By the time I arrived back at the office, the phone company jus installed my brand new rotary telephone. Kitty was in the other room.

"No calls yet, Sam" said Kitty "How's about a cup of coffee?"

"You know it, babe" said Sam "Hey Kitty! Do we have Tanya's phone number?"

"Klondike 51234, Sam" Kitty replied.

"Thanks" Sam said as he started to dial the number.

The girl may not be the best office cleaner, but she's got an awesome memory. Wasting no time, I dialed Tanya's phone number. It's so easy to remember, sure wish I could've remembered it.

"Hello Tanya? Sam Spayed here" Sam spoke into the phone.

"Oh hello, Mr. Spayed" said Tanya "What did you find out about the murder?"

"I stopped by your husband's office and found out some information on him" said Sam.

"Who did you talk to?" asked Tanya, over the phone.

"A guys named Professor Felix" said Sam "He said he was O'Tabby's assistant"

"We never really thought of him as an assistant, Sam" said Tanya "He worked as hard as my husband and with the students. He's been with the university for decades. In fact, he was my husband's mentor"

At that same time, Kitty arrived carrying a tray of coffee with her as me and Tanya were conversing on the phone.

"Anyways, the professor said that your husband might've been involved with another woman" said Sam.

Kitty then gasped and dropped the tray of coffee, which landed right on my chest and boy was it burning hot.

"Sam" she gasped "I'm so sorry"

Just then, I heard Tanya on the phone asking if I was okay, so I picked up the phone and answered it.

"Listen Tanya, I'm going to have to call you back" said Sam "I have some pressing business to attend to"

"Sam, I am so sorry" said Tanya "I didn't know what was going through my mind"

"That's okay Kitty, we'll have maintenance clean this place up" said Sam "Tell them we need a mop and bucket, I'll pick up the pieces of the mug"

Man, that coffee was hot enough to make my surname more aptly. I walked into the bathroom to clean up and noticed a huge coffee stain covering up my shirt. Wait a minute, that's it! O'Tabby had coffee stains on his shirt, but why? Where did the coffee come from?

I searched my jacket pocket for the colorful stone I found earlier and examined it carefully; it was painted alright. That's because it was no stone, it was a piece of ceramic, which is what coffee mugs are made from. So O'Tabby must've been drinking coffee during the time of the accident. That wasn't enough information though, I needed more clues besides a cup of Joe.

Why would a man be drinking coffee while he was driving? And how would coffee be connected to a murder? And what was keeping Kitty from coming back?

I searched for Tanya's phone number to apologize for the interruption, but I couldn't find it at all. Wait a minute, Tanya never gave me a phone number. But somehow, Kitty knew the number. Kitty would know the number if Tanya's husband gave it to her. Could she have been sweet on the professor? Of course! She spilled the coffee when I mentioned Professor O'Tabby's women issues and she makes a mean cup of coffee. Which is the description for the same girl that recently left from the university, which was the same day I hired Kitty. A girl that was infatuated with a man she could never have. So what does she do? Of course! She deliberately spills coffee on his lap, ties him into his car and does away with him the first chance she gets. Wait a minute...

"Maintenance is here, Sam" said Kitty.

While the janitor arrived inside the office, I went to confront Kitty about her little problem.

"I know you murdered Professor O'Tabby, Kitty" said Sam.

"Sam, what are you talking about?" asked Kitty.

"Don't play coy with me, missy" said Sam "You loved the professor and when you couldn't have him, no one could!"

"Yes" Kitty bursted into tears "I loved him so much, but he never loved me. I couldn't have him, so I...I...I left!"

"You left?" asked Sam.

"The thought of being at the university reminded me too much of my broken heart, so I quit" Kitty said through her tears "But I didn't murder him"

The tears were streaming down her face like rain on a pine tree.

"But, what about the coffee stains and the ceramic cup?" Sam asked as he handed Kitty the mug piece.

Kitty examined it "He always drank from his favorite mug, Sam. I don't know how it could've gotten smashed to pieces"

I had just ran out of suspects.

"Kitty, did you have any duties besides being the office's coffee girl?" asked Sam.

"I was Professor O'Tabby's girl Friday" said Kitty "I sorted his mail, kept his appointment calendar sorted, filled out his prescriptions, sharpened his pencils..."

"Wait a minute" Sam interrupted "What was that about filling out his prescriptions?"

"Professor O'Tabby was an insomniac" said Kitty "He needed very potent sleeping pills to help him doze off at night. I remember him bragging about those pills. He took two of them to put him to sleep and that took an hour. But they could knock out a bull elephant"

"Kitty, help maintenance pick up the office" said Sam "I've gotta go catch a murderer. I now know whodunit"

I found Professor O'Felix in the university chapel, praying to God beside the stain glass.

"Asking for forgiveness, professor?" asked Sam.

"For what it's worth, Mr. Spayed, I had nothing to lose" O'Felix sniffled.

"Let's go" Sam said bluntly.

By the time the paperwork had been done it was 8 pm. Lt. Washington was his usual self as Professor O'Felix was being booked. It had been a long day and I figured I'd better head back to Kitty. She was pretty shaken up by the time I left the building. When I got back to the office I saw Tanya O'Tabby sobbing like a baby. I walked up to her and put her in my arms. She didn't say anything, I already knew what she was thinking.

"One thing I still don't get; why were you following me?" asked Sam.

"I wanted to make sure you were on the right track, Sam" said Tanya "I knew a sharp guy like you could only solve this mystery. Why don't you cut the tough guy act and give me a smile for once?"

"How's this?" Sam asked as he made a deadpan look.

"That's more like it" said Tanya.

"Now let's talk about you and me, baby" Sam deadpanned.

"It wouldn't work out, Sam" said Tanya "We're different"

"I know" Sam smirked.

"Let's just face it Sam, maybe an alternate universe we would've had something, you and I" said Tanya "But let's face it, we're just too different"

"I suppose you're right, Tanya" said Sam "You're a sophisticated lady and I'm a working stiff"

"I like caviar and you like hot dogs" Tanya added.

"Yeah" Sam nodded.

"I'm refined and you're a slob" Tanya continued.

"Okay" Sam said, getting annoyed.

"I fly first class and you're coach" Tanya continued.

"I get it, Tanya" said Sam.

"But you're still all man, Sam" Tanya said as she picked Sam up "I wish it could've worked out between us"

"I'll never forget you Tanya" Sam said as he hugged Tanya.

"Goodbye Sam" Tanya said as she slipped a piece of paper into his jacket and left.

I watched that beautiful woman take her leave into the night, possibly never to see her again.

"She called after you left, I told her you were going to nab the murderer" said Kitty "She came right away"

I didn't answer. My mind was still in the arms of a classy babe. All I know is that there had better be a check in that envelope.

"Sam, how did you Felix was the killer?" asked Kitty.

"It's quite simple" Sam began to explain "O'Tabby had to have left directly from the campus to call on Maudy O'Purr that night because he was drinking out of his favorite mug when the crash occurred. Professor O'Felix the substitute girl Friday, fixed that cup of coffee. Felix filled out Tabby's prescription for sleeping pills and popped a couple into his coffee, knowing how long it would tale to get to Old Mountain Road forty miles away and one hour. Like clockwork, the pills took effect and O'Tabby drove off the cliff, leading to his demise. The police were right; he did fall asleep at the wheel"

"Wow" said Kitty "That's scary, yet very complex"

"The motive is obvious, Kitty" said Sam "The old power struggle in the life of careers. Old man gets succeeded by younger man. Young man gets power, respect, glory and the old man gets older, envious and bitter. Finally, the old man plots to do away with the young man, out of desperation. With O'Tabby gone, O'Felix could retain his career"

"Sam, you're just too much" Kitty said as she poured a bottle of milk and let her hair down.

"What's the milk for Kitty?" Sam asked as he joined Kitty on the couch, who crossed her legs.

"You ask too many questions, Sam" Kitty said flirtatiously.

Kitty had picked me up, took off my hat and well, the rest as they sat is history.

THE END

Author's Note:

It looks like the mystery has been solved at last folks. Now that we've helped Sam Spayed solve the mystery of O'Tabby, let's get back to the real world and see what Garfield is up to!

Stay tuned for our next story, coming real soon.