader said reassuringly. "Go ahead."

"Right. Matt, get us out of here before they bring this whole fucking place down!" ordered Steve from his seat in the front of the Battle Bus. "Kuri, Serge, Allie, Kevin, get to your stations and be ready to open fire once we hit the south approach!" He leaned toward his shoulder and clicked the button on his walkie-talkie. "Joe, you still there? Everything okay?"

"Yeah, we're still here, Honey Badger Command," Joe responded, though his voice was almost indistinguishable through a heavy layer of static. "We're on the move through Upper Central, just about to pass under the freeway. No sign of merc activity out here, but watch your step. You're clear to go anytime you want, but I'd suggest that you leave IMMEDIATELY!"

"Duly noted," replied Steve, and grabbed his XM8. "FLOOR IT, MATT!"

The Battle Bus's engine let out a rumbling roar as Matt stomped on the accelerator as hard as he could. A grimy puff of smoke spewed from the exhaust pipe, and with a squeal of tires on concrete, the armored vehicle shot forward through the open garage door, almost immediately flattening one of the elite Sonichus who had been firing concentrated Thundershocks up at the S.A.V. units. There was a loud clang as the front-mounted battering ram collided with the unsuspecting chu, and a few droplets of blood splashed across the windshield.

"FIRE!" yelled Zoey, and cupped her hands over the little boy's ears. "Don't watch, Marty!"

Kevin rose from his seat and grabbed hold of the rear SAW turret with both of his hands. Swinging it to the left as the Battle Bus wheeled around and roared off toward the eastern gate, he squeezed the trigger and was once again rewarded with a shuddering backlash the likes of which left his arms nearly numb from the elbow down. Forcing himself to keep the machine gun aimed toward the mass of yellow shapes, he swiveled the turret back and forth while Nate climbed the ladder and began taking potshots at the EHPF infantry from up on the top deck.

Upon noticing the monstrous yellow behemoth barreling towards them, most of the Sonichus immediately fired Thundershocks and other electrical attacks straight into its forward hull, not even bothering to try moving out of the way first. Rolling his eyes, Matt twisted the steering wheel, gritted his teeth, and braked, hard. Instantly, a cloud of white smoke billowed from all four of the Battle Bus's tires as the vehicle slid, unbelievably, into a screeching drift. Fighting to keep control of the armored school bus, the Jerkop braced himself against the floor with one foot not a moment too soon. The group of foolishly brave chus were smashed flat against the concrete, plowed into a broken mess of ragged yellow spikes, shattered bones, and shredded meat. Blood splattered the windows on the right side of the bus, forcing Allie to keep firing her SAW blindly into the crowd. The Jerkops on the ground had all been replaced by Transformers to hold the southern approach, so she didn't have to worry about any friendly fire problems.

"Cease fire! CEASE FIRE!" Steve shouted over the thunderous roar of the Battle Bus's machine guns, the Barrett, and Baba Yaga. "Okay, we're clear! Gate's open, take us through!"

The Battle Bus roared through the gateway and into the streets of CWCville, swinging around toward the south as more PVCC trucks and Jeeps zoomed past on their way to the various HQs located around CWCville. His arms still shaking, Kevin crashed back into the seat next to Ben and exhaled in relief, glad to finally be finished with the nightmarish machine gun again. Every time he had to use it, he felt like it was going to break his arms.

"You're standing up way too straight," commented the mercenary prisoner. "Lean forward and grip it hard so your arms don't shake. That way, your body diverts all the recoil into the floor."

Kevin glanced at him. "Uh…thanks."

"No problem," said Ben, and leaned back. "What was your name again?"

"Kevin," replied the Jerkop. "Look, you helped us out, and I'm grateful for that, but just sit still and do what we say. If you're lucky, Walsh might let you work in the Slumberland cafeteria."

"No." Ben shook his head. "No, I'm not going to let them just push me out of the way like that."

"You'll take what you're given, and you won't give the administrators any trouble about it." Kevin looked up towards the front of the bus, where Kuri, Nate, and Allie were sitting together and discussing something while Steve sat alone, conversing with Joe on the radio. The Honey Badgers looked absolutely worn out, and he was just glad that the squad hadn't sustained anything worse than Nick's punctured lung.

"He's doing fine," reported Jexis. "I'm gonna give Steve an update. Keep an eye on him, okay?"

Kevin nodded and glanced out the rear window as the medic hurried past Zoey and Marty to the front of the Battle Bus. Only a few other PVCC vehicles were following them: two small trucks, a Humvee, a van, and a Punislav…

…wait, where did we get a Hummer? Kevin thought to himself in confusion as he stood up and stepped over to the SAW turret to get a better look. Either one of the Menchi-Nasu Jerkop squads had managed to perform grand theft auto on a loyalist vehicle, or else it was a-

BOOM! The foremost truck spun to the right, nearly spinning out of control as a barrage of SMG fire impacted along its side and popped one of its front tires. Reflexively seizing the machine gun's grip again, Kevin swung it up and opened fire, startling Zoey, Marty, Sugar, and Ben. The SAW roared in his arms, spraying heavy bullets into the loyalist Humvee as it swerved back and forth like a rabbit dodging a fox, expertly avoiding the majority of his fire.

"KEVIN! KEVIN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" yelled Steve.

"LOYALIST HUMMER!" Zoey shouted as she leapt to her feet and grabbed hold of Marty. "STEVE, GET MARTY TO THE FRONT OF THE BUS!"

His heart pounding louder than a bass drum, Kevin could only watch in utter horror as a second Humvee swung into the street from an adjacent alley, revealing a female mercenary gripping a thick metal tube against her shoulder. As he planted his feet and swung the SAW around to intercept the oncoming vehicle, a puff of smoke burst from the end of the tube, then rapidly grew into a grey spear that lanced forward down the street and buried itself into the rear of the Battle Bus, just below where Kevin was standing.

Time froze for a split second. Then the world turned to fire.

---

?

"Told you we'd meet again, didn't I? Finally got another chance at that yellow piece of skítu."

"That you did, Goody. Looks like he's up. Wakey wakey, sunshine."

WHUMP! Kevin's eyes snapped open as the hard barrel of an M16 drove into his abdomen, immediately knocking the remaining breath out of his lungs and awakening him from his post-traumatic stupor. A thundering pain surged through his head, stemming from the spot where a jagged shard from the Battle Bus's window had embedded itself into his left temple.

Two loyalist soldiers stood looking down upon him with distaste: a bearded man with black hair and an old battle scar in the middle of his forehead, and a viciously calm silver-blonde-haired Scandinavian woman. Both of the mercenaries had their weapons trained on Kevin, though the woman kept stealing glances toward the other four bodies lying around him in case Zoey, Nick, Ben, or Marty regained consciousness. The Battle Bus was nowhere in sight, but in the distance, Kevin could hear the sharp reports of gunfire echoing through the streets. His wrists were locked together by handcuffs, and the backs of his shirt and pants were dirty and scratched, indicating that he and his comrades had been hurled out of the bus and into the street by the explosion.

Dizzily, Kevin pushed himself off the ground, his head spinning. Without warning, the female merc knelt down and punched him square in the jaw, slamming him down against the asphalt hard enough to nearly knock the Jerkop unconscious again. Stars exploded in front of his eyes, bursting and reforming over and over again as he coughed and writhed in immense pain.

"Did I say you could get up, little rebel?" the loyalist sneered mockingly. "Don't you know who I am, little rebel? You don't have any fucking idea how long we've been following you and your friends, do you?" She inhaled deeply. "It's gonna be a cold one tonight. Not as cold as home, but pretty close. Of course, they don't need to worry about the cold. All that fat…it's like a jacket."

"Goo-goo? Sonee!" A single Sonee plopped down from the top of a trash can it had been rooting around in and waddled toward Nick's body with a gleeful "YAY!", licking its harelips excitedly. Without a word, the bearded mercenary casually walked over to the feral baby chu, raised a boot, and brought it down right on top of the Sonee's fuzzy, bulbous head. The tiny Electric Hedgehog Pokémon died with a piercing squeal and a sloppy crunch, its brain liquefied and its organs spilling out in slippery coils from its plump belly. Wiping the sticky red mess off on the sidewalk, the loyalist turned back to Kevin and smiled condescendingly.

"Pathetic," he muttered. "That's what they are, really. Larvae. Primordial, underdeveloped, and hideous parasites that are easily crushed by one's feet. Easy to find…easy to kill, not so easy to wipe out. You, on the other hand…" Stowing the M16 on his back, the soldier reached for his belt and drew a wicked-looking combat knife, then placed the tip beneath Kevin's jaw and tilted his head up. "You…you're the opposite. Hard to find. Hard to kill. But you…you don't breed as fast, do you? You don't spend half the day fucking as many pretty girls as possible, do you?"

The knife withdrew, and Kevin at last was allowed to relax. The mercenary's voice was almost impossible to hear over the frantic pounding of his own heart and the pain in his skull. Somehow, every word echoed in the Jerkop's head like the tolling of a great bell, sending fresh waves of fear and pain through his bruised body. He pulled at the cuffs, but they wouldn't loosen or break.

"Stay still or you get another," the woman ordered, kissing her knuckles sadistically. "And don't tempt me, hálfviti. I don't like hitting little boys who can't fight back. Bad karma, am I right?"

"Absolutely, Goody," replied the bearded man, and winked at Kevin. "Now then, don't bother hoping for some kind of last-minute rescue. Junior's leading the rest of your friends on a little detour. He certainly loves a good car chase, that man." He glanced toward the crushed body of the Sonee he had just killed, and a thin smile spread across his face as more of the little fuzzy pink and yellow blobs squirmed their way out of the surrounding garbage cans, dumpsters, air ducts, and other containers and passageways. "Well well, and here I thought we'd have to wait a little longer. Not anymore. We've got all the time in the world, son. All the time in the world…"

"Sonee! Goo-gee!"

"YAY! Gaa-gaa! Wosey!"

"Sonee! Hee hee hee! YAY!"

"Tee hee! YAY! Seeeeeeee!"

"Oh, God," gasped Kevin as realization pounded into him with the force of a piledriver. The mercenaries hadn't just meant to kill him and his squadmates. They had brought the Honey Badgers right into the middle of the abandoned zone. Right to a Feeding Day drop site.

And the lunch guests had just arrived.