Hello peoples. I'm on Christmas break, so I'm gonna try to advance this story line a little bit. I realize I don't update that often and I apologize to those who actually like this (for some strange reason…not trying to insult you or anything).

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, DMC, or anything else I make a reference to that's already owned by someone else.

Chapter Nine: Meeting the team...freakin' woooooonderful…

The next day, Naruto showed up at the academy, proudly showing off his shiny new Konoha headband. Today was the day he would put on his ninja clothes and then finally show people that being a ninja wasn't all about being an Uchiha, as everybody seemed to think. Naruto wore a simple black shirt, with some long, dark green, cargo pants to hold some ninja necessities. He also wore a dark green jacket. On his back were his Rebellion and his twin handguns, but he hadn't brought Agni and Rudra with him today. Instead, he brought his surrogate brother's purple electric guitar. Except for the purple guitar, Naruto had the look of a seasoned ninja, if that ninja was a midget. Knowing this, Naruto proudly walked into the classroom, earning many questioning looks as well as some angry ones.

"What the hell, Naruto!? Didn't you not pass the test?!" shrieked one of Sasuke's many fangirls.

"I took a super, ultra secret exam for only elite ninjas! I passed it and Iruka gave me a headband!" Naruto replied, glaring at the fangirl who questioned his amazing skill. He took his normal seat near Shikamaru, who looked shockingly determined, and Choji, who was munching away on his seventh bag of chips.

"Yo, Naruto, what's up with the guitar?" asked the lazy ninja.

"It's actually Dante's, but he lets me borrow it every once in awhile. It's really cool, too! It shoots electric bats and stuff! I would totally show you, but it would probably destroy the entire school or something." responded the blonde. Shikamaru gave him a skeptical look, but shrugged. Shikamaru had taken to wearing a long sleeved dark green shirt with dark brown pants. Spiral was sitting on the desk in front of him. Choji was wearing a large blue jacket with his clan symbol on the back, along with brown pants. Choji had somehow gained the miraculous ability of holding on to his grenade launcher, which had become somewhat of a security blanket for Choji, while still eating massive amounts of chips.

"So are you two enjoying your new toys?"

"Yeah, but my mom went crazy when she saw me walk in with the huge thing. I had to sleep on the roof just to drown out her screaming." Shikamaru said, laying his head on the desk to try and get some sleep.

"Mmmph, mph mmummple mmph!" Naruto looked towards his larger friend.

"You might want to swallow first, Choji." When Choji finally looked ready to answer, Iruka busted in.

"EVERYBODY SIT DOWN AND SHUT THE HELL UP!!!" The shocked students looked at their heavily bandaged teacher as he stormed into the classroom.

"Sensei! What happened to you?!" screeched Sakura.

"I'd rather not talk about it…" he said, casting a quick glance toward Naruto. "Anyway, today I'm going to announce the team line ups! Everybody listen up…" Iruka proceeded to announce the nameless teams nobody cares about. "Alright! Team 7 will consist of…Haruno Sakura…Uchiha Sasuke…"

"YES!!! IN YOUR FACE INO!!! LOVE CONQUERS…"

"SAKURA, SHUT UP!!!" yelled Iruka, effectively stopping the pink haired howler monkey's love rant. "The third member of team 7 is Uzumaki Naruto." Very pissed off, Sasuke and Sakura turn to glare at an extremely shocked Naruto.

"Bu…bu…but Teach! You can't put me on a team with Useless and Emo Duck!" Naruto protested.

"I'm sorry Naruto, but it wasn't up to me. Just deal with it. The same for you, Sasuke, Sakura. Understand?"

"Hn."

"HMPH!"

"I'll try Teach. Shouldn't yell like that. My bad."

"Thank you Naruto. Anyway your jonin leader will be Hatake Kakashi. Moving on, team 8 will consist of Hyuuga Hinata, Inuzuka Kiba, and Aburame Shino. Your jonin leader will be Yuhi Kurenai. Team 9 is still in circulation. Team 10 will consist of Nara Shikamaru, Akimichi Choji and Yamanaka Ino. Your jonin leader will be Sarutobi Asuma…" As Iruka trailed on and our favorite ninja's in training were left to either grumble about or enjoy their new teammates, Naruto began to think about his future as a ninja.

'I sure hope this is going to be worth it. If I have to listen to Useless talk about how great Emo Duck is all the time, I swear I'm going to kill myself!'

"And those are all of the team line ups. Just relax in here and your team leaders will come to pick you up in a few minutes. Good luck to you all!" Iruka said, promptly leaving afterwards. Random jonin came and picked up their random genin teams. Eventually, though, Asuma came to pick up his new team.

"Holy crap, Shikamaru! Your leader guy's huge!" Naruto yelled, pointing at the bear of a man that just walked in.

"Yeah, thanks for blowing out my eardrums. Come on Choji, let's go. Good luck, Naruto."

"See ya later, Naruto." And with that, Naruto was left alone with his teammates. After a long awkward silence, Naruto tried to break the ice.

"So, do you think our leader guy's going to be cool, or what?" The only response Naruto got was two icy glares.

"Aw, don't worry about them, cutie." A strange new voice said. "I'm sure even if you don't have good teammates or a good teacher, you'll still be very powerful." The guitar that Naruto had laid on the desk in front of him began to pulsate with energy, before a bright purple light came off of it. When the three ninjas in training could see again, they were treated to the sight of a half naked woman with hair covering her, uh…ta-tas. Her bottom half was covered by a strange black mass.

"N-n-n-n…NEVAN!?! I thought Dante sealed you after the last…uh…"

"Oh, you mean with the whipped cream? Oh, that was fun!" the woman, now known as Nevan squealed. "Anyway, I figured out a way to break out of the seal. Now I can spend all the time with you that I want…" she said, strutting over to Naruto.

"Uhhhh…SASUKE!!! SAKURA!!! HELP!!!" the poor blonde screamed. Unfortunately for him, Sasuke was on the ground with a nose bleed and Sakura was too busy trying to help the innocent emo. Fortunately, this is exactly when Kakashi finally got his lazy ass to the academy to meet his new 'team'. As he entered, his visible eye widened, a look of utter surprise assumed to be on his face.

'Bloody avengers, screeching fangirls and this strange kid who's…WHOA…man, at least I'll be entertained before I fail them.' The cyclops thought to himself.

"Oh, hey new Teach! Wow, you are pretty cool lookin'!" said the blonde haired demon slayer, somehow completely forgetting the ravenous succubus behind him. Nevan quickly tackled him to the ground.

"Uhhh…right…meet me on the roof in five minutes." Kakashi poofed to the roof leaving his new students to deal with their own problems. Naruto managed to push Nevan off of him and raced out the door to the roof, with the sultry succubus running after him. Sasuke had managed to finally wake up and after a short briefing from Sakura, ran to the roof with Sakura closely following the emo duck.

Meanwhile, with Dante…

"Man, I feel like rockin' out!" the white haired demon slayer said to nobody, going through his pile of stuff to find his purple electric guitar. Eventually, he found a note from his surrogate little brother.

'Yo, Dante! I felt like takin' Nevan today, so I did! Don't worry, I won't hurt it or nothin', I just feel like showin' off a little. Thanks!'

"Aw, man…Oh well. Maybe I'll look for that crazy snake chick. She was a riot!"

Whew! Man I'm lazy! Took me a month to finish this, working on it on and off. Pretty pathetic for a month, am I right? Oh well. Back to school, less updates abound, and it's not like I'm good at this anyway.

By the way, Nevan is an actual weapon from Devil May Cry 3. And Devil May Cry 4 is coming out soon! Woo! It's going to be awesome! Again, sorry about the slow updates, for those of you who care. Peace, I'm out like the gout!