Author's Notes: No sooner had I finished posting the previous chapter than Obi-Wan was telling me about how his meeting with the Council went (trust me, while they're talking, I'm listening). And of course, this is also where Merit starts feeling her way toward her various missions, even ones that Anakin didn't give her (technically speaking). I hadn't really thought about it until I started working on this chapter, but Merit compares herself to Leia a lot. When she was younger, it was an attempt to draw on her grandmother's strength … now, it's to remind herself that she needs to keep moving forward, when all she wants to do is curl up and cry. Meanwhile, both Knights are starting to notice their attraction to each other. Don't expect anything to come of it yet … Obi-Wan needs time to come to terms with the relaxing of the Code and Merit needs to come to terms with the recent changes in her life (including the losses of Ral and Aidan, as well as Thane). As to Aidan and Ami, I hope to check in with them soon … once they tell me when they are and what they're doing. So. In this chapter, Obi-Wan learns the truth about his new friend and fellow Knight; Merit tries to move past her grief to fulfill her mission and honor her brother; and the Council begins to chart a new path.
Chapter Eighteen
The Sacred Mission
"Time, it is."
Newly-minted Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi stared at Master Yoda, feeling more than a little unbalanced by the pronouncement. It didn't help that Master Windu was … smirking. Yes. Yes, that was a definite smirk. His mas … his former master's age mate observed, "No need to worry, Knight Kenobi. Yoda's just being playful … but he's right, it is time for you to know." Know … what? Obi-Wan couldn't help feeling a frisson of anxiety, especially when the Jedi Master known to be stoic added, "It's time you knew the truth about Merit Solo."
Knew the truth about Merit? Obi-Wan was starting to develop a Very Bad Feeling. When he left his new partner in the quarters they were sharing (neither of them were used to being alone) for this early morning meeting with the Council, she'd been sound asleep. He hadn't the heart to wake her, especially since he knew she wasn't sleeping well. He often sensed her nightmares in the Force, and refused to bring them up to her. He only had to think of how he would have reacted if it was Master Qui-Gon. No. No, he wouldn't tell Merit that her nightmares often woke him. Her brother died to save his Master … this was the absolute least he owed her.
But that still didn't clarify what Master Windu meant by the truth about her. Force knew, there were plenty of mysteries surrounding the newest addition to the Jedi Temple. Master Fisto explained, "There are certain things about Knight Solo which you aren't aware of … in the past, it was because you were a padawan. Even Masters aren't aware of the full truth regarding our new Jedi. But because the Council has decided to partner the two of you together, we've decided you should know the truth. She will need you in coming days, as she tries to make sense of her new reality." Somehow, Obi-Wan was getting the feeling that they didn't just mean the loss of her brother and their entrance into this galaxy.
He expected any number of things … however, the words that came out of Master Windu's mouth next never even approached those few expectations. The youngest ever councilor said quietly, "Knight Merit Solo is not from another galaxy, Obi-Wan. She is from the future." From … the … future? Obi-Wan controlled his desire to deny that it was even possible, and focused on what he knew. Fact … the Solo team arrived under odd circumstances. Fact … the countless times when Merit would start to say something, only to choose different words. Fact … Thane Solo's body vanished in his sister's arms after he died. But the deciding factor was the Force itself, which all but sang around him as this truth was revealed.
Merit Solo was from the future. There was a brief moment where he wondered if Bant knew, but he dismissed that. If she did, she was sworn to silence, just as Merit likely was. There was no resentment for her honoring that vow. It wasn't her story to tell, and Merit was trying to do the right thing by respecting the Council. And he knew now. Obi-Wan asked slowly, because nothing else made sense, no other explanation made any sense, "Is her future really so terrible, then?" The words were no sooner out than he was overwhelmed with … too much. Sights, sounds, emotions, smells. Terror, grief, rage, horror, pain. So much pain. There were images of a young-looking man with sandy hair and a once-handsome face twisted with hatred and desire. In spite of himself, Obi-Wan marked his face … he had the sense that he would be seeing that man again. When he regained his senses, he was lying flat on his back in the Council Chambers, staring up into the concerned faces of Mace Windu and Kit Fisto. Well, if that wasn't incredibly embarrassing! However, he wasn't as worried about the embarrassing aspect of it. Instead, he breathed, "Dear Force … did all of that come from Merit?"
"It did. Much of what we told you was the unvarnished truth. Merit and Thane's father was a Sith. They did come here to ensure that we would not meet the same fate as their galaxy. Understand, Obi-Wan, that her position here is somewhat precarious, especially after Chancellor Valorum's death. I don't think it's much of a coincidence that he died only days after choosing to assist Queen Amidala … and days after he met with Merit. If the Sith were to find out that a young Jedi from nearly a hundred years into the future came back in time to ensure that the Jedi and the Republic never fell, her life would be forfeit," Master Windu answered.
Of course it would. And that was when it occurred to him. The Sith. Merit knew who the Sith was. He started to ask as the Masters helped him to his feet, but Yoda waved a tiny, clawed hand, saying, "Asked her, we have. Tell us, she cannot. Not will not. Cannot. Forbidden to tell us, she is. But tell us this, she did … killed the apprentice, you have. Remains, the Sith Lord. Save ourselves, we must. Help us, she will." That … made a terrifying amount of sense to Obi-Wan, who realized one other thing in the wake of Master Windu's statements (along with the fact that the Master addressed him by his given name).
"So … I'm not just to be her partner. I'm also her protector," he observed and Master Windu inclined his head with a smile. Well. That made his life more complicated. He was keenly aware that Merit was a very lovely young woman … he'd heard more than one member of the Naboo Air Corps call her 'beautiful. He' was aware for several weeks that he was growing attracted to her. He was also aware that acting on those feelings (setting aside the implications of breaking the Code for now) would be a colossally Bad Idea. Merit was reeling from the loss of her brother and her home (and random comments from her brother before his death led Obi-Wan to the conclusion that there was someone whom Merit left behind). And Obi-Wan … his forays into such things never ended well. Cerasi. Satine. Siri. He didn't want to add Merit to that list.
Well. He was a Jedi Knight, and this was the life he chose. He would protect Merit from the Sith, and his heart from the damage it would take by allowing himself to fall in love with her. However, as usual, the Force had other plans.
SWSWSWSWSWSWSW
Obi-Wan already left their quarters when Merit woke. She lay in bed for a few minutes, miserably aware that she was being self-indulgent, and not really caring. She had a meeting with the Council later that day, and she had to think about what to say to them … and how to hide the other reason for her exhaustion. They would understand her nightmares. She wasn't sure they could handle the extremely explicit dreams she had about her roommate and new partner. There was no doubt in her mind that they would find those thoughts highly inappropriate.
The worst part of it was, she wasn't even aware of having those feelings about Obi-Wan until last night. Sure, he was nice-looking … but this was Obi-Wan Kenobi they were talking about, for Force's sake! She had no business of having dreams about him kissing his way down her body (much less the very naughty thoughts she had about what she'd like to do to his body). She belonged to the family who put Obi-Wan through hell, along with the rest of the galaxy. That was something Andriu liked to bring up when he beat her … even though her grandmother and great-uncle helped to save the galaxy from Palpatine, the galaxy wouldn't have need saving if it wasn't for her great-grandfather. She came from a diseased line, which should have died out before Anakin Skywalker was even born. She ever so helpfully pointed out to him that he worked for a member of that diseased line, and was beaten into unconsciousness for her trouble. When she came to, Thane was screaming in several different languages at Andriu.
Merit shuddered and forced herself to return to the present (or rather, the past). While she had on illusion that she was safe from her father here, she was safe for now, and she had to focus on protecting the Jedi of the past. Despite the fact that meditating had become nearly impossible since Thane's death, Merit forced herself into a sitting position and focused on her connection to the Force. Now that she wasn't constantly on the run for her life, her connection to the Unifying Force had strengthened greatly. It welcomed her, as if welcoming a long-missed daughter home, and suddenly, she was seeing things that she shouldn't have been able to see … of young Jedi forced to leave the only home they knew because they weren't wanted.
Oh, she knew from her conversations with Bant and her age-mates that there weren't enough Masters to go around. She also believed with all her heart that her mother was right when she said that all servants of the Force were chosen for something. Growing food and researching ways to grow more food with fewer resources was a noble cause. But those children sent (for instance) to the AgriCorps … didn't that make them more vulnerable to Dark Side users? Wasn't there another way to utilize the talents of those children? She honored the traditions of the past, but a new way had to be found going forward. If the Jedi fell, who would protect those other Force users? What happened to the unchosen Jedi padawans after the first Jedi Purge? Were they hunted down and killed as well? Anakin charged her with the protection of the Jedi younglings … whether he wanted her to or not, she would take a wide view of that, and sensed the Force's approval in her plans.
When she opened her eyes to find herself back in the quarters she shared with Obi-Wan, Merit knew what she had to do. The trouble was, how did she do it/say it diplomatically? She had to be very careful about making changes. Number one, while the Council now knew and accepted that she was from the future, and they trusted her (mostly), she still had to be careful about not being an upstart and demanding that they change. She had to do this the proper way. Which led to point number two … she could well make things worse while trying to make things better. (She didn't ask how things could possibly be worse … things could always be worse. Always)
Hopefully, that would take care of itself. For now, she headed into the 'fresher, with the intention of washing away the tear-stains from her cheeks. Yes, she was from the future. Yes, she'd just lost her brother and the only family she had remaining. That didn't mean she wanted to go into the Council Chambers with puffy red eyes and a tear-stained face. She was the granddaughter of Leia Organa Skywalker Solo, and her grandmother had moved forward after far more devastating losses. Merit wasn't about to shame that particular legacy.
After washing and changing, she headed into the kitchen for a quick breakfast. When she was a very little girl, her mother and grandmother often made big breakfasts, because it was the most important meal of the day. But as she grew older, those gave way to much smaller ones … in part because she was always on the run, but also because she didn't like to eat a lot in the morning. It slowed her down too much. She ate a quick meal, cleaned up after herself, and checked her chrono. Three hours before her meeting with Council. She had time to explore.
And the Jedi Temple was a wonder for her to explore! The exterior was beautiful of course … in fact, when they'd returned from Naboo, only the sight of the stately Jedi Temple broke through her grief, because she'd never seen it before. While Anakin had been reassigned to Master Jinn, he tucked himself against her side and refused to leave her until they reached the Temple. I know you're sad now, Merit, he told her in a soft voice as he curled up in her lap, and I know you miss your brother. I miss my mom. And I know that Master Qui-Gon will be a good Master. But you'll always be my sister. Always.
Technically speaking, had her brother lived, she would have been both aunt and sister to the little boy. But she didn't speak of that, and instead, hugged him tightly. She was well aware that Master Jinn didn't trust (or like) her. She was also aware that he wanted Anakin to have nothing to do with her (and argued with Yoda about the new Chancellor's involvement in his new padawan's life) … she would respect his wishes. But if Anakin came to her, she wouldn't turn him away. She told Jinn as much. He wasn't particularly impressed. Nor was she.
When she wasn't exploring, she was returning to the crèche, so the younglings would get used to seeing her. Yes, there were thirteen years until the fall of the Republic (assuming her own actions didn't hasten it) … but the babies and younglings here now would be padawans at that time, and Master Drallig needed to get used to her as well. Finally, it was time for her to head to the Council Chambers. Reluctantly, she handed the Togruta baby she was cuddling back to Master Drallig, rose to her feet and straightened her shoulders before taking her leave. Even as she left, she was cataloging not just the exits, but the possible hiding places.
She arrived at Council Chambers ten minutes before her scheduled meeting … just as Obi-Wan was leaving. He looked pale and drawn, and there was something in his eyes when he looked at her that wasn't there before. It felt as if her heart stopped … he knew. She whispered, "I …" She wasn't entirely sure how she would have finished that sentence, just that she was sure Obi-Wan would have a hard time forgiving her for keeping the whole truth from him. But he surprised her. His bright eyes were filled with compassion, not a drop of anger or even resentment. He knew and … ?
"There is no reason for you to be sorry, Merit. You didn't know me, didn't know if you could trust me, and the Council wanted you to keep silent. Remember, we talked about this when you arrived … after Anakin and Master Qui-Gon were tested by the Council. There is no reason for you to be sorry, there is nothing to forgive. Are … are you all right?" Obi-Wan asked. In spite of herself, tears began to fill her eyes, tears that Merit angrily dashed away with the back of her hand. Dammit, she was so tired of crying! And yet, there were still so many tears left in her. Not just over her brother's death, but over every time she'd been impatient with him, or resented him for whatever silly reason, or teased him over something equally silly.
"I don't … I don't know. And I don't know if I'll ever feel normal again, because I don't remember what normal feels like. Up until Thane's death, I was starting to feel safe again … for the first time since our father's troops killed our mother and our grandparents, I felt safe. Oh, I know, I'm a Jedi … being safe isn't part of the territory. And feeling safe … that's just an illusion. But …" Merit began, before falling silent. She rubbed at her face again, though her cheeks were dry. And that was when Obi-Wan surprised her again.
"But for the first time since you were a very small girl, you felt like you might have a home. I … I know what it's like to lose my home. We're not supposed to have attachments to people or to things, but leaving where you grew up … as odd as it might sound, I do understand, Merit. And I swear on my life, on my oath as a Jedi, that I will do whatever I can to help you," he said quietly. And then he actually squeaked (very softly) as Merit threw her arms around him in a fierce hug, but his arms slipped around her waist.
"Thank you," she breathed, "Thank you, thank you, thank you." Obi-Wan merely tightened his arms around her, before releasing her and stepping back. He, like her, sensed the Force presence on the other side of the door. She brushed a wisp of hair away from her face before releasing a breath and called upon the Force. To her surprise, Obi-Wan noticed something off about her clothing and after a quick glance asking permission, arranged the items properly. He smiled at her a bit shyly, and she smiled back, murmuring again, "Thank you … some of these extra bits of clothing are a bit confusing. Wish me luck?"
Instead, a bit predictably, he said, "May the Force be with you, Merit Solo." She smiled and mentally shrugged. She wasn't surprised, not really … and then, Obi-Wan reminded her that he was a newly-minted knight with a mischievous streak, adding, "Then again, from what I've seen, it usually is. I'll see you in our quarters for the midday meal." As he finished speaking, the Council door swung open, with Mace Windu standing there. She took a deep breath once more and strode into the Council Chambers. In spite of her desire to do so, she didn't look back. This was for her to do. Merit just prayed that the Council would listen to what she had to say.
SWSWSWSWSW
"You want us to do what?"
The surprise wasn't the words … the surprise is that it had taken this long for the words to be said. And Mace really wasn't sure who said them. Nor was he sure that it mattered. Knight Merit Solo repeated slowly, "The Code needs revision … or clarification. More to the point, what 'attachment' is needs clarification. I was attached to my brother, which was all right … our father was attached to our half-sister, and that led to the Second Jedi Purge. You need to clarify which attachments are bad. Attachment is what allows a person to defend their home world and their family. That's good. It's when a person develops the attitude that they would let the world burn for one person that things go badly."
"Has a point, Knight Solo does. Attachment to each other, she and her brother have had. Protected them, it did," Master Yaddle pointed out. Merit inclined her head, maintaining her neutral face, though his growing friendship with her and with her late brother allowed Mace to sense the turmoil she felt. The small Master went on, "Still … worried about this, I am. Have good ideas about protecting the younglings, you do. Have good ideas about the Initiates not taken as Padawans, you do. But the Code … served it well, it has."
"I don't doubt you, Master Yaddle," was Merit's earnest reply, "but there's something you need to understand. The Sith haven't been seen in a thousand years. That doesn't mean they died out, it means that they went into hiding. It also means that during those thousand years, they've changed and evolved, with one desire and one desire alone … to destroy the Jedi Order and assert their dominance over the galaxy. In order to defeat them, and in order to protect the Republic, the Jedi must evolve as well. I don't know how to deal with the Code. But if the Jedi Order is to survive the coming storm, changes must be made."
Because it had to be said, because his fellow Councilors needed to have the future brought home to them again (and because the Force was being annoyingly quiet about this), Mace said quietly, "The Code has helped to define the Jedi Order for centuries. The other changes you suggested are easily instituted. And I particularly appreciate that you didn't suggest calling back to the Temple all of the former initiates who were sent to the various Corps … that instead, all initiates who aren't chosen by Masters from this point forward remain as a home guard. But changing the Code … Knight Solo, the Code is there for a reason."
"And that is something I appreciate, which is why my thought was to amend or clarify or revise the Code. That's not something I can do. I'm a Knight, not a Master and I have no understanding of the legal intricacies of the Order. But. The Jedi Order is rapidly diminishing. Every year, there are fewer Masters, but the number of initiates either stays the same or rises. Something must be done, Masters … or the Jedi face extinction. Make no mistake … just as the Sith evolved, so must the Jedi. Because if the Jedi do not change, do not evolve, they will perish. And with them will perish the Republic. I will not stand by and watch that happen. Not again. Never again," Merit Solo answered quietly. She never raised her voice once, but everyone in the room could feel her determination. What was previously merely a mandate from the Force was now a sacred mission for the young Knight, in light of her brother's death.
Mace was ready to show his final card, but Depa beat him to it. She said softly, "The Order already allows members who belong to a species with few members to marry and have children, in order to keep their species alive. Why then, not apply that same standard to the Order itself? Masters, we know that the Order is on the edge of extinction itself. We know that Jedi Purges are coming. We are not a species, but we are a culture. Should we order our masters and knights to marry? Of course not. But Knight Solo is right. We, as an Order, are dying. Had the Force not spoken to us directly … had Knight Solo not granted us access to her memories, we would not know that we are dying. We have been given a chance by the Force to save ourselves. We must take it. We must."
With those words, silence fell in the Council Chambers. The members looked at each other uneasily, and Merit stood silently in the center of the room. Once more, Mace opened his mouth to break the silence and take that first terrifying step forward into uncharted territory … once more, someone got there before he did. Kit Fisto rose from his seat and stepped forward, saying quietly, "I vote to accept all of Knight Solo's recommendations … the protection of the younglings and crechelings, the creation of the home guard, and studying the code to revise it." He turned toward the young Knight and bowed to her. Obviously taken off guard by the gesture, Merit responded in kind.
As ever, once one domino fell, it set off a chain reaction. Naturally, despite the words of Merit Solo, Depa, and Kit, the Council was divided (and they might well lose people with the revision of the Code) … until Yoda voted. With eight words, Yoda changed the direction of the Jedi Order, saying simply, "Accept all of Knight Solo's recommendations, I do." Merit exhaled and sank to her knees, trembling, as if realizing what she just did. Master Yaddle left her chair and waddled down to the shaking Knight, stroking her claw over the long dark hair.
A new day had begun for the Jedi. May the Force help them all.
TBC
Additional Author's Notes: And that's the Council decided. I hope it was realistic … even with the Force speaking through Merit and everything they knew, I thought it highly unlikely that everyone would accept the changes in the Order/recommendations put forth by Merit. As to the future, there will be one or two more chapters dealing with the fallout from this decision, and then book two begins. Still not sure if that will be a separate story, or part of this one. If you have thoughts/preferences, by all means, weigh in with your review.