Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds.
"Families are about love overcoming emotional torture." – Matt Groening
o o o o
Dr. Benjamin Sellers
and
Ms. Brenda Sellers
Request the pleasure of your company at a cocktail party
celebrating the engagement of their granddaughter
Calliope Kirsten
to
Doctor Spencer William Reid
on Saturday the twenty-sixth of February
at five o'clock in the afternoon
Dahlia Plantation
Williamsburg
o o o o
23 January, 2011
"Hey!" Calliope plopped down in the fourth seat at the table, dropping her purse to the floor, shrugging out of her heavy coat and folding up her umbrella. "I'm sorry I'm late. We had a crisis at home. Minnie was kidnapped."
"Well, I hope she was rescued," J.J. laughed.
"Yes. We found her in the evil clutches of the monster under the bed."
"Shouldn't that have been the first place you looked?" Emily picked up her coffee with a tired smile on her face. Emily was always tired lately.
"It was. This monster lived in Jack's bedroom," Calliope rolled her eyes and Penelope started laughing as the waiter came up. "Hi, ohhh, you have the coffee. You're the most beautiful man I've ever seen. Can I have the biggest coffee trough you can possibly find and four espresso shots, because that teeny, tiny Queen Mum teacup you have there is just way too small."
"But… this is the biggest cup we have."
"Oh. Well, can I have the four shots and you just leave the pot here? I'll take good care of it, I promise."
"Uh…"
"Really good care of it. It won't want for anything." The teenager still looked unsure, so Calliope just kept rambling. "Prep school. Ivy League. It'll go to Princeton. Yale law school. It'll become Dr. Coffee, PhD. All other coffees will aspire to be just like him. Please, let me have the pot."
"Way to scar that kid for life, Mrs. Folgers," J.J. laughed, shaking her head as Calliope stared at the tiny cup and tried to figure out the proper sugar-to-coffee ratio with the pot sitting in front of her.
"How is this supposed to be enough coffee?" Calliope asked, spooning sugar into her cup. "Who is this supposed to be enough coffee for? The old lady who lived in a shoe? Sneezy? This is a doll-sized cup. Emeline could drink this amount of coffee and nothing would happen. You couldn't drown a fly in this cup. No self-respecting person could possibly think this is enough coffee."
"Can we stop talking about coffee for a minute? We have something important to talk about," Penelope started digging into her purse, hunting around for something.
"Coffee's not important? Don't blaspheme, Ethel, it's a sin."
"I'm sorry, I'm pretty sure your engagement party invitation is more important than coffee!" Penelope produced the card from her purse and Calliope nearly spit her coffee across the table to Emily.
"What is that?" she gasped.
"Well, it's an invitation –"
"That's not my invitation!" Calliope grabbed the pink envelope from Penelope's hand.
"Are you sure?" Emily asked. "It looks like you."
"Well, yeah," Calliope said, dragging the invitation from the envelope and stared at the pink and orange cardstock. The purple and white dahlia and its petals smiled at her from their corners. "I hope so. I designed it. But this isn't what was supposed to be sent out."
"It's the same one I got," J.J. offered and Emily nodded.
"I have a pink envelope just like that. It was in my mailbox this morning."
"This is the one I wanted, but we picked a different one. It's supposed to be white with black emboss and some lace and I think it had a pearl. How did this happen? Oh my God, Mammy is going to kill me. How did this happen?"
"Okay, that wasn't quite the reaction I was expecting when I brought this up," Penelope frowned.
"I need more coffee."
"You haven't even finished this cup," J.J. pointed out.
"I need a bucket of coffee big enough to dunk my head into, a coffee bong, something," Calliope started putting the envelope in her purse but Penelope snatched it out of her hand.
"Um, excuse me, that belongs to me!" Penelope held the envelope to her chest protectively. "I don't know about you, but I'm making a scrapbook of this wedding and I need this invitation!"
"Your scrapbook will be lacking a wedding picture. Hopefully, the news article announcing my suspicious death will suffice."
"Stop being so dramatic," Emily rolled her eyes. "It can't be that bad. It's just an invitation."
"To you, it's just an invitation. To Mammy, it's a Fort Sumter."
ooo ooo ooo ooo
Spencer sat in the dark movie theater watching a special, one-day-only showing of Lady and the Tramp with Emeline curled up in his lap. The movie was almost over; Emeline had made it up until the rat was found behind the curtain, but now she was snuggled against him with her thumb in her mouth and her eyes drooped half-closed. The mostly empty bucket of popcorn was propped up in the chair Emeline had occupied.
Calliope was out having lunch with Penelope, J.J. and Emily, so the movie seemed like a good father-daughter event for a rainy day. He had been planning on taking her to the park, but the unexpected thunderstorm washed out that idea. The team had been away a lot this month and Spencer was grateful to have some time with Emeline.
They stayed until the credits were over and the theater emptied out. Spencer stood, carefully cradling Emeline in one arm as he stuck the empty cup into the popcorn bucket and picked both up to carry to the trashcan. Emeline wrapped her arms around his neck and held on tight.
Spencer was soaked clear through by the time Emeline was strapped into her car seat. He got into the drivers seat, turned the volume down on Dora the Explorer Dance Fiesta!, and turned the heat up to warm the car. They were a few blocks away when Emeline let out a shriek that made Spencer slam on the breaks.
"MINNIE! I LEFT MINNIE!" Emeline wailed and Spencer turned the car around immediately. Telling her they were going back for the stuffed doll and trying to calm her down, Spencer fought to find a parking space again and finally found one towards the back of the lot.
"I'll be right back," he said before getting out and locking the doors. He ran through the rain, splashing up puddles as he went. Sopping everywhere, Spencer plodded up to the ticket desk, gasping. "Hi, my daughter and I were just in Lady and the Tramp and she left a Minnie Mouse doll."
"You can go on back," the girl shrugged. "They're probably still cleaning that theater."
"Thanks," Spencer nodded, squelching his way through the lobby. He repeated his story to the boys collecting trash from the floor and they produced the doll.
"Yeah, we were gonna take it to the lost and found when we were done."
Spencer tucked Minnie into his jacket and ran back through the rain, hunching his shoulders to keep the doll as dry as possible. These shoes, on the other hand, were never going to dry. He threw himself into the car and handed the mostly-dry Minnie Mouse back to Emeline, who grabbed it from his hands and buried her tear-stained face in the tatty fabric.
"Are you hungry, Eme?"
"Can we go to Chuck-E-Cheese, Poppy?"
"Not today, Princess. Let's go to Sammy T's. You can get grilled cheese."
"I don't want grilled cheese," Emeline shook her head. "Can I have casameas?"
"Quesadillas are okay."
When Spencer and Emeline finally pulled into the garage an hour and a half later, Emeline desperately needed a nap and Spencer just wanted a hot shower. Perses followed at his heel while Spencer put Emeline into her Buzz pajamas and tucked her into bed. He followed Spencer out of the bedroom and down the hall to the studio in the back of the house.
He pushed the door open and saw Calliope sitting on her stool working on a painting of the ocean. Dozens of wedding dress sketches were pinned up on the wall, a few with x's in the corner. He stood there watching her until she spoke.
"Close the door."
"Painting looks beautiful, Sweetheart. You drew seventy-six dresses, you should branch into fashion."
"Shut up."
"Excuse me?" Spencer raised his eyebrows and Calliope twirled around on her stool, her expression furious.
"How could you? What the hell were you thinking?" Calliope hissed at him, throwing her paintbrush onto the paint splattered floor.
"I was thinking I was coming into–"
"Ethel brought her engagement party invitation to brunch today. It was the funniest thing, really, because our invitation wasn't our invitation. It was pink and orange with a purple and white dahlia. It looked remarkably like the one I painted. But, thing is, last time I checked, we'd picked out a different invitation. Ya know, black, white, lacy. Remember?
"Anyways, I spent an hour and a half on the phone with the printers trying to figure out how our invitations got screwed up and they said that you came in the next day and told them we changed our mind," Calliope's voice was getting louder and the pitch was rising. "That we wanted a different invitation and a different announcement. They said, you brought in an example and that you waited while they made up a proof of both and that you approved them and wanted them sent out immediately. HOW COULD YOU DO THAT, SPENCER?"
"I got you the invitations you wanted!" Spencer protested. "Those were the ones you wanted! You hated the other invitations, you only agreed because Brenda wanted those."
"Family's about compromise!" Calliope shouted at him.
"Well, you're the only one I ever see compromising!" Spencer shouted back and Calliope threw a tube of paint at him. "This is our wedding – your wedding! It should be the way you want it! It's not her wedding!"
"She's my mother! It is her wedding!"
"My mistake, I thought I proposed to you!"
Calliope threw the can of paintbrushes at him and Spencer ducked in time for the entire thing to clatter to the floor behind him.
"I thought it was what you'd want! I thought you'd be happy!"
"Mammy's called seven times!"
"Have you picked up?"
"No!"
"We'll go back to the regular invitations next time. Brenda can pick out the whole thing, okay? I'm sorry."
"There is no going back, Spencer, don't you understand that? There is no 'undo' button on this this! There's only 'forge ahead!'"
"It's only the engagement announcements and the party invitations."
"'Only,'" Calliope laughed. "Yes, 'only,' it's 'only' the first invitation. You can't go back after the first invitation, Spencer. The first invitation is the style for the rest of the wedding."
"It's the style you want, so what's the problem? Maybe it wasn't the most ideal way to get it, but you get the wedding you want! You win!"
"I win? I win! Yes, I get the wedding I'd love to have, so I must have won. I win my wedding, but I lose my mother!"
"So, what? You'd rather just fight with her over everything and then give in and let her have her way the entire wedding? You'll fight over every colour and dress and everything else that goes into a wedding, but you'll give up each time to let her win. This is your wedding, Calliope. I want you to be able to look at the pictures in fifty years and be able to say it was the wedding you always wanted. I don't want you to be at the reception next to me looking at pastels and flowers you hate, eating a cake you don't like in a dress that makes you want to cry.
"Brenda will get over it. She'll be mad, I knew she would be, but she'll get over it. She loves you and she wants to be in your life and in your wedding. You'll make up over this. But if you give in to everything she wants, you're going to have a Scarlett and Rhett wedding you hate. I put up with a lot of shit because of your family, but I will not stand there and watch you be miserable on what's supposed to be the happiest day of your life. I won't do that. I'll do a lot of things for your family, but I will not do that."
"I appreciate that you want me to be happy, but –"
"I don't want you to just be happy, Sweetheart," Spencer took a step forward, but stopped when Calliope narrowed her eyes at him. "I want this to be the most perfect day of your life. I don't want it to be so full of compromises that you hate it just so it fits Brenda's expectations.
"Oh look," Calliope held out the ringing phone, "it's for you."
ooo ooo ooo ooo
BUCKING TRADITION
If there was any thought that Calliope Sellers would be having a traditional, aristocratic wedding to rival Will and Kate's, it's been officially forgotten. The personal engagement announcements (picture inset) went out this weekend and it's a bright and modern. Most people thought the wedding would be a traditional Southern wedding, but we'll see what the couple chooses next!
A/N:
It's pouring outside and I have to go to work in thirty minutes. Someone come save me.
I don't have time for a spazzy note (because I have to get ready for work duh) so yeah, sad.
Thanks so much for reading!
Love, Thalia