"My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it." - Mark Twain

Eric frowned at the reflection glaring at him, his own. Like always, he looked like he was trying too hard. Despite how often he worked out, or preened himself, he was a big loser.

A fatass.

The door swung open, taking his image away.

"My baby!"

Eric winced as he was sucked up in a tight hug, arms as strong as steel wrapped around his sides. He struggled to pull her off of him, but each shove was futile.

"Mom!" he groaned, cheeks warming at the sound of Haley laughing from the parked car.

He should really fire her, maybe that would wipe the smirk off of her face.

"Just look at you, 'hun! You're all skin and bones!" and the next moment Eric was herded inside his old house.

"But who did you come with?" his mother giggled, eyeing the blonde that slipped in after the pair.

"Mom," Eric sighed, "this is Haley. She's my personal assistant that oversees boring aspects in my regular life, and maintaining my schedule."

"She's pretty."

"That's why he picked me." Haley joked, but it came out strained and bitter.

"Hm." Liane released her grip on her son. "Let me be the judge of that."

And true to her word, Liane Cartman circled around the young woman, face as stony as one of the mountains in the distance. Unlike the rest of her generation, she was treated well with age. She had a few grey hairs here and there, but they were pulled back in a fashionable bun, intricate and neat.

It alluded a sense of class, that the mother lacked throughout Eric's childhood. The mother he knew spent the mornings in bed watching her soaps in a house-coat, and would drink her troubles away with fruity wine coolers.

Not much changed with that growing up, but Eric had to face the world alone. To make his pay and actually keep the cheque without fear of it being spent behind his back. To do that he had to cut ties with his mother, until now.

"She's a cutie, I'll give her that. Just not as cute as I was, I could really turn some heads in my day. And I still can!" Liane ended with a dainty laugh, waving off the glare Haley sent her.

"I'm kiddin', hun!"

Leave it to my mother to upset any girl I bring home, not even a minute in the door, Cartman thought with a roll of his eyes.

"Are we going to talk or what?"

"Oh sure! I'll put something on for you to eat. We can have a chat in the living room, pumpkin." And just like that his mother was back to hanging off of him, ushering her tower of a son into the joined room.

"That won't be necessary, Ms. Cartman. I already prepared a meal for him today." Haley hurriedly said as she followed after them, glaring at the back of the older woman's head.

"That's sweet, but I know what Eric likes. And he prefers things made well done, something that was put together with thought. Okay, 'hun?"

An awkward bout of silence followed after that, leaving Haley to stand in the door-frame as Eric was seated on the well used couch.

It was bizarre, Eric sitting in the room. He had described his life to her, but to see it now was quite a contrast. The effect was doubled by the grey suit he wore, much too expensive to be used in a simple area. She hated it here, it seems that the abnormal habits the town had were gone when Eric's friends grew up. And if that was so, the sleepy town then had no use for her. She'd much rather go back to her home, empty but clean with her tiresome work.

You had to live in success, to be prepared for it.

No, she wouldn't be pushed around. Giving a sound stomp in defiance(which startled her boss), Haley headed off to the kitchen. Inside she found Eric's mother humming as she made her son lunch.

A standard sandwich with extra layers of sizzling bacon, with a bowl filled with Cheesy Poofs, and a large cup with pop. The exact type of meal that Eric struggled to get rid of, and Liane was undoing all of that work.

"Ms. Cartman," Haley greeted once more, nose twitching at the heavy scent of artificial cheese in the air. She waited until that barely wrinkled face met her own, "he won't eat that."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yes, he prefers something lighter to settle easily in his stomach. He runs a busy life."

Liane clipped the Cheesy Poofs bag shut with a clamp, then she stepped away from the counter. "Listen here, 'hun. Eric is my child, so I won't be pushed around by a common tramp."

"Excuse me?!"

"And that bad haircut isn't helping. I'm the only woman in Eric's life, so butt out." she hissed, before donning a friendly smile.

"Lunch is ready, pumpkin!" Liane sung, bringing out the meal to her only child.

Eric glanced to see his mother's excited face, arms filled with...lunch. Haley was right behind her, looking not happy in the least.

"Mom, set that down." he grumbled, taking the plate away and setting it on the coffee table. Liane peered at Haley from the corner of her eye, before she sat next to her son. Suddenly there was no more room on the couch, just like when he was younger. Or did the couch just get smaller?

"I need your help."

"I thought you said that you didn't need money?" Liane pouted. "Well let me grab my purse."

Sighing, Eric gripped his mother's arm, preventing her from getting up.

"I don't need money, Mom. Just..." Liane still remained ready to rush over to her purse. "Will you just listen to me, for one second?!"

His harsh voice had the two women in the room flinching, eyes widening in apprehension towards Eric. Palming his eyes with the heel to his hands, Eric groaned. Was everyone going to be an idiot? Was this his personal hell?

"Look..." he started again, quieter this time. "I just need a list of the men or women you've...serviced, not all of them." he added, particularly when his mother's mouth opened in protest. "Just the ones working with the mining company, I plan on taking it over."

Mulling the words over, his mother hesitated before staring dead on at him. "Alright, but I don't want this blowing up."

"Thanks, Mom. Haley give her my number."

Reaching into her pocket for a business card, the blonde glowered as she handed it over. Her mouth felt like she had bitten into a lemon to the rind, utterly disgusting.

Leaning downwards, Eric briefly kissed his mother on the forehead. With the sultry scent of perfume covering his senses, he left his mother without a goodbye. And certainly didn't reply to the calls his mother yelled out after him.

"Sir, where are you going?" Haley inquired, bumbling after his shadow.

"To a bar."

Haley snorted, "But you just had a drink!"

"Yeah, but it wasn't enough to get me drunk. Take the night off, Haley."

With the sun darkening, Eric walked alone into the orange evening. Even with the still freshness of the day, the stars begun to peek downwards on South Park. But it held no beauty for the brunette, it only cemented the cold reality of everything.

Of the knowledge of his mother's work, and the struggles with his own.

And more importantly, his hatred of this town.