Hux wasn't sure what time it was when he woke with a scream. No, they had come for him again, they were going to hurt him again. He panted in wild eyed fright as he stared around, trying to get his bearings.
Kylo lurched upright and fell off the seat he'd been sleeping on with a curse sending his mask toppling off his lap. Forgetting it he scrambled to his feet and sprinted out of the shuttle his lightsaber already ablaze. He looked around wild eyed, but there was nothing. Nothing. Shutting down the weapon he moved to the tent and knelt beside Hux. Nightmares... he knew it instinctively. Reaching out he wrapped an arm around the other man's shoulders drawing him against his chest and smoothing his hair. It didn't occur to him that this was how his mother had once soothed his own nightmares a long time ago. "It's alright... nothing is here to harm you..." he said quietly.
Hux looked up when Kylo came into the tent. Was he here to save him again? Then he remembered where they were. He leaned against Kylo's comforting warmth, trembling. He felt his trembling gradually subside and his breathing steady. Strangely, he believed Kylo. He would protect Hux. He didn't understand why, but he was too tired to figure it out. As his eyes started to close again, he grabbed Kylo's arm "Please stay," he said, then he fell asleep again.
He felt awkward laying there with the General resting half against him but he wasn't going to try to disentangle himself and risk waking the man. Laying back he closed his eyes, his fingers lightly stroking along Hux's shoulders and back making soothing circles.
When Hux woke in the morning, he knew something was different. He felt a strange weight behind him. He turned to see Kylo behind him. A few warning lights went off in his head, but not as many as before. He scooted away from Kylo, a little embarrassed at having had to have been comforted like a child. He stared at the floor, tracing patterns in the grass with his finger.
Kylo was awake and watching him having not moved since he didn't want to risk waking the man. When Hux moved away he left the tent and stretched to ease his sore muscles. "How is your leg?" he asked after a long moment of silence. It didn't seem worth it to pretend to ignore him after running to his aid the night before
Hux rose unsteadily and tested it. It still hurt to put weight on it, too much to walk, but it was better. He sank back down again. "It still hurts too much to walk," he answered. "But it's better." Hux looked down at the ground for a while, gathering up the courage to say what he felt he needed to. "Look, Ren," he started out awkwardly. "I never thanked you for... for rescuing me. So... I just wanted to say... thanks." He kept staring at the ground as he said it, not wanting to look at Kylo.
Kylo was silent staring at the embers of the dying camp fire. "Does that mean you'll stop looking at me like I'm some kind of monster?" The question was out of his mouth before he could stop it and he instantly regretted it. Grimacing he squeezed his eyes shut. Why should he care how Hux looked at him? What difference did it make? Shouldn't he crave his fear? Weak. His inner voice hissed at him. Weak. Weak. Weak. "Never mind... I... you're welcome..." he said turning away to get the General a protein bar and some water. He brought them to him silently avoiding looking at him.
That made Hux look up. His mouth was open, and he honestly wasn't sure how to respond. He could see the emotions flit across Kylo's face, and he was torn between going to him to give him a hug and scooting away further. So he settled with staying where he was, just staring at Kylo. Hux silently accepted the offerings, and avoided eye contact with Kylo as much as Kylo was with him. He unwrapped the bar and ate it slowly, mostly staring at the ground, but every once in a while glancing at Kylo.
Kylo had no appetite that morning. He felt off balance and somehow exposed. What was he thinking? He'd stolen a shuttle, defied all logic to rescue a man who despised and feared him. And for what? Raking a hand through his black hair he turned away walking back to the shuttle. He stripped off his coat and climbed back to the top of the shuttle. He had to get this thing working. He had to. Before Hux started making connections and sought to use his weakness against him. His jaw tightened as he flipped open the burned out panel and he went to work trying to tune out everything going through his mind.
Hux had done something again, he knew it when Kylo stood up abruptly and walked off to the shuttle. But this time Hux didn't know what he had done. He had been trying to thank him so their time on this place would at least be tolerable. Shrugging, and deciding he couldn't do anything about it, he continued eating his bar. He laid on his back, but this time he stared at the sky instead of the top of the tent.
Ren stared into space as he worked, muttering to himself now and then. Finally he came down for water and then lay down on the overgrown paving stones. He was tired and sore. "Why do you have to make everything so hard?" he asked, resting his arm over his eyes.
Hux heard Kylo emerge from the shuttle and watched him lay down. He crawled over to him and laid down beside him, but not quite touching, a silent apology for whatever he had done wrong. His warning lights started, but he pushed them down. He laid there next to Kylo, and had to admit it was very peaceful.
Kylo turned his head looking at him silently for a moment before he looked at the sky again watching the clouds. "You know, don't you? That's why you're acting like this. To get under my skin." He closed his eyes trying to ignore that angry voice in his mind. "Are you going to laugh at me now?"
Hux blinked at him slowly. He was confused. "Know what, Ren?" he asked. Maybe being away from the First Order had driven him crazy. He shook his head. "I don't know why I would laugh at you. I don't even know what is going on."
Kylo snorted. "You know... that's why you're taking special care to drive me crazy. You know I only rescued because I... because I..." he frowned and sat up looking down at his hands resting in his lap. I... I'm... attracted… to you. Alright." He hunched his shoulders forward waiting for the laughter.
Hux felt as though a missing piece of a puzzle had suddenly been put into place. He understood the reasons behind more of Kylo's actions now. "Oh," he simply said. Another of the warning lights went out, now that he knew the reason Kylo wanted him alive. There were still enough to make him wary, but not fearful. He sat up as well, and tentatively put a hand on Kylo's back, trying to reassure him that he wasn't going to laugh.
Kylo turned his head slightly looking at him. "You're not going to laugh at me? Call me stupid or weak?" He sounded genuinely confused. He'd never had a 'crush' before having spent all of his adolescence in training of one form or another. It was messing with him, making him feel unbalanced.
Hux shook his head. "Why would I? You're not stupid or weak." He wasn't sure how to take this news. He had to admit before this, he was attracted to Kylo too, but now he just felt wary. He wasn't sure he could trust anyone enough to have a relationship right now, even Kylo. Or especially Kylo, depending on how he looked at it.
Lowering his head he tried to hide the relief he was feeling. "That's the first compliment you've ever paid me," he said quietly. He glanced over at him. "I thought... with the way you've been cringing away from me… I thought you were afraid of me."
Hux shrugged. "Well it's true." He glanced down at the grass again. Hux flinched at Kylo's statement. He dropped his hand to his lap. "I am. I mean, I was. I mean, I guess I still am." He sighed. "It's confusing. It's gotten...better, though. I'm less scared than I was."
Kylo turned slightly to face him. "Why? You were never afraid of me before. I don't understand..." In truth he didn't understand any of it. Why he felt the way he did, why he'd acted so recklessly to save a man who didn't give a damn for him. None of it made any sense. "Why is it that saving your life has inspired a fear that all my effort before failed to? I don't... I don't understand."
Hux sighed as he tried to look through his feelings. In truth, he didn't know why he was so afraid of Kylo. "I don't think it's you," Hux said. "I just can't... I can't trust anyone after what I went through." His voice went hoarse here, and he cleared it, trying to force away the memories. "I know you probably can't understand. I must seem crazy." I probably am crazy, he thought to himself.
Kylo was silent for a moment. "They won't hurt you," he said with a sudden fierceness in his voice. He turned looking Hux square in the eye. "They will never harm you again. I swear it. I'll rip the entire Resistance apart. He swallowed lowering his head for a moment. "I don't understand this sick feeling I have... point to your enemy and I'll destroy them. Give me a planet and I'll lay it at your feet. Tell me to kneel before you and I will. I'll pledge my life to you and your service if you can just tell me what this is that feels like it's gnawing away at my insides and making me crazy," he said looking at him helplessly.
Hux felt a strange feeling in his chest as he watched Kylo's impassioned speech. One by one, his warning lights flicked off. When Kylo was done talking, Hux leaned in and kissed him. Instantly, all the warning lights were back on full-fledged. He scrambled as well as he could away from Kylo. He stopped a ways away and sat there, breathing hard, feeling the trembling of fear in his chest. That was stupid. What had he been thinking? He wanted to hit his head against the ground but he knew that wouldn't accomplish anything except giving him a headache.
Kylo was so startled by the kiss that he was just responding when Hux broke away like his lips were on fire. The knight sat there looking at him with a mixture of confusion and hurt. "I knew it..." he said softly. Hux was just messing with him. Playing with him. Using his confession against him. What the hell had he been thinking saying all those things? He swallowed thickly looking away from him and stood up. "You should rest General. I need to fix the shuttle."
Hux sat in the grass, waiting as his shaking and fear gradually subsided. He jumped when he heard Kylo's voice, but he forced himself to calm down. It was just Kylo, he told himself. He isn't going to hurt you. He sat there for a little while, gathering his courage, before crawling back into the tent. He knew he had hurt Kylo, and even though he told himself he shouldn't care he did. So he stared up at the top of the tent again and tried to let his mind go blank. It was harder than it had been before, but he managed it, slipping into the blessed nothingness within his mind.
The sun was going down when Kylo finished the repairs. Climbing down from the shuttle he double checked and then pulled onto his coat and mask. Walking to the tent he stayed several feet away. "General. The shuttle is fixed. Can you walk aboard?"
Kylo's voice pulled him out of his oblivion. He heard it distorted, knowing he had put the mask on. He tested the weight on his leg again. It would hold him, but it was extremely painful. He would have asked Kylo for help, but he didn't think that would be received well. "I can," he answered, gritting his teeth as he limped out of the tent. Hux emerged and saw that Kylo had indeed put his mask on. Hux still had his cloak wrapped around him, he hadn't taken it off since Kylo gave it to him. He considered giving it back to him, but it was so comforting to him now, he didn't know if he could.
Kylo stood aside and waited until he was aboard before following and closing the hatch. He didn't speak once they were back in the air. The shuttle was still a bit shaky but it was holding together. He briefly worried that hyperspace might rip it apart, but at the moment he might welcome being dead. The trip through didn't kill them and they landed aboard the Finalizer without incident. The ramp lowered and Ren paused glancing at him a moment then disappeared down the ramp passing the medical team that rushed in to help the General.
Hux felt a tremor of trepidation at the thought of going back to the ship. Anyone could be Resistance spies, and they would take him back to that awful cell. He almost considered telling Kylo to just leave him there, but that would be cowardly. As Kylo walked away and the medical personnel swarmed him, he began to hyperventilate and wish that Kylo would come back. He was the only one Hux at least semi-trusted. He was so worked up the medtechs had to sedate him.