*** This chapter switches to first-person perspective

Darkness.

Darkness was my only companion. They couldn't throw me in Azkaban since that was still controlled by the, now corrupted, ministry. It felt as if I was chained. The members of the Order argued about what to do with me, but ultimately, this place was chosen.

It was peaceful there. I had time to think. I had been separated from my family, the Death Eaters. I hoped my father had succeeded in his plan. Soon I would be out of the dark, and I would be safe.

Light.

Light shone through the crack in the door. It burned my eyes. How long had I been in there? Days, weeks? I couldn't tell.

A homely woman came in and took me out of the room, and to a dining table. There was a plate full of food in front of where I sat.

At the other end of the table, a dark man, who looked familiar, sat. His eyes were tired. He looked upset.

He spoke in his deep voice. "Hello"

"Hello"

"You may be wondering why you are here."

My voice was raspy as I spoke. But I was determined to keep my composure. "You're going to kill me, correct?"

"No. I am here to find out about your past. Who are your parents?"

"The Dark Lord and Bellatrix Lestrange" I had decided to be cooperative.

"Why were you a death eater?"

Annoyed at his use of the past tense I replied, "I am a death eater because at first he threatened my family, but now I realize it's my destiny."

"Do you realize, Voldemort is defeated."

Shock ran through my body along with, terror, relief, and sadness. I spoke, "No! You're lying. Who has done this?"

He looked alarmed at my anguish, "Harry Potter finished him."

"Potter, he killed him. My father is dead?"

"Miss McGee, you don't have to serve him anymore. He's not going to kill your family." He was looking at me with such pity, it made my stomach turn.

I looked at him with disgust. "I serve him because I wish to. No one forces me to. Not anymore."

He looked at me sadly as he stood up and walked out the door. I sat there for a minute and then a boy walked in. He had a lightning scar on his forehead. Next came a girl with unkempt hair, then a red-haired boy with freckles. They all wore their hearts on their sleeves. All three were looking at me like I was a feral animal.

He muttered to the three. "I don't believe there is any hope. But, you can try." With that, the man left my eyesight.

I recognized their faces from a past life. I spoke, "Harry? Hermione? Ron?"

"Clare, it's over. The war is over." Harry spoke. Hearing my voice so familiarly gave him hope, I could see it on his face.

"You're free." Hermione said. She was smiling at me.

"Free is a relative term. I'm still chained, to all the people I've killed." My voice was calm and unfeeling. Funny thing, I sounded like my father.

They all shuddered when I said that. It reminded me of how I used to shudder at my father or mother's words.

I spoke. "You can't save me from who I am. I'm his daughter. His blood, ambitions, and goals run through my veins."

"You aren't defined by his decisions." Ron said.

"I wasn't. But, spending time in his service has changed my outlook on life. His aspirations were good and bad in some ways."

Harry scorned my words, "and how are his ways good?"

In my eyes he was just an ignorant child. Even with his life's tragedies, he hadn't faced what I had. "Oh Harry, good and evil aren't as black and white as you think they are."

"Actually they are." He spat.

"Oh really? Would you consider me evil? I became a Death Eater to save my family… I was tortured so often that I was often not in my right mind. Even now what I say may not be really how I feel."

They all looked horrified from the question I presented. They had never taken the time to think outside of themselves. Taking advantage of their shocked silence I spoke.

"I also feel that apologies are in order. Hermione, I am truly sorry that I stood there and watched you suffer. I should have stopped my mother. But, then again, there were a lot of things in my life that should have happened."

Hermione's face showed with fear as she remembered her torture by Bellatrix. She looked conflicted about what to say then she spoke, "I know you didn't have the power, and that's okay. But, what happened to you. We were so close. How did you become this?"

My face filled with sadness. "I was always this person. The girl you got to know was just a shadow of my true self. I haven't been her since my fourth year."

They all saw my remorse, but I quickly hid it. "Clare you can go free if you'll just explain that you were being forced by your father to serve him." Ron attempted to reason with me.

"This is where I belong. I will carry on my father's work to overthrow the ministry."

Hermione looked horrified as she said, "What about muggle-borns?"

I answered "They live, because they are magical and are capable wizards."

Abruptly, the trio left the room and I was alone. No one else came to visit me, till two wizards came and took me to my dark prison. I cried out fiercely "Not back into that hellhole where there is no night or day! Please!"

When the two men left me, I shed my skin and began to cry. My whole world was gone. My family, my friends, my adopted family would no longer call me their own, and I had lost my cause. All I had left were my own ambitions. So I waited. And waited. Till the same woman came and took me to the same room, where I was greeted, by my adopted father.

This man I had loved and adored for such a long time, then abandoned so briefly sat in front of me. Yet, his face was distant. He looked like a mess, almost like he'd been working non-stop. My old self screamed within me to go hug him and cry in his arms, but my veins kept me rigid in my seat.

"Hello" I managed. My voice almost broke.

"Hello Clare" His voice wasn't cutting, but loving. However, the love cut deeper.

"Where's Joe" I was afraid to ask, but I had to know where my once beloved brother was.

"Your brother is at a wizard hospital, recovering from the final battle at Hogwarts."

Relief rushed through me. I changed the subject. "Did you bury her?"

His face filled with pain. "Yes, she was buried at the cemetery in town."

"Oh"

His face changed from pain to anger. "You know your mother loved you more than anything. She never cared that you were born from such horrible people. She never treated you differently and this is how you repay her? Turning on us and killing her."

His eyes were piercing into my soul. I couldn't hold his gaze. I could look into the eyes of my enemies, even my father, but not this man who had loved me.

"I didn't kill her" I said quietly, holding on to that technicality.

He began to yell at me furiously "You might as well have stabbed her through the heart! You brought him to our new house and you let him kill her!" By this time tears were streaming down his face. The death of his wife was affecting him greatly. He had never shown this much emotion, let alone cry, in front of me. He was always the stable one, and she was the emotional one. It shocked me.

"Dad" I said softly.

"Clare, I don't understand why you would do this."

"They threatened you and mum and Joe. I couldn't let that happen, so I joined. Then, I began to love what I was doing. I was good at it. It was natural. I had the authority to order others around… You both always said I was born to lead."

"We encouraged you to lead, but we never wanted you to become…" He stuttered. "This. You could have finished your education and worked at the ministry, or taught at Hogwarts and become the headmaster."

"You say yourself the Ministry is corrupt. I didn't agree with most of my father's views, but that one was correct. The ministry must be overthrown. I will not give up my convictions."

"Overthrowing the ministry would only cause madness, you know that."

"But I wouldn't do it by murdering mudbloods and such. I would do it by capturing the corrupt people and teaching the world a less biased view."

His gaze wavered. "Well, they are going to put you in Azkaban for what you have done. But, I may be able to assist you in a shorter sentence than life."

"You would do that?"

"I may not want to, but your mother loved you even when we discovered your new hobbies. Also I'm sure your brother will want to see you again."

I knew there would be a catch. So I asked, "What will I have to do?"

"You'll have to explain your situation to the Minister and then give up names of death eaters."

"No."

He spoke harshly at me. "Don't be a fool, all you have to do is give a detailed account of the last six years, including names and places."

"No" I very well couldn't give up the names of the people that I had come to know.

"Please Clare. We're still your family. I don't want to have to send you to prison."

His eyes were pleading me. I wanted to believe that I could just forget the horrors of the past years. But they defined me. They shaped me into who I was.

I spoke quietly. "You can go now."

He stood up slowly. As he left the room, I added. "I will reconsider."

I assumed the visiting had ended when they took me back to my cell. One of the men spoke before they closed the door. "Your court date is in two weeks, choose your words wisely."

After they left, I was no longer visited. Food and water appeared in my room daily. However, I was left to my own devices.

Given time to think, I began to look over my life. All the things I had done. All the people I had met. Could I really abandon the people who had raised me? What about those who had been my companions for the last three years?

Now that I was free to make my own choice, who would I stick by?

I pondered these things for the following weeks, attempting to make the life-changing decision.

At the end of those two weeks, I knew what I would choose. I knew who my real family was.