This story is beta'd by Sunflower Fran.
Chapter 22
Furtive (Adj.) attempting to avoid notice or attention, typically because of guilt or a belief that discovery would lead to trouble; secretive.
Why do I feel lied to and betrayed?
Why can't my 'friend' go on a date without me losing my shit?
Why can't I forget about Edward Cullen?
Questions I asked my friends aloud as they painted their nails and listened to my never-ending rant.
"Bella, chill out! It's just a date, sweetie." Rose says through pops of her gum. "Nothing will come of it." She says then begins blowing on her toes and fanning them with her hands to dry.
"Why did I have to find out about his date from Alice? Why didn't he tell me himself? We're friends... sort of."
"Bella it's no secret. Tanya has had her eyes on him since he moved here. He's just been so wrapped up in someone else I know." Alice says, rolling her eyes at the end for emphasis.
"Wrapped up in who? What does that last part mean?"
"What are you, an idiot? Bella, he's ridiculously in love with you." Alice says, shaking her head at me for good measure.
"And don't forget the other part, Alice," Rose says, smiling brightly, popping her gum again.
"Oh, right and you love him too." She says it like it's nothing, but instantly I freeze and zone out, practically having a heart attack.
Love him?
Do I love him?
What does that mean?
I have feelings for him?
"No, I-" I start to say, but words evade me. "We just care about each other."
"So, why are you pacing the floor again?" Rose asks at the same time Alice asks. "Why don't you want him to go on this date with Tanya?"
"I don't know!"
Rose sighs in frustration. "At least do us all a favor and admit you like the guy. That would be an improvement."
I stand there and think back on every last memory I have of Edward. I think back to our initial texts, and then to how we sang to each other, and then we met at the beach all those months ago. I think back to how that first kiss made me feel and how I have tried my hardest ever since then to ignore it. I think back to his words, and his actions; then to my words, my actions, my reactions...
"Oh no!" I whine, my heart pounding at the thought of the words threatening to spill from my lips. I palm my forehead and then smack myself, "Oh God, oh God! Noo!" I bend at the waist and dry heave.
"Fuck, Fuck, Fuck!"
"Babe, what's wrong?" Rose asks from her seat on the floor. I look up to see the concern on her face, and then I glance at Alice, who looks sick with worry.
I stand straight and look at the ceiling with my hands covering my eyes. My stomach is literally in knots as I say the words.
"I love him."
"Well duh!" Alice says, and I feel her beside me rubbing my back. I look over at her and pout.
"This is gonna hurt like a bitch."
Alice's mom heard about the videos and banned her from doing them anymore. Even though Alice is eighteen, she still lives with her so the rules are still to be followed.
Alice also could not go out on the weekends as a part of her punishment. However, she could have friends over. Esme was skeptical of me, only because she'd heard that all of the videos had been filmed at my home, and she was worried I was pressuring Alice to enter pornography. It was the furthest thing from the truth, but I didn't have it in me to explain.
Around eleven at night, Edward entered the house and made his way upstairs toward his room. I could hear his footsteps, and I waited with baited breath for him to pass Alice's room to get to his just so I could get a glimpse of him.
As he passed, he yawned and glanced into Alice's room where the girls were sound asleep. With wide eyes, he stopped dead in his tracks when he sees me.
Then he turns and leans his shoulder against the door frame. "Moving in?" He says, with a slow easy smile spreading across his face.
I grin at him and roll my eyes. "I wish I could live here. You guys have a pool."
"Esme has a pool." He says, and I tilt my head to the side, understanding his unspoken words.
"Do you not feel at home here?"
He shrugs and runs a hand through his hair looking uncomfortable.
"My dad was a struggling artist when they met online two years ago. She has money, he doesn't."
"But they're married so it becomes their money."
He nods. "Still..." He trails off looking away from me.
"So..." I trail off trying to figure out how to bring up his date.
"So..." He repeats my words and then the grin is back on his face.
"Can you two go flirt in his room? We're trying to sleep." Alice says, and I laugh, Edward does as well. Then he motions for me to follow him. I stand from my place on the floor, feeling self-conscious in my shorts and tank top.
When Edward opens his door, he ushers me in first, and I take a look around at all of the artwork he has on the walls. My eyes then move to the shelf of books, then to all of his surfing trophies. Letting my eyes take in his entire room I'm moving in a circle to take everything in before allowing my eyes to rest on his handsome face.