Chapter 17

Nostalgia

"The wars would all be over

'cause she'd raise us all as friends

and no'one would ever wonder

if somebody wanted them.

We'd walk on grass that's greener

and our cares would all be freer.

If the world had a mother like mine." - The Band Perry (I love them)

"Can't you walk any quieter," Magnus hissed, as they silently crept through the carpeted halls.

"I'm trying," Alec scowled, walking even slower than before. It was 12:35 and they were tiptoeing through Magnus' house, trying their hardest not to wake Anzo.

The house was even creepier in the dark. It's massive rooms and high ceiling meant that everything around them faded to pitch black, which creeped Alec out as how could he be sure they were alone. He could almost see eyes watching him from the darkness and he jumped every time the bottom of his trousers brushed against the other leg.

He breathed a sigh of relief as they finally reached the door to Magnus' familiar colourful room. Magnus fell down onto his canary yellow bedspread and rubbed his eyes, "I'm so tired I think I may just sleep in my clothes tonight" he groaned and his neon green shirt rode up to reveal his tanned hips. Alec blushed slightly and averted his eyes.

He then began setting up the fold out camp that now permanently resided in the corner of Magnus' room. Magnus had- after the very first time Alec had slept over- bought some bedding to go on the little bed. It was a really sweet gesture, even if the sheets were black with little skulls all over (according to Magnus if Alec was going to like black, he may as well go all the way into "Gothdom").

"Com'on sleepy," Alec smiled giving Magnus a hand up and out of the little nest of blankets he'd made and pulled him towards the bathroom. "You have to at least brush your teeth, I'm not kissing someone with bad breath." Magnus made a show of sprinting the rest of the way to the bathroom and furiously scrubbing his teeth with a disney princess toothbrush.

"Really?" Alec sighed looking at the pink instrument, but Magnus only waggled his eyebrows and made a noise that sounded like "Jealous!". After they were completely ready for bed- Magnus had eventually worked up the effort to change into a pair of silk pajama bottoms- they both clambered into their individual beds and Magnus switched off the light.

Alec lay there for a while in the darkness, the cotton bedspread stroking his face, listening to Magnus' breathing.

He was worried about the next day. He wasn't sure how he was meant to help Magnus when his boyfriend fell into an inevitable pit of sorrow. Was loving, and being there for him enough? Sure Alec had dealt with grief himself- not a day went by that he didn't miss his brother- but he hadn't handled it well at all. He'd pushed his emotions to the back of his mind and refused to deal with it. He ran from his problems, he was a coward.

But he didn't want Magnus to do that. Alec wanted the boy to move on and away from the dark person he had become since his mother's death. But Alec didn't know how.

He lay there for what seemed like hours, considering the conundrum, until his eyes began to slowly closed. When he was on the brink of sleep however a voice whispered, "Alec…..are you still awake."

Alec mentally slapped himself into consciousness and murmured, "uh huh, can't you sleep?"

"No. I keep trying but…..I'm scared Alec. My mother died a whole year ago, it's just too real."

Alec didn't know what to say to that, so he just stood up and clambered into bed beside Magnus, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's chest and nestling into his neck.

"I would take some medicine but it's too late now."

"You don't need medicine," Alec whispered back, "you are so strong Magnus and I'm right here to remind you of that whenever you forget."

Magnus relaxed slightly and ran a finger across Alec's jawline, "I love you so much…..you know that right?"

"Sure," Alec replied, emotion clogging his throat.

They lay together, as close as they could physically be and breathed in each others air.

"Tell me something about her," Alec whispered after a while, "something nice."

Magnus' lips curved into a small smile and his eyes glazed slightly. When he spoke, his voice was warm and soft.

"Well I remember when I was around ten, my school put on a production of peter pan. I really wanted to be Peter so I practiced for, like two weeks straight and I watched all the films and re-read the books. I was so excited...and sure I would get the part. I mean I could sing, act and dance so I was pretty confident. But then when the auditions came up I was so nervous. I mucked up my song, forgot my lines and presented myself as a shaking wrek."

Alec tried to imagine a nervous Magnus, dressed as peter pan- it was a bizarre image to say the least.

"I went home in tears, I was so upset. My Mum, after coaxing the story out of me, hugged me until I finished crying. Then she said that we didn't need all the other kids in the school to put on an awesome play. She went and came back with sticks and a hook and all sorts of random junk. Then we put on the play. It was so fun. We spent hours chasing each other around the house and sword fighting on the "ship" (which was actually the coffee table. That was before she became so depressed," he sighed, looking down at his and Alec's entwined hands, "She used to be so…..alive."

Alec rubbed Magnus arm, concerned. But he appeared to collect himself. "You should sleep," Alec muttered after a few minutes of Magnus playing with his hair.

"I know," Magnus breathed, his breath tickling Alec's skin. "I'm just….scared of what I will see."

"Don't be. I'm here and I promise that I won't leave you. You're safe."

Magnus smiled at him and his hand's grip on Alec's slowly loosened as his eyes shut. Alec watched him sleep (but not in the creepy way). Magnus looked more vulnerable than ever before. His expression was so open and peaceful that warmth crept through Alec's body, from his fingers to his toes. He had never felt this strongly about someone before and he had a hunch that it wasn't normal to fall in love as fast and hard as he was. Magnus was special.

He began to slowly slip into sleep and the last thing he felt were long slender fingers, entwined with his own. His anchor.

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The first thing Alec noticed upon awaking, was the dryness in his throat. It felt as if he had spent the night in the middle of the sahara desert, resulting in all the moisture leaving his mouth. It also felt as if he had swallowed a mouthful of sand, but Alec doubted that was the case.

He glanced around, desperately hoping to spy a glass of water within arms reach...but no such luck. The tiny numbers upon his wrist informed him that it was eight in the morning. Stretching and groaning he sat up and swung his legs out of Magnus' massive bed.

The boy in question whimpered and stirred slightly in his sleep, seeming to sense the movement around him. Alec looked down at the beautiful boy before his, his face peaceful and serene. He still found it hard to believe that his and Magnus' relationship was real. That someone as funny, kind and generally perfect as Magnus had even given him a second glance. That he loved him.

Bending down, he kissed Magnus lightly on the forehead before turning towards the door.

Alec made sure he was as quiet as possible during the journey to the kitchen. He didn't want to wake up any of the Bane family.

The Kitchen was pitch black and it took Alec a while to find the light switch. Grabbing a large glass from a nearby cabinet and began to fill it with icy cold water from the tap.

"Well I don't remember hiring you," a deep voice rang out. Alec jumped violently, dropped the glass (which smashed on the floor) and spun on the spot. A slender man stood casually in the doorway. He wore an expertly tailored- and expensive looking- suit, it's black, silky material complimenting the pale highlights in his golden hair.

"I-I'm sorry Sir," Alec stuttered, bending down quickly to clean up the remains of his glass.

"Quite alright boy" Anzo Bane said, giving him a calculating look, "am I correct in thinking that you are Alex Lightwood?"

"Alec Lightwood yes. It's a pleasure to meet you," he held out his hand, but Anzo didn't shake it.

"You're Magnus' boy?"

Alec felt unease creep into his stomach, he wasn't sure how much Magnus wanted his father to know. "Umm, we are good friends, yes."

"Don't bullshit, I know you too are doing the dirty," Anzo sneered, his eyes suddenly turning cold. Alec felt his heart speed up and he took a step back. "I have some advice for you. Get out while you can."

"I-I-I don't understand," Alec felt the back of his knees hit the kitchen counter.

"Look, I watched Magnus grow up and I know things about him that you don't. He's a manipulative little bastard and the thing he loves most is breaking hearts."

"That's not true," Alec cried, refusing to allow this man to talk that way about his boyfriend. But he couldn't completely ignore the part of him that believed every word.

"I've known him a lot longer than you Alec, so you may want to listen. Magnus has been so angry and broken since Sarwenda died, he just takes it out on everyone. He's truly rotten inside and he wants to make everyone feel the way he feels. He also likes a challenge...that's you. A poor, nieve and utterly viginal boy like you provides yet another person to conquer. That is all you are to him…..nothing more."

Anzo turned on his heels and made his way to the door, leaving Alec to stand alone , shell shocked. "Oh and Alec," the blond added, glancing carelessly back. " Tell Magnus that I won't be able to make the trip today- I have important business to attend to- but I will see him for the evening meal." Then he left Alec with his thoughts and newly formed doubts.

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"Magnus….Magnus….wake up." Alec shook the boy gently, causing his unspiked hair to flop comically, but the emerald eyes remained firmly shut. Alec sighed, before fetching a glass of water from the kitchen, and throwing it into Magnus' face.

The boy jolted violently upright, gasping and spluttering from his abrupt wake up. After realizing that he wasn't drowning he turned to glare at Alec, "you are very mean, I was having a nice dream."

"Sorry," Alec chuckled placing the tray of food he had prepared on the bed and sitting besides Magnus. "But I made you breakfast, so am I forgiven." He gave Magnus his best puppy eyes, which seemed to work as the other boy leant over and kissed away his pout.

"Thank darling," he smiled and they began to eat.

After half the food was gone, Alec decided to mention his run in with Anzo bane. "Soo, I met your dad," he said bluntly, not sure how else to say it.

Magnus paused, a piece of toast halfway to his mouth, "you what?"

"I met your Dad. I went downstairs to get a drink and bumped into him. Not literally though."

Magnus looked slightly worried at the news, "what did he say?"

"Errm," Alec wasn't sure that the truth was a good idea, "he just asked who I was, and i told him, then said to tell you that he couldn't spend the day with you due to important business, but that he would be home for dinner."

"Oh," Magnus replied, his expression impassive. He seemed to ponder Alec's words before some of the tension left his shoulders and he sighed, "Well it could have been worse. Plus I never expected him to spend the day with me, why would he suddenly start caring?

The bitter resentment in his voice worried Alec, who quickly said, "So what are we doing today?" Magnus' expression smoothed out, into the vulnerable look that Alec was growing accustomed to. "Well, I thought that since today is about remembering my mother, we should go and visit a few of her favorite places." Alec smiled at this and nodded at his boyfriend to elaborate.

"We'll start by going for a walk around central park- she always loved how peaceful it is there. Then we're meeting Agatha at Mum's favorite coffee shop- she used to go there for lunch at least once a week and she was constantly raving about their homemade soup.

Then we'll go to the art gallery there, as even though she never really pursued it my mum was amazing at art and she always said that it was one of the things that never failed to make her happy."

Alec smiled at this, stroking the other boys hand with his thumb. He remembered Magnus saying that he had enjoyed art and Alec made a note to ask about that later.

"Then Agatha's going to head home to start dinner and you and I…...well…..I was thinking we could visit her grave…"

Alec edged closer to the other boy, "That sounds perfect," he murmured softly, "I'm honored you invited me to share this experience with you."

Magnus nudged him playfully back and Alec thought he glimpsed wetness in his eyes, "who else would put up with all this crazy," he grinned before jumping to his feet and dragging Alec over to the large walk in closet. "Now let me dress you."

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"I told you," Magnus smirked over at his boyfriend, as they strolled down the tree lined pathway.

"I don't know what you are talking about," Alec replied stiffly, trying to keep his face composed and his breathing even.

"Sure you're not a tinsy bit toasty…"

"Nope I am wearing the epitome of comfort."

Magnus snorted at this and rolled his eyes at Alec's stubbornness. When Alec had allowed Magnus to "dress him" it really meant he could wear anything…...but it had to be dark and not revealing. So after a lot of discussions, compromises and bribes Alec was dressed in a black v-neck sweater and black skinny jeans and black Doc Martens. He was not at all impressed by his boyfriends monochromic clothes, but he let it go as Alec's ass looked fantastic in the jeans.

The park was fairly empty- due to the early hour- and contained mostly sweaty joggers or homeless people, dishevelled and asleep on the benches. The air was cool and fresh tainted only by the faint smell of cigarette smoke that seemed to linger in every corner of the city.

"you ok," Alec asked quietly, squeezing his hand.

"Yeah, yeah I am," he replied. Alec nodded content, and moved closer to him. "You know," Magnus mused after they narrowly avoided a cyclist who seemed to have problems controlling his bike, "this is the first time I've been here since she died."

Alec looked up at him thoughtfully, "and does being here make you sad?"

"No…..I think it might have a month or two ago, but now I'm getting better. She wouldn't have wanted me to fuck up my life just 'cause I miss her. plus," he gave Alec a mischievous grin, "I have you, so there's no reason to be sad." then he grabbed Alec's shoulders and planted a massive kiss on his pink lips. He ran his tongue along Alec's perfectly straight teeth, eliciting a shiver out of the other boy and ran a hand over his ass. "Magnus," Alec squeaked slightly jumping back. "you can't do that in public!"

Magnus chuckled at his boyfriend's scandalized expression, "sorry babe, but you can't wear tight clothes look super hot and innocent and then expect me to keep my hands to myself- I'm only human." Alec spluttered slightly before sending Magnus a glare. "Firstly I am wearing clothes that YOU picked out for me, secondly I don't want to be in a relationship with someone who cannot control his hands and thirdly don't call me babe- it's emasculating."

Magnus' grin grew wider and he fake swooned, "I love it when you're feisty babe," he purred before dodging Alec's elbow, "now come on or we'll be late for Agatha.

A/N

well that was a bad ending to this chap

Hey guys, sorry for the latest update ever, I've excuses. Firstly my friends have all decided to have their birthdays very close so a lot of partying has gone down. Secondly I went to london, where i was an extra for the new Sherlock Holmes film- "Mr Holmes"- starring Sir Ian Mckellan (GANDALF). I met him and he was super cool. Then i went to wales and then stratford upon avon. Plus I've just started my AS levels at a new school so I'm adjusting :/. Thirdly I have recently developed an obsession with Glee (I know, totally not cool) and Klaine. I know this is a rubbish excuse, but it's hard to write about a one pairing when you are reading and watching another. But I tried. I promised I would complete this story and I will.

Thanks for all the lovely reviews, especially MascareneFox for being really nice (although it's really ironic that someone compliments my fast updating and then I go into hibernation…..so yeah….sorry 'bout that)

Everyone reading this is super cool- apart from me :'(

Lots of virtual love

Amy

xxx