A/N: I am SO SO SO SO sorry for the long hiatus I took from this fic. I hope this can make it up to you: This fic is finished. I'll be uploading the rest of the chapters over the course of the next couple of days. Let me know what you think!
WARNING: Dubious/really freaking weird consent stuff here, y'all. I don't even know how to describe it.
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What have I done?
Regina stood frozen in place, a roaring sound in her ears, as the realization hit her.
She had completely lost her mind, that's what she'd done. She'd been unhinged. The second she'd laid eyes on the queen's passion-marred skin, she'd begun to form a conclusion. A glance at Emma's neck had proved her right, and then her vision had gone white in a fury unlike any she'd felt in awhile.
She couldn't explain what happened after that. The destruction of her bedroom had gone in a blur, one thought on her mind: Emma reciprocated the Queen's advances. And I have to die.
The likelihood of Jekyll's serum being ready in time was almost nonexistent. If they wanted to beat the Queen, they'd have to kill both versions of her. Regina was going to die, and her hope of ever being with Emma dissipated. A hope that had been growing, foolishly, until she'd seen the physical evidence of passion on the two women, and realized what the Judge's death meant for her.
The marks left on the Queen showed that Emma had reciprocated with a matching ferocity. Had they gone further? Were there more marks where clothes hid?
She couldn't process. She alternated between jealousy and white-hot anger; anger that Emma had fallen for the trap and allowed herself to be distracted, and when Emma had arrived, Regina was in the anger phase. She'd blamed Emma for not being there, when she'd gotten there as fast as she could. The anger had been directed at Emma then, but in reality, she was angry at herself. And, out of anger, jealousy, and self-loathing, she'd forced herself on Emma.
She had split herself, without understanding the price. She had unleashed the worst part of herself on the people she now loved and cared about.
And the only way to stop it was to kill herself. All of herself.
She didn't know if she was strong enough. Especially not now that she'd revealed her feelings to Emma in the worst possible way, resulting in the end of their friendship. She was so stupid. Emma was with the pirate, and she would stay with him. Nothing Regina could have said or done would have changed that, and she was a fool for thinking maybe she could have.
She just picked the worst possible way to make her feelings known. As usual.
With a wave of her now shaking hands, her bedroom became once more immaculate. Then she crossed the room to the chaise lounge, where she felt her knees give way and she fell gracelessly onto it, her body heaving with wave after wave of anguish.
She was alone, and it was all her fault.
Regina didn't know how much time had passed. When she finally stopped sobbing, she laid there, trying to center herself. She could hear the faint sounds of voices coming from downstairs, but couldn't make out anything that was being said. Only one thing mattered: Emma was in the house. Either she'd left and come back or she'd stayed…either way, she may now be telling everyone the horrible details of the day.
That thought sent a fresh wave of fear and anger through her. She needed to be downstairs, defending herself. With purpose, she stood and marched over to the mirror on her wall. Uncovering it, she gasped at her reflection. Her makeup had run, and she had black circles and trails underneath red, swollen eyes.
How pathetic.
Quickly, she used magic to better her appearance, and when she was satisfied, she marched downstairs. When she entered the main living room, what she saw shocked her still. Her entire house was filled with people. Maleficent and Lily had arrived at some point, and were sitting on the couch with Zelena, who was holding baby Robin to her bosom. They were conversing with Snow, David and Henry. Hook had come back too, and was wearing a troubled look even though Emma had practically glued herself to him as they spoke in even lower tones in the corner of the room.
Relief flooded her. She wasn't alone. Her entire family was here, everyone she cared about. And the pirate, the snarky part of her mind reminded her.
She could do this. She just needed a plan. Clearing her throat, she asked, "Has anyone heard from Jekyll?"
All heads turned her way and Snow sighed with relief. "There you are!" she exclaimed. "We were getting worried about you."
"I wanted to go get you," Henry added, "But Ma told me to give you time. She told us what happened today."
And there it was. White-hot rage filled her and she hissed, "What?!" while shooting Emma one of her best death glares. How dare she tell our son what had transpired!
Emma's gaze, which had still been on Hook, finally met Regina's, her eyes wide. "Yeah…I…told them about Frollo. And that we know how-how to-."
Oh, thank the gods. Emma hadn't spoken of anything personal. Tampering down her temper, Regina crossed her arms in front of her. "How to kill her? Kill me?"
Emma nodded slowly and pressed tighter to the damn pirate. Fighting the insane urge to rip her away from him, Regina turned back to the rest of her guests. "I'm sorry to worry you, Henry," she addressed her son. "I had some things to deal with. Obviously. But we need to know how far Jekyll has come with the serum, so we can formulate a plan."
"Well," Zelena piped up, "You were gone for hours, Regina. We're already one step ahead of you."
Hours?
Mal crossed her legs gracefully and smirked, "We got confirmation about a half hour ago that Jekyll finished his serum, Regina."
Regina's heart skipped a beat. "He has? It's successful?" she breathed incredulously. Henry nodded excitedly. "We got a call from Blue. All we need to do is apprehend Hyde again, and we can test it. But Grandpa looked it over, and he said it looks like it will work!"
"And we could already have done so," Lily snapped, "Except Emma took a trip to the shrink and you holed yourself away for almost the whole day. So let's fill her in on the plan, people!" She punctuated her statement with a hateful look at Snow and David, who had the grace to blush in shame. Lily was still angry with them for separating her from her mother. Regina couldn't blame her, honestly.
Wait, did Lily just say Emma had gone to Archie? How long had Regina been upstairs?
That didn't really matter, she decided. Any chance she had with Emma was long gone, and she needed to focus on the good news: Jekyll had finished! She might not have to die!
With a quick nod and her head filled with foolish hope, Regina sat down in an empty chair as they ran the plan by her.
What she forgot to think about, however, was the words of warning Hyde had given her:
"You should ask Jekyll of our story."
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Fire.
The forest was on fire.
And Regina was staring down at the body of Dr. Jekyll.
It had been the biggest showdown Regina had ever seen: dragons in the sky, dwarves swinging their pickaxes, magic shooting from Emma's and her own fingertips. Swords clanging, arrows flying, and every fairy tale villain practically crawling out of the woodwork.
Jekyll had spilled everything as they both lay dying: Jekyll had been the worst part of the two of them. Jekyll had experimented not only on himself but also, rather gruesomely, on women. He used Hyde to reel them in, then performed the experiments until he was caught. He then blamed Hyde in front of the authorities, and all evidence had backed up his claim because the women were seen with Hyde, not Jekyll. All of the deaths had been blamed on Hyde, thus making him a target…until people began to question the nature of Jekyll's serum and started to put two and two together. Jekyll had fled to the Land of Untold Stories to continue developing the serum that would split them forever, so he could return to his land and none would be the wiser to the real culprit.
All Hyde had wanted was for the story to play out. He had seen the way the people of the Land of Untold stories had been suffering, as he himself was suffering, and he wanted it all to end. He had just wanted everyone to be brave enough to finish their stories.
Even worse, Jekyll had admitted that the serum was a fake. It had been a poison. Jekyll had become tired of his own sick inclinations, and had known the one way to cure himself.
A truce had been called during the battle, as Hyde had been captured. Jekyll forced the serum down his throat before taking a mouthful for himself. After a moment, they had both collapsed to the ground.
After his short, choked monologue explaining everything, Jekyll had spoken one last sentence before death took them both:
"I bring the life of that unhappy Henry Jekyll to an end."
Regina and the others had been horrified that they'd worked so closely (even so close as to let him sleep under the same roof as them!) with a deranged serial killer, but they barely had time to think about it before they heard the Queen laughing maniacally as she magicked herself away from the battleground.
Regina waved her hands to extinguish the fire, and silently the survivors of the battle looked around at the charred remnants of the trees. The dragons morphed back into their human forms, and what villains hadn't been defeated disappeared as quickly as they had come.
They had failed.
Emma sidled up to Regina and cautiously spoke. "Regina…" Self-loathing flared and Regina snapped, "Be careful, Ms. Swan. The Queen and I, we're one, even separate."
Emma got the message loud and clear, and stepped back a few paces. "You're right," she deadpanned.
"Indeed," Regina mumbled, still staring at the spilled potion on the ground. In her peripheral vision, she saw Emma walk back to Hook and allow herself to be wrapped in his embrace. Regina wanted to vomit. Instead, she transported herself to her vault without a word to anyone. There was something she needed to do, and she didn't want anyone to try and stop her.
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The second she materialized inside the vault, she was met with a very familiar face smirking at her.
"It's about time, Regina. We have so much to discuss."
"I didn't come here to chat."
"No," the Queen mocked. "you came here to kill us. Really, Regina, is that the only option you have left? Self-sacrifice? How heroic of you."
Regina glared at her counterpart. "Enough," she ground out through gritted teeth. She lifted her hands and a fireball slowly began to flare from her palms. The Queen just rolled her eyes and waved her hand, extinguishing it. "I'm not going to let you kill us. Would you like a drink?"
Regina sighed. There really was no way of doing it by herself, she realized. The Queen wouldn't fight, and killing herself without killing the Queen couldn't be done, so Regina was forced to sit down. She was a fool.
Easing herself into a chair, she sat stiffly and silently.
The Queen watched her for a moment before standing to mix herself a drink. "Do you want one?" she asked casually. Regina didn't answer, so the Queen set about making a second drink before forcing it into Regina's hand. "Drink up, dear," she simpered. "You haven't been looking well."
"You think?" Regina snapped, before downing the contents of the glass in three gulps. Appletini. Of course. She stood and helped herself to a second and then a third glass, before finally sitting down, her mind pleasantly hazy.
"Well, let's chat," she sighed.
"Was the battle worth it?" The Queen asked. "After all, the only thing you heroes managed to do was kill a few random villains and start a wildfire. Not your best accomplishment." Regina shot her a glare. "I just wanted everything to end. I wanted you and I to rejoin. I'm tired, Your Majesty. I'm tired of constantly fighting some threat to myself and my family."
"They really have become your family, haven't they?"
"They really have. They forgave me. They forgave us. Even before we split, I was one of them. It was such a long, slow process. But redemption feels good. I was so alone. That's what you're after, right? You have a hole in your heart just like I did before. You're lonely."
The Queen sneered and avoided answering the invasively intuitive question by switching the subject of the conversation.
"I saw what happened between you and Emma, for a moment in the mirror," The Queen said. She sipped her drink and smiled. "I can't imagine that went well for you, Regina."
"It didn't."
"No, it didn't. We've been in love with her for years now, do you know that? We loved her even when we loved Robin."
Regina nodded. "I never wanted to admit it to myself. She was always so…unattainable, I never even let myself consider the possibility. And now it's too late. She's in love with Hook."
"Hardly. She responded so sweetly to me."
The reminder of Regina's latest cause for anguish was brought back freshly to the forefront of her mind. The Queen must have seen the flash of anger in her eyes, because she leaned in closer, elbows on her knees, a dangerous curve to her lips. "She tastes so divine, and feels even better," she taunted. "I was so aroused, seconds from release even. Her mouth on me, her body over mine, all the passion and fire she's been lacking since the arrival of the walking, one-handed barnacle."
"Shut up. I don't want to hear it," Regina spat, feeling sick to her stomach and yet also feeling a stirring in her belly at the Queen's description.
"Oh, but you do. You know you do. You want to hear about how she flipped me to my back, how her fingers pressed to my sex and how I know she was aroused by the wetness she found there."
Regina felt angry tears sting her eyes as she pictured the scene. Emma had touched her, and yet it hadn't been her. She hadn't been there at all. She could only listen, feeling the pressure in her head and her belly grow with every word. "Stop."
"Her fingers trembled, Regina. She whispered our name and I knew in that moment she was drowning in desire for me. For you. Something we've never seen on her face for that pirate. I was so disappointed when she pushed away from me after that. The change from lust to panic was almost comical."
Regina heard those last words through the rush of her heartbeat in her ears. "She…stopped? Before I called her?"
"Mm, moments before," the Queen confirmed in a bored tone. "It really is a shame you let jealousy get the better of you. I saw the fear in her eyes, through that mirror. You really are the worst version of us. So cowardly, so controlled by your own self-loathing. You never learned to love the best aspects of us."
They sat there in silence, just staring into each others' eyes, waiting. Finally, Regina spoke in a whisper.
"You're right."
The Queen appeared shocked at the admission. "What?" she questioned. Regina stood and crossed the gap between them, kneeling down in front of her counterpart, who stiffened and gripped the arms of the chair she was seated in. "You were right," Regina repeated slowly, staring up at her. "I'm the worst version of us. I chose to split us. I hate myself. I doubt every move I make. I doubt every word I say. I'm a coward. Without you, I'm weak. But you…" she trailed off and lifted a hand to touch a piece of the Queen's long hair, almost amused by the wary look she saw on her face. "You are my passion. My drive. My desire, my determination. You are my defense when I feel helpless. I need you."
The Queen grimaced and hissed, "Too bad. I don't need you."
"That's a lie," Regina smiled softly. "I'm your conscience. I'm your heart. You can't love without me. And you need that."
"You're wrong," the Queen spat. "I've had enough of this conversation. Run along home, stable girl. I have more work to do."
Before Regina could protest, she found herself standing outside the vault. Staring at the door, she sighed. Killing them both wasn't an option, and talking with her hadn't worked. Regina was well and truly lost. Running her hand through her hair, she turned on her heel and began to walk.
She didn't really have a destination in mind when she started her walk, but somehow she ended up standing on Emma's doorstep, having seen lights on inside. What am I doing? she questioned herself before, as though on autopilot, her fist rapped against the hard wood of the door.
It only took a few moments for Emma to open the door, and Regina's heart stuttered when she saw the blonde wearing only a thin white tank top and a pair of small black shorts. Tearing her gaze away from Emma's body, she lifted it to Emma's face, which was shuttered, revealing nothing of what she was feeling. "Regina?" she asked worriedly.
"Do you always answer your door half-dressed?"
Regina winced as soon as the words left her mouth, but Emma just softened and replied, "It's nothing you haven't seen before, Regina."
"No, but is it the appropriate attire to wear when the entire street can see you?"
Victory. Emma's blank expression morphed into a guilty one and she nervously grabbed a long coat from the coat rack by the door, putting it on and tying it closed, much to Regina's relief. It had truly been a feat to keep her gaze on the blonde's face. "I'm sorry," she began. "I just…can we talk, for a moment? Can I come in?"
As if on cue, Hook's voice drifted out of the house. "Who was it, love?" He came into view a second later, and Regina saw that he was shirtless. Oh, gods.
"Oh, Regina," he said as he approached the door, wrapping an arm around Emma. "Can we help you?" He looked so smug, and immediately Regina understood why the two of them had been alone, in Emma's house, outside of the protection of her own home. And the knowledge was a larger punch to the gut than she'd ever though possible. "I-I…um…"
Emma pushed Hook back into the house. "I'll be back up in a minute, okay?" she said to him. "Give us a second."
"Take as much time as you need, Swan. I'll be waiting for you to come back to me." With an unsettled glance at Regina, he turned and walked away.
A few moments passed of Emma looking back to make sure Hook was going upstairs, and then she turned back. "I don't think now is a good time for us to talk, Regina."
"Of course," Regina said quickly. "I imagine you have much to…discuss…with Hook. I was wrong to come here."
This was it. Emma had run from her and straight into the arms of her true love. Regina had been the push Emma needed to finally consummate her relationship with him. Emma had really meant it when she told her never to touch her again. Emma hated her for what she and her counterpart had done.
Turning away in shame, she lifted her hands and was gone before hearing Emma cry out, "Regina, wait!"
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Materializing again in her own bedroom (she'd needed to bypass the Charmings, whom she could hear talking downstairs with Henry, probably filling him in on what happened since he had stayed behind during the battle. She was in no mood for any more talking), she turned and entered her bathroom to start a shower. She disrobed and stepped into the steaming spray, letting the water run down over her head and face. She could feel the tension of the day slowly start to ease. She'd made so many mistakes, and her body was tight with the stress.
When she felt warm, wet hands on her shoulders, she nearly jumped out of her skin. Her yelp of surprise was muffled by a strong hand covering her mouth. She felt a body press into her back…a naked body. A female naked body. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Emma's smirking face as the water soaked her hair. Casting her gaze down, Regina took in Emma's pert breasts, flat stomach and the thatch of perfectly groomed hair between her toned legs. "Wha-"
"Shhh," Emma said. "This will just be our little secret, okay?" She reached for Regina's shampoo bottle, poured some into her hands, and reached forward to wash Regina's hair. As Emma's fingernails scraped softly against her scalp, Regina couldn't stop the rush of desire to her core or the breathy, desperate moan that escaped through her lips. Her eyes slipped closed and she stood there, feeling Emma's touch, in disbelief that the object of her adoration was standing right there in the shower with her. "What about Hook?" she whispered, wanting to curse her conscience. Emma laughed darkly. "What about him?" she asked. "He has no idea I'm in here with you. Let's keep it that way."
Emma rinsed her hair and then ran her wet hands down Regina's back, leaving trails of goosebumps in her wake. "You're so responsive," Emma whispered. "I knew you would be."
The steam was filling up the shower stall, and the heat was making Regina dizzy. Or maybe that was Emma. She shook her head, desperate to clear her mind. Something didn't feel right. "I thought you were angry with me. You should be angry with me."
"How could I be?" Emma asked, reaching around to cup Regina's breasts in her hands, flicking the nipples with her thumbs and eliciting a pained gasp from their owner. "I can't get you out of my mind."
One hand drifted lower, flattening over the expanse of Regina's stomach. "I need you, Regina," Emma whispered in her ear.
Regina's blood ran cold as she realized why everything felt wrong. Emma had an energy about her, a magical one, that Regina knew well and could recognize anywhere, and she didn't sense it. All she sensed was her own magic.
"You're not Emma," she said, pulling away and turning around to face her evil counterpart. "This game again, really?"
Not-Emma grinned widely. "Oh, but it's such a fun game. Don't you like it?" She did a little twirl, and Regina couldn't help but look down at the body in front of her, feeling desire continue to coil in her belly. "How did you get past my wards?" she ground out, fighting with all her might to focus on the dire situation.
"I've been able to break them since the moment you threw them up, Regina. I am YOU. I can break any magic you throw my way."
Regina froze, horrified. "Then you're not after Snow," she realized. The Queen laughed again, shaking her head as she dropped the glamour and revealed her true face and body. "I'm not after Snow," she admitted. "She's not exactly the top of my list anymore."
Regina understood at once. "You're after your happy ending. The hole in your heart…"
"I came here to tell you that you were right. Separate, we can do nothing but continue to harm one another." The Queen interrupted, grabbing Regina's sponge and pouring some soap into it, lathering it slowly between her palms. "What happened to Jekyll and Hyde…I don't want it to happen to us," she continued as she stepped forward and reached out. When Regina recoiled, the Queen rolled her eyes and stepped forward, pressing Regina to the wall. Slowly, she ran the sponge from Regina's neck, down her chest and over her breasts to her hips. "When I kicked you out of the vault, I was angry. After having a moment to think about it, I realized there's only one way to get what I want, and that's to reunite with you, as much as I loathe to admit it."
Regina couldn't believe her ears. There was no way she'd gotten through to the Queen this easily. "This is a trap," she breathed as the Queen continued to wash her body. "Mm, maybe, maybe not," her counterpart sighed as she ran the sponge between Regina's legs, causing her to start and move away from the contact. Chuckling, the Queen went on, "You'll just have to trust me, I suppose. So, we need to figure out how to rejoin. Until then though…I have a proposal."
Regina narrowed her eyes as the Queen waved her hands and stood once again before her in the form of Emma Swan. The Queen smirked and knelt down on one knee to gently wash Regina's legs and feet. "My proposal is this: thanks to you, Emma Swan is more than likely lost to us. Right now, you have a chance to be with her…just once. We can pretend. How does that sound?"
Regina's head had begun to swim again at the vision of Emma kneeling before her, so close to her most intimate parts. It's not real, she told herself. This is wrong.
But as she thought back to the events of the day, from hearing Emma scream at her to never touch her again, to seeing Emma half naked with Hook in her house…she knew. She knew this was the only way to get what she wanted. And the Queen wanted to reunite…so what was the harm in a little role-play with herself?
When she saw and felt the Queen's-Emma's-mouth connect with her aching core, she was lost.
Somehow they made it from the shower to the bedroom, where Not-Emma pushed her down onto the bed and buried her face in Regina's sex once more. Regina cried out loudly, bucking her hips up into the warm, wet mouth. The Queen set to work, flicking her tongue over the swollen clit mercilessly, before pulling back. Regina heard a deafening keening noise escape her throat when the Queen pulled away, but she heard the sound of Emma's laughter and flipped her over to stare down at her. "This doesn't feel right," Regina whispered into the face that was identical to Emma's and yet so much different. The Queen's glamoured lips twisted into a smile that didn't at all suit Emma's face, and whispered back, "I'm giving you a gift, Regina. You'd be wise to take it."
Regina watched as the Queen ran a hand over her own nipple, and her mouth watered when she saw it pucker under the attention. But she was coming to her senses, slowly. Everything about the situation was wrong. And no matter how hard her sex was throbbing, no matter how sexy the being in front of her was, she couldn't continue on. It felt an awful lot like betraying Emma. And she loved Emma, as a woman, as the mother of their son, and taking advantage of her visage wasn't right.
"We have to stop," Regina said, pulling away. "I can't."
The Queen's eyes flashed. "No," she snarled. "Don't let that conscience kick in now, we've already come too far. You want Emma and I want to get off, before I'm stuck back with you for the rest of my life. Enjoy this body, Regina. Taste it. Feel it."
She grabbed Regina's hand and placed it between her legs, and Regina almost cried from the force of desire that slammed into her at the feeling of the soaked folds. She allowed herself a weak moment to touch, then pulled her hand back and wiped her fingers on the sheets. "No," she said firmly. "I can't."
The Queen growled and surged forward, grabbing Regina's face and pulling it to her own, mashing their lips together….
And the bedroom door burst open.