JJ seized the opening created but the laughter and commotion. She pulled Hotch off to the side again for a private chat. Once she got him alone however, all the thoughts swirling in her mind since he made the announcement were lost. Hotch waited patiently for her to gather her thoughts as the sounds of Emily being grilled about Interpol drifted towards them.
"I guess this is above Cruz's pay grade and we can't fight to get you back?" JJ looked up at Hotch slowly trying to keep her face neutral. His goodbye when she left for the DOD was playing in her mind.
"Yes. The Director wanted to feel like he was in charge." Hotch gave her a small smirk.
"Then it's my turn to say how much we value your work and I will miss you," JJ's voice was full of emotion.
"Getting soft on me JJ?" Hotch was surrounded by strong, determined people but he came to learn that JJ was head and shoulders above the rest with her resolve. "You know the boys won't let us go more than a week without seeing each other." Since Jack and Henry started at the same school two years earlier they had been inseparable. There were some days when Hotch felt like he had two kids. He and JJ even tried to confer on house rules to avoid confusion.
JJ shook her head and Hotch saw something shift in her eyes. "Hotch… uh," she started slowly. "I'm happy that Emily is back but why?" Her tone left him no question about what she was asking.
"The Brass was pushing for an outsider. I couldn't do that to the team," Hotch said softly with a small shake of his head. "I didn't promote internally because Rossi doesn't want it and doesn't put up with petty politics, I don't think Reid could handle putting his family in dangerous situations and the other two don't have enough experience. With Emily there is less transition; she has the leadership and she already knows all of you."
"What about me?" JJ demanded.
"You are an excellent profiler, you know all the paperwork, and you handle the locals well but this job is tough. It requires more sacrifices." Hotch tried to keep his voice as even as possible to counter act her anger. He knew that when JJ was agitated it was best to stay out of her way and do what she wanted.
"So you didn't think I could handle it?" JJ cocked an arm on her hip and leaned in threateningly.
"No. I know you can. You would have said yes and found a way to make it work but at what cost JJ?" He let out a forceful sigh. "I know you have Will at home to help, but you have two little boys who need you."
"That's not your decision to make!" she whispered harshly. "I can decide what is too much for my family."
"I don't want you to turn out like I did." He stared her down. JJ stared back, the anger all over her face. "This job took my marriage, most of my friends, part of my hearing, the women I've loved and it almost took my son." He couldn't let another person he cares for hurt like he has if he could help it.
"We shouldn't do this right now, Aaron." she huffed. "We should be celebrating that we got Emily back."
"You'll be running more than this unit one day, JJ," he called softly as she walked away. "You know that right?" JJ paused and threw a sad smile over her shoulder at him. They both knew that in an hour things would be alright. Then the next day they would get coffee and talk things over.
Not wanting to explain his decision again, Hotch made his way inside to check on the three boys. He needed a break from all the emotions that were pouring out of everyone. It was expected there would be a lot of strong reactions to his leaving and Emily's homecoming, Hotch just didn't like the attention directed at him.
"Hey you." He caught Emily coming out of the bathroom in the hallway.
"Hey," Hotch responded more as a sigh rather than an actual word.
"Want to talk about it?" she asked gently.
He pulled her into a hug. "Garcia blew out what hearing I had left in my left ear. JJ is pissed. Luke and, I'm sure Reid, is disappointed."
"They got big news today. Give them time." She laid her head against his chest enjoying the fact that she didn't have to hide this anymore. "You have been the one constant on this team."
"Have I told you how happy I am that you came home?" He push her back a little to look at her face. It made leaving much easier knowing they would be in good hands.
"Yes, but you can tell me again later tonight," she winked and made her way outside.
He watched her go, thinking about how different this would be without her by his side. Hotch found Reid in the living room showing the boys magic tricks to squeals of delight. He watched silently from the doorway for a few minutes. It was great to see Jack enjoying himself after months of fighting and turmoil.
"Dad! Can Henry and I stay at Uncle Dave's tonight?" Jack asked as he spotted his Dad in the doorway.
"I'm sure Uncle Dave is fine with it so If JJ and Will say ok then you can."
"Uncle Spencer, do you want to join our sleep over? Dave always makes us French toast!" Henry practically shouted.
"Are we going to play Grand Theft Auto?" Spencer asked with a wide smile. Both boys nodded vigorously. "Ok, I'm in. I'm going to hang out with Emily for a bit and I'll be back." Reid gave them a little wave and headed for the hallway.
Hotch backed a few steps away from the doorway as Reid came through. "Reid." It came out more apologetic than he intended.
"You don't need to explain to me why you're leaving," Reid said flatly as he came to a halt and facing Hotch. "I get it." He gave a small nod.
Hotch looked him over. "Does it help that I brought Emily back?"
"A little." It was punctuated with a shrug and a grin. Hotch was sure that if the team had to pick between the two Emily would win every time.
"I'll be around all the time. I'm only leaving the unit. When we have bar nights or family dinners, I'll be there," Hotch promised. It was one of the deals he made with himself when he took the offer. The team would always be his family. He wasn't walking away from them, just the job. "You can continue Jack's magic lessons. I swear there was a two month stretch where he only talked to me about hanging out with you." There was a ghost of a grin on Hotch's face. Those months were painful but knowing that Reid was a bright spot in Jack's life soothed his heart a little.
"OK," Reid nodded. "I am really happy for you. About all of it. The new job, more time for Jack, you and Emily."
"You are going to do just fine without me. Not just as a team, but individually. It has been a pleasure watching you grow into yourself over the last fourteen years." Hotch held out his hand to Reid and was pleasantly surprised by a hug. Their connection wasn't as brotherly or affectionate as the one Reid shared with Morgan. It was mostly expressed through silent support and tough love. If they had learned anything over the last few years it was to show appreciation when you can.
"You're going to be fine without us too," Reid said softly before he released his friend.
"We should get back. I'm sure Emily is telling more embarrassing stories about me."
"Better you than me," Reid laughed as the opened the patio door.
They joined the group as they made idle conversation around the fire pit. Hotch came up to Emily's side and wrapped an arm around her waist. Emily kissed his cheek and leaned into him slightly. The couple was unabashedly cuddling despite the stares from their friends.
"What? No cryptic comments?" Hotch asked Rossi after he felt the older man eyeing him for a few minutes. It was unusual for his best friend to remain silent this long when their was something big going on in his life. Dave's favorite past time was meddling.
"No. This whole happy and relaxed thing you have going on is throwing me off." Rossi took a sip of his scotch. "It looks good on you by the way."
"Feels good too," Hotch replied with a wide smile. He was having a hard time keeping the happiness off his face.
"Who would have thought that we would have all this?" Rossi gestured to their friends surrounding them. It was a sentiment they both shared but rarely verbalized, which is how most things between them were. They were unlucky in love workaholics whose job made it hard for them to trust and open up. And now they both had a loving family, one of their own and together with the team. The BAU had taken many things from them but it also gave them something it could never take away.
Hotch could only nod in response and he tightened his grip on Emily's waist. She had been absorbed in a conversation with Garcia and Tara but wrapped her fingers around his at the pressure. It was these, seemingly little, gestures that Hotch adored. It was the way a touch or a smile from across the room would calm him. And how Emily always knew when he needed it.
It was Garcia's high pitched squeal that broke him from his thoughts.
AN: There will be one more after this so everyone can get their goodbyes.
Tannerose & RMPCMFAN: I'm hoping the vague "another assignment" BS was only for when he was suspended and they will have a better answer for him being permanently gone. Oh and to the guest who left a ranty review about how they aren't this chummy in real life: it's about the characters, not the actual actors.
