A/N;; So thanks to everybody that submitted a review. Although I did realize that there wasn't as many as I expected. I'm not going to go crazy over it; I just expected a lot more since it was a very long and eventful chapter. It took me a good two weeks to completely finish it, and I'm glad that the whole waiting thing is all over. I've had this chapter done and ready for a couple of weeks now, I was just waiting for fan fiction to be working so I could submit it. A lot of you said that the last chapter made you really sad, and you're right, it is kind of where the story takes a turn. But you might want to get ready, because this chapter holds another huge turn as well. It's definitely a lot shorter than the last, but the news is even bigger than the last chapter, so just be open to anything happening. We've got the return of another character, and a huge secret that I don't think you guys saw coming. Actually, I don't think I ever saw coming up until I actually typed the words on my laptop, ha-ha. Go figure, but it's sure to be explosive.
Okay, so I think I will be the first person to say that I absolutely loved Tuesday night's episode of One Tree Hill. After I saw the whole thing, I was convinced that something's going to happen between Lucas and Brooke. Throughout the beginning, I kept on linking baby Angie's heart condition to the fact that Lucas is also suffering from HCM. It all just kind of clicked, you know? And the ending part where it showed Brooke, Lucas, and the baby all sleeping? That was kind of the last straw; the Brucas shipper in me came alive. Another part that I liked especially was when Haley was playing the piano and asked Peyton if she was in love with Lucas, or the idea of being in love with Lucas. And Peyton saying that it was a little bit of both completely made me jump around my room lol. So last Tuesday's episode is definitely one of my favorites. Jamie was also cute as hell too on his birthday. Lindsay just needs to leave. I'm tired of seeing her huge five head on the show.
Anyways, thanks so much for the reviews, please keep them coming! Enjoy and review!!
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Chapter 21;; Hello, Goodbye.
It was times like these when she knew deep down in her soul that she was a complete idiot. Before she even left her L.A apartment to arrive at a photo shoot across the country, she had failed to notice exactly where the fuck she was going. Sure, it was a long ass plane ride, but did she know where she was going? Hell no. So she continued to sit through her plane, her iPod cranked up in her ears, drinking champagne, not bothering to listen to a single thing her agent was telling her during the flight. When the plane had arrived at their destination, she had gotten off the plane, retrieved her luggage at baggage claim, and had purchased a Starbucks Frappaccino. It was only when she turned around to look for her agent that her eyes fell on the sign that read 'New Brunswick Airport,' that Rachel had realized she was on her way to Tree fucking Hill.
One of the first questions rising in her brain was why the hell hadn't she noticed it before? And after quickly throwing a bitch fit at her agent, she had been informed of this fact a week prior, but she had been too busy reading the People magazine to even notice the name. Another, why was she in Tree Hill for a photo shoot? Which again, she had been notified that Tree Hill might have been a ghost town when she was there, but it was quickly blossoming into a very successful town. And there was the fact that Tree Hill was currently where two celebrities were residing at for the time being, and Rachel knew exactly who those two people are.
But she didn't have time for that. Not yet, at least. No, she had been paraded into a limo, on her way into town, just to take a couple of snap shots at the local studio. Then she would have free time. And Rachel had to admit, Tree Hill had grew a hell of a lot since she had zoomed through it's back roads, or what was left of them.
It was a photoshoot for Vogue magazine, and apparently Amy Wintor thought it would be nice to have it all the way across the country, only to be sent up North to be used in the spread for the next issue. But what the hell did she know? She was only a model for all of her adult life. So she ran with it, but not without some eerie questions lurking.
After six hours lounging around in front of a huge white screen, Rachel was over being a mode. At least for that day. All she wanted to do was crash in her hotel room, get up in a couple of hours, and then go bar hopping. Some things had definitely never changed. But it seemed that some things did, and reading through the newspaper over the past couple of weeks had been a testament to that. It was mainly of a random and completely bizarre engagement between two people whose names started with a 'B.' Rachel nearly blew her top at the sight of the headline. But there would be time to settle that later. Right now, she had a car to catch.
Just as she was about to walk out of the building, she had to turn her head again. There, talking on his cell phone was someone who had been the object of her affections for a very short time during senior year. He had 'saved' her, and she had resorted to thinking that they would be together. Again, one of the reasons she was an idiot. He still looked the same, except a little more matured, and a lot happier. Rachel continued to standing there, waiting for him to get off the phone. She noticed he still had his wedding band on. Good sign.
He finally flipped his phone shut and turned around before abruptly stopping, face in shock by the sight of someone that had almost ruined his marriage during high school. It was a long time ago, but still, it was Rachel Gatina, and nothing about that woman was ever safe.
"Nathan Scott, it's been too long," she said, smirking. He was wearing dress pants with a blue button down shirt tucked in. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, and he wore a surprised expression on his face. It's not like she didn't expect it. After all, it had been roughly six years.
"Wow. Hey Rachel," Nathan said, still in shock at her presence.
"What? No hug hello?" she asked her face in bitch mode. Nathan chuckled before hugging her. He had to admit, it was kind of weird and awkward. Before they all had graduated from high school, they had settled things that had happened forgive and forget if you will. But once they all left for college, he kind of lost touch with Rachel, and he was guessing as did everyone else for that matter. Rachel was one of those people that would always stay the same, no matter how old they got, and Nathan wasn't sure if that was a good thing.
"Sorry, I'm just still surprised to see you. What are you doing here anyways?"
"Photoshoot for Vogue. My agent thought this was the best and fastest way to get it done with, and with being here for six hours, I'm not so sure what she meant by fast," Rachel explained. "Now what are you doing here?"
Nathan shrugged, "Photoshoot for Sports Illustrated. Even though I'm retired, they wanted to do a cover story about how my life's been going with Haley and the baby and all."
"How is Haley and the baby?" Rachel asked. Not exactly something you would think she would be asking, but it was being nice.
"They're good. She's due any day now. So how long are you in town for?"
"I don't know. Maybe a couple of days, or maybe weeks," Rachel stated.
"You know Brooke's staying over at the house too. I'm sure her and Haley would love to catch up with you if you want me to drive you over there?" Nathan asked. Now this could either do two things: one, completely blow up in his face or two, it was the right thing and they would all giggle and laugh until their sides hurt.
Rachel smiled, "I guess I can make an appearance. Haley's not still pissed at me right?"
Nathan chuckled, "Rachel that was years ago, and we already cleared that up before we all left for school."
"Yeah I know. But like you said, Haley's pregnant."
"Good point," he said, climbing into the truck, Rachel settling down in the passenger seat.
They had settled into a comfortable silence, Nathan keeping his eyes on the road, Rachel checking her Blackberry. Despite what people may have thought, Rachel knew of the word awkward, or maybe uncomfortable. And right now, she was feeling both. What did you say to someone you hadn't seen or spoken to in years? Rachel wasn't a dummy, she knew things had changed a lot in the small town, and she knew that there was a lot that she did and didn't know.
She cleared her throat, "So, how have things been going here?"
"Some days are better than others. Lately it's just been a little hectic, in the quietest of senses."
Rachel's eyebrows furrowed, "What's that supposed to mean?"
Nathan chuckled, "You'll find out soon enough."
"Uh-oh. This definitely can't be good. Should I be warned?"
"Now that we're talking about this, you just might," Nathan said, getting his words together. "Okay, so you haven't talked to anybody in like, six years, right?"
"Well, I talk to Mouth every once in awhile. I see Bevin sometimes in L.A, but other than that, no one."
"Okay, so has Mouth said anything about how things have been over here?"
Rachel shrugged, "Not really. He did mention something about Lucas and Peyton being married though. That was definitely a shocker. I'm still not over it."
"Well believe it. But it's not what you may think. They're like Deb and Dan. But yeah, Lucas turned into a complete asshole, ruining people's lives in this town just like Dan did. No one knew why, but we guessed it was because Brooke dumped him the night he had the heart attack."
"Yeah I heard about that," she mumbled, eager to hear more.
"So ever since that night, Lucas had been like this. So of course, we obviously keep in touch with Brooke, and she decides to come down here from New York so that she can be around when Haley gives birth. We're at the point now where everything happens so fast that even I'm having a hard time figuring it out. So for the quicknotes, Lucas admits his feelings to Brooke, Brooke gets pissed at him, her boyfriend Brian comes down here to spend time with her, Brooke realizes that her feelings never went away for Lucas, just in time for Brian to pop the big question. So now we're all kind of in the loop right now as of what happens next."
"Lucas always had bad timing," Rachel smiled.
Nathan scoffed, "You're telling me. So right now, we're all left wondering what the hell's going to happen. As far as we all can tell, Brooke and Brian are looking to get married within the next month or so, which means that Lucas better figure something else fast, or else he really will lose Brooke. This thing has seriously gotten way out of hand, but I've made it my mission to just stay out of it for the time being."
"Damn. So does Brooke want to be with Lucas too? Or is he just holding onto something that isn't there?"
"Oh it's there alright," Nathan said, pulling into their driveway. "But Brooke doesn't want to hurt Brian like that. You know how she is."
Rachel unbuckled her seatbelt, "Alright. Looks like I have my work cut out for me. Although I do have a lot of insults in mind."
"I don't think that will be a problem. They're inside," he said, the car still running.
"Aren't you going to come in?" Rachel asked.
Nathan chuckled, "And listen to you guys? No thanks. I got to go talk to Lucas. Something tells me he talked to Brooke."
"Didn't you just say you were trying to stay out of this?"
"Yeah, well, this is an exception."
"If you say so, Scott. I'll see you later." As the car sped off, Rachel was left to secretly make fun of the house. It was definitely one of those houses that you would see on Desperate Housewives. She was waiting for the golden retreiver to run out of the door and get drool on her Chanel purse. But that didn't happen, and she was thankful for that.
She turned the knob on the front door, hearing nothing but howling laughter from very two loud women. She took a look around the place, suddenly feeling like she was at home. On different shelves and on the walls were pictures of various people, mainly just Nathan and Haley with people like Brooke and the gang. There was a picture of them all at graduation, with their caps and gowns, holding their dilpomas. Rachel remembered when they all used to be happy. What ever happened to that?
Deciding that she had been quiet long enough, she poked her head into the living room, where Brooke and Haley were both of the couch, laughing at an album on Brooke's lap, and also laughing at the Friends episode that was on the television. It were times like these when Rachel didn't think she was the only stupid one in the world. What with Brookes keen sense of presence and Haley just being all around smart, she was tickled by the fact that they didn't think anyone but them two were in the house.
"What's so funny?" Rachel asked aloud, leaning against the wall. Brooke and Haley's head both snapped in the direction, their mouths hanging open.
"Oh my gosh you Crazy Bitch!" Brooke exclaimed, jumping up from the couch and colliding into Rachel.
"I missed you too, Stupid Whore," Rachel commented. They pulled out of the hug. Haley was standing up with a hand on her stomach, wearing an amused expression on her face. Rachel smirked her Rachel smirk, the one that pissed Haley off along with a lot of other people during high school. And even now, it never got old.
"Harley," Rachel said, threatening to laugh.
Haley chuckled, "Hey Rachel." They two exchanged a quick hug. While that was going on, Brooke surveyed the redhead. Being a fashion mogul, Brooke knew her models, and Rachel was definitely whoring up a storm the last time she heard. But things didn't seem to be that way from the looks of it. It anything, she was a successful model. Even if it wasn't the truth, Brooke thought it was best to just go ahead and think that.
"So what the hell are you doing here?" Brooke asked.
"Photoshoot for Vogue," she replied, dropping her purse on the couch and sitting down.
"But why all the way here? I mean, don't you live in L.A?" Haley asked.
Rachel nodded, "Yeah. But all the other studios were completely booked for the next couple of weeks, and Vogue is a bitch. I guess Tree Hill wasn't as small as we all thought back then. There was a pretty good studio building a little out of town. Where I ran into Nathan, who in turn suggested I come and hang with you all."
"That's cool. How long are you going to be in town?"
"I don't really know. I guess however long I want to," she said, not really worrying about it.
"Well Peyton re-opened Tric a couple of weeks ago and is looking to have another night on Friday. You should definitely stay for it," Haley suggested.
"I might. We'll see what happens," Rachel said, keeping her eyes of Brooke, who had resulted to staring at her nails. "So I guess a 'congratulations' is in order. Right Brookie?"
Brooke rolled her eyes, mentally cursing Nathan, "Okay Rachel, whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it."
"Why? Because you've heard it before, right?"
"Rachel, I'm marrying Brian, so just drop it before I drop you," she threatened.
"Yeah, kind of like what you did to Lucas," Rachel snapped, scoffing.
Haley sighed, "Alright guys, it really wasn't supposd to go this way. Rachel, please respect Brooke's decision."
Rachel looked at her, "Why should I respect her decision when you haven't? Haley, I know you cannot be serious about this fucking engagement. Brooke's not in her right mind."
"Hello! I can hear you, you know!" Brooke exclaimed.
"I know you can heard me, so maybe I can talk some sense into you since I've promised myself I would withdraw from using physical force. My therapist says it increasing my life span," she explained.
"God knows you need it," Brooke said. "But Rachel, I really don't want to fight with you. This is the first time I've seen in you in years, and I don't want it to start off on a bad note."
As Rachel eyed her friend suspiciously, she couldn't help but wonder how different her old friend had changed. The Brooke Davis that she had known wouldn't just try to brush it off or change the subject. No, she would fight and fight until she proved that she was the one that was right in the situation. So, Rachel could do either two things; one, she could refuse to change what they were talking about, or she could just let it go. But not without a fight.
Rachel sighed, "Okay, I'm going to tell you something. Despite what you may believe, I still care about you. All of you. It just hasn't been the same since I left for school. And I know it definitely isn't any of my business since I haven't seen or talked to you guys in years, but I still care. That hasn't changed. I just, I don't want to see you make a mistake, Brooke. I think we all can attest to making mistakes, and they're definitely not easy to clean up. I know you know in your heart that this isn't what you want."
Contrary to what she had read in the tabloids or in the latest gossip magazines, Rachel wasn't as bad as Haley had thought. Originally, she didn't really expect much from the redhead besides a bad reputation for being 'friendly' with just about every eligible bachelor, or even taken man. But Rachel had definitely grown up, and for the better. Everything she was saying made sense, Haley just wished she could've said those things sooner.
Brooke didn't know if she should be pissed off or thankful that Rachel was speaking with words of wisdom. Apart of her was mad, because she knew she was right, and it made sense along with few other things in her life right now. But there were things that even Haley didn't know, and Brooke wasn't sure she was willing to spill those secrets. Just the reaction she would receive from her closest friend was enough for her to want to curl up in a ball and maybe die.
"Rachel I know that you're just trying to help, but you don't know the whole situation. You're right, I haven't seen or talked to you in years, and I'm not saying that it doesn't give you a right to say something, but it sure as hell doesn't in this department. This is my life, and I'll live it the way I want to. Brian, he's been nothing but good to be, and I can't hurt him like that. Not only would it hurt him, but it would hurt me too because believe it or not, I do love Brian."
"But not like you could ever love Lucas," Haley stated. "Rachel's not trying to tell you what to do. She's just saying what we've all been trying to tell you ever since you and Brian first got engaged. This doesn't feel right to anybody, including you."
Brooke sighed, running a hand through her brown locks, "You guys have no idea what I've been going through since I left Lucas that night."
Haley stared at her best friend curiously. What? She had no idea what Brooke had 'gone through' when she had broken up with Lucas. Truthfully, Haley didn't think it was anything other than a broken heart. But looking at Brooke right now, it seemed like there was a lot more than she had originally thought.
"Brooke, what is it?" Rachel looked on too, also wanting to know what this thing was that caused Brooke to keep it hidden even from Haley for all these years. It wasn't like it was any of her business, but damn it, she was standing there right now, and at this point, Rachel wanted to know more than anything.
Brooke looked at her best friend, guilt shrouding her sight, along with tears. For the first time in a long time, she was scared. That fear that just completely swallows you whole, was enveloping Brooke into it's posession. The words were on the tip of her tongue, begging to be let out after five years of keeping them in, except to Brian. The room felt like it was completely closing up on her, and there was nowhere else to go. Haley and Rachel both stared at her cautiously, both stunned.
"I can't..." she trailed, her voice become raspier and losing the strength and defiance that always came out of Brooke's mouth.
As Haley looked on, things started to make a little more sense. Of course there had to be something more to it. Brooke had told her that the reason she couldn't be with Lucas was because she couldn't hurt Brian like that. Although it was plausible, it was a shitty excuse, Haley knew that much. Marrying someone because they didn't deserve to be heartbroken was not something that Brooke Davis would be saying. Haley knew something was not right, and this moment was a testament to that. Now, what was it?
"Brooke, come on. You can tell us anything," Haley explained.
Brooke shook her head furiously, "No Haley, you don't understand. You're going to hate me if I were to tell you..."
X.X.X
Maybe Rachel was right. Maybe he shouldn't get involved, like he had originially said. But he wasn't so sure about making that promise anymore. As he was driving through the abandoned roads, Nathan tried to remember why he wanted to go see Lucas in the first place. Answer: because he was a nosey son of a bitch.
Frankly he wanted to know what had happened between Lucas and Brooke the past week. It didn't help matters that Brooke had gone back to being cheery about her own fucking wedding that wasn't even meant to be. Just being in the same vicinity as her was enough for Nathan to want to leave the house for the day, which he had done successfully for the past week. Brooke wouldn't tell him anything, he knew that much. But Lucas, that was a different story.
He didn't know if it was a brother thing, but Lucas would tell Nathan basically everything. There was nothing that Nathan knew of that his brother wouldn't want to tell him. Even if it was none of his business, he knew Lucas would tell him just to tell him. But from what had happened the past couple of weeks, Nathan wasn't sure that was a good thing. His curiousness was getting the best of him at this point, and his foot pressed harder on the gas pedal, turning into his brother's street.
It was supposed to be one of the best houses in town. It cost a lot, he knew that for sure. But it was abandoned, lonely, and looked like it held a lot of grievances. And Nathan knew all those things were right. Unbuckling his seat belt, he stared at the dark house. On the second floor there was a window, Lucas' office. The drapes were completely shut, the color being black ironically. Pulling his sunglasses off his eyes, he made his way up the driveway to the front doot. Without even hesitating, he opened it freely. There was no way anyone would want to come to the other Scott mansion under any circumstances, and Nathan was sure that Peyton was keeping up the habit of never locking anything.
The television was on in the living room, which Nathan looked first. There, seated in a large brown love seat, was his brother with a glass of caramel liquid in one hand, the remote in the other. His eyes remained glued to the basketball game that was going on the large plasma screen. Lucas didn't even bother to acknowledge him.
"Having fun?" Nathan asked, taking a seat on the large couch, getting comfortable.
"Not really," Lucas said bluntly. "What are you doing here Nate?"
On his way over to his brother's house, Nathan was wondering that same question. Of course, he knew what he wanted to know, but how did he go about it? Nathan didn't want to seem like he was only there for information, and that was it. He wanted to be there for his brother, but how did he express that? One thing was for sure, the youngest Scott was definitely not the one with words. He was more of the physical one, anyone that knew him could attest to that. Another trait, he wasn't one to beat around the bush.
Nathan shrugged, "I want to know what you and Brooke said that night."
Lucas chuckled, "Real subtle, Nathan."
"You know that's not my strong suit."
"Well, what all do you want to know then?" Lucas asked. Frankly he couldn't care less if the whole town came to him for answers, he would only answer to his brother. That's just the way it was.
"For starters, how the fuck did you two run into each other anyway?" Nathan asked.
"You know, I really don't know. But me and Brooke have this thing about always being somewhere at the same time. We were at the Rivercourt. I was still there after you left, then she came."
Nathan nodded, "Okay, that makes sense. That means you were there for a hell of a long time. So what? Did you two exchangeg harsh words or something?"
Lucas sighed, "You know, Nate, that's the thing. We didn't really argue. It was kind of like we were finding closure."
"Closure?"
"Yeah, like we were figuring everything out because we would never get the chance. I don't know, I just felt like I was losing her, and I just had to get out everything I had to say," Lucas said, a far-away look on his face. Truthfully it broke Nathan's heart to see his brother like this. Even Lucas didn't deserve to be put through shit like this.
"Honestly Luke, I think Brooke has lost her fucking mind. And it's not even the fact that you're my brother, it's her. Like, she's so focused on thinking about everyone else but herself, and I know that should be a good thing, but in this case, it's not," Nathan ranted.
Lucas smirked, "Thanks little bro. I know that you're not used to this, but in this case, not everyone Natey wants, Natey gets."
Nathan rolled his eyes, "One, don't even call me that again, and two, you're welcome. I know that you're hurting right now, and it sucks, but you're going to be okay. I hope you know that."
"I don't know what to know right now. I've been thinking, and I just need some time to just mellow out and let go of the past, because let's face it Nate, I've been living in the past for too long. Like, Brooke being engaged and us being over makes me just want to start everything over."
"Is that a good thing?" Nathan asked.
Lucas shrugged, "I'm not sure yet. I guess I'll have to do it to find out." Just as he said that, Nathan's phone ring, revealing the annoying little ringtone that came with the phone. Nathan fished it out of his pocket, sighing at the called ID.
"Speaking of the devil," Nathan mumbled, holding the phone to his hear, "Yes Brooke?"
Now normally in this situation, Lucas would have been freaking the fuck out. Brooke, Brooke Davis, the love of his life, was on the phone right now with his brother. He didn't know, but now it just seemed like the phone call was teasing him, holding Brooke over his head, because he knew that he couldn't have her anymore. He was stuck.
"Wait? What??" Nathan exclaimed, standing up from the couch. Lucas watched him curiously.
"Alright, I'm on my way," Nathan said, hanging up. He was already on his way out the door before Lucas finally jumped up from his chair, his scotch long forgotten.
"Nathan! Where the hell are you going?" Lucas demanded, walking out the fromt door.
"Haley's in labor!" Nathan exclaimed. Lucas' eyes bulged out of his head, and before he had a time to think, he had jumped into the passenger seat and had his seatbelt on. Throughout Haley's pregnancy, Lucas didn't even play a role. But now, with Nathan speeding at 80mph, Lucas realized that he was about to become an uncle. He looked over at his brother, who's hands were shaking on the wheel, his face pale with fear.
"Nate, it's going to be okay," Lucas assured him.
Nathan shook his head, "Something's not right."
X.X.X
"Oh my god, it's all my fault," Brooke groaned, holding her head in her hands, tears spilling through her fingers. Her and Rachel were sitting in the waiting room. Everything had happened so fast that she couldn't even remember all of it. Her heart hurt deep inside for a lot of reasons, and all she could see was Haley's pale face.
.FLASHBACK.
"Haley, I was pregnant," Brooke stated. Rachel's jaw dropped to the ground, and Haley's eyes bulged out of her eye sockets.
"You were, what?" Haley gasped. This could not have been happening. Brooke couldn't have been pregnant, because she would've known, being her best friend and all.
Brooke sighed, "I was pregnant back during college. I had just found out a couple of days before Lucas' heart attack. When I went to the hospital, I figured I could tell him, and we would be fine. But we broke up that night, and I never got the chance to tell him. Then, a couple of weeks later, I miscarried after I found out about Lucas and Peyton."
Haley collapsed on the couch, holding her stomach, trying to process everything that happened. Apart of her wanted to be supportive of her friend, who had lost a child at that. But the other half didn't feel any pity on Brooke because she had not known that her own best friend was going to have a baby.
"Brooke, why didn't you say anything?" Rachel asked seriously. This wasn't really any of her business, but she felt that she should ask for Haley's sake, who seemed to be in too much shock to talk.
"I don't know. I mean, I had planned on telling everybody that night and everything. Things just got so out of hand, that I just, I didn't," she explained, taking deep breathes in between. She felt like her stomach was about to drop into her butt, and that the more she talked, the harder it was to breathe.
"So you kept it from us, for all these years?" Haley asked.
"Haley it wasn't like that. I didn't do it on purpose, but I just didn't think it would change anything. I was still hurting over Lucas, and the baby at the same time. I didn't want to burden you guys with my own problems," Brooke said. Just talking about it made all the emotions she felt when her doctor told her that she had miscarried over stress.
"You still should have said something," Haley said bitterly.
"I know that, and I'm sorry Haley," Brooke said, almost begging.
"Brooke I don't think you get it. You shouldn't be making this sappy apology to me. You should be making it to Lucas. Do you have any idea how different things could've been if you would've just told Lucas that you were pregnant in the first place. And now, he has no idea, and you're supposed to get married to someone else. So, this is why you won't be with him. The guilt's too much for you."
"It's something that I've been living with for a long time. And yeah, it's guilt, guilt towards Lucas, and to myself, because it's my fault Haley, and I have to live with that. I just didn't want everyone else to have to live with it too," she said miserably, the ache in her heart that had been there for years becoming more apparent.
"Well you don't have to worry about that now," Haley said. As Rachel looked on, she didn't know what to make of this revelation. But she couldn't think about that now, because watching Haley's face turn from anger, to discomfort, made her just as worried.
"Haley, are you okay?" she asked cautiously, walking closer to the couch where the pregnant woman had been laying at. She was breathing heavy, and Rachel could spot the drips of sweat and were forming on her forehead. It was times like these and she was convinced she wasn't that much of an idiot to know that something just wasn't right.
Haley gasped in pain, "Something's not right."
.END OF FLASHBACK.
"Brooke shut the fuck up, it is not your fault," Rachel said, rubbing her friend's back. After calling an ambulance, Rachel had resorted to going over breathing techniques with Haley, along with Brooke, who was freaking out over the whole ordeal. Damn, she had only been back for less than an hour, and shit was hitting the fan.
"Rachel you don't understand, yes it is!" Brooke exclaimed. "If I hadn't have told Haley, or had told her from the very beginning, she wouldn't be hurting right now."
She couldn't help but smirk, "Brooke, Haley's about to go in labor, she would be hurting either way."
"So not the point!" she yelled miserably. "Great, now Nathan's going to be pissed at me, along with Haley..."
"Brooke you need to get a fucking grip," Rachel demanded, shaking Brooke's shoulders. "Now I know you didn't come all the way down here from New York just so you can sit around here crying like a little bitch. You came here so you can support Haley and Nathan, so you better get to it before I fucking kick your ass."
"Brooke! Rachel!" Nathan yelled from the elevator doors, Lucas hot on his heels. As Rachel and Brooke saw the two brother's jogging towards them, they were thinking the exact same thing, and it wasn't good. But at that moment she didn't know what the hell she was supposed to do. All that was on her mind was what she wanted to do, and that was to be in Lucas' arms. Turns out, he was thinking the same thing, because his arms were open as she jumped into them, clinging on for dear life. Just being close to him again was enough to bring tears to her eyes.
"Nathan go through those double doors, they're prepping Haley for the delivery," Rachel informed hurriedly, before Brooke could go into her apology serenade.
"Thanks," he mumbled before disappearing, not before smiling at the sight of Lucas and Brooke.
As Rachel stood there, like an idiot, watching an exchange happen, she couldn't help but wonder if Brooke was hugging Lucas because she was about to tell Lucas that she was once pregnant with his child. She couldn't help but feel bad for her friend and for Lucas, for that matter. She cleared her throat, watching Brooke and Lucas pull away awkwardly.
"Hey Rachel," Lucas smiled politely.
Rachel smirked, "It's about time you said something to me."
"Sorry," he said quietly, stealing a glance at Brooke, who was staring at her feet.
Rachel clapped her hands together, "Uhm, okay--"
"Lucas I need to talk to you," Brooke interrupted, staring hard at him.
"Alrighty then," Rachel said. "I'm just going to go make some calls. Brooke, can I have your cell?"
She nodded, fishing her phone out of her backpocket and handing it to Rachel. She grabbed it, grinning at them. "Okay, well, I'm going to head down to the cafeteria so, yeah, bye." And with that she disappeared by the elevator doors, giving Brooke a reassuring smile. Riding down the elevator, Rachel became even more somber than anyone would've thought. She had only been back in town for less than two hours, and this was getting way out ofh and. So from the looks of it, not much had changed.
Frankly, Lucas was surprised out of his mind that Brooke wanted to talk to him. Not only was it the fact that she was acknowledging him, but it seemed that whatever Brooke had to say, it was something that was important, and that couldn't wait. Unfortunately, Lucas wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing. They were walking around in the courtyard of the hospital, where memorials had been made in honor of heroic and successful doctors, and where men in large hats stood tending to the grass and gardens. She had her arms wrapped around herself, like a shield. But protecting her from what?
"So what did you need to talk to me about?" he finally asked, breaking the silence that had fallen. She continued to walk until they came to a set of stone benches, surrounded by a lavish garden of different flowers and plants. It was all beautiful, clearly the opposite of how both of them were feeling.
"Lucas, I haven't been honest with you," she stated quietly, sitting down cautiously on a bench. Lucas sat down next to her, anxious to hear something that made sense. But he only became more confused as he saw little droplets fall from her face and onto her jeans. He wanted to comfort her, but from what?
"Brooke, whatever it is, you can tell me. It's going to be ok--"
"No Lucas, it's not going to be okay," Brooke suddenly gasped out, choking on her own words. "You're going to hate me so much." Her insides were churning in pain, because she knew that this was the last straw. Brooke was going to lose Lucas for good, and this time, there was nothing she could go to fix it. The damage was done, and she had to face the music. The slow, deathening music.
"I could never hate you," he admitted, because he really couldn't. Sure, he could be pissed off to no end, but hating Brooke Davis was something that he could never bring himself to do.
She nodded assuredly, "Yes, you will. Lucas, you had every right to be mad at me when I left. I'm a horrible person, and you have to hate me."
He couldn't take this anymore. "Brooke, come on, tell me what it is. I love you, and I'm not going to hate you," he said, holding onto her shoulders. Her eyes read sadness, and the more deep he looked, the more scared Lucas became. Almost scared enough to not want to know.
With one quiet whisper, "I was pregnant," left her lips, and his whole world went into freeze mode.
"You, what?" he asked, suddenly losing all notions to breathe.
"I was pregnant during senior year of college. I was planning on telling you about the baby the night of your accident, but I never got the chance. So I went on, figuring I would tell you when we both cooled off. But, I lost the baby, Luke. I miscarried." There. She said it. Now, all she had to do was wait for the yelling to start.
As he sat there, he had literally forgot to inhale and exhale, because his body was telling him so many things at the same time. He had a CHILD, a baby, that was all his. For a moment, he felt joy at the thought of having a baby with Brooke. That was all he had ever really wanted. But then, he realized, that baby, was gone. GONE, and he didn't even know until five years later. And all joy had left his body, replaced with anger and grief. He extracted his hands from her shoulders, not wanting to even touch her.
"How?" he demanded, wanting to know the cause of the death of his unborn child. A child that he could never know.
"I was stressed. Haley had just told me about you and Peyton, and I just, I collapsed. The doctors said that there was nothing I could've done, it just happened."
"And that's supposed to make it okay?" he hissed.
"No," Brooke sobbed, "But it's the truth!"
"The truth!" Lucas exclaimed. "You want to talk to me about truth? You LIED to me for FIVE fucking years. Sure, I didn't see or speak to you for those five years, but even now, you couldn't even say anything. So what the hell does that make you! God, I had a child, an actual baby. Even if it, died, it was still apart of me. And you took that chance away for me to be there."
"Lucas, you have no idea how sorry I am," she said. "I just wish I could go back--"
"But you can't," he interrupted. He stood there for a minute, taking in all that had happened in less than five minutes. He wanted to scream, break things, cry, but he knew he couldn't do it. He also felt numb, and that was something that Lucas couldn't shake. Brooke was pregnant with his child, lost it, and now waiting five years to tell him. And now, she was supposed to marry someone...
"That's why," he said quietly to himself. He turned around, facing her. "That's why you can't fucking be with me. It's because you feel guilty because you didn't tell me. You're not marrying Brian because you love him, or because you don't want to hurt him, it's because you couldn't take the fact that you kept this from me. You know I wanted to propose to you, right?" he asked. "Yeah, I had the ring and everything. We could've been together and married, Brooke. But I guess we'll never know, huh?"
"Lucas, I'm sorry," Brooke choked, her sobs now turned into hiccups. Lucas was going to propose? The thought of him carrying a little box around with him, just to have her walk out on him with his child was enough for her to go into a comatose state. It was safe to say that she felt like complete shit.
What more could he say? She was sorry. There was nothing more that he could've asked her or said, because it was done with. Regardless of how he acted, the baby was gone, and it had been for years. Lucas just shook his head and walked away. If there was one thing he could say, it was that it did explain a lot. But it didn't make the anger and the pain any less. At this point he was running to his car, just wanting to get out of the same vicinity. This town was killing him, and he had to get out.
Racing down the streets, his foot felt like a metal pipe, and his hands felt like tuna fish sandwiches. Apart of him just wanted to drive off a cliff right now, but the other half just wanted to cry like a little baby. He was supposed to be grieving right now because he was almost a father, whether he knew it now or not. And that's what hurt the most. Lucas was supposed to be a father, and now he might never get the chance. There was no Peyton, and as of right now there was no Brooke.
How could she just do that to him? Lucas was angry with her, dead angry, the kind of anger that could kill someone. Brooke could always be someone that he would always come back to, but at this moment he wanted to be as far away from her as possible. Just the thought of her lying to him for years was enough to want to puke all over his car. This whole situation was just complete bullshit in his opinion. How could this have happened within a span of ten minutes? One minute, Lucas was convinced that Brooke was going to say she wanted to be with him, and that her prior decision was a complete mistake. But no, now he was speeding down the highway, thinking about the baby he would've had with her.
Before he knew it, he was parking and making his way through the electric doors. People were all around him, conversating with one another, reading the newspaper, listening to their iPods, or maybe trying to catch some sleep. But if you were a businessman, you were typing away on your laptop with your Bluetooth headset in your ear, talking rapidly. No one even noticed Lucas walking past them all, his hand already holding his credit card out of his wallet as he approached the front counter. There as an old woman behind it with wiry grey hair and eye glasses so strong that Lucas could see his reflection through them. He had to agree with the lenses, he looked like complete and utter crap.
"What can I do for you, sir?" the woman asked, her feeble voice breaking him out of his reverie.
"I need a one way first class ticket to Florence, Italy."