Myka and Pete make a gruesome discovery, Myka struggles to cope. May be slightly NSFW…

The following morning Myka was due at the station at 9am. However, she was woken at 7.20 by her phone. Her alarm was due to go off at 7.30, but she still glared at her cell before answering.

"Sheriff. It's another murder. Two, actually."

She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Where?"

Leena's quiet voice gave her the details and she drove to the same woods where many of the other bodies had been found. She met Pete there and he nodded to her without saying anything. He pointed into the woods.

"This way, Sheriff."

It suddenly struck Myka as she watched Pete's nose twitching that he had been sniffing out the remains with his shapeshifter powers this whole time. It wasn't surprising that she hadn't realised before; after all, shapeshifters weren't 'out' like vampires were – she didn't even know that they existed before Pete had told her what he was. But she still felt like she should have realised that the sniffing at crime scenes was something unusual. Especially when she, herself, was so unusual. She smiled ruefully and followed Pete into the woods.

A few minutes later they came upon the scene. Two small children, 8 or 9 years old. Twins. She knew them. Early in her tenure as Sheriff one of the girls, Lacey, went missing. Myka stayed up for 36 hours straight, trawling through the woods with every search party. Eventually she decided to go out searching on her own, leaving Pete to lead the town search party. She found the child hiding in a hunter's hide in the woods. She didn't tell anyone how, but once she was far enough away from everyone else, she could hear the girl. Not clearly, of course. But she could feel a mind out there where no mind should be. She carried the child two miles through the woods – her radio shorted out and there was no cell service. She still remembered the look on the girl's mom's face when the woman arrived at the hospital and saw that her little girl was alive. Pure joy.

Myka was unable, this time, to be completely dispassionate as she looked at the mutilated bodies of the children in front of her. The little girl on the right was the one Myka had saved.

"Shit," Pete choked out. He was pretty close to the kids' parents.

Myka didn't trust herself to speak. She examined the scene carefully and took note of all of the details. She noticed, out of the corner of her eye, something white against a nearby tree. It was a white rose, nailed to the tree with a small piece of paper wrapped around the stem. Myka put on a pair of latex gloves and unrolled the paper carefully.

"Happy birthday, mummy."

Christina had left her mother a birthday present.

Myka wasn't sure how she got through the rest of the day. She felt like the voices, the noise, the buzzing, were all amplified. They went to notify Lacey and Hannah's parents of their murder. In the end, Dr Calder had to come and sedate Catherine, the girls' mother, because she went mad with grief, trying to tear her own hair out. Myka had read about people doing that in their grief, but she'd never seen it before. She never wanted to again. She'd had to leave the room, swaying at the onslaught of Catherine's pain against her mind.

She was drained and she couldn't take it anymore, so she left a concerned Steve in charge at the station and went home. She got into the shower and stayed under the hot water for what felt like hours, and when she came out she sat on the porch with a hot cup of herbal tea. It wasn't until she heard Helena's voice that she realised she hadn't touched her tea. It was cold, still clutched in her hands. Her hands were white and bloodless from clutching the cup tightly.

"Myka? Are you all right?"

She turned her eyes to the vampire, who was peering at her in concern.

"I'm fine," she said absently, and went back to staring into the yard.

"What has happened, Myka? You don't look well."

"I'm fine," she repeated, mechanically.

Helena took the cold cup of tea from Myka's hands gently, rubbing them to try and get some blood back into them. Myka stared down at her hands.

After a while Helena placed another cup in her hands, this one full of warm liquid. Tea, with a dash of brandy, by the smell. She lifted it to Myka's lips, encouraging her to drink. Myka swallowed automatically, wincing a little at the bitterness of the brandy.

"Can you tell me what has happened, Myka?"

"You didn't tell me it was your birthday," Myka said vaguely, before she thought about it.

Helena's face stilled.

"What did you say?"

"She left you a note. Happy birthday."

"What did she do, Myka?" she asked quietly, in a controlled voice.

"She killed two little girls. They were twins. They were such nice girls, Helena. One of them – she went missing earlier this year, and I found her in the woods. I carried her home. She was such a bright girl, Helena. She didn't deserve this. They didn't deserve this."

Helena's face was set.

"I…I am so sorry, Myka. This shouldn't have happened. This is my fault."

Myka said nothing. She didn't have it in her to comfort Helena, not after what she'd seen today. What she'd felt, from Catherine and John. She felt like her inside had been ripped out, burned with acid. Her chest hurt.

"Are you okay?"

"Of course not," Myka said wearily. "How could I be?"

She didn't look up. Helena sat next to her and strong fingers lifted her chin, forcing her to look into Helena's eyes.

"Myka. How long have you been sitting here?"

Myka shrugged.

"Come inside, Myka."

She led Myka inside, fussing over her and wrapping her in a blanket. She went into the kitchen and heated some soup that Myka had left over in the refrigerator. She sat and watched Myka as she ate, who was too tired, too drained – too something to protest that she wasn't hungry. When Myka had finished, she took the bowl away and took Myka's hands in hers, looking at her carefully.

"Myka. What happened?"

Myka recited the events of the morning emotionlessly. She left nothing out, not even to save Helena's feelings. This was not Helena's doing; Myka knew that. But she was indirectly responsible for this, and she had failed to kill Christina when she could have. Perhaps this would give her the motivation she had been lacking, before. It was unfair to think of it that way, but facts were facts. Had Helena killed Christina when she could have, those kids would still be alive.

When she finished, Helena looked away, her jaw clenching.

"I know that nothing I can say will make this any better, Myka. But I am so sorry. Sorry that those children had to die, sorry that you had to endure seeing this. Feeling this must have been almost unbearable."

Myka just stared. She didn't have the words to explain what it felt like to tell someone that their children were dead, to feel the torrent of despair and rage and grief flood through them and into her own mind. She felt like she had fire ants crawling under her skin, in her heart. She didn't honestly know if she had the strength to survive it. And they weren't even her children.

"Myka. Myka. Are you okay? Myka?"

She was oblivious. The pain was so strong, the devastation. She wouldn't be surprised to get a call soon that one or both of the kids' parents had taken a handful of pills or eaten a gun. She wouldn't be surprised if someone got the same call about her.

Helena was shaking her. She snapped out of her daze enough to mutter another 'I'm fine,' but Helena was not convinced.

"You have to control this ability, Myka. You have to learn to shield these emotions out. They could swallow you. The grief of losing a child – it is indescribable. Even indirectly, it must be intense."

Myka knew all of that. She couldn't stop herself from laughing bitterly.

"You think I don't know that, Helena? I felt that woman break today, when I told her that her little girls were dead. I felt every emotion that she and her husband felt. I threw up in their back yard, Helena. I nearly passed out with the pain. I…whatever this ability is, it's not a fucking gift. It's a curse. I don't know if I can even…the pain that woman was in…I don't know how she's still alive, Helena. I damn near blew my own head off when I got in the car."

Helena squeezed her hands, her eyes wide with concern.

"You can't let it consume you, Myka. These aren't your feelings. They weren't your children."

"I know that, Helena," she snapped.

The vampire recoiled slightly at her tone.

"I…should I go, Myka? I can call your friend Peter, if you'd rather he were here with you?"

Myka thought about it. She probably shouldn't be alone, in the circumstances. But the thought of Pete being here, seeing her like this? She didn't want that.

"No, don't go, please. I'm sorry."

"What do you want me to do? How can I help you?" Helena said, anxiously.

"Just…just sit with me," Myka said wearily. She sat back on the couch, the blanket still wrapped round her, and Helena sat next to her, watching her carefully. Myka closed her eyes and tried not to think about the screams of anguish that felt like they were still resonating through her whole being. She noted with some surprise that her hands were trembling under the blanket.

"Could you…could you hold me, Helena?" she asked, without looking up.

Helena lifted her effortlessly onto her lap, wrapping Myka, blanket and all, in her arms. Myka relaxed against her, her face buried in Helena's neck. Helena was rubbing her back soothingly, her lips against Myka's hair. After a while Myka found that she was concentrating more on the physical sensations Helena was evoking than the horror of the day that she'd just endured. It was soothing, to be held and comforted, and to lie with someone without having to endure their emotions on top of her own.

"I'm so sorry, Myka," Helena murmured, with real pain in her voice. "I didn't want this. I know you are probably thinking that I could have stopped this, and you are right. I could. If I had been strong enough to kill her before, those children would still be alive."

Myka sighed. Her heart was torn. She understood why Helena had stayed her hand, why she had been unable to kill her own daughter. But on the other hand, in doing so, she had condemned countless others to death. Those girls – they were babies. They hadn't even started their lives, not really. And that…that parasite, she was ending innocent lives for the sake of spite, or possibly amusement.

"I understand, Helena. I just wish that things were different. And I wish…God, this is so selfish…but I wish I didn't have to feel it. I wish they were all as blank to me as you are, that I didn't have to sit here feeling their grief along with my own horror."

Helena's arms tightened around her a little.

"I would protect you from it if I could, Myka. I am so sorry."

She kissed Myka's brow and her closed eyelids, resting her own forehead against Myka's for a moment.

"I wish James had simply drained me. Then perhaps things would have been different, but if not, Christina would have died when she was supposed to, and none of this horror would have happened."

Myka pulled back a little, staring at Helena. Helena's words had shocked her out of her daze a little more.

"Do you really feel that way? That you should be dead?"

Helena smiled wanly.

"I am dead, Myka. For all intents and purposes, anyway. I do not breathe, my heart does not beat. Whatever I am, alive does not cover it. The sun abhors me. Its touch would burn me to ash. Does that not tell you all you need to know?" She said it archly, mockingly, but Myka could read the vulnerability and uncertainty in her eyes.

"Is that how you think of yourself? As something that the sun rejects? I thought vampires were afflicted by a virus, not undead."

Helena smiled, but there was little humour in it.

"I believe that is the official story. But come now, do you really believe that? We are the undead. We are supernatural beings. We are the embodiment of the dark. We prey on the living." She looked away, her nostrils flaring and her jaw tight.

Myka shifted uncomfortably. Helena had echoed her own thoughts about Christina; that she was a parasite. But she didn't feel that way about Helena. Helena was a good person, or vampire, or whatever, Myka could feel it. Or rather, she couldn't feel it, but she believed it nonetheless.

"The sun isn't rejecting you, Helena. Whatever you are, you vampires, it's nothing to do with evil – or at least, not necessarily. You are proof that good exists in vampires, just like everyone else. If you were truly evil, you wouldn't care what your daughter was doing out here – you'd just carry on draining your latest human and move on."

Helena turned to look at her with that unfathomable gaze, but Myka could tell that she was getting somewhere.

"Are you telling me that you don't care about those children? Their parents? Me?"

Helena considered for a moment.

"I still have feelings. I still care. But I fail to see how that is relevant."

"I think you see exactly why that's relevant, Helena. If you were evil, you wouldn't be sitting here comforting me when I'm in pain. You would have let Walter Sykes rape and murder me. You risked yourself to come back here, so I wouldn't be hurt. You killed him and Marcus to save my life. You gave me your blood, Helena. You didn't have to do any of that. So get off your damn cross, okay?"

Helena stared at her, and then nodded.

"Good," Myka said.

She settled back into Helena's arms, and the vampire held her closer, kissing her temple softly. Myka resisted the urge to laugh at the tenderness of the gesture. Evil, indeed.

Helena began to stroke her hair slowly, her fingers massaging Myka's scalp, draining away the tension. Her fingers began to trail slowly down Myka's neck and jaw, and Myka shivered at the feeling of the vampire's cool flesh against the warmth of her own.

Those fingers stalled for a moment at the strong pulse under Myka's jaw, where Helena had bitten the night before. Myka's heart began to speed up. She needed something, anything to take away the weight of grief that was pulling her under. She unravelled the blanket that was surrounding her enough that she could free her hands, could touch Helena, could think about something else other than devastation and grief. She slid one hand to the back of Helena's neck, not quite meeting her eyes.

Helena's eyes were black, with virtually none of the iris showing. Myka leaned forward, tilting her head, and she kissed Helena softly but intently. Her other hand buried itself in Helena's hair. The kiss became deep and open mouthed and wanting swiftly. Myka wanted nothing more than to forget everything that she'd endured that day, and she lost herself in the feel of Helena against her. Helena broke away for a second to murmur in Myka's ear.

"Is this what you want, Myka?"

Myka answered her by pulling her forward by the hair, not entirely gently, and kissing her again, her tongue moving against Helena's. Helena responded with a small growling noise and Myka was suddenly aware that there were fangs once again nipping at her lips and tongue. Helena was suddenly standing, with Myka still in her arms, and before Myka could adequately process that movement they were in her bedroom.

"Wow..." she said breathlessly.

"I can move quickly when I need to," Helena said, her arms cradling Myka as if she weighed nothing.

"Bed…" Myka said, before she absolutely had to kiss Helena again, had to feel that cool mouth moving against hers. She barely noticed the movement but suddenly they were sitting on the bed and Helena's arms were still around her, and Helena's tongue was moving against hers in a wonderful rhythm.

Myka's hands went to Helena's shirt buttons, undoing them slowly, and she broke away reluctantly from Helena's mouth so that she could kiss the skin she was uncovering. Helena was so very pale, but her skin had a pink tinge – presumably she had been drinking synthetic blood before she arrived at Myka's home. Her flesh was cool, but not unpleasantly so. Myka's fingers kept on unbuttoning and after a moment her mouth found Helena's satin-covered breast. Helena's arms tightened around her and she made another growling noise, and she pushed Myka suddenly onto her back and pulled her t-shirt off over her head, her mouth going to Myka's abdomen and kissing the muscles there.

"You are so very beautiful, Myka," she murmured, in between kisses and small bites. Myka answered with a soft gasp, her hands in Helena's hair.

"Please…" she muttered, pulling Helena's mouth to hers. "Please…"

"This will be different, Myka," Helena said softly as she nipped at Myka's neck. "Some people find it overwhelming. Addictive, even."

That sounded pretty good to Myka, right then. Overwhelming, addictive. She answered by pulling at Helena's belt buckle, and after that, things became somewhat of a blur. Occasionally, Helena actually was a blur, moving so fast that Myka's brain could not adequately process it. The physical sensations were overwhelming, as Helena had warned. One moment she remembered perfectly clearly, however. Helena was on top of her, tongue and teeth playing with Myka's body, and Myka was urging her on, to stop teasing. Helena finally took her at her word. As Helena's cool fingers slipped inside her, the vampire's fangs entered her throat. The storm of sensations, of pure pleasure, made Myka cry out Helena's name. She had never felt anything like it before, and she had never expected to ever be able to feel like this, to enjoy the physical sensations with a lover without their thoughts getting in the way. And with Helena, the physical part was heightened both by her vampiric abilities and by the bite, which was a distinctly sexual experience in and of itself. Myka didn't recognise her own voice as she cried out her pleasure.

Eventually, Myka had to give in to her weariness. She was vaguely aware of Helena holding her like she was the most precious thing on earth. Myka was able to sleep without nightmares of dead children, and when she woke in the morning, it was to the lingering scent of jasmine, and as usual, a small note.

Myka

I appear to have wearied you so much that I could not even rouse you to tell you how much tonight meant to me. You are a wonder, my love. I will return at sundown.

Helena

Despite the horror of the previous day, a small smile lingered on Myka's face as she showered and ate breakfast. Her body ached and she was exhausted, but she felt whole somehow.

She made a stop at the ME's office before heading to the station. Dr Calder had nothing new to tell her. The woman was, for once, visibly disturbed. She'd ministered to the twin who'd gone missing all those months ago.

"You have to find this vampire, Sheriff," she urged, in a rough, low voice.

"I'm doing what I can, Dr Calder," Myka said, a touch exasperated. "I can't help it if there's no evidence or witnesses – I'm doing my best."

Dr Calder eyed her warily for a moment.

"Do you have another headache, Sheriff?"

"No, but I'm starting to get one!" Myka said, her eyes blazing.

"My apologies, Ma'am. I'll leave you to your work," Dr Calder said, clearly retreating from Myka's testy behaviour.

Myka sighed as she realised that she was being unreasonable. She took off her hat and scratched at her hair for a moment, squinting slightly.

"Sorry, Doc." She paused for a moment to gather her thoughts. "I guess this…whole thing has been affecting me a little more than I thought. It's hard, to deal with parents when they've lost someone. The grief – it's hard to…" she trailed off helplessly.

Dr Calder gave her a knowing look.

"I can imagine, Myka. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be questioning your commitment to this."

She put her hand on Myka's shoulder, startling the Sheriff slightly as Dr Calder's thoughts came into sharp focus as a result of the touch. To Myka's surprise, a distinct image of Arthur Nielsen came to mind, overlaid with sense of fondness for the man that definitely wasn't hers. She jerked back, staring at Dr Calder.

"You and Artie…you're together?" she asked, incredulously – both at the idea of this elegant, beautiful woman with the rumpled, moth-ball scented attorney, and at the sudden strength of her own ability. She wondered again if it was related somehow to the ingestion of vampire blood.

The doctor smiled at her.

"We've been married for a long time, Myka. He told me about this ability of yours but I was a little sceptical, even after all the years I've been with him. I've never seen the ability in a human before."

She seemed delighted to have startled Myka so much, and for some reason, her amusement tickled Myka. She began to laugh, and after a moment she had to sit down. Her abdominal muscles were aching; probably a result of her evening with Helena. Laughing was torture, but she couldn't seem to stop. She calmed down after a time, wiping her eyes.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you I knew, Myka," Dr Calder began. Myka held up her hand.

"It's okay, Doc. It seems like everyone around here knows more about me and about what's going on than I do. I'm starting to get used to it."

"Yes, well. Mrs Frederic likes to take care of her people. And I'm sure that the only people who know are those who need to. Don't worry; your secret is safe with me. After all, if I tell on you, you won't feel any obligation to keep Artie's secret, either."

Myka squinted at her in confusion.

"It's possible I'm being entirely dense here, Doc, but I have no idea what you're talking about."

Dr Calder smiled.

"Well, who else would be asked to train you in your gifts but another telepath?"

Myka thought about it – it made sense. But Dr Calder had just said that Myka was the only human telepath that she knew…so was Artie…?

"He's part demon."

Myka's eyes widened.

"Damn. I really have no idea what's going on, do I?" she said wonderingly, almost to herself.

Dr Calder laughed.

"I felt that way once, too, Sheriff. When I met Artie I had no idea about any of this business – vampires, weres, demons, fairies."

Fairies?

"But once you get used to it, it just seems normal." Dr Calder paused to consider that. "Well, not normal, exactly, but just part of life, I suppose. If you ever need any help with healing any supernatural creature, call me. Between Artie and myself we have probably dealt with just about any type you can imagine."

"Wow. I…I think I'm going to have to process this," Myka said, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"It'll get easier, Myka. I promise."

Dr Calder squeezed her shoulder and went to the wall station to pick up some purple latex gloves before returning to the cold room where the little girls' remains were waiting, leaving Myka in her office, lost in thought. After a few minutes of stunned silence, Myka came round and shook her head.

"Vampires and fairies and weres, oh my," she whispered to herself as she replaced her hat and set her shoulders to get on with her day.

She called Pete into her office, finding a coffee already waiting for her with one for Pete. She had long since given up working out how Leena knew these things, so she just smiled and shrugged. Maybe Leena could see the future.

"Pete, is there anyone who might be able to track these vampires through smell?" she asked once the office door was shut behind him.

"I don't know, Myka," he said, thoughtfully. "I can't tell one vamp's scent from the other, to tell you the truth. They smell all cold and spiky," he said with an exaggerated shiver. "But there might be other supes who can."

"Supes?" she repeated, raising an eyebrow.

"Supernatural creatures. That's pretty much what we all call ourselves," he said, picking at his teeth with his ever present toothpick.

"Okay. Could you make some enquiries with the local supes?" she asked.

He squinted doubtfully.

"I can ask, but I'm not really involved with the local packs, Sheriff. They might not take too kindly to an outsider asking questions," he said.

"Well, I'm happy for you to use my name, and maybe I can meet up with them and see if they might be willing to help us out from time to time, in exchange for us playing down these panther and bear sightings?" she said, thoughtfully.

Pete smiled slowly.

"You know, that's a really good idea, boss. I think I know just the guy to talk to."

"Okay," Myka said. "Can you let me know how you get on? The sooner, the better."

He nodded.

"Oh yeah, Mykes. I called two of my old buddies from the Marines. They have both worked in law enforcement elsewhere, and they are looking for work. You interested?"

Myka nodded.

"Can you get them down here?"

"Sure thing," Pete said.

He got up from his chair.

"By the way, boss. I meant to say, you got that…afterglow going on, this morning. Are those fang marks or are you just pleased to see me?" he said, winking.

He left the office before she had a chance to start yelling. She looked down, involuntarily, but the marks from Helena's fangs weren't on show. He could probably smell the marks healing or something. Asshole. She grinned after a moment, however. She couldn't stay mad at him. She had never felt like this about anyone. She had never felt this way with anyone, and Pete teasing her about it just made it feel more real. This past week or so (was it really only a week?) had passed like some sort of strange dream, and because she only ever saw Helena at night it made it feel a little like it had never happened. Her fingertips traced the sensitive marks at the base of her neck through her shirt, and she smiled a small smile as she remembered the night before.

Myka was half asleep, her body so relaxed it felt utterly boneless. She opened her eyes and allowed them to wander over the body of the woman next to her. Helena was lying on her side, holding her head up on one hand, elbow on the bed. She had a small smile on her face as she watched Myka trying to rouse herself.

"What are you looking at, lady?" Myka said playfully.

"A vision, my love," Helena said in response, the edges of her eyes crinkling. She was gloriously nude, her skin glowing white, and her eyes darker than Myka had ever seen them.

"You know how to charm a girl, that's for sure," Myka said, rolling her eyes a little.

Helena chuckled.

"Many, many years of practice. Almost 200 of them, in fact," she said, her smile slipping a little.

Myka moved towards her, grasping Helena's hips to pull their bodies together.

"Maybe you were just waiting for me," she said, kissing Helena languidly.

"Perhaps," Helena allowed, her eyes on Myka's. "You were certainly worth the wait."

She bent to kiss Myka again, and Myka's heart began beating more swiftly at the touch of Helena's tongue on hers. After a moment she broke away, trying not to gasp.

"No-one has ever…done that for me, before," she said, a little reluctantly. She wanted Helena to know what this night meant to her.

"Done what?" Helena asked, curiously.

"I have never…I could never let go, not entirely. I had fun with Sam, it was good. But it was never…like this. And anyone else…their thoughts just got in the way."

Helena frowned at her for a moment, and then gaped.

"You mean…you've never…?"

"Well, yes, but not with anyone else."

She hid her face in Helena's hair, suddenly shy.

Helena shook her head slightly in wonder.

"Is it inappropriate for me to say that I am glad that I am the one to have given you this?" Helena asked, her head dipping to allow her lips to meet Myka's neck.

"No," Myka said, gasping slightly, because Helena had started to touch her again, her hands roaming and leaving an intense desire in their wake.

"Good, because I am so very glad that I am the first person to have heard those delightful noises from your throat, Myka. I intend to coax them from you again," she said, her fangs extending again and nipping at Myka's skin, delightfully painful and dangerous.

And she had, over and over. By the time Myka was too exhausted for more, Helena was smug and smiling at her accomplishment, her arms cradling Myka close and her tongue lapping at the drops of blood left behind on Myka's neck from her earlier bites. The feeling was oddly soothing, and Myka let it lull her to sleep.