To Catface: awww, I always look forward to your reviews :D please make an account, I need to talk to you about something to do with the story and the characters :) I'm away this weekend so if you do write I'll reply on Monday evening at the earliest xo

Here's Chapter 12!

The sound of people surrounded me as I stared at my plate full of food which was placed on the table in the cafeteria. I sat with the group but didn't get involved with any of their conversations. My thoughts were still distracted by Will's appearance a couple days ago.

After my date with Nick I stayed inside not bothering with any school work or anything else of even slight importance. My parents came back in the late evening on Sunday however I stayed in my bed the whole day and when they arrived I was already asleep.

Unfortunately for me Monday droned on slowly as I sat unresponsive in my lessons, oblivious to what any of my teachers were talking about.

I began to question whether I really did see Will in the corridor that day. Whether maybe I just imagined it. In all honestly, I missed him. I missed him a lot. When he first broke up with me I got really messed up. At first I didn't really eat which worried my parents and friends since after the attack I needed to eat more to get myself back on track.

I also got rid of all the things which reminded me of him. This included the large teddy bear he once won for me at a fun fair which held a heart with 'I LOVE YOU' written on it. That was after about a year since we started dating and it was also how he told me he loves me. Will was a big romantic even though I was probably the only one who saw that side of him instead of his tough character.

Of course I never blamed Will for what happened. It's not like he could've prevented it from happening or do anything in the situation without getting hurt himself even if he was there.

"Jo!"

Patrick's voice tore through my little bubble of thoughts and I turned to face him.

"Sorry, what?" I asked not sure about what the conversation, I clearly should have listened to, was about.

"Sam wants to know if you're up for going out to the diner next weekend." Bob said with his mouth full… as always.

"I just wanted all of us to get together before Christmas comes since Patrick and I are going away." Sam filled me in.

"Umm, yeah sure, that would be fun." I replied shooting her a quick smile obviously showing how much attention I had been paying recently.

Everyone smiled at me and returned to their chatter. Everyone but Patrick.

"Jo, are you alright? You've been kind of distant lately. Is there something wrong?" He enquired. I couldn't lie to Patrick. However I didn't really feel like telling him, as well as everyone else , about Will.

"Just some stuff going on, don't worry about it." I said smiling at him.

"Come on." He said taking my hand in his and pulling me up and out of my seat.

"Where are we going?" I asked nearly tripping over my chair.

"We are leaving. Grab your stuff, let's go." Patrick said shuffling me in a friendly manner.

"Guys, if anyone asks, she was feeling sick so I took her home okay?" Patrick asked all the people who still sat at the table.

A group response of 'sure', 'yeah' and 'see ya' could be heard just as we turned from the table and started to walk out of the cafeteria, my hand still in Patrick's.

"Patrick, where are we going?" I asked again this time slightly louder so that he could hear me.

"Ditching. There's something going on with you and it's bothering you and you're telling me because I am your friend." He said smiling at me with that usual big grin of his.

"We can't just leave school because you wanna talk." I said as we reached his car in the car park and he opened the door of the passenger's seat for me. I got in as I didn't see the point of returning to school where I didn't want to be at the moment.

Patrick got into his seat, switched on the engine and began to drive out of his parking space and away from the school. I watched as the building became smaller and smaller the further we got and turned to smile at Patrick.

"Being bad feels pretty good, huh?" He said.

"Hey, don't quote The Breakfast Club to justify skipping school." I laughed.

"But you're obviously feeling slightly better already."

"Yeah, I am." I said.

We drove in a comfortable silence for some time before we reached a deserted road out of town where Patrick stopped the car.

"Are you going to kill me because if you are then this is a really uncreative way of killing? Just putting that out there."

"Sorry my master mind of homicide isn't advanced enough for you." He replied sarcastically but still laughing at my joke.

"Come on, Jo. Don't avoid the subject. What's go-?" His expression turned into one of worry and concern but I managed to cut him off in the middle of his sentence.

"So what's this thing that Sam is planning for next weekend?" I asked looking at him.

"Jo…" His voice slightly edgy as if convincing me to start talking.

"I saw him."

"Saw who?"

"Will."

"Who's Will?" he said still confused about the limited amount of information I've given him.

"Will is my ex-boyfriend."

"Oh. Wait, saw him where? Isn't he back in Cali?"

"Apparently not. Remember last week when you had detention and I waited for you? The notes I got which I thought were from Bob?"

"Wait. Notes? You only told me about one. That was from him?"

"Yeah. There were two others, the second one said 'I'm sorry' and the third 'I missed you' which I found in my locker. And then I heard a noise and he was there."

"What happened between you guys? Did he do anything to you?"

"No, no of course not this is Will you're talking about. He wouldn't hurt me, ever."

"Okay…" He said still not sounding very sure.

"So what happened when you saw him?" He asked keeping a constant gaze on me as if I were to disappear any second.

"He said he missed me…" A small tear left my eye but I didn't care. Patrick had already seen me at my worst when I first told him about my attack. It was weird how much I confined in him even though I've only known him for about four or five months.

"We kind of argued…Well, I did. I slapped him when he said he missed me and then we…" I broke off. Did I want to tell Patrick that Will and I kissed? Even though I kind of liked Patrick, I was putting my feelings aside since I knew what happened with him and Brad. I didn't think he'd like me, a girl, showing him affection after he's been through so much.

"And then we…?" He started my sentence where I finished off.

"I kissed him. Purely out of anger." I laughed lightly. "It's funny really because that's usually how our arguments finish. He was always the softie in the relationship. Every time we argued I'd kiss him or he'd kiss me and it would all end, you know. Old habits die hard, I guess." I finished, letting a few more tears through a little laughter.

"Jo…" Patrick's voice full of sorry for me.

"Do you still miss him? Will, I mean." He asked.

"Do you still miss Brad?"

Patrick's eyes turned to the ground and I felt a small twinge of guilt pass through me. I didn't mean to remind him of that.

"I'd be a liar if I say I didn't. It's not like I can erase him out of my memory. I haven't told anyone this but I really wish things were different." He said.

"How do you mean?" I asked, confused at his statement.

"I wish his dad wasn't a homophobic twat. I wish everyone could be able to show that they love someone no matter what their gender, race, colour… All those things."

"I wish people weren't so hateful towards things they didn't understand." I said sighing quietly. I didn't realise Patrick felt this way. Surely he had some kind of resentful feelings towards Brad's father but I didn't know he held those feelings for others as well.

I wish could somehow take away all the pain from the world, all the hurt caused by people to each other and bury it deep inside me so that I could make sure that it never comes out.

"I guess it's stupid really, but they say that sometimes people need closure. I guess we just hadn't gotten ours yet."

"One day all of us will get the closure that we need. Some just need to wait longer than others." He said looking out the window.

"I know. I just didn't think he would ever do that to me." I sighed slumping into the chair crying a little bit more.

Patrick leaned forward and wrapped his arms around me pulling me into his lap. I rested my head against his chest, similarly to like I had done some time ago, and closed my eyes.

"Shh…It'll be okay, Jo." He whispered softly. I looked up at him, looking into his eyes.

"How do you know? How could anyone possibly know if anything is ever going to be okay?"

I only then realised how close my lips were to his. How I could feel his breath on me and how he could feel my breath on him. The intimacy of the situation didn't scare me. I didn't mind it.

"We can't ever be sure. But I know that as long as we have each other, we'll get through this and any other obstacles that come our way." He said.

Slowly, he used his hands to wipe my wet cheeks so that all the tears were gone. I smiled at him, an appreciative smile.

The next thing I felt were Patrick's lips on mine. The familiar Patrick smell wrapped around me. One of his hands was on my waist and the other on my back. My hands were in his hair as I kissed him back just like I had wanted to so many times. I could tell this could be the beginning of something unexpected.

Unfortunately, before the moment could really start, it was over. Patrick pulled away from me and looked at me with a confused expression.

"I can't do this, Jo. I'm sorry. I…I'm supposed to be gay. I don't understand. I just need you to give me some time to understand what's going on with me. " He continued and I slid off his lap and back into the passenger's seat.

"I know, Patrick. I'm sorry. I'll give you all the time you need."