DUDES AND DUDETS! I am aware that Angel's dad is a complete and total ass. I know this. But think about it: If he wasn't an ass, would I have a plot? The answer is no. See, what I'm tryin' to do is make like this little battle thing between Collins and Alejandro (love that name). Okay good people? Okay. Let the story continue.

I own nothing. The Almighty Larson owns it all.

Lying in bed next to Angel staring at the ceiling, Collins was using practically all of his brainpower to erase Alejandro's words from his head.

Sleep with your eyes open, boy.

Anytime he closed his eyes he saw the image of Alejandro glaring at him, trying to burn a hole through his head. He groaned, tossed, and turned, but nothing he did would allow him to sleep. Shifting so that he was once again on his back, Collins sighed and gently tapped Angel's shoulder.

"Ang?" he whispered. "Angel? Angel? Angel?" He got no response. "Angel?" Still no response. "Angel?" He waited thirty seconds. "Angel?" This time he waited a whole minute and when he didn't get an answer, he decided to raise his voice. "Goddamn-it Angel! ANSWER ME!" Angel stirred awake and turned around to face him.

"What?" she whispered.

"Are you awake?" Collins whispered back. Angel stared at him for the longest minute in the world. "Well, are you?"

"I have a right mind to slap you," Angel said, closing her eyes again.

"Ang, don't go back to sleep. I need to talk to you." Angel groaned and opened her eyes.

"What could you possibly want to talk about at," she briefly looked at the clock on the night stand next to the bed, "2:30 in the morning?"

"Your dad."

"What about him?"

"I'm not in the mood to beat around the bush, so I'll just say it. He don't like me."

"That's not true. My dad likes everybody cause my mom makes sure he does."

"I don't give a shit! He don't like me and you know it."

"Yes he does."

"No, he doesn't."

"Honey, ever since he's been here, he's been nothing but sweet to you."

"Ha! Don't make me laugh."

"He has."

"Yeah. When you're around."

"I'm not following."

"Whenever you're around, he acts all father-in-lawish. But when you're gone, it's a whole different story."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know when you took your mom to the room?"

"Yeah?"

"He insulted my intelligence by sayin' I don't know my ass from my elbow."

"Riiiiight."

"I'm serious! Then he told me to sleep with my eyes open. What the hell is that even supposed to mean?" Angel sat up and looked Collins in his eyes.

"Collins, just because you don't want my parents here doesn't mean you have to make up stories," she said sternly.

"I'm not makin' up anything, Angel. That man is out to get me," Collins told her. "You of all people should believe me."

"This conversation is over."

"But Ang–"

"End of discussion. Goodnight."

Around 10:30 a.m., Collins felt something touching his legs under the covers. It felt thick, heavy, and scaly. He lifted the covers cautiously to reveal a big, black boa constrictor that looked as if it was about to bite him.

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!" he yelled, tumbling out of the bed. Hearing Collins' outburst and the loud thump when he hit the floor, Angel immediately ran into the room.

"What happened?" she asked in a concerned voice.

"There's . . . a snake . . . on the bed," Collins said barely over a whisper. Angel looked on the bed and sighed.

"Aw, that's just Boa," she said, helping Collins of off the floor.

"Boa? It has a name?" Collins asked.

"Of course. All pets have names."

"Pet?"

"Yeah. Boa's been my friend for years, but I didn't think he'd like New York. So I left him with my parents. I can't believe how big he got."

"He wasn't in the apartment at all last night. How'd he get in?"

"Papá brought him in from the car. He slept there for a while."

"Your dad or the snake?" Angel giggled.

"The snake," she said. Alicia and Alejandro then entered the room.

"Is everything okay?" Alicia asked.

"Yes mamá. Collins just met Boa," Angel explained.

"Did he bite him?" Alejandro asked almost excitedly.

"No," Angel replied.

"That's good."

"How did he get in the bed with him?" Alicia asked.

"I was wonderin' the same thing," Collins said, staring at Alejandro.

"Oh, you know Boa. Always getting into trouble," Alejandro explained as Angel picked Boa up.

"He looks dehydrated," she said.

"Well, let's find him some water," Alicia suggested. She and Angel then left the room.

"What the hell is your problem!?" Collins asked Alejandro angrily.

"I'm sure I don't know what you mean," Alejandro replied somewhat innocently.

"You put that snake there! You tried to fucking kill me!"

"You should consider yourself lucky, boy. I don't usually fail."

"You're insane!"

"I'm not insane. Spiteful and a little vindictive, but never insane."

"You ain't the only one who can be vindictive."

"What are you trying to tell me?"

"Let's just say: You better watch your back. Two can play at this game."

"Bring it on."

After getting over the shock of waking up to find a boa constrictor about to attack him, Collins got dressed, went into the bathroom, searched through the medicine cabinet, and found a bottle of sleeping pills. He smiled evilly and pocketed them.

"Honey, I'm taking mamá out to show her around. Can I trust you to be nice?" Angel asked. Collins gave her a small kiss.

"Of course," he said. "I'm sure you were right. I'm probably just a little paranoid."

"I'll see you in a little while, kay?"

"Okay. Bye." Angel and Alicia waved goodbye and headed out the door. Alejandro soon emerged from feeding Boa.

"Angel and Alicia went out," Collins informed him. "I was told not to be naughty. So, can I get you anything?"

"I was going to ask you for something to drink, but I don't want you to hurt yourself," Alejandro said. Collins took a deep breath.

"No, it's okay. I got it," he said. "What do you want?"

"What do you have?"

"Beer, wine, vodka, orange juice . . ."

"I'll take the only nonalcoholic beverage you mentioned."

"Right. Be right back." Collins went into the kitchen, opened the cupboard, and took out a regular glass and a shot glass. He then took the sleeping pills out of his pocket, dropped one into the shot glass, and crushed it with the handle of a knife. After pouring some orange juice into the regular glass and mixing the now powder-fied pill in it, Collins went into the livingroom and gave the glass to Alejandro. "There ya go."

"Wow. You actually did it. I'm impressed," Alejandro said, taking a drink. About five minutes after he finished his glass of orange juice, Alejandro began to feel woozy. Noticing this, Collins pretended to be concerned.

"You okay?" he asked.

"I . . . don't know," Alejandro replied. He fell into a deep, deep sleep on the couch a minute later. Collins poked him a few times before dragging him down the three flights of stairs and across the street. He then laid him in an ally and patted him on the back.

"Have a nice nap," he said with a smile.

WOOT! Hooray for updating! I updated it's almost midnight and I'm goin' to sleep! I got exams tomorrow! DAMN EXAMS! Hey, that rhymed! Anyway, review please and I'll do something amazing! I'LL UPDATE TOMORROW! That's amazing, right? :)