~ Chapter 3 - Disappointment ~

This morning wasn't like any other. Before Ichigo had woken from his very light slumber, Kariya had rose and left the house. The kitchen wore the same appearance as it had been left the night before. The only difference was the shattered mirror in the bathroom. Kariya must have been quite angry to choose to do that. Ichigo cleaned the mess in the kitchen and took care of the glass shards. If he didn't, no one would.

He continued his cleaning in the bathroom and loaded the washer machine with dirty clothes from the hamper. He picked up one of Kariya's white dress shirts from it but hesitated to put the shirt in the machine. Should he really do all this? The whole situation between him and Kariya was getting worse. The shirt was brought up to his face. Kariya still used the cologne he had gotten from Ichigo on his birthday, and Ichigo loved the brand. A sigh escaped Ichigo's lips. He tried to make his heart feel hatred against Kariya, but it made him realize that he still loved him deep inside. After the machine had been put on, Ichigo searched for his Iphone. The urge to call his boyfriend was strong. He felt that he needed to sort things out before the man got home. Kariya picked up on the other end but didn't say anything.

"Kariya-san?.. Ehh, well it's me."

"Obviously." His boyfriend said.

"I was wondering if you are coming home after work? I-I thought that we could spend some time together, since things have been… uhm.., not that good." Ichigo tried really hard to make his point without sounding so hesitant.

There was a long silence and a sigh before Kariya spoke. "I can agree that things have been strange lately. I'll see you at home."

A click was heard and Kariya hung up. The man was still a little bit mad, definitely.

Ichigo sat down on the sofa to make his English homework. This day in the week was usually the only one he had time to do it. It sucked to only be able to write it on one day, especially if the homework was a little hard to understand, but he usually managed. He had known this from the start anyway, and he had taken that class for so long now that he was used to the short amount of time. Ichigo did this for fun as well, which made it easier to bare. Shinji on the other hand went because of his job. The blonde's English knowledge made him easier to work with any customer walking in to the agency. Many people would raise their brows at what Shinji was working as, Ichigo had done exact the same thing when he first had been told. He was applied by the best gay escort agency in Japan, Orchid. Shinji wasn't just special in his language skill. Many escorts behaved like a seme-seme or seme-uke, they take the initiative for the 'date' and make sure that the client gets all the attention needed, but if the client gets a happy ending, the escorts end up being the top or the bottom. Shinji however is different; his trademark is to be uke-uke. The client takes him out, takes the initiative himself and in a happy ending scenario, the client is topping. It's rare for an escort to be this dismissive, that many clients turned to Shinji's agency asking specially for him. Renji's reason to take English is to become a pro at football. He got a long way to go and learning English is a step in the right direction. Ichigo was jealous at his friends; they have goals or reasons to learn a second language, while he only does it to pass the time and to get away from the house. It must feel great to have a goal in life, something to work for. As it was now, he lived on his partner's money, many people's dream, but it wasn't something to be proud of.

Ichigo finished the homework quickly and was actually starving. He threw together a lunch, which was devoured quickly. The laundry was done and Ichigo threw it all in to the dry tumbler on low heat so that nothing would shrink. He went back to the kitchen and washed his dishes. He took out his phone from his back pocket and searched through his contacts after Urahara's number. After finding it he pressed 'dial' and brought the phone to his ear.

"Urahara's shop." A sing song voice said on the receiver's end.

"It's Ichigo. I, uhm, wonder if I can work for three hours or so today?"

"Perfect timing! I was on my way to call you actually. I have a thing I need to collect before the sun sets. I will give you the details when you get here."

"Oh, then I'll see you in a bit! Bye."

Before going to the shop, Ichigo hang the almost dry clothes and removed all the fluff from the drier's filter. Changing to a more respectable outfit would be a good idea before leaving. A fresh slim V-neck t-shirt in white replaced the plain t-shirt he had worn during the morning. A quick look in the mirror before going out through the door and Ichigo was on his way. He felt happy but at the same time nervous. This was his first job since graduating and he wanted to impress as much as possible. If Urahara liked his efforts maybe this would open a door to something better in the future? Rely on Kariya for all eternity was out of the question. He needed this in many ways.

The automatic sliding doors to the shop opened, followed with a tune signaling a new customer. Urahara walked out from the back of the small shop as he was noticed of the new costumer. The orangette walked in with confidence, both in his eyes and pace.

"Kurosaki- san! Are you ready to do some work?"

"As ready as I can get."

"Good, good. It's very simple, just take payment and make sure everything looks good in the store and it will be a piece of cake."

"You can count on me. The shop will be safe in my hands."

"How do you want to receive payment for your hours?"

Ichigo scratched his head as he gave it a thought. "If it's okay with you, I was thinking of letting you keep it till' I need it."

"Then it's settled. I will return in a few hours, until then, have fun~."

Ten minutes went after Urahara's departure and not a single costumer. Ichigo stared around in the little shop for awhile before he decided that he dared to leave the cash register. He strolled around in the shop to check if anything was out of place. Nothing was, to his disappointment.

After what seemed to be a whole year, which only was 1 hour, Ichigo's first costumer entered the shop. "Welcome!" He gladly greeted the costumer. It was an old lady and her grandchild that had entered the shop. The kid was only 4 years old at the most, and had his eye's dead set on the ice cream box in front of the counter. It was just a matter of seconds now…

"Pleeeeease grandma! Can I please have an ice cream?"

He was ignored while the older woman walked around the store to retrieve a packet of tea, plums, some biscuits and a crossword paper. Ichigo had to seal away a chuckle when the kid tried the puppy eye strategy which obviously didn't work, so he switched to sniffle loudly but the woman didn't budge.

"Anything else?" Ichigo asked the woman after he had scanned all of her groceries. The boy looked hopeful at his grandma. "No, that's all." She answered. The woman paid and the disappointed kid dragged his feet when they walked out of from the store. Ichigo stared at the sliding doors for a moment. He exhaled audibly and ran through the store, hoping that they hadn't gone far and they hadn't. The woman and the child was about to walk over the street when he came through the doors.

"Wait!" He shouted.

They turned around and Ichigo squatted down in front of the boy.

"Here, I'll give this to you if you promise to take care of your grandma." Ichigo held an ice cream that the boy took from his hands. The child starred at it for a second before his face lighted up and you could almost see stars twinkling in his eyes. He nodded with a big smile and was rewarded with Ichigo's hand ruffling around in his hair.

"That's a good boy." The woman and the child walked away, and Ichigo returned behind the register. He would have to remind Urahara that he had to take the cost of the ice cream away from his salary.

~~xxx~~

"I assume that everything went like it should?" Urahara wondered after his return.

"There were only a few costumers, it was mostly dead. –Oh Urahara, I gave a kid an ice cream so I need to take it of my salary."

"Sure." Urahara stared at Ichigo for a moment. "You know, if you keep giving away things, your money will disappear before you get to see them."

"I have a weak spot for kids, can't help it."

"Will I be seeing you tomorrow?"

"If my help is needed, I'm probably able."

Ichigo exited the store, and had a few hours left before Kariya would come back from work. Maybe he should head out for a run? Yeah, that would be a good idea.

Ichigo could never imagine that this 'good idea', who was currently stabbing and constricting his left lung, could turn in to an 'I wish that I never tried this stupid idea'. Seeing running people in the street made it look so easy. He hadn't gotten far on his run before a stitch had claimed his lung and forced him to walk fast instead of running. Ichigo gasped for air, while trying to calm down his pulse. Three blocks, but it felt like a freaking mile. He straightened his back and came to a complete stop. The throat was dry in a slimy way. The orangette cleared it a couple of times. A hand dug in the pocket of his hoodie to bring out the Ipod. Ichigo switched song and turned up the volume. Orange locks were hidden under the hood and his legs started to carry him home. A Linkin Park song murdered his brain, which was perfectly fine; at least he didn't have to hear his own ragged breaths. Not really thinking, more like disappearing in to the song; Ichigo took one step out on the driving lane to cross the street, only to almost be run over by a speeding car. He ripped out his ear buds and watched as the vehicle cut a corner so fast that the tires screeched at the abrupt turn. He grumbled under his breath as he, safely this time, continued to cross the road.

To his surprise, Kariya was already home when he returned. His boyfriend stood in the hallway with his arms over his chest as he wore a very annoyed expression. Ichigo put away his Ipod and took of his shoes feeling Kariya's glare going through his back.

"I've called you, why didn't you answer?"

"I was out jogging obviously."

"You're usually home, I got worried when you didn't answer."

Kariya walked after Ichigo into the house, like a beast tailing its prey. On the screen, on his Iphone, Ichigo could easily see that Kariya had called him at least fifteen times. How obsessive could a man be?

"Why are you home this early anyway?" He asked.

"I felt that I needed to give you some company."

"You have been pretty busy… " Ichigo felt a little happy that his lover had thought about him in that way.

"The companies don't run themselves."

"You're stressed out, right? So… should we just order take out and relax in front of a movie?"

This could have been a romantic late afternoon if everything had been the way it used to be. The meal was eaten in silence and Ichigo had tried his best to pick up a conversation but Kariya, if he even answered, only said a 'yes, no or mmm'. Ichigo had picked the movie and sat fairly close to his boyfriend during it. He had laughed at the funny scenes while he enjoyed the movie. Kariya had not laughed and didn't seem that interested in watching the movie at all. His own phone had his attention; in fact the damn phone had gotten more 'smiles' then Ichigo had the last couple of weeks. It was hard to admit, but he was jealous. Extremely jealous.

The movie came to an end with the credits currently rolling on the screen. Kariya didn't seem to notice though. Ichigo bent over his boyfriend and covered the phone with his hand, making Kariya let go of it. He put it down on the coffee table before turning back to his lover. Ichigo straddled Kariya's legs and started to kiss his neck. His hips bucked into the others as he traveled further. A slight nip in the ear marked the finishing line of his kissing trail.

"Kariya-san…" Ichigo whispered heatedly in the elder's ear. He gave Kariya a peck on the lips once before crashing down on them more furiously.

Everything would have been perfectly fine if the lips on his had bothered to respond. It was like kissing a dead person or an inexperienced teen. Deeply disappointed, Ichigo climbed of his boyfriend and sat down beside him. He clenched his fists on his thighs, while trying to keep the tears away. Was Kariya really not even interested in his body anymore? Had their relationship already reached that point? Kariya folded one leg over the other, not intending to say anything. Ichigo rose abruptly from the couch and opened his mouth as to say something, but when Kariya turned his head and stared back at him he closed it. He took a deep breath and tried again.

"Couldn't you at least have tried to pretend that you are interested?"

Kariya shrugged his shoulders and made to stand up.

"I mean, what. the. fuck?! Don't avoid this conversation!" Ichigo shouted. "And who told you it was okay to break the bathroom mirror first thing in the fucking morning? What's wrong with you? Are you completely out of your-"

Slap!

Ichigo brought his hand to his cheek, stunned.

"This is my house, which has my furniture. I pay it with my own, hard earned, money. Don't come and tell me what to do or not in my own home, especially when I cover your costs and make sure you have everything needed." Kariya said loud and clear only a mere inch from Ichigo's face. The boy still held his cheek, rooted to the spot. "Is that understood?" Kariya continued firmly. Ichigo made himself nod, too dazed to respond in another way. His lover left the living room, leaving Ichigo to his own fate. Ichigo felt trapped and the room suddenly got lesser air. He needed to get away from the house. Phone, keys and his jacket was the things he could find in his desperation to disappear from there. Before he knew it, he found himself sitting down on a bench further down the street. This was the end, huh? An almost perfect life, destroyed in a few minutes. His cheek still stung and he was glad it hadn't got hurt by his teeth. Puking all over Kariya because of the taste of iron wouldn't help in that situation. The orangette dialed Shinji but was met with the automatic responding voice. After ending the call he sent a text message instead.

[Need to talk to you]

No reply. Shinji usually answered immediately. He waited five more minutes before sending another one.

[Answer Shinji. It's important…]

He sat on the bench for almost an hour and the night air was quite cold against his thin jacket. He shuddered and tried to get some warmth in his chilly hands. The Iphone was held with an iron grip, afraid that he would miss a message or a call from Shinji. Unknown to Ichigo, his cell phone only had five percent battery life left when he had gotten out from the house and now slowly ticked towards zero. He stared at the phone in disbelief when it shut down and turned black. Stupid Iphones' and their short battery duration. How was he supposed to get in contact with the blond now? A new panic set in, he couldn't crawl back to his boyfriend. Their argument was still too fresh, and going back would only benefit Kariya. Ichigo could take care of himself and he would show him that he wasn't dependant.

Shinji lived closer to town than he did and Ichigo wasn't certain if the buss still was going, but he took his chances and went to the bus stop to check the timetable. To his relief, and what seemed to be the last buss for the day, stopped just as he started reading. He got on, payed the driver with money he found in his jacket pocket and took a seat at the very back of the buss. The slightly warm air gave back the warmth in his hands. He looked out through the window but was met by his own reflection caused by the light from the inside and the surrounding darkness on the outside. He let his head rest against the cool glass as he let a deep sigh escape his lips. The bus was fairly quiet, besides from someone who was currently blasting his ears with some screamo music. Ichigo was thankful for this since he was in no condition to handle drunktards. He pressed the stop button and got off on Shinji's stop. The cold hit him like a wall as his feet touched the ground. God, he missed that warm buss already. Ichigo crossed the road, walked through the small gate, and climbed the stairs to the third floor where Shinji lived. He pressed the door bell, stepped back, waited a few seconds before repeating the procedure.

Ichigo leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor. He never thought about the possibility where his friend wasn't at home or wouldn't come home for the night. All he could do now was to wait and hope for Shinji to return. He pulled his legs to his chest and hugged himself as he tried to save some of his body warmth.

~xxx~

"Shh… Don't be so loud. You will wake the neighbors."

"And since when did you decide to show respect? You're usually very loud…"

"Whatever." Then Shinji saw something that made him freeze to the ground.

"Mpf… what the fuck?! Don't just stop walking like that!" The man exclaimed as he collided into Shinji's back.

"Ichigo?" Shinji called out. He had to be sure; he couldn't believe that the orange haired man was sitting outside his apartment, and at this hour.

The boy looked up and smiled sadly. "Shinji?"

He hurried forward and knelt in front of Ichigo. "What are you doing here? Did anythin' happen?"

Ichigo nodded.

"Was it Kariya?"

Another nod.

Shinji took a closer look at Ichigo's face and frowned. "The bastard hit you?" This was more a statement, than a question. Ichigo looked down in defeat.

"Can you stand?"

"Yeah…"

Ichigo stood up stiffly, using the wall as a support. He took the set of keys from his friend's outstretched hand, taking the hint to go in first. He fumbled a bit with the key and the lock before he got the door open. Shinji made sure that Ichigo had gone inside and closed the door before he turned to his ignored companion.

"Maki, I'm sorry but I need to take care of him."

"So you're dumping me?"

"No. We have to continue on another occasion. I'll call you."

"Che."

When Shinji closed the apartment door, Ichigo had just finished taking of his shoes and jacket. He kicked off his own shoes and touched the orangette by the arm. The coolness of it surprised him.

"How long have you been out there, waiting? Yer cold as a popsicle."

"A while." Ichigo responded as he shivered from the heat in the room.

"Go an' shower, okay? I'll lend you some clothes."

Ichigo turned around and hugged Shinji desperately.

"Thank you."

"Stop beein' a wuss. Take that shower and we'll figure the rest out later."

When Ichigo stepped out from the bathroom, Shinji walked out from his small kitchen with two cups of hot tea. The blond had given him a sweater and loose comfy pants to wear. They sat down in the sofa, and Shinji put on of the steaming cups into Ichigo's hands. He took a sip while Ichigo stared down into his.

"Feeling a bit better?"

"The shower did the job."

"Wanna talk about it?"

Ouch, no beating around the bush with Shinji. Ichigo shrugged unsure if he wanted to talk about it or if he should forget and keep on living. He continued to stare into his tea. He barely noticed Shinji getting up from the couch to retrieve something from the bathroom. The tea was taken from him and put down on the coffee table. Ichigo looked up at Shinji who held a big white band aid of some sort.

"This has some medicine in it, might be good for your cheek."

Ichigo turned around to face the blond and put his legs in a tailoring position in the sofa. Shinji got the band aid on and ruffled Ichigo's orange hair into a wild mess.

"There. Now you look like a real fighter.."

After a few minutes of silence…

"Was that your boyfriend?"

"Naaah. We've been on an' off for some time now."

"Not that great in bed, huh?"

"Not one of my top five lays, so I'd say no."

Ichigo yawned and rubbed his eyes. He felt slightly brain dead from everything.

"Tired?"

"Mentally exhausted."

After a little persuasion from Shinji, Ichigo found himself cramped together with his friend on his single bed. Why someone as sexually active as Shinji, didn't have a queen sized bed was a little hard to understand.

"I know it's cramped, but it's a lot comfier this way."

"Yeah, yeah, just don't get hard from all that rubbing against me."

Shinji hugged Ichigo closer and rubbed his hand in a comforting movement. "It's okay to cry, Ichi. You shouldn't keep it pent up inside. You need to let it out."

Ichigo inhaled a shuddering breath before he started to cry his eyes out. He hoped that his friend was right because he hated this sort of pain and to let it out wasn't an easy story either.

TBC.

AN: I've decided to start posting unbetaed to be able to update faster. People don't seem to mind on 'The Fraternity Leader' so I hope no one does here either. I might go back and get it edited, depending on my beta's time.

I'm guessing you all are too excited to read this now with The 50 Shades of Grey premiere around the corner. I can't stand to hear more news about the movie. I'm not exited at all, the books were ok, but honestly I have read better fan fiction here. The only good thing about it is that the publishing of the trilogy shows that it's possible to succeed as a "hobby writer". Every one of you that writes on this site can become just as big with a little luck and courage. You are all great authors, don't forget that.

Happy Valentine,
~BIAE