Author's Note: Happy Birthday Kirah

Warnings: Aku/Dem

Disclaimer: I don't own KH

Dinnertime Disasters

Xaldin frowned as Roxas let yet another dish go past him. The kid had been sulking all afternoon. He'd known dinner was going to be a trial, he just hadn't known what to expect.

Roxas was going for the hunger strike option.

Xemnas had noticed some time ago, but had yet to say anything.

"What's 'a matter little dude?" Xigbar asked.

"Not hungry."

"Got some tummy troubles?"

"There's nothing I want to eat."

Xaldin watched as Xigbar scan the table. He saw the scarred face register the lack of a certain dish.

"Hey Xaldin, why no cheesy noodles?"

Xemnas answered for him. "I just decided that it was time for a change," he said smoothly, "Besides Roxas, it won't hurt you try something different."

"It's not fair! Right Axel?"

"Axel?"

Number VIII, who normally would have jumped into the discussion long before this point, had been uncharacteristically unresponsive. This was because the pyro was literally falling asleep at the table. Xaldin couldn't help but wonder what Xemnas had had VIII doing to tire him out like this. And how could he make it happen more often?

He saw Demyx roll his eyes, and Axel suddenly jumped. Xaldin stifled a sigh. Demyx had been doing this all through the meal, either kicking Axel under the table or surreptitiously poking him with his fork to keep the pyro from drowning in his soup.

"Huh, Wha?"

"The mac and cheese Axel. It's not fair right?"

"S'right, Leven's a jerk," the pyro slurred before nodding forward. Demyx jabbed him with his fork again.

The Graceful Assassin suddenly knew how a rabbit faced with oncoming headlights feels.

"Well, someone certainly isn't all here tonight." His attempt to pass the comment off as the ramblings of a sleep-deprived maniac didn't work. "Besides I had nothing to do with it."

Xaldin thought he could smell smoke from where Roxas' glare was burning holes in Marluxia's coat.

"To tell the truth Roxas, I don't think I've ever seen you eat anything else, well besides ice cream," Luxord said.

Marluxia sniffed. "Huh, the gambler is right. You eat entirely too much of that stuff."

"I saw him eat French fries once," Axel offered, waking up a bit more to defend his friend.

"And such a bizarre flavor too," Marluxia went on ignoring the redhead. "It's not natural."

"Sea salt is not a bizarre flavor!"

"It is for ice cream."

"It's good!"

"It's unhealthy."

"Is not!"

"What do you care what he eats Marluxia?" Zexion asked.

"The Keyblade Master should behave with more decorum and less like a snot-nosed brat."

Axel leaned forward so he could glare at the flora wielder.

"What a load of hors—,"

"Be quiet the lot of you, I'm losing my appetite," Vexen interjected moodily.

"You don't care what I eat do you, Zex?" Roxas whined.

Larxene sniggered, "Did you just call Number VI sex?"

"No I said Zex. Short for Zexion."

"I think you did."

"Did not!"

"Oooo. Denial."

"I'm not denying anything."

"You're denying that you think Zexion is sexy."

"I'm not gay!"

"Prove it."

"That's enough," Axel tried to intervene for Roxas.

"Fine I will," Roxas looked around for a moment. The fact that he was stuck at the dinner table with mostly other male Nobodies, severely limited his options. The classic tactic of inexpertly frenching the nearest girl was, for example, ruled out. Naminé wasn't at the table tonight and there was no way he was trying that with Larxene.

"Er..how?"

Larxene smirked and very deliberately said:

"You could sleep with Demyx. He's a girl."

"Ah man, no way!" Demyx yelped.

"That's it," Axel snarled. The room, Xaldin noticed, was now several degrees warmer. He heard Saïx and Demyx shove their chairs away from the pyro. Quite suddenly, the Flurry of Dancing Flames completely failed to flair up. There was a sickening thud.

"Axel, are you okay?" a worried Roxas abandoned his seat and ran to his friend's side. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Ouch."

"Not at the table Firestarter," said Zexion flatly, calling his book back.

"Thank you Number VI," Xemnas said taking control of the conversation again. "Demyx if you would be so good as to help Roxas take Axel to his quarters."

Demyx sighed and surveyed the little drama behind him. Axel was leaning heavily against the wall, trying to get his eyes to focus. Demyx came close enough touch noses with the redhead. He waved his hand back and forth, and nodded as bright green eyes followed the movement. He was actually pretty good at accessing damage inflicted by his fellow Organization members, having so frequently been on the receiving end of their ire.

"Is he okay?" Roxas asked, blue eyes wide with worry, instead of slitted with general resentment for the world around him for a change.

"I'm fine," Axel stated pushing himself upright, trying to pass off Zexion's literary slam-dunk as a mere annoyance. It would have been a lot more convincing if he hadn't immediately collapsed onto the Melodious Nocturne. Behind them several of the others burst out laughing.

Demyx laughed as well, earning a Murderous-Glare-of-Fiery-Death™. "Well you will be just fine after a glass of water and a little nap," he grinned. He hefted the Flurry into less humiliating position, and opened a portal. He hoped Axel wouldn't regain his equilibrium for a while, because that was just about the only thing that was preventing him from bursting into flames and Demyx was currently out of spare coats.

So much for dinner.

Marluxia and Larxene exchanged a knowing look.

The remaining members turned back to their food, aware that the entertainment was over for tonight. Something still seemed to be troubling Xigbar however.

"Hey Xemnas?"

"Yes what is it?"

"What's the real reason there's no mac and cheese?"

888

The trio arrived in the corridor that housed VII, VIII, IX and X. Axel was concentrating on staying upright and Demyx didn't want to distract him.

Once inside, Roxas and Demyx had to navigate around the clutter. Axel believed in the "just drop it somewhere" method of organizing.

Demyx sat Axel down on a on a chair and wiped his brow. He was beginning to feel warm just being in here. And it wasn't the small fire in the huge black granite hearth either.

The whole room was done in the warm colors Axel loved, mostly shades of crimson, gold and cream. There was quite a lot of metal mostly silver and wrought iron, and a surprising amount of glass, tabletops and such. There was also a distinct phoenix motif, although dragons and felines were also in evidence.

"MEERR-WOW!!"

Correction, felines were not merely in evidence; they were unavoidable. Axel owned two Siamese cats. Luxord had once said that that was proof Axel was insane. From the top of a tall bookshelf, decorated with black dragons, two brown, pointed faces gazed down at them.

Demyx was surprised when he's first met the furry beasties. He would never have pegged Axel as a cat person.

They were he admitted, quite beautiful, in an exotic, graceful way. They had the softest coats he'd ever felt, but the two cats were loud, finicky, and had bad attitudes. They demanded, and always got attention, but only on their terms. They were always in your face. Somehow they always got their way. And they got neurotic if left alone for too long.

Later it occurred to him that Axel was simply a larger version of the cats with less hair and opposable thumbs.

Roxas wrinkled his nose in distaste. The cats somehow had the run of the castle (Xemnas could never figure out how), and for some reason they threw-up in XIII's shoes about once a week.

One long, lean figure leapt from it's hiding spot, and landed on Demyx's shoulder with impressive precision, if more claws than the Nobody would have preferred. Roxas scuttled back, just incase he was also being considered as a landing pad.

Demyx was subjected to a penetrative, slightly cross-eyed, deep blue stare. He couldn't help it. He cracked.

"Fine, you win," he muttered and pulled a packet out of his pocket. He unwrapped the slices of chicken he'd smuggled from the dinner table, and was treated to a yowl of joy.

"Geez, you'd think the lousy pyromaniac never fed you," he grumbled and handed the packet to his smirking superior, followed by the cat. VIII proceeded to feed the remains of the hydros's dinner to his pets without a shred of guilt.

He crossed the room and opened the door to the inner room. He groaned. The bed was a rumpled mess. Axel obviously hadn't made his bed before he left and from the amount of white fuzz on the sheets it looked like the cats had been sleeping there all day.

"Axel, where do you keep your spare sheets?"

"Bottom of the dresser," he called back and moved to get up. Green eyes snapped open wide and he hissed in pain. He dropped back down again. Roxas was by his side in flash, nearly tripping over the yowling cats.

"Axel, are you okay? What happened?"

"It's a side effect of Zexion's attacks," Demyx said coming over with an armful of russet colored sheets. "It makes your muscles go all tense and cramp up."

"When I can move again, I'm gonna kick that little bastard's ass!" The Flurry growled.

"And here I thought you liked Zexion," the Nocturne grinned. He pushed the load of linen into Roxas's arms. "Here, make yourself useful and make the bed."

The younger boy went off grumbling.

"How about your pj's, where do you keep them?"

Axel shrugged and then winced. "Have you seen me wear pajama's yet? I usually just sleep in my boxers, if anything."

"Should'a known," Demyx muttered. He pulled a throw off of the nearby sofa and spread it in front of fire. He took off his coat and then his gloves, laying them across a chair back. He turned to his superior wearing that unsettling tsunami smirk of his.

"Okay fire starter, strip."

Axel just stared at him.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

"What are planning to do? Molest me?" The smirk got wider.

"Well I was planning on giving you a massage, but I can do that too if you like."

The pyro gave him a dubious look. "You know how to give a massage?"

"Yes, I do."

"Where'd you learn that?"

"Marluxia taught me."

"What?"

Demyx gave him a quizzical look. "Why are you so upset?"

"I'm not upset yet. At the moment I'm freaked out."

"Umm okay whatever. Look if you must know, I get migraines. And around here the only choices are Marluxia and his aromatherapy or Vexen."

Axel relaxed a bit, "But still…"

"I know, I know. But I was desperate. To be honest, I flipped a coin. At least Eleven smells better."

Axel sniggered. "Well, alright." With the Nocturne's help he disrobed. When he wriggled out of his trousers, he heard a snort. He turned a fiery glare at the hydro.

"What?"

"Ah, c'mon Axel. Chili peppers? That's way too predictable."

"Shut up! Like you haven't seen them before. I like them. Besides you can't tell me that you don't own a pair with dolphins or something on them."

"Touché," Demyx said still giggling.

They finally got down to business and it wasn't long before Axel was feeling much better. Stretched out in front of the fire, warm and comfortable with the pain and fatigue fading rapidly beneath the hydro's strong fingers. This was better than the bath even. Axel began to purr as he practically melted under the gentle touch.

"Damn, Demyx. How much do you charge for a night?" The fingers froze.

Uh-oh.

There was a dull thwack.

"Owww! That hurt," Axel, complained rubbing his head.

"What are you guys doing?" Roxas asked grumpily. It had taken him ages to fix the bed. He kept tripping over cats. He stared. The sight of Demyx kneeling next to the nearly naked pyro was not welcome.

"I was just leaving," Demyx said coolly to Roxas.

"Aww, c'mon Demyx. I was just kidding," Axel grinned. Then he noticed how red the Nocturne's face had gotten.

IX pulled on his gloves and coat, stalked over to the mini bar and pulled out two glasses. He snapped his fingers filling both and turned back to Roxas.

"Do you want to stay with him?" It was a silly question. Roxas, of course, wanted to stay with Axel. Demyx told the younger boy to just let his friend sleep. Recovering from Zexion's attacks, even this relatively mild one, always required some quiet time to get all the neurons firing properly again in three dimensions.

"Make him drink one of these now and the other after he wakes up," he snapped and then he was gone.

Confused Roxas turned to Axel.

"Geez, Louise, Axel. I thought he'd forgiven us. What switch did you hit?"

"Hell if I know. I wasn't even trying," the dazed pyro murmured.

888

Demyx stood in the center of his room fuming.

Stupid, stupid, STUPID pyromaniac!

Stupid insensitive bastard!

And in front of Roxas no less.

He sagged to his knees, tears running down his face. He idly wondered about that. If he didn't have real emotions anymore, why did he still have tears to shed?

He scrubbed his eyes on the back of his sleeve.

Alright, alright. He was over reacting. Roxas didn't have a clue, he was sure of that.

As for Axel…

He sighed and got up, walking over to his wall-sized aquarium. He gently rested his forehead against the cool glass. The gliding fish and the slow waving of the anemones calmed him considerably.

Axel probably had just been kidding around. Hell, maybe he'd meant it as a sort of twisted compliment. That would be like Axel.

It had just hit too close to what Demyx was afraid was the truth.

And now he had a find a way to explain his outburst to Axel. Anything even close to the truth would drive the pyro away, and Demyx didn't want that.

He sighed again. He hadn't even gotten to finish his dinner.

Too be continued…