V.
Barry dreams of fire while he sleeps.
He's in a dark place, a blackened room only illuminated by flashes of light jumping off of him as he runs around in circles. He can feel the heat burning his back, the flames licking at his skin like a tongue of a dragon. He might as well be running around in a fire because the pain is inescapable and he can't even breathe as his precious oxygen is pulled away.
The sweat trickles down the side of his face, making a trail that starts under his mask and inches sluggishly down his cheek. The hot pain of the fire is consuming him, spreading to his limbs and his torso and not leaving a single part of him untouched. Barry wishes he could beg to someone for mercy, he wants to cry out at anyone for some precious water. But no matter how much he yells, no matter how loudly he screams, he is all alone in this world, left to fend for himself against unstoppable fire. No one can hear his cries though he is desperate for help.
After what feels like an eternity of agony and loneliness, a small beam of light breaks through the darkness. At first it's only a tiny stream that peers through a miniscule crack in the darkness, only a small glimpse that Barry barely even notices. But then the light grows. It spreads and spreads until the darkness begins to crumble like a falling building and Barry can see the gorgeous light above him. Though the fire still burns his flesh and he wants nothing more than to vanish so the pain will stop, the light is comforting. It's a warmer heat, a force that reminds him of why he keeps fighting, why he won't let this fire bring him down forever. This light seems to burn away the worst of the fire, even if it is still there, and he doesn't feel so alone anymore.
From the comforting light, Barry can hear a familiar voice calling to him. He can't place a name to the voice, but he knows that hearing this person's voice means he's safe. This voice has always been a source of friendship, of compassion, of love. When he hears this voice sweetly calling his name, telling him to fight and to hold on, he knows he has to listen because this voice means home.
For this voice, he'll fight off anything, including an eternal wall of fire that he can't escape.
For this voice, Barry runs faster. He runs around in infinite circles as the fire eats away at him right down to his bones and finally, what is left of the horrible darkness begins to crumble away and the light grows stronger. The voice fades in and out but Barry is still able to latch onto it and be pulled away from the darkness.
The nightmare falls away and Barry finds himself awake.
He doesn't open his eyes yet. His head feels like it's been filled with cotton and there's no possible way he can lift his heavy eyelids when his whole brain has transformed into fried mush. All of his limbs have apparently been replaced with concrete so there is no hope for him moving anytime soon. Even with the nightmare gone, the heat is present and real and it burns uncomfortably across his body. Though his entire body is currently throbbing in agony, his torso is the worst. He can sharply feel the two spots in his side where he was shot twice, both of the injuries screaming loudly as it aches with the beat of his heart. He wants nothing more than to leave reality once more and go to a dream that is less painful and fiery.
The only solace he has comes in the form of a hand clutching his, effectively grounding him despite his injuries. The skin is smooth and cool and comforting against the furnace he feels he's turned into. Though his mind is a bit fuzzy at the moment and he isn't quite sure who is holding his hand, the contact is certainly comforting.
Without opening his eyes, Barry knows that he's lying down somewhere in S.T.A.R. Labs. The bed is stiff, but not entirely uncomfortable and the sheets happen to be fairly cool. He can hear the slow beeping of a machine by his side and he feels the annoying itch of an IV in the crook of his arm. There are a few quiet voices whispering in the distance, but Barry can't make out what's being said.
Just when Barry thinks he could go back to sleep, there's a light touch on his arm that would have made him flinch if his body was in the mood for motion.
"Barry?" A soft voice calls out. It's a woman who he definitely knows, but it's not the same voice that saved him from his nightmare. "I know you're awake, Barry, there's no use pretending you aren't."
Though the voice has called his bluff, there is no way that Barry is going to open his eyes. He's way too tired for that.
"C'mon, Barry. Open your eyes for just a second so I can check up on you. Then you can go back to sleep, I promise."
As much as Barry wants to stubbornly resist what the voice is asking him to do, the woman sounds worried and desperate and he knows that she is a friend, that she is there to help him. Besides, the hand that is clasping his so tightly is definitely supporting the fact that this new voice only wants to help him. His face feels like it's about to melt off and his head is pounding persistently, but he slowly starts to peel his eyes open.
At first, the world is extremely blurry. The typically bright lights of the lab have been dimmed for his comfort and he can barely make out shapes swimming around in his field of vision. All of the colors in the room have been swirled together like a watercolor painting that had been left out in the rain. Off to his right, he can see the sleeping figure who owns the hand and an open doorway in the distance. Soon, the world begins to focus and even with his eyes partially closed, Barry can tell that Iris is the one who holds his hand.
Surprisingly close to his face, Barry finally makes out the features of Caitlin's face, her expression pinched with professionalism and concern. Held in her hand is a small flashlight, one that she shines over his eyes with a brief smile on her face. Around her form, Barry can't see any of the regulars hanging about S.T.A.R. Labs but he almost finds himself too tired to care. Almost.
"There you go," Caitlin says encouragingly. She frowns when she sees Barry's eyes flit quickly over his surroundings. "What's wrong?"
Barry wishes he could speak, he really does, but his throat is too dry and his vocal chords seem to have taken a vacation. Unable to communicate his worry over the whereabouts of the rest of the team, he tries to stare pointedly in the direction of the cortex.
"Where is everyone?" Caitlin confirms. Barry nods and immediately regrets it when a sharp pain travels from the base of his skull all the way up to his forehead. "Joe and Cisco are at the precinct dealing with the situation, Professor Stein is down in the labs, and I'm not really sure where Jay is. Don't worry," She concludes as she places a consoling hand on his burning shoulder. "Everyone is fine, you're the one you should be worried about."
He allows his body to relax, the tension falling away and leaving him to deal with the pain that echoes throughout his body. It's times like these that make him wish there were painkillers that actually worked on him.
"Barry," Caitlin says quietly. "You really need to rest. You're in pretty bad shape. When you're doing better, I promise I will explain everything to you but right now you need sleep, okay?"
Instead of nodding again, a mistake that Barry will not be repeating, he chooses to respond by letting his eyes fall shut once more. He hears Caitlin sigh in relief, then he's gone once more.
This time, there are no more nightmares. Actually, he's not that sure he's fully asleep because no matter what lazy darkness he drifts through, he still has some sort of clue as to what's happening around him. Iris' hand rarely leaves his, and if it ever leaves, it's back before Barry can panic over its loss. Around him, he can hear the voices of his friends moving about the room, sometimes increasing in volume until Caitlin silences them with quick and harsh words. Sadly, the pain is still with him as he sleeps, his bones aching and his torso throbbing with no end in sight.
When he wakes up, the pain isn't any better. In fact, it may even be worse than before. Along with the persistent headache, the sweltering heat, and the agony resonating from his abdomen, he still feels sick. He can still feel the heat rushing throughout his body, the churning of his stomach even though he hasn't eaten in ages.
Barry is able to open his eyes without any insisting on Caitlin's part, which he considers a huge accomplishment. In the same manner as before, the world stays blurry for a few moments before clearing up.
The room is much more crowded, now. Iris is still at his side, hand still holding his, but she is awake and her attention is directed at the center of the room. There, Barry can see Caitlin, Cisco, and Joe standing in a half circle and discussing something in sharp whispers. Behind them, Barry can see Jay leaning back against a counter with his arms crossed over his broad chest and a deep frown on his face. Overall, the atmosphere of the room is extremely tense with all five of them wearing expressions of concern and discomfort.
He can't sit up with the war being waged inside of his abdomen, so he tilts his head in Iris' direction so he can see all of his friends. So far, none of them have noticed that he is awake and he would smile at his sneaky manner if even the thought of that action weren't so exhausting.
Luckily, he can speak this time around. "What's goin' on?"
In unison, all heads snap in his direction, the conversation suddenly halted in favor of his unexpected awakening. All of them rush to surround his bed except for Jay who hangs back and wears a relieved expression instead. Caitlin looks over his vitals on the beeping monitor next to his bed and proceeds to examine him. It's only then that Barry notices he's shirtless and from the amount of open space he can feel under the sheets, he's only wearing his boxers.
"How are you feeling?" Caitlin asks. The room is eerily silent aside from her words, the monitor, and Barry's strained breathing.
"Like I was hit by a truck." He replies in short gasps. Caitlin checks his eyes like she did before. She moves down his body, taking his temperature with a frown and inspecting his skin. Finally, she reaches the middle of his torso and that's when Barry sees the thick pads of gauze taped over his side, little splotches of blood soaking through the surface. She peels the gauze up from the bottom to inspect the wounds and even though Barry can't see the injuries from this angle, he can tell from the look on her face and the biting of her lip that it isn't good.
"Do you remember what happened?" Caitlin asks him.
His head is rolling around on the pillow and he's not entirely sure where he should be looking. He feels a bit dizzy and disoriented but he does remember what occurred to put him in this state.
Barry doesn't feel like he could convey a proper nod, so he chooses to speak. "Yeah."
Already, the bed is starting to feel confining. He's sweating profusely and every part of him wants him escape. Following his body's wishes, Barry starts to move his arms to raise the rest of him up. The IV tugs inside of his arm and Iris' hand grips his even more snuggly and the rest of his team rushes forward, Caitlin making it to his side the fastest so she can press her hands down gently on his scorching shoulders.
"No," She insists. "You are not going anywhere for a while, Barry. Not until we figure out what's going on with you."
He sinks back into the bed and frowns. "What do you mean?"
She bites her lip again and looks back for some support. Cisco raises his hands in defense and Joe is focused on staring a Barry with intense concern that could probably burn a hole straight through Barry's skull. In an attempt to reassure his foster father, Barry ignores the cracking of his dried lips and gives Joe a small smile. Joe returns it but he definitely doesn't appear to believe Barry's assurances.
"After you were shot and came back here," Caitlin starts to explain. "Cisco and I had to treat the two gunshot wounds you had received. One of them had barely scraped against your large intestine so I had to perform surgery to make sure the laceration didn't grow larger. Then I stitched up your wounds and you've been asleep for three days, not counting when you barely woke up last night."
She pauses for a moment to glance at Barry and make sure he is still following her story. His head is still fuzzy but he's been listening carefully so he gently nods so she can continue.
"In that time, Barry, all of your wounds should have been fixed by your regenerative healing ability. But, I've been routinely checking them and none of them have healed at all."
Despite the heat that has spread throughout Barry's body, he feels a cold chill roll down his spine.
He can't heal anymore?
No, no, that can't be right. When he had taken down those robbers, his speed had been just fine and that's when he had received his injuries. There's no way that his healing could have gone down the drain while his speed had remained intact.
"That's not possible." He croaks. "I was running just fine a few days ago."
Caitlin shrugs and looks like a caged animal and Barry realizes that she is just as puzzled as he is.
"We know, bro." Cisco pipes up. His eyes, like the rest of the group's eyes, are lined with dark smudges of exhaustion. "That's why we're so confused. We were just talking about it when you finally decided to wake up."
If his head hadn't been pounding so painfully, Barry would have rolled his eyes at him.
"Along with your injuries," Caitlin says. She obviously looks uncomfortable to be the bringer of bad news. "That sickness you've had hasn't gone away. Barry," She sighs in exasperation. "When you came in here after you'd been hurt, you had a fever of 106.3. That's enough to have put any normal person in the hospital a long time ago. When I just took it, it had only gone down to 106."
Huh. That explains all of the horrible heat he's been experiencing.
"Do we have any idea what's wrong?" He asks.
All of them look nervous at the question. Iris squeezes his hand tighter.
"I took a blood sample while you were unconscious." Caitlin says. "There seems to be some sort of poison in his blood that I can't trace back to any known kind of plant or animal. It's likely been attacking your immune system, which would explain why you have your speed but not your healing abilities."
Barry gives a small nod and lets his head roll around a little more. It's much easier to just let his eyes point wherever rather than focus on one thing at a time. As he remains partially zoned out, the conversation continues.
"Is there any way to make an antidote?" Joe asks. His voice sounds incredibly worried and Barry feels a little guilty for doing that to him.
"No." Caitlin's voice sounds muffled. "I would need a much larger amount of the actual poison to be able to synthesize anything like that. Besides, we don't even know how he came into contact with the poison in the first place."
Cisco sighs. "This is a real pickle."
Jay finally speaks up from his position away from the action. "We can't have Barry not healing. Who knows if the poison won't start chipping away at his speed too."
As the discussion fades away into the background, Barry finds himself staring at Iris as a way to keep himself awake. Her features, while marred by fatigue and worry, are also showing strength and determination, something that Barry has always admired about her. No matter how dire the circumstances, she has always been prepared and willing to do whatever necessary to overcome any and all obstacles. Barry's just afraid that there will be no solution this time around.
But then, Barry starts thinking. He muddled, tired, dizzy mind starts thinking and remembering and a cold weight settles into his heart, reminding him of his lovely encounter with the strange metahuman the other day.
His head rolls to his look down at his right bicep. Lying there across his skin, looking like he had just received the wound minutes ago, is the cut that had come from the metahuman's spikes.
"Guys," He says in a painfully ragged voice. Immediately, the conversation stops and all attention is back on him. Iris leans in a little closer. "You remember that meta I fought not too long ago?"
"Yeah," Cisco nods. "Green Thumb."
All eyes turn to him. He simply shrugs.
"Seriously?" Caitlin exclaims. "That's the best you can come up with?"
"Hey," He says defensively. "I don't see you coming up with any good code names!"
"Anyway," Barry continues with a slur in his voice. "She shot these crazy spike things at me that scratched me on the arm. I got sick right after that, so maybe they could have had the poison on them?"
Caitlin nods. "That could be the case." She frowns. "Why didn't you tell us about this after it happened?"
He attempts a shrug. "It didn't seem that important."
A collective groan rises from the group and Barry can't help but think he may have made the wrong call on that.
"We found a bunch of those spikes at the crime scene." Joe says. "None of them appeared to have any poison on them."
"Yeah." Jay says. "When Caitlin and I checked it out, all of the stuff we brought back here to analyze didn't have traces of any kind of poison on them. The poison probably evaporates after long periods of time."
"Which means we need fresh spikes." Iris says. "Which also means we need the meta in order to get some."
"Luckily for us," Barry says. "It seemed like the meta was looking for revenge on those scientists. If the meta had a connection to Mercury Labs, then she should be easier to find."
"Great!" Caitlin says as she claps her hands together. "We will get on that! In the meantime, you need to rest more. If you can't rely on quick healing to heal your wounds, then we'll need to save as much as your energy as possible."
As much as Barry would like to be up and helping the team find out who this meta is, Caitlin is certainly right about him needing more rest. Just from being awake for these few minutes, he feels entirely drained and he is still filled to the brim with agony. This time, he's willing to listen to her demands and rest some.
He barely notices when the rest of the team files out of the room to give him some space. Jay gives him a nod, Cisco pats his foot, and Joe goes so far as to walk up to Barry and give him a gentle hug.
Joe smiles tightly at Barry. "Get better soon, okay?"
Barry smiles back with what little energy he has left. "Got it, Joe."
Joe is the last one to exit the room, leaving behind only Caitlin and Iris with Barry.
As Caitlin looks over his vitals and adjusts the IV in his arm, Barry rolls his head so he can look up at Iris. She smiles delicately at him and brushes her free hand through his hair.
"You should go sleep." He says.
She laughs at him and pats his hand. "I'm not going anywhere."
He doesn't argue with her, but he hopes she knows how grateful he is.
As his body burns and aches, Barry is grateful that he has something soothing to hold on to.