Chapter Eight


I don't know how many people enjoy being proved wrong –not that many- but I couldn't help but feel relieved to know that the person who I was corresponding with wasn't the person who I thought it would be.

I found it quite silly that I reacted the way I did when I left the letter two days ago in the same location as before. Yet, at the same time my interest was beginning to bud and I wasn't exactly sure if I wanted for it to be more that just that: an interest. By that I mean that I wasn't exactly sure if I still wanted to find out who this secret pen pal of mine is.

I had decided to stay behind after dinner in the Great Hall, where only half a percent of the student population did their homework. Crystal and Alice had left, knowing that, if they were to ask, I wouldn't have accepted their invitation to stroll around the school grounds.

I pulled out the letter from my book bag, eyeing the folded piece as I turned away from the Great Hall's entrance. Though I had already read it, I couldn't help but feel the need to reread it once more.

Well, I do have a younger brother, and cousins, and house-elves who just happen to be the apples of my parents' eyes... so don't feel too bad. And, I'm not getting into a novel description of that, so, don't ask

Anyway, only one particular person pops into your mind when mentioning "fear

of commitment"? And you don't know him? My, it sounds as though you have a crush on that particular guy... Of course, I'm not the only guy with commitment issues... Every guy my age is afraid of having their name in the same sentence as 'commitment'... it is one scary thought.

Your guy is considered handsome by the majority of the girls? Why, I'm a handsome guy... Sirius Black? You have a crush on Sirius Black? Bloody hell... I don't know whether I should feel sorry or laugh hysterically. I mean, no offense, but having a crush on him is pretty intense. And that is also not very good for his ego. I should know... I have to share a room with him every day...

Okay, my love life would be interesting if I had actually liked liked the girls I dated. But I really don't need to impress the girls I usually go out with considering the size of their brains... I don't have much trouble expressing myself to dim-witted... girls... But this girl... she's special. I mean, she's actually smart! And she's definitely not out of my league, she's just not what I'm used to dating (see above). It's scary because I don't know if I want to date her. Or if I just want the thrill of the chase.

Love, Alicia was the last girl I dated, the girl my roommates dated, the girl Hufflepuff guys dated, the girl Ravenclaw guys dated, the girl Slytherin guys dated. And I am most definitely NOT the last guy she dated... believe me, she's been around...

Anyway, I got to go now...

Not only did it calm me down (concerning the identity of the secret writer), but I couldn't help but notice something different. Perhaps it had to deal with the fact that he was sounding more like a flamboyant individual with the way he writes.

As I pulled out a parchment and a quill, I noticed that there were only about six people (including myself) left in the Great Hall though most of them where easily busy with whatever they where doing. I suppose today wasn't exactly the quota that makes the percent.

Just as I was placing the letter and my reply to it back into my book bag, someone I least expected decided to stop by.

"Crystal and Alice told me you where here." he said casually, as he sat across from me.

It has been nearly two weeks that I've been avoiding him so I can pretty much say that I was nervous if not abashed by his presence. "Yeah, I've been busy lately…"

"How've you been?"

Not only had I blatantly been avoiding him but he was nice enough to ask about my well-being. Yeah, that's a great beginning for a soon-to-be guilt trip.

"Good," I replied, replacing my book bag in the spot it once was on. "Yourself?"

"Same."

Silence, something that everyone knows can be quite awkward.

"I wanted to say that I didn't mean to..." It was apparent that he was the one feeling awkward, "I'll be honest, Belle…"

He followed to tell me what has been happening to him in the last couple of weeks. How he did have a crush on me but I didn't respond to him as he would have wanted.

As for Alicia, "it just happened", he told me. Since he has opened to me it was only the right thing that I do the same for him, giving him the reason why I was acting the way I was towards him. In the end there was still that awkwardness between us.

"We're still friends…?" He asked, finally interrupting that silence between us.

I smiled, "Of course."

He smiled. Up to now did I notice he has quite a smile.

"I have to go and leave something for someone," I said as I stood up, picking up my book bag along with me, "I'll see you around."

"She believed you?" asked Remus incredulously. "She actually believed that poorly written thing you called a letter?"

We had been through that same question approximately twenty seven times now but Remus was still in denial.

"Yes, Remus," I repeated with absolutely no emotion in my voice. "She believed the thing."

"Please read that letter again," he said, sounding quite hopeful that he heard wrong. "I refuse to believe she is that stupid."

Whoever said I had a crush on the guy who's afraid of commitment? I was merely pointing it out. Besides if I were to have a crush on said guy, you wouldn't exactly know the reason. Sure, you can pretty much guess but us girls (well, the most of) aren't exactly interested in getting into our crushes pants. I'm pretty sure that when it comes to you guys you tend to follow such mind track, but then again… I could be wrong.

"And I refuse to believe that teenage girls do not think about getting into their crushes pants," I said. "See? There is something for everyone."

Remus scowled.

I suppose guys and girls aren't so easy to figure out except though that some guys are more easily readable than girls. Mainly for the fact that guys are well… hormonal and so yeah… perhaps that's why your kind (for a lack of a better word) tend to just not appreciate such commitment. So I suppose in the end the human race isn't so easily readable.

"Why is she contradicting herself?" I asked aloud.

"Keep. Reading." said Remus almost painfully.

So now you've given me a clue as to who you are, well, a very vague one concerning your physical characteristic.

"Why… I'm a handsome guy…" mocked Remus. "That has seriously got to be the worst ego booster in history.

I glared at Remus before proceeding.

I should just add that to the list or better yet just poll the girls as to whom they find attractive. Whoever said I had a crush on Sirius Black? I merely mentioned his name but well… I suppose there's a tiny grain of truth with me mentioning his name. Yeah, I find it silly -if not ridiculous- that I "might" be crushing on the guy half of the girls in this school would like to be connected with. Its only looks though, for all I know he might be the most boring bloke a girl could know, unless he has something that will keep her there. You also happen to be sharing a room with him? Oh, look it here… you just gave me another clue… You aren't doing that on purpose, are you?

"Of course I am… you're supposed to think I'm James," I said matter-of-factly.

Liking a girl because she's different from the others you have dated isn't such a bad thing. Just get to know her (if you don't already) and go from there.

"Easier said than done," I said as Remus rolled his eyes.

Now if you aren't exactly so sure if it's the thrill or because you are genuinely interested in her, then just don't do either. Mainly so because you won't be wasting your time and you won't be breaking any more hearts. Come to think about it you never did tell me who this special girl is that is causing your dear head to worry about, do tell!

"Darling, it's you. It's obvious. Why do you torment yourself by believing lies? Why must you be as dim-witted as every other girl this guy has liked?"

"Are you and Crystal still together?" I asked Remus after he finished his rant.

"Yeah, why?"

"Because you sound like you need some mate," I told him.

"Of course I sound like I need some… I haven't gotten any."

It was one of those moments when confusion blanks out your brain and you don't know whether the correct reaction would be to laugh or to cry.

"Our relationship is not like yours are, Sirius," he said pointedly.

"Remus, you really don't want me to reply to that."

"I know. Keep reading."

I suppose I should thank you for giving me such information about Alicia. That was an unexpected way in telling me so.

"I told her I dated a whore. I told her I like someone. And now I'm pretending I'm someone else."

"And that's a good thing, is it, Sirius?" asked Remus innocently.

"Well… no… considering his dating history. Don't you dare say anything about mine" I warned, he raised his hands as in no-comment. "But I do not need my reputation tarnished by my correspondence with some chick."

"Why are you suddenly using words with more than two syllables?" asked Remus. "Oh, god." He started laughing uncontrollably.

"What?" I asked, visibly irritated.

"You really like this girl don't you?"

"Ladies and gentlemen… a round of applause for Remus Lupin please, as he has, in a record time of three weeks, realized that I actually meant it when I said I liked her."

"You like someone?" asked James, strolling into the room with a half eaten apple in his hand.

"Are you going to tell him or should I?" said Remus. I could only groan.

A/N: I have no words to describe how shocked I was this morning when I realized how long it had been since I last updated, considering, it felt like just yesterday I got like ten reviews and was so happy about it. Apparently I got a little too happy. But here it is, so, sorry about the delay.